Chapter 1: The Thunder Rolls

Lucas's steps grew softer as his silhouette slipped into the night. The thunder rolled off in the distance as the wind picked up and the first rain drops fell. Elizabeth leaned against her doorframe as her cream blouse became soaked with drops—but not tears. There were no tears and perhaps that spoke louder than the thunder.

It may be rumbling outside, but inside Elizabeth's heart there was a startling sense of…peace. It felt right—for once—to watch Lucas's back retreat into the abyss…swallowed up in the approaching storm.

And yet, the rumbling continued as her safety net dissolved and she was faced at last with the uncertainty rocking her own heart.

She knew.

And yet she couldn't face it.

The wind began to howl and Elizabeth retreated to the warmth of her home, shutting the door firmly behind her, and turning down the lamplight. Another chapter had ended.

Absentmindedly drifting to the settee, Elizabeth wrapped herself in a warm blanket. Her body slumped against the seat in defeat. A streak of lightning illuminated her sitting room as Elizabeth caught sight of her beloved photo of her husband Jack in his dress uniform.

His striking hazel eyes stared through the frame piercing Elizabeth's heart. She came undone giving in to the tears she had held back for so many years.

"Don't look at me like that Jack," Elizabeth sobbed with her knees drawn up to her chest. "I've made such a mess and I know you would know just what to do…. Why did you leave Jack?! Why are you not here with me ?! I need you! Jack needs you! Why did you have to go?"

Silence, but Jack stared on—a bastion of honor and strength. Strength that had seeped slowly from Elizabeth's life every day since she had laid him in the ground. Strength, it seemed, she had buried with him. Her Jack would hardly recognize the woman who sat shaking before him. She was lost in every way. More lost than she had even been as the Hamilton princess on the frontier. She was a shell of the woman she once was.

And she knew it. Deep down she knew she was a fraud walking Main Street dishing out advice she herself would not take—encouraging others to follow their heart and not give in to fear. Mere platitudes for herself on a handcrafted plaque. A gift that she pushed off to the corner of the library as it inadvertently nagged her about her failure to face her fears. Elizabeth was running from her truest self—foolishly clutching her ears to the call of her heart. And call it did. Constantly.

Red raced through her mind and her heart atop a chestnut horse if she would

just

reach

out

…but she wouldn't.

Thunder rattled the windows as the storm neared closer.

And the hazel eyes bored into hers with complete honesty and conviction as she withered under his gaze.

"I am not a goat Jack!" Elizabeth shouted in the dim lamplight completely forgetting her sleeping son just up the stairs. Her mind flashed to years ago meeting Billy Hamilton who was handsome and full of charm and yet deceptive to the core. He was a con-artist who gained her trust for his own selfish gain.

Lightning struck closer now illuminating more than just the room, but the recesses of her heart as well. Lucas flashed through her mind. Fool me twice. As the memories of candles, library dinners, coerced tickets, and habitually pushed boundaries flooded her thoughts. Light was flashing and pounding closer than ever.

"Ok fine! I am a goat Jack!" Elizabeth retorted to the silent frame. Thunder reverberated even to the floorboards now as Jack's frame shifted and fell back blankly staring at the ceiling.

Elizabeth gasped as she stepped forward and cradled the frame before righting it again on the tabletop. Gingerly, she caressed Jack's face tracing his jawline as the tears continued to stream down like the rain pounding against her windowpane. Her hand came to rest on the tabletop drawer and she resigned to open the drawer that she had kept locked for too many years. It was time.

Lightning streaked across the sky as Elizabeth's resolve strengthened and she opened the delicate wooden drawer.

Sitting neatly at the top—just as she had left it—was a single crisp white envelope with her name scrolled tenderly across the front. It was a letter Jack hoped she would never read, but it was left for this very purpose so that he could speak life and love into her broken heart even years past his death.

Promise me you will open your heart to find love again.

Thunder rumbled, but it seemed to underscore the weight of the request. With a shaking hand, Elizabeth clutched the letter to her chest and closed the empty drawer and locked it.

Yes Jack.

It was a whisper, but it was a promise— though she did not know where to even begin.

A whimper was heard from the top of the stairs as lightning illuminated Little Jack standing groggily in his wrinkled pajamas clutching his well-worn baby blanket in one hand.

"Mama?"

Elizabeth swiftly climbed up the stairs. "It's ok my sweet boy. It's just some thunder," she crooned as she scooped him into her arms dropping the blankie softly to the floor.

"You scared Mama?"

"No." Yes.

"Why you cry Mama?"

"I just miss your Papa. He helped me so much." Elizabeth answered while rubbing light circles on Jack's back as they descended the final step.

"No cry Mama. N'atan keep us safe. Right Mama?" Jack asked holding his mother's cheeks in his tiny hands.

"That's right baby. Shhhh. Mama has you." Elizabeth whispered as she lowered them into the rocking chair. She hummed a lullaby as she stroked Jack's downy hair as he relaxed against her chest.

As she rocked, the steady sound of rain mixed with the regular rhythm of the chair against the hardwood floor. Her thoughts returned to Jack Senior. He had missed so much. These quiet moments where a young boy needs the comfort of his parents. Jack had missed this. He would have held him right now. Truly, he would have held them both. And maybe he was holding them even now, but Elizabeth wasn't still enough to feel it.

So much had been warring within her that she had missed the quiet strength that resided within herself all along. It was that strength that attracted Jack to her in the first place after all.

The windows glowed in a flash as the storm rumbled further down the mountain. Elizabeth rocked slowly with Little Jack's chest gently rising and falling as he slumbered in the safety of his mother's arms.

It was incredible the resiliency of children. To startle awake, throw off the covers, and set out in the darkness alone searching out the one who can still the fear and rapid beating of their own heart. Not knowing where to begin, but beginning all the same because there is no comfort here… though the bed is warm. It holds no candle to the comfort and security of a mother's arms. The journey into the darkness is worth the risk. And for Jack, it paid off. His mother was there right when he needed her most as she gently rocked the storm from his mind returning him to a better comfort than his own bed could provide.

The rumbling now distant, Elizabeth kissed Jack's forehead. She held him closer to her chest breathing in the sweet scents of childhood and the gift Jack left behind.

They were not so different her son and herself. Shaken awake by her world crashing down. Where Jack woke with his focus solely on his mother, Elizabeth remained frozen as if still in bed clutching the proverbial bedsheets over her head and shouting at the storm instead of casting them off and running to the One who made her heart all right.

Truly she had been running long before she rode off from Nathan. Perhaps it was why she was drawn to Lucas after all. It was a sick sort of comfort they could provide each other—continuing to hide from reality. Lighting their world with candles in a hurricane. Foolishness. But it was merely a wet blanket. The charades had to grow larger and more elaborate as they lost their charm to the reality that kept creeping back in. They were running. This wasn't real and storms rage on—blanket or not.

For all his faults, Lucas had at least stepped out from this blanket they had created—essentially handing it back to her on her doorstep earlier tonight. But could she merely leave it behind as he did? It was just a blanket. A fool's protection. Truly.

Her real security actually lay not in a blanket, not in the charming charade of Lucas's company, not even in the warmth of her short marriage to Jack—as she cruelly learned a few years before. And as noble as he was, her strength didn't even reside in the sapphire depths of the man that had slowly and quietly stolen her heart. Her true strength was found in her Creator who had never left her and never would. The unchanging One. Only He could still this storm and bring her the rest and peace that evaded her for years in the darkness of her grief.

She too had to drop the blanket. And so in the quiet stillness of the night with just the flickering of a lamp and steady drizzle on the roof, Elizabeth bowed her head and silently prayed.

Lord, I have nothing left. I give you the control that I never really had. I've stopped hiding. I've stopped running. I'm here and I'm lost. Help me Lord as only You can. Thank you for the gift of sweet Jack here. Thank you for Rosemary and Bill. Thank you for Nathan and Allie. Help heal their hearts tonight even now as they sleep.

Help Lord.

Amen

The thunder distantly rumbled as matters settled within her own heart as Elizabeth glanced back to her table near the settee. Jack's envelope remained open and her letter laid before Jack's stoic frame.

"Ok Jack. I will, but I don't know the way."

—

A/N: Special thank you to Lynn nebula2 who helped me reshape my habitual run-ons and gave me encouragement to continue on. Thank you also to my author friend Velda for her encouragement and patience with my external-processing.

Easter eggs included in this chapter (for over-analyzers like me!):

"Another chapter had ended" is a snarky callback to WCTH commercials, "It's time for another chapter." No. I hate the chapter you wrote Hallmark. The chapter has ended. ;)

•Elizabeth subconsciously wraps herself in a blanket when she sits on the settee after Lucas leaves

•Little Jack drops his blanket on the stairs when he embraces his mom

•"I'm not a goat Jack!" Is a callback to season 1 when Jack calls Elizabeth a fool for falling for Billy Hamilton's charm and metaphorically implies she is the goat in his story. She yells back, "Are you calling me a goat?!"

**All characters and on-screen canon references are property of Crown Media**