Author's Note:
Arhurhurhur!
Caca-chan the Almighty has brought her bad writing skills over from X-men:
Evolution to Invader Zim! Bewaaaaaaaaare of her wraath! Oh yes, Caca-chan the
Almighty is tainting ff.net with her horrible skills and OOC…-ness.
Caca-chan the
Almighty would like to take this moment to say that she, in no shape or form,
owns Invader Zim. If she did, she would not be writing crapular fan fiction for
the entertainment of these petty mortals. Instead, she would be wallowing in
her own filth while, at the SAME time, wallowing in some green stuff that looks
almost like money because all the REAL money would be in an un-FDIC insured
bank. Oh, yes. The story has some Dib
Angst (If you could call it that), and Dib/Zim. Now on to Caca-chan the
Almighty's story!
Dib picked
up the exacto knife and examined it. Life had treated him like crap for the
past seventeen years and now he just wanted it all to end. Gaz, his own sister,
hated him (Or… at least, that's how he saw it, what with all the threats and
stuff.), Zim hated him, even though they had come to some sort of common
ground, and the entire hi-skool student body hated him. Now, Dib could
understand why Zim hated him. After all, he had tried to expose him! But what
he couldn't understand was why Gaz hated him, why hi-skool hated him. Sure, Dib was different, but so was Gaz and
all the other's who dressed darkly. Plus, Dib had stopped his rants about
aliens years ago and had drawn himself into his own mind. He only spoke when
prompted, now. No, he couldn't find a plausible reason as to why everyone hated
him, but he was sure it was good.
Dib
glanced at the screen of his computer, his e-mail had been sent. Excellent.
Everything was going as planned. He had sent an e-mail to Gaz and Zim telling
them his good-byes and apologies and how much he would miss them. He hadn't
sent one to his father-Professor Membrane-they had barely spoken enough words
to make a three minute conversation in all of Dib's seventeen years of life: it
was like sending a good-bye letter to the telemarketer who had called the other
day.
Dib gave a cynical smile to no one and, before Gaz could
check her mail, pulled up the sleeves of his trench coat and put two deep slits
in both of his wrists. It didn't hurt. He lay down on his bed and closed his
eyes.
-*-
Gaz looked up from her Game Slave and glared at the
blinking light on her computer. Someone had sent her an e-mail. Whoever sent her the e-mail would have to
pay dearly. She paused the game (The
Scary Monkey Game, which was harder than it sounded) and walked up to the
computer. It was from Dib, which aroused her curiosity, because Dib never sent
her e-mail. She hit the 'Open' button
and began to read:
"Dearest
Gazzy,
Well,
I don't know what to say. Here I am, writing you my good-bye letter and I have
nothing to say! I guess I should say that I'm sorry for making you lose all
those games, as I know it greatly annoyed you. I sincerely hope that you'll
forgive me. I should also say that I'm proud at how beautiful you've become,
little sis. (This was true. Gaz had grown into a beautiful young woman and if
she didn't threaten to rip off the manly-ness of every male who came within
five feet of her, she would have been swamped with courtships. But alas, her
Game Slave was her one, true love.)
"So now I'm finally doing something right, Gazzy! You'll
never lose a game again. I'm out of your life forever. Good-bye, sis.
-Dib"
Gaz stared at the letter and its
morbid cheerfulness for a few minutes, then stumbled out the door and down the
hall towards Dib's room just as Zim tripped into the house.
-*-
Zim had been surfing the
internet as he usually did after hi-skool these day since he no longer had
plans to invade Earth. The Almighty Tallest had told him that they no longer
wished to hear from him about three years ago despite his considerable increase
in height (He was about the size of a thirteen year old then. Now, he was about
the size of a normal seventeen year old). When Zim had admitted to Dib that he
was an alien, in hopes that he would turn him in to the government so they
would kill him, Dib said he wouldn't turn him in if he kept living and them
proceeded to comfort him!
Zim never figured out why Dib
comforted him, but he suspected it was the beginning of an obvious depression.
After that, the two never spoke again, but Zim could see Dib's eventual
withdrawal from society. Lately, though, Zim had noticed that Dib had drawn
more into himself and never spoke, even when if teacher called on him. He was worried about the only person he ever
cared about.
When Zim saw the e-mail icon pop up, he didn't even have to
open the mailbox to know who it was.
In three seconds flat, Zim had
on his human disguise and was half way out the door when GIR interrupted him,
"Where ya' goooooin?" GIR rocked back and forth on his feet.
"Out."
"Ooooo…where?"
"Dib's."
"Aww…how sweet! You and Dib are
in loooooove!" GIR squeeled.
Zim shut the door behind him before GIR could say
anything else and started running to Dib's house. On his way, Zim thought about what GIR had said. Did Zim really
"love" Dib? Yes. No. No. Yes. Oh, love
is so confusing!
Within minutes Zim had reached the house. He grabbed the
doorknob, twisted , pushed, and tripped at the same time, thus effectively
getting in the house but wasting valuable time getting up. He saw Gaz half falling, half running into Dib's room. She screamed and backed out slowly, her
amber eyes wide.
Zim ran into Dib's room and
almost backed out himself when he saw Dib laying on his bed with blood soaking
his clothes and sheets.
"Oh Mother of Irk, Dib?"
