The ticking of a single wall clock rang in Shawn's ears and thumped mercilessly at his conscience. Had he really just chased away the person who meant everything to him? Had he single-handedly destroyed a lifetime's worth of dreams? In the minute and a half since Angela had taken off, Shawn's heart sunk lower than he ever believed possible. It was a feeling that did not sit well with the anxiety that flowed through his nerves.
The night was not supposed to go this way. The apartment was not supposed to be empty, grey or somber. Had everything gone according to plan, he and Angela would have been holding each other close, feeling each other's heartbeats, cherishing the precious few moments before he would ask her that one special question. He had visualized the scenario so many times he could almost feel the warmth of her breath on his skin. The harshness of his solitude, however, would not allow Shawn to lie to himself so easily.
There was no way around it. Angela was gone. She had walked out of his life, and the scalding expression of anger on her face when she left gave Shawn no indication that she would be returning anytime soon. He couldn't let her go like this. He couldn't afford to let his own stupidity cost him the greatest love he would ever know.
As if suddenly overcome by a surge of electricity, Shawn's feet were no longer able to keep still. He raced out of the apartment, flew down the stairs and stepped into the damp, dreary night air. The coolness bit into his skin and prompted a wild cry of desperation.
"Angela!" he shouted. "Angela, come back to me!"
Although his love may have only been gone for a few moments' time, there was no sign of the dark, slender young girl as far as Shawn could see down East Belmont St. Where could she possibly have gone at this hour? Would she be okay? Did she have any intention of coming back tonight?
Shawn peeked around corners and sped down dark alleys, calling out Angela's name every few steps. To his intense disappointment and fear, his cries warranted no response. Despair burrowed into the depths of his heart, and Shawn's only option was to turn back toward home. The anger that had heated his infuriated soul just minutes ago had died down into an overwhelming sense of devastation. Hot, stinging tears welled up in the corners of his eyes, and he wiped them vigorously with the loose material from his shirt sleeve.
As his feet took heavy steps up the stairs of his apartment building, Shawn passed his floor and opted to continue climbing upward, aiming to find solace on that faithful open-air platform that was the rooftop. Although the rooftop conjured strikingly vivid memories of Angela, Shawn could not deny that the power of the moon and the stars had never led him wrong.
He breathed deeply, tasting the crisp night air, tainted only by the saltiness of his tears. Angela was out there somewhere, walking through the city down below, and his final resort was to wait calmly and pray that she would return.
Shawn found a cozy spot in one corner, where the velvety night sky seemed to swallow him up wholly. All he wanted was to drown his remorse in a bit of hope, gasping for a breath of air that would signify that everything would be okay.
He wanted to beat himself up for yelling at Angela the way he did. He wanted to hurt himself for hurting the person that made life worth living for him. Angela was already supposed to move out in a week and a half, and unless she returned to him, ready to talk things out, she would be moving out of his apartment, his life, forever.
Shawn plunged his hand into his pocket and fished for the ring box as he slumped against the ledge. His fingers rubbed lightly against the soft velvet surface momentarily before he pulled the box out into the open air. Shawn closed his eyes as he opened the tiny container, almost afraid that his heart wouldn't be able to handle holding the tiny jewel.
Shawn's eyes opened slowly, hesitantly, and the delicate ring looked more beautiful than ever in the glow of the moonlight. His heart began to crumble all over again as the shine of the diamond caught his eye and reminded him of how he'd hoped Angela would look at him upon his proposal.
He carefully pulled the ring out of its position in the box and held it up to the sky. "Angela," he whispered. "I love you. Will you marry me?"
Only the chaotic sound of traffic in the distance replied. Shawn released a hopeless, inaudible laugh as he continued to talk to himself. "To think I believed that something was going to go my way. I'm such an idiot." He examined the ring closely as he spoke. "Yes Shawn Hunter, you are indeed an idiot."
Shawn emerged from his uncomfortable sitting position and stretched his arms up toward the stars before putting his body at ease once again. "I love you, Angela," he said again. "I love you, and I'm an idiot, and I want to be with you forever." Shawn paced along the edge of the roof, reciting the words over and over. "I love you, Angela."
Why hadn't he had the sense to tell her that before she stormed out of the apartment? Why couldn't he have just pulled her into his embrace and done whatever it would have taken to keep her there with him forever? Why did he feel like it was too late for him to even care?
Shawn wiped the tears from his eyes, red and swollen with regret, placed the ring back into the box and slid the box back into his pocket. False hope had never gotten him anything but heartache, although he couldn't help but find himself continually dreaming of Angela.
With his head hanging low and tears still lining the corners of his crystal blue eyes, Shawn approached the stairs that led back to his apartment. He didn't want to leave the rooftop, but he couldn't bring himself to stay. For a moment at least, he just didn't want to exist anymore.
The world held nothing for him, he thought as he truly began to believe that their relationship, though often tumultuous and dramatic in the past, had actually reached its true end.
As Shawn's foot touched the edge of the staircase, a startling vision sent chills running up his spine. A dark, shadowy figure stood before him, looking weary and frail in the night. Though not radiating with strength and confidence as she usually did, there was no denying that the young girl who stood a few feet away was the love of Shawn's life.
Shawn fought the darkness to find the expression in Angela's eyes. They did not look angry or scornful, as they had before. They reflected a sense of sadness, the same look of sorrow that hung grimly over Shawn's features. Without one word spoken between them, Shawn could see that his and Angela's hearts were once again perfectly in sync.
Angela felt a surprising rush of warmth sweep over her body upon making eye contact with the man she loved. This person who had raised his voice to her with such contempt now stood absolutely still -- insecure, emotionally distraught, and aching for her to hold him. While Angela had not been able to completely disregard the argument they'd had earlier, something inside her just wouldn't allow her to walk away from a greater love than she could ever hope to see again.
The two could only stare at each other for a few seconds, both longing to reach out and comfort the other but still paralyzed with fear over the harsh words that had been spoken before. Shawn swallowed hard and finally worked up the courage to speak.
"Angela..." he whispered her name with such tenderness, as if it were a precious commodity that had to be handled with absolute care. "I --." His words were cut off by the feel of Angela's fingertip against his quivering lips. She silently pleaded with him to save his words.
Shawn was caught off guard by Angela's simple gesture. He began to worry all over again. What if she hadn't returned to make up with him? What if she had intended this to be the final goodbye? What if...?
His thoughts were once again interrupted by a sudden move from Angela. This time it was different, though. Her soft, delicate hands were caressing his neck, her body was placed firmly against his, and her lips were about a millimeter away from sending Shawn into total and complete ecstasy.
Pushing all feelings of confusion and fear outside of his consciousness, Shawn closed his eyes, followed Angela's lead, and thanked the stars above for this moment. Even if she would still resent him later, even if she wouldn't agree to be his wife, she was somehow pulled back into his arms for one glorious, heavenly moment. It may not have been his life's dream, but for the time, it was the very best he could have hoped for.
The night was not supposed to go this way. The apartment was not supposed to be empty, grey or somber. Had everything gone according to plan, he and Angela would have been holding each other close, feeling each other's heartbeats, cherishing the precious few moments before he would ask her that one special question. He had visualized the scenario so many times he could almost feel the warmth of her breath on his skin. The harshness of his solitude, however, would not allow Shawn to lie to himself so easily.
There was no way around it. Angela was gone. She had walked out of his life, and the scalding expression of anger on her face when she left gave Shawn no indication that she would be returning anytime soon. He couldn't let her go like this. He couldn't afford to let his own stupidity cost him the greatest love he would ever know.
As if suddenly overcome by a surge of electricity, Shawn's feet were no longer able to keep still. He raced out of the apartment, flew down the stairs and stepped into the damp, dreary night air. The coolness bit into his skin and prompted a wild cry of desperation.
"Angela!" he shouted. "Angela, come back to me!"
Although his love may have only been gone for a few moments' time, there was no sign of the dark, slender young girl as far as Shawn could see down East Belmont St. Where could she possibly have gone at this hour? Would she be okay? Did she have any intention of coming back tonight?
Shawn peeked around corners and sped down dark alleys, calling out Angela's name every few steps. To his intense disappointment and fear, his cries warranted no response. Despair burrowed into the depths of his heart, and Shawn's only option was to turn back toward home. The anger that had heated his infuriated soul just minutes ago had died down into an overwhelming sense of devastation. Hot, stinging tears welled up in the corners of his eyes, and he wiped them vigorously with the loose material from his shirt sleeve.
As his feet took heavy steps up the stairs of his apartment building, Shawn passed his floor and opted to continue climbing upward, aiming to find solace on that faithful open-air platform that was the rooftop. Although the rooftop conjured strikingly vivid memories of Angela, Shawn could not deny that the power of the moon and the stars had never led him wrong.
He breathed deeply, tasting the crisp night air, tainted only by the saltiness of his tears. Angela was out there somewhere, walking through the city down below, and his final resort was to wait calmly and pray that she would return.
Shawn found a cozy spot in one corner, where the velvety night sky seemed to swallow him up wholly. All he wanted was to drown his remorse in a bit of hope, gasping for a breath of air that would signify that everything would be okay.
He wanted to beat himself up for yelling at Angela the way he did. He wanted to hurt himself for hurting the person that made life worth living for him. Angela was already supposed to move out in a week and a half, and unless she returned to him, ready to talk things out, she would be moving out of his apartment, his life, forever.
Shawn plunged his hand into his pocket and fished for the ring box as he slumped against the ledge. His fingers rubbed lightly against the soft velvet surface momentarily before he pulled the box out into the open air. Shawn closed his eyes as he opened the tiny container, almost afraid that his heart wouldn't be able to handle holding the tiny jewel.
Shawn's eyes opened slowly, hesitantly, and the delicate ring looked more beautiful than ever in the glow of the moonlight. His heart began to crumble all over again as the shine of the diamond caught his eye and reminded him of how he'd hoped Angela would look at him upon his proposal.
He carefully pulled the ring out of its position in the box and held it up to the sky. "Angela," he whispered. "I love you. Will you marry me?"
Only the chaotic sound of traffic in the distance replied. Shawn released a hopeless, inaudible laugh as he continued to talk to himself. "To think I believed that something was going to go my way. I'm such an idiot." He examined the ring closely as he spoke. "Yes Shawn Hunter, you are indeed an idiot."
Shawn emerged from his uncomfortable sitting position and stretched his arms up toward the stars before putting his body at ease once again. "I love you, Angela," he said again. "I love you, and I'm an idiot, and I want to be with you forever." Shawn paced along the edge of the roof, reciting the words over and over. "I love you, Angela."
Why hadn't he had the sense to tell her that before she stormed out of the apartment? Why couldn't he have just pulled her into his embrace and done whatever it would have taken to keep her there with him forever? Why did he feel like it was too late for him to even care?
Shawn wiped the tears from his eyes, red and swollen with regret, placed the ring back into the box and slid the box back into his pocket. False hope had never gotten him anything but heartache, although he couldn't help but find himself continually dreaming of Angela.
With his head hanging low and tears still lining the corners of his crystal blue eyes, Shawn approached the stairs that led back to his apartment. He didn't want to leave the rooftop, but he couldn't bring himself to stay. For a moment at least, he just didn't want to exist anymore.
The world held nothing for him, he thought as he truly began to believe that their relationship, though often tumultuous and dramatic in the past, had actually reached its true end.
As Shawn's foot touched the edge of the staircase, a startling vision sent chills running up his spine. A dark, shadowy figure stood before him, looking weary and frail in the night. Though not radiating with strength and confidence as she usually did, there was no denying that the young girl who stood a few feet away was the love of Shawn's life.
Shawn fought the darkness to find the expression in Angela's eyes. They did not look angry or scornful, as they had before. They reflected a sense of sadness, the same look of sorrow that hung grimly over Shawn's features. Without one word spoken between them, Shawn could see that his and Angela's hearts were once again perfectly in sync.
Angela felt a surprising rush of warmth sweep over her body upon making eye contact with the man she loved. This person who had raised his voice to her with such contempt now stood absolutely still -- insecure, emotionally distraught, and aching for her to hold him. While Angela had not been able to completely disregard the argument they'd had earlier, something inside her just wouldn't allow her to walk away from a greater love than she could ever hope to see again.
The two could only stare at each other for a few seconds, both longing to reach out and comfort the other but still paralyzed with fear over the harsh words that had been spoken before. Shawn swallowed hard and finally worked up the courage to speak.
"Angela..." he whispered her name with such tenderness, as if it were a precious commodity that had to be handled with absolute care. "I --." His words were cut off by the feel of Angela's fingertip against his quivering lips. She silently pleaded with him to save his words.
Shawn was caught off guard by Angela's simple gesture. He began to worry all over again. What if she hadn't returned to make up with him? What if she had intended this to be the final goodbye? What if...?
His thoughts were once again interrupted by a sudden move from Angela. This time it was different, though. Her soft, delicate hands were caressing his neck, her body was placed firmly against his, and her lips were about a millimeter away from sending Shawn into total and complete ecstasy.
Pushing all feelings of confusion and fear outside of his consciousness, Shawn closed his eyes, followed Angela's lead, and thanked the stars above for this moment. Even if she would still resent him later, even if she wouldn't agree to be his wife, she was somehow pulled back into his arms for one glorious, heavenly moment. It may not have been his life's dream, but for the time, it was the very best he could have hoped for.