-Beyond My Hopes -
A Pokemon Fanfiction by Kayley Laskitt (savetheempire@optusnet.com.au)
Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I understand this comes as quite a shock as I am not in the entertainment industry, not residing in Japan and haven't even finished high school yet.
Author's Notes: This is not my first fanfic, though it is the first Pokemon fanfic I've posted. I don't take well to flames, and I don't want to hear any bitching from anyone who isn't an egoshipper. Both the summary and this note warns you. If you don't like it, don't read it.
In this fanfic, you should probably pretend that Pallet is not a nowheresville town. The characters are also older, though that should be fairly obvious.
Comments and constructive criticism welcome.
**
Chapter Three: Sun Comes Down
Okay. Here's an embarrassing fact. At one point, in my younger, jerkier, more chauvinistic years, I actually kept a list of all the girls I hooked up with. I ditched that particular habit at about seventeen, but it was a pretty long list by the time I got through.
But you know what? Not one of those girls compares with Misty.
In the couple of weeks we've been dating, I've learnt to appreciate Misty for many things. She's beautiful. She's smart. She's sweet. She's witty.
But oh my God, the girl can kiss. I mean, she has a gift or something.
I guess that's why we get a little carried away sometimes.
I slip my hand under her sweater slightly, and I guess it's enough to surprise Misty because she pulls away. "Whoa, easy tiger," she breathes, sitting back in her seat. I think we spend more time in my car than anywhere else sometimes. "I think we need to slow down."
I sit back too, and smooth down my mussed hair. "Why?" I ask.
Misty turns to face me, her blue-green eyes narrowed, looking like she's all too ready to smack me in the face given half the chance. "Why?" she echoes, in disbelief. "You jerk. How does 'because I said so' work for you?"
I realise how what I just said sounded, and I sigh. "No, Mist, I didn't mean it like that," I assure her, itching to touch her but knowing I better explain myself before I do. "I didn't mean it like you need to explain yourself if you want to slow down. You know me better than that." Her face softens slightly. "It's just that . . . I don't know, we've been further than this. Why this sudden barrier?"
Misty rolls her eyes, but thankfully she doesn't look angry anymore. She gestures to the fact that we're in my car, in a street in the middle of Pallet. "Uh, hello? Public place. People might see us."
The words are general, but I get straight away what she's not saying. I sit back even further in my seat, and this time I'm scowling. "Right. People like Ash because you haven't told him yet."
Misty takes my hand and rubs her thumb over my hand. She knows I love that. "Come on," she says softly. "You said you weren't going to push me."
I snort in disbelief and stare out the windscreen, my jaw set. "Yeah, Misty. I said I wasn't going to push you like three weeks ago."
She lifts her chin and gets that mildly haughty look on her face that never fails to boil me. "I wasn't aware I was working on a schedule," she says airily.
Okay, she's in one of those I'm-right zones. That means I have to choose my words carefully if I want to keep all my limbs.
"Misty," I begin calmly but firmly. "I love spending time with you. You know that. But I meant what I said a couple of weeks ago. I can't date you if you don't tell Ash."
Misty exhales, causing her hair to flutter slightly. She leans back against the door, as though she's trying to sit as far from me as possible. "Why do we have to make this about other people?" she demands irritably, twirling a beaded bracelet around her wrist. "Why can't this just be about us?"
Oh, she's definitely being stubborn. This isn't going to be easy to handle.
What is it that my grandfather always says about honesty and best policies?
"Because," I respond, keeping my voice flat the way I do when I'm about to do the sharing-of-feelings thing I've never been good at. "I don't want to be your dirty little secret. And that's exactly what I am if you can't tell people about us."
I see her lashes flutter uncertainly as she looks down at her lap, tracing patterns on the leg of her fitted camel pants. She stays silent for a few anxious minutes, then she lifts her head. Every trace of irritation from before has disappeared, replaced by apology. "I'm sorry," she says sincerely, which I know is hard for her, because she hates apologizing. "I didn't mean to make you feel like that. And even though it's hard for me to tell Ash, I know it's just as hard for you to sit by and wonder why I haven't."
Funny how she knows me so well already.
I rest a hand on her knee, and she places hers on top of mine. "So you'll tell him?" I ask.
Misty nods, a lock of shiny red-gold hair falling across her cheek. "I will," she responds. "As long as you never ask me 'why' again."
"Deal," I agree.
Her face lights up then, which is a sight I wish I could tape. She lifts my hand and gently presses her lips to it, which sounds a hell of a lot more harmless than it feels.
"Deal," she echoes softly, lifting one corner of her mouth in a smile. She lets go of my hand, and it immediately flies to the gear stick.
I throw her brazen, mischievous grin. "I'm glad you're going to tell Ash . . . but first I think we need to get out of here."
Misty laughs melodically and sits back, reaching out to touch my knee. "Deal."
I don't see Ash till the following morning. Gary dropped me off at like 2am, and Ash was either asleep or not home. Either way, I figured it wasn't the best time to bring it up.
I wake up at about ten, which is pretty late by Ash's standards, which is why it surprises me to find him up, dressed and finishing off breakfast.
"Hey," I say nonchalantly as I walk into the kitchen. I cross the tiles to the fridge and pull it open, studying the contents. There's not much - it's Saturday, the day Delia usually goes shopping, which is subsequently the day we usually run out of food.
Ash swallows a mouthful of Frosties and nods. "Morning," he greets me, sounding abnormally cheerful. I wonder if the abnormal cheerfulness and early wake-up are connected at all.
I pull a bottle of juice from the fridge, slam it shut and grab an apple from the ceramic bowl on the counter. An apple and juice for breakfast. Better than nothing, I guess.
Ash eyes my breakfast. "There's still Frosties left," he offers, angling his head towards the pantry.
I sit down and offer an ironic smile. "As tempting as it sounds to rot my teeth, I think I'll stick with the apple."
Ash shakes his head. "Kids these days. Don't understand the value of processed food."
I laugh, and twist the lid off my juice.
It's tempting - and I mean really tempting - to conveniently forget mine and Gary's discussion of yesterday and just have a chat with Ash, like the old times. But I know I've put it off for long enough.
I swallow some orange-passionfruit juice, cough slightly and wipe my palms on the knees of my light blue cords. "Where's your mom?" I ask, not as a procrastination technique but out of genuine curiosity.
"Professor Oak's, I think," Ash informs me, refilling his milk glass. He looks at me over the carton, as though he's expecting me to make some comment on the issue.
I push my juice and uneaten apple away, and force a smile. "Good. Because I kind of need to talk to you about something."
I kind of need to talk to you about something? Could I vague that up anymore?
Ash's smooth brow furrows slightly, and he sets his glass down on the table. "And this something is something you can't talk about in front of my mom?"
I roll my shoulders back in an attempt to relax. "I'd rather not."
Ash looks part curious, part concerned. "Okay. What's up?"
I take a deep breath, not wanting to screw this up. I mean, this is some serious stuff going on here. And I've spent a lot of time thinking of how I want to say this.
"Did you watch that movie on cable last month?" I ask, my words coming out too quickly. "You know, the one with the guy and his chick friend and the other guy and his cousin? And the first guy liked the other guy's cousin and the other guy liked the other guy's friend? And so they tried to set each other up with the girls because they both thought the other guy was just so right for each girl, only they ended falling for the wrong people, but they turned out to be the right people? And it had a whole 'right kind of wrong' theme going for it, because even if you fall for someone who everyone else would say is the wrong person, it's okay as long as you think it's the right person . . . " I trail off, exhausted. "Do you know where I'm going with this?"
Ash nods slowly, looking down at the yellow tablecloth. "Uh, yeah." He looks up, and shifts, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "I thought you might bring this up. How come you never said anything before?"
God, he's taking this well. I shrug. "I guess I was just . . . I don't know, scared. Telling you would have made it all the more real, you know?"
Ash rakes a hand through his hair, still toying with the edge of the tablecloth. He drops the tablecloth and reaches across the table to touch my hand. "I'm sorry."
I eye him oddly. I mean, out of all the reactions I expected that wasn't one of them. "Why are you apologizing?" I ask, frowning.
Ash looks even more uncomfortable, if that's possible. I can tell his left leg is bouncing up and down slightly from nerves. "For keeping secrets," he responds, his voice quiet and directed to his Vans. "I really should have told you that I was seeing May."
Secrets. Told. Seeing. May.
Okay, way too much information to deal with. I react in the only way possible.
"You're what?" I cry, jumping up from my seat like someone just stuck a pin into me.
Ash jumps up from his seat too, shoving back his chair so quickly that it teeters precariously before settling itself back down. "What do you mean 'you're what'?" Ash demands, looking beyond confused. "You knew . . . didn't you?"
"How would I know?" I snap, throwing my arms in the air exasperatedly. I take a few steps away, feeling mildly suffocated. "Do I look like a goddamn mind reader?"
Ash rubs his hands over his face the way he always does when he's about to lose it. "Then what the hell were you talking about?"
Oh, no. He's not going to turn this whole thing around on me. "My god, Ash! How is it possible I didn't know about this?"
Ash strides forward and grabs my shoulders, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "Misty!" he says sharply. "Forget that! What the hell were you talking about?"
I pull away and walk towards the counter, leaning back against it. "I had no idea you were seeing May," I say acidly. "I was planning to tell you that I've been seeing Gary."
I don't realise till after I've said it what exactly I just said. Ash's face turned that shade of white he turns when he's angry. Really angry.
I've only seen that a couple of times. The last time was when we broke up.
"You're what?" Ash demands, his voice rising.
"You heard me!" I respond, my voice rising to match his. "You got a problem with that?"
I can see Ash's fist clench. He's really pissed off. "Yes," he said, jaw clenched. "I have a problem with that." He jabs a finger at me. "I don't want you dating that guy!"
I place my hands on my hips and lift my chin. "Well, guess what, Ash? It's not your decision."
Ash stares at me for a few tense seconds before wrenching his eyes from mine. He storms to the telephone stand and snatches his keys up.
A knot of dread forms in my stomach. "Where are you going?" I ask hesitantly.
Ash turns to glare at me, dangling his keys from his thumb. "I'm going to the Oak's. If you won't listen to me, I'll make Gary listen."
I watch as May pours herself a glass of water and takes a sip. As she does, she lifts her eyes to look at me. I cross my eyes and stick my tongue out at her, so only she will notice. And she does. She tries not to laugh and chokes.
Delia, seated beside May, turns concerned eyes towards her and pats her on the back. "Are you okay, May?" she asks, brow furrowed.
May sits her glass down, throws me a glare and concentrates on regulating her breathing. She coughs, tears springing in the corner of her eyes.
"I'm fine," she manages between coughs.
My grandfather, who is seated on the other side of May looks as concerned as Delia. "Are you sure, May? You've gone all red."
May gives me an absolute death look and I try not to laugh. The girl is obsessed with her appearance.
May pushes back her chair, the rubber-tipped legs grating along the wooden decking. "Excuse me," she says demurely, standing up and smoothing the front of her tartan skirt. "I think I'll go inside for a minute." I watch as she walks towards the glass sliding doors. Once inside, her composed, demure expression changes completely, and she makes a face at me through the glass.
I hold back a laugh and look down at the table.
Delia and my grandfather carry on their little love-fest all around me and I tune out. In the distance, I hear a car door slam, followed by footsteps. They sound pretty close, actually. Close as the driveway even.
"Ash, wait!"
It's barely audible, but I swear it's Misty's voice. Maybe I'm paranoid, but as her boyfriend, it's probably my duty to check, right?
Oh, wow. Boyfriend. You know, I haven't actually said that before.
I excuse myself, go into the house and pull open the front door in time to see Ash about to pound down the door and Misty standing behind him, arms folded over her chest protectively.
"Gary," Ash greets me through clenched teeth.
"Ash," I return, calmly.
Ash pushes past me into the house and Misty follows. She looks so pretty, her cheeks all pink from the cold and bundled up in a white puffy coat. "Hey," she greets me with a smile.
"Hey," I respond, with that goofy smile I get around her.
Ash shuts the front door a little forcefully and tries to stare me down. "We need to talk," he tells me sharply.
I glance at Misty. "What's going on?"
She shrugs. "I told him."
Ohh . . . she actually did it. I glance at Ash. And he's really, really pissed.
"I'm gonna say this once," Ash snaps, stabbing a finger at me. "You are not dating Misty."
I pretend to consider his words. "That's funny, because I could have sworn I was." I look at Misty. "Did you think that, Misty?"
She nods weakly, looking like can think of a million places she'd rather be than here. I feel a twinge of something, and I resist the urge to step closer to her or hug her or something.
"I want you to stay away from her," Ash hisses, looking ready to seriously invade my personal space. "I know what you're doing, and I want you to leave her alone."
I feel my anger rise despite my attempts to quell it. I push my hair out of my face and glare at Ash. "What the hell would you know? You don't know a damn thing about Misty and me so don't think you have any right to tell me what to do."
Before Ash has a chance to respond, I hear the familiar sound of May's boots clicking against the tiled floor. Sure enough, she rounds the corner, pulling her fingers through her unnaturally blonde hair. I think the blonde looks tacky on her, but trying telling her that.
"What's going on?" she asks. "I can hear you . . ." She trails off upon seeing Ash and Misty. Her lips curve into a smile. "Ash."
"May," Ash returns, copying her tone. They smile at each other for a second, which makes me uncomfortable. I've seen that smile. It's the same one I give Misty.
May turns to me, head angled, one ridiculously large gold hoop earring brushing her shoulder. "What's going on?"
Ash answers for me. "Did you have any idea Gary and Misty are dating?"
May laughs. "No, they're not." She looks at me, her delicate brow furrowed. "Are you?" I shrug helplessly and May's head falls back. "Christ, Gary!" she exclaims, irritably. "You're dating her?"
I can't help notice the emphasis she applies to the word 'her'. Apparently, Misty doesn't miss it either.
"Do you have a problem with that?" Misty demands sharply, stepping forward and managing to look menacing despite the white puffy coat and bouncy ponytail.
May rolls her dark eyes. "Oh, you're real classy," she says sarcastically. She turns her attention back to me, her dark eyes narrowed. "What the hell are you thinking? And how the hell is it possible that I didn't know about this?"
It's Misty's turn to roll her eyes. "Oh, and I suppose the word 'hell' suddenly became all class, did it?" she asks dryly.
Oh, great. Both Misty and May in uber-bitch mode is just what I need right now.
May tossed her meticulously tousled locks over her thin shoulders. "I don't recall pushing your buzzer, Opinion Girl," May states loftily.
Misty steps closer, and I'm a little worried she's gonna take her on right here, right now. "Don't you even try pulling that holier-than-thou crap on me," she spits. "You're such a hypocrite."
May flushes at the word 'hypocrite' and throws a wide-eyed look at Ash. Misty looks triumphant and a knot of dread forms in my stomach. I have a feeling I know what this means, but I have to ask.
"Hypocrite?" I echo, staring hard at Misty. "What's that supposed to mean?"
My triumph is put on pause as Gary stares at me, looking a little sick, waiting for my response. His sister may be a first-class bitch but he loves her and I know he isn't going to like what I have to say.
"You didn't know?" I ask, putting on the bitchy act for May's benefit. I can practically feel her radiating annoyance. "Ash has been dating your sister."
"What?" The word comes out sharply, like the snap of a dry stick, and I start a little. I can't recall ever hearing Gary so angry before. "May, is this true?"
May lifts her chin, toying with her too-styled, too-blonde hair. "What do you care?" she asks.
Gary's jaw tightens, to the point where I can almost see the muscles ticking. "I care a lot," he says with clenched teeth. "I care a damn lot. I don't want you going anywhere near him."
"And what are you going to do about it, Oak?" Ash's voice is filled with as much anger as Gary's, and I fold my arms tightly, suddenly cold.
Gary moves forward, looking like he would give anything to deck Ash. "You stay out of this, Ketchum!" Gary barks.
Ash moves forward too, the space between him and Gary getting smaller and smaller. "Why the hell should I?" Ash demands, his voice rising. "It's my life you're trying to dictate here!"
May looks at me sideways, her expression cool, composed. "Are you happy?" she asks, the harshness in her voice unmistakable. "Were you aiming for this?"
"Were you?" I retort. May annoys the hell out of me sometimes. Maybe because she reminds me of my sisters. "Well, I for one hope that things work out for you and Ash. I hope you enjoy coming second to Pokemon."
May smirks, and turns fully to face me. "Did you ever consider, Misty, that it was only you that Ash put second? And not all girls?"
Oh, that stings. That really hit way too close to home for my liking.
I smile a saccharine smile at May. "Well, I don't know. Maybe you should tell me." I pause, lowering my voice slightly. "You're the . . . expert . . . with guys here, aren't you?"
It's kind of scary the way May's face darkens so noticeably, so quickly. She drops her little airs and graces and glares at me downright viciously. "What the hell are you trying to say?" she demands.
I lift my hands in the air in a gesture of hopelessness, and pause, playing my upper hand. "I'm not saying anything. Your track record says it all for you."
Her face strips of color, and she turns an odd shade of pale gray. It's strange to see such a confident, bitchy girl crumble like that. I guess no one likes to hear that kind of thing about themselves.
May doesn't get a chance to respond, though. She's interrupted by Gary tearing into Ash.
"You were born scum, Ketchum!" Gary bites out angrily. "You were born into scum, and you'll die as scum and I don't care how many Pokemon you catch or how many battles you win! You don't deserve to even come within a ten-mile radius of my sister, let alone talk to her!"
Ash throws the first punch, a left-hook that catches Gary right off guard. But Gary retaliates twice as hard, and pretty soon the two guys are practically trying to kill each other.
May moves closer to me, glaring. "See what you've done?" she cries angrily.
"Me?" I ask, indignantly. "You had just as much to do with this as I did. Probably more so - at least I actually care for your brother. At least I'm not toying with him like you are with Ash! Like you've done with - oh, I don't know, every guy in Pallet?"
I admit, I'm surprised when May pounces at me and slaps me clear across the face. Who knew a girl who looks like a Barbie could pack such a slap?
"I am not a slut!" she cries, sounding more emotional than I can recall. Hit a little close to home, have I?
I push her off me, and she stumbles in her boots. "Who said you were?" I snap, a little touchy. I'm not used to people slapping me. "I just said you had a track record."
May brushes at the front of her sweater, shaking visibly. "I know what that means," she hisses. "Just because you never said the word 'slut' doesn't mean anything. At least I can get a guy, huh, Misty? At least I have more than two credits up my sleeve!"
I feel my cheeks heat up at that. I guess Ash must have told her that he was the first guy I ever went out with. Jerk.
"Oh, that's something to be really proud of," I say sarcastically.
May stares at me, but I can see tears in the corner of her eyes. "Can you do better?" she asks nastily, but I can tell the nastiness is a cover.
"Yeah, well, at least guys don't screw me over and then go and laugh about it with all their friends!" I shoot back. "At least I have a little self respect!"
May raises her hand to slap me again, and I catch her wrist. It surprises her, and she stares at me, stunned, for a few seconds. I push her away as hard as I can and she very nearly falls over.
But before May can come at me or do anything, a voice booms through the foyer. It's loud, authoritative and stops all four of us in our tracks.
Professor Oak rounds the corner, Delia at his heels. "What the hell is going on here?"
I stop, still gripping onto the collar of Ash's shirt. My arm had been pulled back, ready to smack him in the face when my grandfather came in. I let my arm drop to my side, surprised.
"You better have a damn good explanation," my grandfather continues, and I let go of Ash's collar. He steps back and adjusts his shirt. Like that'll help. Like the blood trickling from his lip and the emerging bruises aren't tell tale enough.
I take the opportunity to glance at Misty and May. May is standing on one side of the foyer, arms folded protectively as she glares hatefully at Misty. Misty is sporting a red cheek and looks pretty pissed off.
Ash straightens, like he's about to explain, but Delia jabs a finger at her son. "Quiet," she orders sharply. "All of you, in the living room now."
I've never heard Delia speak with such authority. It's kind of scary.
The four of us file into the living room and sit down on the four seater. Delia and grandfather each take an armchair. Misty sits at one end of the couch, Ash at the other. Myself and May are stuck between them. I can't remember the last time I've been in such an awkward situation.
"Who wants to start?" my grandfather asks, and even though he's angry, I can hear something else in his voice I rarely hear. Disappointment.
We remain sullenly silent for a few seconds. Then Misty speaks up. "May and Ash are dating," she informs them flatly.
May scowls. "Yeah, well so what? So are Gary and Misty."
Misty leans over me to look at May. "Why don't you shut that damn mouth of yours for once?"
"Why don't you?" May responds irritably.
"Hey!" Delia holds up her hands and looks from Misty to May. "Would you two calm down? Can we discuss this rationally?"
I snort. That's a joke. Ash and I are battered and bruised, May's still reeling from whatever Misty said to her and Misty will be lucky to not have a bruise on her cheek. The word 'rational' does not apply to this situation.
"I want to know what happened, and why," Delia states, oddly calm.
Misty shifts. I think she's gearing up to tell Delia. When she rests a hand on my knee, I'm sure of it. "Do I have to spell it out?" she asks, rhetorically.
My grandfather responds to that one, running a hand over his thinning hair. "No, I guess not," he agrees. He leans forward, fixing me with an intense stare. "Do you care to tell your side of the story?"
I push back my hair, and am mildly surprised to find blood near my hairline. "I just found out Ash and May have been dating," I say wearily. "And I'm not happy with that."
May falls back against the couch and sighs. "I'm not a little girl any more, Gary," she reminds me.
I close my eyes and exhale. "I know that," I hiss. "But you don't exactly have a stellar record. And I don't trust Ash as far as I can throw him."
Ash, beside May, snorts. "Oh, that's rich," he mutters.
I feel my face flush and I glare at Ash, blaming him for it. "You got something to say, Ketchum, you better come right out and say it," I warn.
Ash meets my gaze, not shying away in the slightest. "I'll say it," he agrees. "You want to talk about less than stellar track records? Let's discuss all the girls you've been through over the years. Or do we not have time for that?"
My jaw clenches. "Shut up."
"Why?" Ash asks. "Don't want Misty to know how many girls you've used? Don't want her to know how many girls you've sweet-talked and dated till you got what you want out of them?" His voice drops ominously. "I want you to stay the hell away from her because I know what you're like, Oak," he tells me. "And you and I both know that once you get what you want out of Misty, you'll ditch her as fast as you can."
I jump up from my seat, glaring down at Ash, hating the way my clenched fist is shaking. I hate the way he's assuming these things and I hate the way Misty could be believing him. "I would never do that to Misty," I say tightly, my jaw clenched as tight as my fist.
Ash stands too, to look me straight in the eye. "Why not?' he asks, sounding indulgent, like the way an adult would address a child. "Why is Misty so different?"
I look down at Misty, whose eyes are directed at the carpet. Even from here I can tell that her lower lip is probably shaking. I glance up again at Ash, who's fixed me with a triumphant eye. My anger rises.
"Because I love her!" My words come out short, harsh. "So screw you Ash, because you don't know a damn thing!"
Ash looks shocked, and I realise what I've just said. I can feel five sets of eyes burning into me and it's enough to make me uncomfortable.
"Forget it," I mumble, stepping around everyone and heading for the door. "Just forget it."
Because I love her.
The words repeat in my mind as I pick at the fabric of the arm of the chair, trying to make sense of the whole thing. Judging by the suddenly cold, empty space beside me and the complete absence of any sound, it happened.
He loves me.
He loves me and now because of Ash, he's gone.
I stand up and step over May to where Ash is still standing. Then I shove him in the chest, hard enough to make him brace himself against the couch.
"You jerk!" I snap, backing him up against the wall and all too ready to strike out. "Do you see what you just did?"
Ash hits the wall and his eyes widen with panic. "Misty, I -"
"Save it!" I hold up a warning finger and he shuts up. "Right now, I have to go find Gary. But don't think I won't be kicking your ass when I get back."
Then I turn and storm out of the room. I can almost hear Ash breathe a sigh of relief.
I pull open the heavy front door in time to see Gary getting into his car. He sees me and casts his eyes away, looking sorrowful. I run after him, not bothering to close the door.
"Gary, wait!"
He hears me, pretends not to and gets in the car.
"Gary!"
He shuts the door.
I get to the car before he has the chance to start the ignition and pull the door open. "Gary, just stop for a second," I beg. "Please."
Gary pauses, sighs, then slides out of the car. "Misty, let it go," he says, sounding more tired than he deserves to be.
"No." I say it calmly, determinedly, and he looks at me, surprised. I lay a hand on his arm, feeling his warmth through his shirt. "Did you mean what you said in there?"
Gary sighs and lifts his broad shoulders half-heartedly. He looks skyward. "What does it matter?" he asks flatly.
I move closer, staring up at his chiseled, perfect features, suddenly so closed off. "How can you say that?" I ask, honestly. "How can you say it doesn't matter?"
He looks down at me, obviously struggling to keep his eyes neutral. "Because it doesn't. Like you'll care after what Ash said about me."
Ohh . . . okay, I get it. I gaze up at Gary. "You think that because Ash said a whole lot of things about your reputation, that I won't care?"
He shrugs, which, for Gary, is as good as a nod. His jaw clenches and unclenches, and I blink, stunned. Is it possible that Gary is going to cry?
"You were an absolute sleaze," I tell him.
He nods.
"You used and abused a different girl every day."
He nods morosely.
"You treated women like they existed solely for your own entertainment."
He nods barely, his eyes cast down.
I laugh a little, and touch his chin, making him look up. "And I don't care," I tell him honestly, saying each word slowly so there's no mistake. "I'm not going to judge you on how you treated other girls. I'm going to judge you on how you've treated me." I smile at the way his dark eyes light up a little at my words. "And you've treated me with nothing but care and respect."
He smiles at me with liquid eyes and rests a hand on my hip. "I meant what I said in there," he says softly, so soft I almost wonder whether I heard right.
"Really?" I say, barely audible.
Gary nods. "I love spending time with you. I love the way your eyes get darker as the night sets in. I love the way you tell it like it is. I love the way you make me smile for no reason." He grins. "And I was thinking about this all, and I realised maybe I love you."
I lift an eyebrow, touched by his words but not wanting to show it. "Maybe?" I echo teasingly.
He returns the grin, placing his other hand on my other hip and pulling me towards him. "Maybe more than maybe," he concedes. He turns serious suddenly, his eyes going all dark and somber. I love it when they do that. "What about you?"
Wow. Loaded question.
I think about it before saying anything. "I love being with you and I love the way you make me feel. But we've only been dating for three weeks and a couple of weeks before that I was with Ash. So I'm taking my time. But," I say, with a small smile. "If this isn't love, it's very close."
"Thank You by The Whitlams," Gary says without skipping a beat, grinning. "You've got to get up pretty early in the morning to beat me at that game."
I punch him in the arm lightly. "There'll be plenty of time for getting up early in the morning later."
Gary raises his eyebrows suggestively and I laugh. Then I rest my head against his chest and sober. "It isn't going to be easy, you know," I say seriously. "There'll be people in our way."
Gary idly runs a hand up and down my back. "So we'll run them over with my car," he says lightly. "No sweat."
I laugh a little, but I'm still not at ease. And I guess Gary can tell because he pulls me away so he can look me in the eye.
"Hey," he says softly. "We'll make it work."
Warmed by this, I wrap my arms around his neck and just revel in his presence. There's a sense of calm that was never there with Ash.
As Gary holds me, I spy Ash watching us from the house over Gary's shoulder. I almost pull away, but then Ash smiles. It's hardly noticeable, but it's there.
He understands.
I smile back, to show him that I understand too.
Maybe Gary and Ash will never be best friends again, just like May and I will probably never be good friends. But the two most important guys in my life are the two most important guys in May's life and because of that we're all irrevocably linked.
It won't be easy. But I believe Gary.
We'll make it work.
I know we will.
A Pokemon Fanfiction by Kayley Laskitt (savetheempire@optusnet.com.au)
Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I understand this comes as quite a shock as I am not in the entertainment industry, not residing in Japan and haven't even finished high school yet.
Author's Notes: This is not my first fanfic, though it is the first Pokemon fanfic I've posted. I don't take well to flames, and I don't want to hear any bitching from anyone who isn't an egoshipper. Both the summary and this note warns you. If you don't like it, don't read it.
In this fanfic, you should probably pretend that Pallet is not a nowheresville town. The characters are also older, though that should be fairly obvious.
Comments and constructive criticism welcome.
**
Chapter Three: Sun Comes Down
Okay. Here's an embarrassing fact. At one point, in my younger, jerkier, more chauvinistic years, I actually kept a list of all the girls I hooked up with. I ditched that particular habit at about seventeen, but it was a pretty long list by the time I got through.
But you know what? Not one of those girls compares with Misty.
In the couple of weeks we've been dating, I've learnt to appreciate Misty for many things. She's beautiful. She's smart. She's sweet. She's witty.
But oh my God, the girl can kiss. I mean, she has a gift or something.
I guess that's why we get a little carried away sometimes.
I slip my hand under her sweater slightly, and I guess it's enough to surprise Misty because she pulls away. "Whoa, easy tiger," she breathes, sitting back in her seat. I think we spend more time in my car than anywhere else sometimes. "I think we need to slow down."
I sit back too, and smooth down my mussed hair. "Why?" I ask.
Misty turns to face me, her blue-green eyes narrowed, looking like she's all too ready to smack me in the face given half the chance. "Why?" she echoes, in disbelief. "You jerk. How does 'because I said so' work for you?"
I realise how what I just said sounded, and I sigh. "No, Mist, I didn't mean it like that," I assure her, itching to touch her but knowing I better explain myself before I do. "I didn't mean it like you need to explain yourself if you want to slow down. You know me better than that." Her face softens slightly. "It's just that . . . I don't know, we've been further than this. Why this sudden barrier?"
Misty rolls her eyes, but thankfully she doesn't look angry anymore. She gestures to the fact that we're in my car, in a street in the middle of Pallet. "Uh, hello? Public place. People might see us."
The words are general, but I get straight away what she's not saying. I sit back even further in my seat, and this time I'm scowling. "Right. People like Ash because you haven't told him yet."
Misty takes my hand and rubs her thumb over my hand. She knows I love that. "Come on," she says softly. "You said you weren't going to push me."
I snort in disbelief and stare out the windscreen, my jaw set. "Yeah, Misty. I said I wasn't going to push you like three weeks ago."
She lifts her chin and gets that mildly haughty look on her face that never fails to boil me. "I wasn't aware I was working on a schedule," she says airily.
Okay, she's in one of those I'm-right zones. That means I have to choose my words carefully if I want to keep all my limbs.
"Misty," I begin calmly but firmly. "I love spending time with you. You know that. But I meant what I said a couple of weeks ago. I can't date you if you don't tell Ash."
Misty exhales, causing her hair to flutter slightly. She leans back against the door, as though she's trying to sit as far from me as possible. "Why do we have to make this about other people?" she demands irritably, twirling a beaded bracelet around her wrist. "Why can't this just be about us?"
Oh, she's definitely being stubborn. This isn't going to be easy to handle.
What is it that my grandfather always says about honesty and best policies?
"Because," I respond, keeping my voice flat the way I do when I'm about to do the sharing-of-feelings thing I've never been good at. "I don't want to be your dirty little secret. And that's exactly what I am if you can't tell people about us."
I see her lashes flutter uncertainly as she looks down at her lap, tracing patterns on the leg of her fitted camel pants. She stays silent for a few anxious minutes, then she lifts her head. Every trace of irritation from before has disappeared, replaced by apology. "I'm sorry," she says sincerely, which I know is hard for her, because she hates apologizing. "I didn't mean to make you feel like that. And even though it's hard for me to tell Ash, I know it's just as hard for you to sit by and wonder why I haven't."
Funny how she knows me so well already.
I rest a hand on her knee, and she places hers on top of mine. "So you'll tell him?" I ask.
Misty nods, a lock of shiny red-gold hair falling across her cheek. "I will," she responds. "As long as you never ask me 'why' again."
"Deal," I agree.
Her face lights up then, which is a sight I wish I could tape. She lifts my hand and gently presses her lips to it, which sounds a hell of a lot more harmless than it feels.
"Deal," she echoes softly, lifting one corner of her mouth in a smile. She lets go of my hand, and it immediately flies to the gear stick.
I throw her brazen, mischievous grin. "I'm glad you're going to tell Ash . . . but first I think we need to get out of here."
Misty laughs melodically and sits back, reaching out to touch my knee. "Deal."
I don't see Ash till the following morning. Gary dropped me off at like 2am, and Ash was either asleep or not home. Either way, I figured it wasn't the best time to bring it up.
I wake up at about ten, which is pretty late by Ash's standards, which is why it surprises me to find him up, dressed and finishing off breakfast.
"Hey," I say nonchalantly as I walk into the kitchen. I cross the tiles to the fridge and pull it open, studying the contents. There's not much - it's Saturday, the day Delia usually goes shopping, which is subsequently the day we usually run out of food.
Ash swallows a mouthful of Frosties and nods. "Morning," he greets me, sounding abnormally cheerful. I wonder if the abnormal cheerfulness and early wake-up are connected at all.
I pull a bottle of juice from the fridge, slam it shut and grab an apple from the ceramic bowl on the counter. An apple and juice for breakfast. Better than nothing, I guess.
Ash eyes my breakfast. "There's still Frosties left," he offers, angling his head towards the pantry.
I sit down and offer an ironic smile. "As tempting as it sounds to rot my teeth, I think I'll stick with the apple."
Ash shakes his head. "Kids these days. Don't understand the value of processed food."
I laugh, and twist the lid off my juice.
It's tempting - and I mean really tempting - to conveniently forget mine and Gary's discussion of yesterday and just have a chat with Ash, like the old times. But I know I've put it off for long enough.
I swallow some orange-passionfruit juice, cough slightly and wipe my palms on the knees of my light blue cords. "Where's your mom?" I ask, not as a procrastination technique but out of genuine curiosity.
"Professor Oak's, I think," Ash informs me, refilling his milk glass. He looks at me over the carton, as though he's expecting me to make some comment on the issue.
I push my juice and uneaten apple away, and force a smile. "Good. Because I kind of need to talk to you about something."
I kind of need to talk to you about something? Could I vague that up anymore?
Ash's smooth brow furrows slightly, and he sets his glass down on the table. "And this something is something you can't talk about in front of my mom?"
I roll my shoulders back in an attempt to relax. "I'd rather not."
Ash looks part curious, part concerned. "Okay. What's up?"
I take a deep breath, not wanting to screw this up. I mean, this is some serious stuff going on here. And I've spent a lot of time thinking of how I want to say this.
"Did you watch that movie on cable last month?" I ask, my words coming out too quickly. "You know, the one with the guy and his chick friend and the other guy and his cousin? And the first guy liked the other guy's cousin and the other guy liked the other guy's friend? And so they tried to set each other up with the girls because they both thought the other guy was just so right for each girl, only they ended falling for the wrong people, but they turned out to be the right people? And it had a whole 'right kind of wrong' theme going for it, because even if you fall for someone who everyone else would say is the wrong person, it's okay as long as you think it's the right person . . . " I trail off, exhausted. "Do you know where I'm going with this?"
Ash nods slowly, looking down at the yellow tablecloth. "Uh, yeah." He looks up, and shifts, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "I thought you might bring this up. How come you never said anything before?"
God, he's taking this well. I shrug. "I guess I was just . . . I don't know, scared. Telling you would have made it all the more real, you know?"
Ash rakes a hand through his hair, still toying with the edge of the tablecloth. He drops the tablecloth and reaches across the table to touch my hand. "I'm sorry."
I eye him oddly. I mean, out of all the reactions I expected that wasn't one of them. "Why are you apologizing?" I ask, frowning.
Ash looks even more uncomfortable, if that's possible. I can tell his left leg is bouncing up and down slightly from nerves. "For keeping secrets," he responds, his voice quiet and directed to his Vans. "I really should have told you that I was seeing May."
Secrets. Told. Seeing. May.
Okay, way too much information to deal with. I react in the only way possible.
"You're what?" I cry, jumping up from my seat like someone just stuck a pin into me.
Ash jumps up from his seat too, shoving back his chair so quickly that it teeters precariously before settling itself back down. "What do you mean 'you're what'?" Ash demands, looking beyond confused. "You knew . . . didn't you?"
"How would I know?" I snap, throwing my arms in the air exasperatedly. I take a few steps away, feeling mildly suffocated. "Do I look like a goddamn mind reader?"
Ash rubs his hands over his face the way he always does when he's about to lose it. "Then what the hell were you talking about?"
Oh, no. He's not going to turn this whole thing around on me. "My god, Ash! How is it possible I didn't know about this?"
Ash strides forward and grabs my shoulders, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "Misty!" he says sharply. "Forget that! What the hell were you talking about?"
I pull away and walk towards the counter, leaning back against it. "I had no idea you were seeing May," I say acidly. "I was planning to tell you that I've been seeing Gary."
I don't realise till after I've said it what exactly I just said. Ash's face turned that shade of white he turns when he's angry. Really angry.
I've only seen that a couple of times. The last time was when we broke up.
"You're what?" Ash demands, his voice rising.
"You heard me!" I respond, my voice rising to match his. "You got a problem with that?"
I can see Ash's fist clench. He's really pissed off. "Yes," he said, jaw clenched. "I have a problem with that." He jabs a finger at me. "I don't want you dating that guy!"
I place my hands on my hips and lift my chin. "Well, guess what, Ash? It's not your decision."
Ash stares at me for a few tense seconds before wrenching his eyes from mine. He storms to the telephone stand and snatches his keys up.
A knot of dread forms in my stomach. "Where are you going?" I ask hesitantly.
Ash turns to glare at me, dangling his keys from his thumb. "I'm going to the Oak's. If you won't listen to me, I'll make Gary listen."
I watch as May pours herself a glass of water and takes a sip. As she does, she lifts her eyes to look at me. I cross my eyes and stick my tongue out at her, so only she will notice. And she does. She tries not to laugh and chokes.
Delia, seated beside May, turns concerned eyes towards her and pats her on the back. "Are you okay, May?" she asks, brow furrowed.
May sits her glass down, throws me a glare and concentrates on regulating her breathing. She coughs, tears springing in the corner of her eyes.
"I'm fine," she manages between coughs.
My grandfather, who is seated on the other side of May looks as concerned as Delia. "Are you sure, May? You've gone all red."
May gives me an absolute death look and I try not to laugh. The girl is obsessed with her appearance.
May pushes back her chair, the rubber-tipped legs grating along the wooden decking. "Excuse me," she says demurely, standing up and smoothing the front of her tartan skirt. "I think I'll go inside for a minute." I watch as she walks towards the glass sliding doors. Once inside, her composed, demure expression changes completely, and she makes a face at me through the glass.
I hold back a laugh and look down at the table.
Delia and my grandfather carry on their little love-fest all around me and I tune out. In the distance, I hear a car door slam, followed by footsteps. They sound pretty close, actually. Close as the driveway even.
"Ash, wait!"
It's barely audible, but I swear it's Misty's voice. Maybe I'm paranoid, but as her boyfriend, it's probably my duty to check, right?
Oh, wow. Boyfriend. You know, I haven't actually said that before.
I excuse myself, go into the house and pull open the front door in time to see Ash about to pound down the door and Misty standing behind him, arms folded over her chest protectively.
"Gary," Ash greets me through clenched teeth.
"Ash," I return, calmly.
Ash pushes past me into the house and Misty follows. She looks so pretty, her cheeks all pink from the cold and bundled up in a white puffy coat. "Hey," she greets me with a smile.
"Hey," I respond, with that goofy smile I get around her.
Ash shuts the front door a little forcefully and tries to stare me down. "We need to talk," he tells me sharply.
I glance at Misty. "What's going on?"
She shrugs. "I told him."
Ohh . . . she actually did it. I glance at Ash. And he's really, really pissed.
"I'm gonna say this once," Ash snaps, stabbing a finger at me. "You are not dating Misty."
I pretend to consider his words. "That's funny, because I could have sworn I was." I look at Misty. "Did you think that, Misty?"
She nods weakly, looking like can think of a million places she'd rather be than here. I feel a twinge of something, and I resist the urge to step closer to her or hug her or something.
"I want you to stay away from her," Ash hisses, looking ready to seriously invade my personal space. "I know what you're doing, and I want you to leave her alone."
I feel my anger rise despite my attempts to quell it. I push my hair out of my face and glare at Ash. "What the hell would you know? You don't know a damn thing about Misty and me so don't think you have any right to tell me what to do."
Before Ash has a chance to respond, I hear the familiar sound of May's boots clicking against the tiled floor. Sure enough, she rounds the corner, pulling her fingers through her unnaturally blonde hair. I think the blonde looks tacky on her, but trying telling her that.
"What's going on?" she asks. "I can hear you . . ." She trails off upon seeing Ash and Misty. Her lips curve into a smile. "Ash."
"May," Ash returns, copying her tone. They smile at each other for a second, which makes me uncomfortable. I've seen that smile. It's the same one I give Misty.
May turns to me, head angled, one ridiculously large gold hoop earring brushing her shoulder. "What's going on?"
Ash answers for me. "Did you have any idea Gary and Misty are dating?"
May laughs. "No, they're not." She looks at me, her delicate brow furrowed. "Are you?" I shrug helplessly and May's head falls back. "Christ, Gary!" she exclaims, irritably. "You're dating her?"
I can't help notice the emphasis she applies to the word 'her'. Apparently, Misty doesn't miss it either.
"Do you have a problem with that?" Misty demands sharply, stepping forward and managing to look menacing despite the white puffy coat and bouncy ponytail.
May rolls her dark eyes. "Oh, you're real classy," she says sarcastically. She turns her attention back to me, her dark eyes narrowed. "What the hell are you thinking? And how the hell is it possible that I didn't know about this?"
It's Misty's turn to roll her eyes. "Oh, and I suppose the word 'hell' suddenly became all class, did it?" she asks dryly.
Oh, great. Both Misty and May in uber-bitch mode is just what I need right now.
May tossed her meticulously tousled locks over her thin shoulders. "I don't recall pushing your buzzer, Opinion Girl," May states loftily.
Misty steps closer, and I'm a little worried she's gonna take her on right here, right now. "Don't you even try pulling that holier-than-thou crap on me," she spits. "You're such a hypocrite."
May flushes at the word 'hypocrite' and throws a wide-eyed look at Ash. Misty looks triumphant and a knot of dread forms in my stomach. I have a feeling I know what this means, but I have to ask.
"Hypocrite?" I echo, staring hard at Misty. "What's that supposed to mean?"
My triumph is put on pause as Gary stares at me, looking a little sick, waiting for my response. His sister may be a first-class bitch but he loves her and I know he isn't going to like what I have to say.
"You didn't know?" I ask, putting on the bitchy act for May's benefit. I can practically feel her radiating annoyance. "Ash has been dating your sister."
"What?" The word comes out sharply, like the snap of a dry stick, and I start a little. I can't recall ever hearing Gary so angry before. "May, is this true?"
May lifts her chin, toying with her too-styled, too-blonde hair. "What do you care?" she asks.
Gary's jaw tightens, to the point where I can almost see the muscles ticking. "I care a lot," he says with clenched teeth. "I care a damn lot. I don't want you going anywhere near him."
"And what are you going to do about it, Oak?" Ash's voice is filled with as much anger as Gary's, and I fold my arms tightly, suddenly cold.
Gary moves forward, looking like he would give anything to deck Ash. "You stay out of this, Ketchum!" Gary barks.
Ash moves forward too, the space between him and Gary getting smaller and smaller. "Why the hell should I?" Ash demands, his voice rising. "It's my life you're trying to dictate here!"
May looks at me sideways, her expression cool, composed. "Are you happy?" she asks, the harshness in her voice unmistakable. "Were you aiming for this?"
"Were you?" I retort. May annoys the hell out of me sometimes. Maybe because she reminds me of my sisters. "Well, I for one hope that things work out for you and Ash. I hope you enjoy coming second to Pokemon."
May smirks, and turns fully to face me. "Did you ever consider, Misty, that it was only you that Ash put second? And not all girls?"
Oh, that stings. That really hit way too close to home for my liking.
I smile a saccharine smile at May. "Well, I don't know. Maybe you should tell me." I pause, lowering my voice slightly. "You're the . . . expert . . . with guys here, aren't you?"
It's kind of scary the way May's face darkens so noticeably, so quickly. She drops her little airs and graces and glares at me downright viciously. "What the hell are you trying to say?" she demands.
I lift my hands in the air in a gesture of hopelessness, and pause, playing my upper hand. "I'm not saying anything. Your track record says it all for you."
Her face strips of color, and she turns an odd shade of pale gray. It's strange to see such a confident, bitchy girl crumble like that. I guess no one likes to hear that kind of thing about themselves.
May doesn't get a chance to respond, though. She's interrupted by Gary tearing into Ash.
"You were born scum, Ketchum!" Gary bites out angrily. "You were born into scum, and you'll die as scum and I don't care how many Pokemon you catch or how many battles you win! You don't deserve to even come within a ten-mile radius of my sister, let alone talk to her!"
Ash throws the first punch, a left-hook that catches Gary right off guard. But Gary retaliates twice as hard, and pretty soon the two guys are practically trying to kill each other.
May moves closer to me, glaring. "See what you've done?" she cries angrily.
"Me?" I ask, indignantly. "You had just as much to do with this as I did. Probably more so - at least I actually care for your brother. At least I'm not toying with him like you are with Ash! Like you've done with - oh, I don't know, every guy in Pallet?"
I admit, I'm surprised when May pounces at me and slaps me clear across the face. Who knew a girl who looks like a Barbie could pack such a slap?
"I am not a slut!" she cries, sounding more emotional than I can recall. Hit a little close to home, have I?
I push her off me, and she stumbles in her boots. "Who said you were?" I snap, a little touchy. I'm not used to people slapping me. "I just said you had a track record."
May brushes at the front of her sweater, shaking visibly. "I know what that means," she hisses. "Just because you never said the word 'slut' doesn't mean anything. At least I can get a guy, huh, Misty? At least I have more than two credits up my sleeve!"
I feel my cheeks heat up at that. I guess Ash must have told her that he was the first guy I ever went out with. Jerk.
"Oh, that's something to be really proud of," I say sarcastically.
May stares at me, but I can see tears in the corner of her eyes. "Can you do better?" she asks nastily, but I can tell the nastiness is a cover.
"Yeah, well, at least guys don't screw me over and then go and laugh about it with all their friends!" I shoot back. "At least I have a little self respect!"
May raises her hand to slap me again, and I catch her wrist. It surprises her, and she stares at me, stunned, for a few seconds. I push her away as hard as I can and she very nearly falls over.
But before May can come at me or do anything, a voice booms through the foyer. It's loud, authoritative and stops all four of us in our tracks.
Professor Oak rounds the corner, Delia at his heels. "What the hell is going on here?"
I stop, still gripping onto the collar of Ash's shirt. My arm had been pulled back, ready to smack him in the face when my grandfather came in. I let my arm drop to my side, surprised.
"You better have a damn good explanation," my grandfather continues, and I let go of Ash's collar. He steps back and adjusts his shirt. Like that'll help. Like the blood trickling from his lip and the emerging bruises aren't tell tale enough.
I take the opportunity to glance at Misty and May. May is standing on one side of the foyer, arms folded protectively as she glares hatefully at Misty. Misty is sporting a red cheek and looks pretty pissed off.
Ash straightens, like he's about to explain, but Delia jabs a finger at her son. "Quiet," she orders sharply. "All of you, in the living room now."
I've never heard Delia speak with such authority. It's kind of scary.
The four of us file into the living room and sit down on the four seater. Delia and grandfather each take an armchair. Misty sits at one end of the couch, Ash at the other. Myself and May are stuck between them. I can't remember the last time I've been in such an awkward situation.
"Who wants to start?" my grandfather asks, and even though he's angry, I can hear something else in his voice I rarely hear. Disappointment.
We remain sullenly silent for a few seconds. Then Misty speaks up. "May and Ash are dating," she informs them flatly.
May scowls. "Yeah, well so what? So are Gary and Misty."
Misty leans over me to look at May. "Why don't you shut that damn mouth of yours for once?"
"Why don't you?" May responds irritably.
"Hey!" Delia holds up her hands and looks from Misty to May. "Would you two calm down? Can we discuss this rationally?"
I snort. That's a joke. Ash and I are battered and bruised, May's still reeling from whatever Misty said to her and Misty will be lucky to not have a bruise on her cheek. The word 'rational' does not apply to this situation.
"I want to know what happened, and why," Delia states, oddly calm.
Misty shifts. I think she's gearing up to tell Delia. When she rests a hand on my knee, I'm sure of it. "Do I have to spell it out?" she asks, rhetorically.
My grandfather responds to that one, running a hand over his thinning hair. "No, I guess not," he agrees. He leans forward, fixing me with an intense stare. "Do you care to tell your side of the story?"
I push back my hair, and am mildly surprised to find blood near my hairline. "I just found out Ash and May have been dating," I say wearily. "And I'm not happy with that."
May falls back against the couch and sighs. "I'm not a little girl any more, Gary," she reminds me.
I close my eyes and exhale. "I know that," I hiss. "But you don't exactly have a stellar record. And I don't trust Ash as far as I can throw him."
Ash, beside May, snorts. "Oh, that's rich," he mutters.
I feel my face flush and I glare at Ash, blaming him for it. "You got something to say, Ketchum, you better come right out and say it," I warn.
Ash meets my gaze, not shying away in the slightest. "I'll say it," he agrees. "You want to talk about less than stellar track records? Let's discuss all the girls you've been through over the years. Or do we not have time for that?"
My jaw clenches. "Shut up."
"Why?" Ash asks. "Don't want Misty to know how many girls you've used? Don't want her to know how many girls you've sweet-talked and dated till you got what you want out of them?" His voice drops ominously. "I want you to stay the hell away from her because I know what you're like, Oak," he tells me. "And you and I both know that once you get what you want out of Misty, you'll ditch her as fast as you can."
I jump up from my seat, glaring down at Ash, hating the way my clenched fist is shaking. I hate the way he's assuming these things and I hate the way Misty could be believing him. "I would never do that to Misty," I say tightly, my jaw clenched as tight as my fist.
Ash stands too, to look me straight in the eye. "Why not?' he asks, sounding indulgent, like the way an adult would address a child. "Why is Misty so different?"
I look down at Misty, whose eyes are directed at the carpet. Even from here I can tell that her lower lip is probably shaking. I glance up again at Ash, who's fixed me with a triumphant eye. My anger rises.
"Because I love her!" My words come out short, harsh. "So screw you Ash, because you don't know a damn thing!"
Ash looks shocked, and I realise what I've just said. I can feel five sets of eyes burning into me and it's enough to make me uncomfortable.
"Forget it," I mumble, stepping around everyone and heading for the door. "Just forget it."
Because I love her.
The words repeat in my mind as I pick at the fabric of the arm of the chair, trying to make sense of the whole thing. Judging by the suddenly cold, empty space beside me and the complete absence of any sound, it happened.
He loves me.
He loves me and now because of Ash, he's gone.
I stand up and step over May to where Ash is still standing. Then I shove him in the chest, hard enough to make him brace himself against the couch.
"You jerk!" I snap, backing him up against the wall and all too ready to strike out. "Do you see what you just did?"
Ash hits the wall and his eyes widen with panic. "Misty, I -"
"Save it!" I hold up a warning finger and he shuts up. "Right now, I have to go find Gary. But don't think I won't be kicking your ass when I get back."
Then I turn and storm out of the room. I can almost hear Ash breathe a sigh of relief.
I pull open the heavy front door in time to see Gary getting into his car. He sees me and casts his eyes away, looking sorrowful. I run after him, not bothering to close the door.
"Gary, wait!"
He hears me, pretends not to and gets in the car.
"Gary!"
He shuts the door.
I get to the car before he has the chance to start the ignition and pull the door open. "Gary, just stop for a second," I beg. "Please."
Gary pauses, sighs, then slides out of the car. "Misty, let it go," he says, sounding more tired than he deserves to be.
"No." I say it calmly, determinedly, and he looks at me, surprised. I lay a hand on his arm, feeling his warmth through his shirt. "Did you mean what you said in there?"
Gary sighs and lifts his broad shoulders half-heartedly. He looks skyward. "What does it matter?" he asks flatly.
I move closer, staring up at his chiseled, perfect features, suddenly so closed off. "How can you say that?" I ask, honestly. "How can you say it doesn't matter?"
He looks down at me, obviously struggling to keep his eyes neutral. "Because it doesn't. Like you'll care after what Ash said about me."
Ohh . . . okay, I get it. I gaze up at Gary. "You think that because Ash said a whole lot of things about your reputation, that I won't care?"
He shrugs, which, for Gary, is as good as a nod. His jaw clenches and unclenches, and I blink, stunned. Is it possible that Gary is going to cry?
"You were an absolute sleaze," I tell him.
He nods.
"You used and abused a different girl every day."
He nods morosely.
"You treated women like they existed solely for your own entertainment."
He nods barely, his eyes cast down.
I laugh a little, and touch his chin, making him look up. "And I don't care," I tell him honestly, saying each word slowly so there's no mistake. "I'm not going to judge you on how you treated other girls. I'm going to judge you on how you've treated me." I smile at the way his dark eyes light up a little at my words. "And you've treated me with nothing but care and respect."
He smiles at me with liquid eyes and rests a hand on my hip. "I meant what I said in there," he says softly, so soft I almost wonder whether I heard right.
"Really?" I say, barely audible.
Gary nods. "I love spending time with you. I love the way your eyes get darker as the night sets in. I love the way you tell it like it is. I love the way you make me smile for no reason." He grins. "And I was thinking about this all, and I realised maybe I love you."
I lift an eyebrow, touched by his words but not wanting to show it. "Maybe?" I echo teasingly.
He returns the grin, placing his other hand on my other hip and pulling me towards him. "Maybe more than maybe," he concedes. He turns serious suddenly, his eyes going all dark and somber. I love it when they do that. "What about you?"
Wow. Loaded question.
I think about it before saying anything. "I love being with you and I love the way you make me feel. But we've only been dating for three weeks and a couple of weeks before that I was with Ash. So I'm taking my time. But," I say, with a small smile. "If this isn't love, it's very close."
"Thank You by The Whitlams," Gary says without skipping a beat, grinning. "You've got to get up pretty early in the morning to beat me at that game."
I punch him in the arm lightly. "There'll be plenty of time for getting up early in the morning later."
Gary raises his eyebrows suggestively and I laugh. Then I rest my head against his chest and sober. "It isn't going to be easy, you know," I say seriously. "There'll be people in our way."
Gary idly runs a hand up and down my back. "So we'll run them over with my car," he says lightly. "No sweat."
I laugh a little, but I'm still not at ease. And I guess Gary can tell because he pulls me away so he can look me in the eye.
"Hey," he says softly. "We'll make it work."
Warmed by this, I wrap my arms around his neck and just revel in his presence. There's a sense of calm that was never there with Ash.
As Gary holds me, I spy Ash watching us from the house over Gary's shoulder. I almost pull away, but then Ash smiles. It's hardly noticeable, but it's there.
He understands.
I smile back, to show him that I understand too.
Maybe Gary and Ash will never be best friends again, just like May and I will probably never be good friends. But the two most important guys in my life are the two most important guys in May's life and because of that we're all irrevocably linked.
It won't be easy. But I believe Gary.
We'll make it work.
I know we will.