She always hated this time of year. While everyone else seemed to love it, this Tony Award winning actress hated it. Yes, it's true everyone paid more money just to come see her, but that didn't matter.

All Shelby Corcoran cared about was her beautiful baby girl she had given birth to almost three years ago. The little girl she saw for only a few minutes. The little girl whose brown eyes bore into her green ones, as if they were to say 'I'm okay mommy' just to be whisked away and for Shelby to be left with nothing but a gaping hole in her heart.

She would be turning three this December, and it being the beginning of what they call the 'holiday season' otherwise known as 'Thanksgiving', one could say Shelby wasn't feeling all that thankful.

Sure, she made a name for herself on Broadway, had an extremely tight knit group of friends who knew about her baby girl, an expensive penthouse overlooking Central Park, but she has a hole in her heart. One that can't be filled without her baby. One that can't ever truly be filled for the next 15 years because of a stupid, stupid contract because she was naïve and she couldn't ask her parents for help.

Almost five years ago, her father was diagnosed with cancer and her parents were doing absolutely everything in their power to pay for his treatments while still raising their family. Shelby has three older siblings, two older brothers, one older sister and one little sister who at the time was still living with their parents.

Her older siblings were much older than she and her younger sister—they were already out of the house and starting their own families when Shelby and Lexie were still in school. Because of this, Shelby worked odd jobs to help pay her way through school, never wanting to ask her siblings for money or parents either because they were paying for her fathers treatments along with the cost of living for Lexie.

One day, she read about an ad in the paper—she saw the dollar amount and couldn't believe her eyes. This could help me pay for my dads treatment and get me two years in New York easily, she thought to herself. So that's what she did. She told her parents she was staying with a friend, and Shelby moved in with Hiram and Leroy Berry who doted on Shelby while she was pregnant. They paid for absolutely everything and after finding out why she was so willing, they even gave her more than what they said in the ad. Shelby tried to give the extra money back, but the Berry's refused because she gave them 'the best gift they could have ever asked for'.

That being said, what Shelby didn't realize is how she would feel during the pregnancy. The second she went to her first ultrasound, Shelby fell in love with the baby and knew there was no turning back. Yes, she had her dream of Broadway, but it fell on deaf ears when Hiram and Leroy would mention it to her and eventually they seemed to notice this. Around the time she was six months along, they had a contract drawn up and being so young and naïve, not to mention in the state she was in: fragile, alone, emotional, desperate to help her family especially her daddy, she signed it knowing she wouldn't be able to see her baby until the baby was 18 years old.

Shelby knew it was the biggest mistake of her life—but had no way to get out of it. She reverted into herself, shutting herself off from everyone. Once she had her precious baby girl, she wanted to make her proud. She paid for her fathers treatments stating she got an advancement for her new starting role in Rent, and shut herself off from the world focusing on her career going on to win Tony Award for her role in Wicked as Elphaba. She knew nobody understood her like her three best friends who she's made as either her roommates since coming to New York, or as her on stage fellow star. April Rhodes, Cassandra July, and Holly Holiday know about everything—and eventually, they gave her the courage to tell her family as well.

At first, Katherine Corcoran was beside herself with anger—than after speaking with her husband Thomas who was extremely grateful and sad at the same time, she calmed down. Shelby had always been the most independent of all her children. One of the youngest, but one of the most independent of the bunch.

Now at 24, she has more money than all the Corcoran's put together, paid for her husband and the father of her children to go into remission, and went through pregnancy alone along with the aftermath: essentially losing a child.

(Jeremy is the oldest at 37, Jacob (Jake) is 35, Addison (Addie) is 33, Shelby is 24, and Alexandra (Lexie) is 19)

Katherine always wondered why Shelby shut herself off from her family, but after almost a year and a half of doing so—Shelby along with three friends showed up in the middle of the night half carrying a distraught broken down crying Shelby into their living room in Columbus where she told them everything.

Now, it's almost that time again and Katherine feels herself breaking down even though she wasn't the one to essentially lose a child and can't imagine how her daughter must be handling everything. Yet, once again come this time of year, Shelby has shut everyone out and continues to work herself into the ground because she doesn't know what else to do to cope with her emotions.

As Shelby goes to leave her penthouse, she sees Joe and Mike her security details for this time of year—they have been assigned to her since she was announced for a Tony nominee and seem to appear whenever there's some type of drastic change—like right now. The holidays: just another reason to hate the season.

They both make eye contact with Shelby although she has to admit it's a bit strange because with the enormous sunglasses she has on, how would they know she's actually looking at them at all. That's why she loves these two. They never treat her any differently, they just treat her like a normal person and ignore all the screaming fans who want to chip away at her icy façade she likes to keep in place; she knows if it isn't there, especially on days like these, she will lose it and it won't be pretty.

"Coffee first?" Joe asks.

"Coffee first," Shelby confirms, but doesn't smile. Although Joe and Mike don't know her backstory, they do know with the seasons their boss changes and they have never once pressured her for information. For that, she's grateful.

April Rhodes is pitter pattering around her dressing room waiting for her best friend to arrive knowing today is a big deal. It's Thanksgiving, a 'huge show', more importantly a big day for Shelby who despises the holidays because she can't spend them with her baby.

Shelby has said many times, whether while breaking down in tears, a wee bit intoxicated, or in a fit of rage, 'until I have my baby back and in my arms, I have absolutely nothing to be god damn thankful for'! April, Cass, and Holly know this, the Corcoran's know this which is why they haven't called to wish her a 'Happy Thanksgiving' because there is nothing 'happy' about this day for Shelby.

Suddenly April is shocked from her thoughts by her best friends voice, "Are you going to get ready or not? Dress rehearsal starts in 45 minutes."

Instead of responding April just nods because she can see the circles under Shelby's eyes and knows she hasn't slept a wink and seeing her face really confirms it for the tiny blonde. April watches as Shelby closes her own dressing room door then does the same with hers then bursts into tears as she texts the other two blondes who call themselves the triple trouble blondes.

TTB: Shelbs looks likes she hasn't slept a wink in days : (

TTB: We're almost there, do you need us to bring anything? More coffee?

TTB: More like an IV drip…

TTB: We'll fix this, we always do.

TTB: Gotta go, duty calls. Love you both.

Cass and Holly just look at each other and frown knowing today sucks and there isn't anything they can do about it.

The show goes on without a hitch, Shelby's a perfectionist at it's finest and she'd never let her feelings interfere with her performance. But after the show, she knows something isn't right. She can just sense it. There's this pull, call her crazy but it's there. Shelby doesn't know how, what, or why, but it's there—all she knows is she WILL get to the bottom of this.

She wastes no time hopping into her shower and rinsing off all of the green—normally people love when she does the stage door but Shelby doesn't have it in her tonight to do it in green. Sure the character is great and all, but green, really? Do they understand the hours of makeup that goes into making a person green?

Al is working security by the door tonight and while some of the cast has come out, there are a bunch of other guards there so he isn't too concerned—especially because who everyone is truly out there waiting to see won't be out for another half hour or so. What does make his eyes go wide is an itty bitty baby who couldn't be more than a year old in a little onesie, sucking on a pacifier, a little pink giraffe dragging by her side with a note attached to her with a safety pin with no coat on.

Al has four children himself, and being a security guard he can already feel the hairs on the back of his head sticking up. Knowing he has time, he walks closer to the little girl—just before she steps out into the middle of the road where a cab could clip her, he grabs her and pulls the baby to his chest and snuggles her close.

"Hey there sweetie," he says softly, however all that seems to do is make her scream at the top of her lungs and boy does this baby have a set. He makes eye contact with another security guard who shrugs typical idiot he thinks to himself. He tries to bounce her but this little baby continues to wail. Eventually he takes the envelope that's pinned to her onesie off and reads the note that's attached.

This is Shelby Corcoran's kid, I don't want the thing anymore. All she does is cry…

But Al has read enough and he runs through the doors with this baby bundled up the best he could to protect her from the snow that has fallen that night. He sees the director David and for some odd reason but lucky for him, Katie who just happens to be Shelby's manager standing there talking to one another. They both turn hearing the screaming child and Al passes David the note who tells Katie to call the police and then meet them in Shelby's dressing room.

Katie, who is in her late 40's doesn't know what to think about all of this. She sees a very distraught little baby, two men who look very confused, and then they are asking for the police for Shelby?

Soon enough, there's a female police officer sitting with the baby who is still crying but isn't screaming like she was before while David and Katie are on their way to talk to Shelby. Katie has now seen the letter as well and has informed David that Shelby has a lawyer on hand, but doesn't know anymore than that.

Knock knock

"Come in" Shelby says, her voice now tired as she is from not only the show but the day she's had.

She expected Katie, but she didn't expect David. She knew it wasn't her best performance but she truly didn't think it was that bad.

"I'm sorry—" Shelby starts to say, her eyes already looking remorseful.

David cuts her off, "Shelby the show was wonderful, I'm here about a personal matter. Why don't we have a seat."

"Oh god, is it my family? I haven't even had the chance to turn on my phone yet. Did something happen to one of them?" Tears well in Shelby's eyes and David curses himself for starting the conversation this way.

"Shelby your family is fine. They are all healthy—I do have a question for you though. I'm sorry if it sounds insensitive, but we don't know each other all that well because you're a very private person and I respect that about you, truly I do. That being said, Shelby, have you ever had a baby?"

Those six words cut Shelby like a knife through her heart—today of all days, is this some sick type of joke? Shelby looked up to keep her tears at bay then looked back at her director. "Yes, I had a baby girl. She would be three in December, why? What's going on?"

David rubbed the back of his neck and then looked at the young woman in front of him, "There's no easy way to tell you this—tonight, Al was working the stage door and found a little girl roaming around. She had this attached to her little onesie." He handed her the note and watched the emotions on Shelby's face as she read through it.

This is Shelby Corcoran's kid, I don't want the thing anymore. All she does is cry. We found out on Leroy's deathbed when Rachel was two that HE was the biological father, I have no use for her. Have fun with it, I'm all set. I've already terminated my parental rights and you won't find me because I'm not coming back. That thing costs so much money and for what? It looks nothing like me, it's still in diapers, still wants the pacifier, god it wants the boob and I obviously don't have those. Stupid fucking thing you can keep it you've fucked up my life enough.

Shelby read the next page where there was the birth certificate stating her name was Rachel Barbra Corcoran, parents Shelby Elizabeth Corcoran and Leroy Matthew Berry. The next page terminated Hiram's parental rights however Shelby stopped reading she just looked up at Katie and asked, "Please get my lawyer here now," then looked at David, "Where is my baby? I need to see her."

There would be time for tears later, right now actress Shelby Corcoran needed to pull herself together for the sake of her baby girl. Her baby girl, the one who she didn't think she was able to meet until she was 18—she was in this building and Shelby was on a mission. Before David could even get out of Shelby's dressing room Shelby was searching high and low.

David called after Shelby letting them know where she could find them and that's exactly where Shelby took off running—she slowed down once she got closer and slowed down her heart rate but once she heard the crying, it broke her heart. Her baby girl was crying and nobody was comforting her. They better fucking move because momma bear is here and I'm a lot scarier than any damn fucking green witch.

The female officer finally moved out of the way and Shelby's breath hitched in her throat, she was finally seeing 'Rachel' her baby the baby she didn't know the name of for the first time since she had given birth listening to those wails and in between the wails was a broken plea of 'm-om-my'.

The officer stepped aside seeing Shelby and the brunette squatted down in front of her baby getting to properly see her for the first time, "Hi baby," Shelby said, tucking a piece of hair behind Rachel's ear and wiping her tears with the corner of the sweater she was wearing.

Rachel's gorgeous brown eyes made contact with her mothers green and she slowly stopped crying, with the occasional hiccup, "Mo-mm-y?" Rachel cocked her head.

Shelby scooped Rachel up in her arms and held her close not caring that she was in a dirty onesie, smelt like NYC, needed a bath, all she cared about was the fact that she was holding her baby girl in her arms. "Yeah baby, it's mommy. I've got you." Shelby pressed a kiss to the side of her head and swayed back and forth while humming feeling the baby getting heavier in her arms. "Mommy loves you so much, so, so much."

Shelby didn't realize she had gathered an audience as the mother and daughter had reunited, all she cared about was her baby girl was in her arms and she clearly needed to be calmed down—anything else could wait however, when she realized Rachel was asleep and turned her head she saw numerous pairs of eyes on her that weren't in the room before. Six pairs of eyes that belonged to three blondes that made up her best friends who all had tear streaming down their faces.

Shelby has never truly been shy or embarrassed about much in her life—I mean gosh with her job, where's the time to be embarrassed when you barely get yourself dressed? But right now she was a bit tongue tied. Detectives, the director, now her lawyer, her best friends, unfortunately CPS because it's mandatory, Al because he found Rachel, Joe and Mike.

"Umm guys," Shelby said, her voice already wavering. "I'd like to introduce you to my daughter Rachel however, it seems as if she's fallen asleep…" Nice one Shelby, a joke really?

Luckily it did the trick because everyone started to laugh which made Shelby feel a lot better. April, Cass and Holly were the first ones to walk over and honestly, it was because Cass and Holly were going to be the ones to run out and grab some essentials for little miss Rachel while April and Shelby stayed at the theatre and then made sure they got home alright. Katie may be her manager and doer of all, but it was nearing midnight which was much later that she normally worked and April told her 'hunny we've got it covered'.

It was evident by holding her daughter she was still in diapers but she already knew that because of the letter—April had been able to talk with Henry who was also her lawyer and weasel her way into reading only the letter that 'came' with Rachel and saw she was in diapers and guessing by her size, she was going to say everything was itty bitty small which she was a master at being small herself. She told her long time girlfriend Holly exactly what they needed, at least for essentials, then shooed them out of the room while April, the detectives, CPS, Henry and Shelby got to work on the paperwork.

By 12:15, it was declared that the paperwork was in-fact all in order and she could go home with her mommy. Shelby broke down into happy tears—she knew she felt different after this show, and know she knows why—her baby was here. This Thanksgiving, she truly had something to be thankful for.

In the car ride is when Shelby started to freak out, "Oh my god April, I have nothing for a baby. We need to stop, but I can't stop, I'll get recognized and I haven't put out a statement—what am I going to do? You'd get recognized too, and if you're in the baby isle people will think you're pregnant or something. Why did I send Katie home? I could have at least sent her to get diapers and a new onesie or somet—"

April literally put her hand over Shelby's mouth ending her ranting, "Are you done?" When Shelby nodded April smiled, "I sent Holly and Cass out, they already dropped everything off at your apartment. They've turned up the heat, they threw in a load of laundry so you can switch it over when you get there and if it isn't dry by the time you go to sleep put Rachel in one of your t-shirts or let her sleep in a diaper on your chest. She's a baby Shelbs, we will figure the rest out in the morning because right now Auntie April needs her sleep and my two favorite girls do too."

"God I love you!"

"And I love you too babe!" April said just as they pulled outside Shelby's building.

Shelby greeted Max her doorman who did a double take not just because of the time but because she was carrying a bundle of joy in her arms. Shelby gave him a look as to say 'we'll talk in the morning'.

When she was in the elevator watching it go up to the 25th floor, she couldn't stop staring at her sleeping beauty. She's all mine, I made this perfect, beautiful baby—my gosh, I can't believe I have her here with me, in my arms.

Shelby unlocked the door to her penthouse, put down her purse and then gently laid Rachel and the blanket she had been wrapped up in since they'd been at the theatre on the couch while she switched over the laundry. When she came back, Rachel was still sucking away on her pacifier and sleeping soundly but Shelby didn't want to risk her waking up in an unfamiliar location so she locked up, set the alarm and went upstairs and laid Rachel on the bed stripping her out of her dirty onesie throwing it right in the trashcan.

Rachel involuntarily shivered and Shelby waited for a minute before changing her diaper laying one of her t-shirts over her daughters tiny body to keep her warm. But Rachel did stir and those baby brown eyes met sparkling green all over again, "Mommy?"

"Yeah baby, it's me. Go back to sleep baby mommy's right here."

"Ubby you?" Rachel batted her eyelashes and cocked her little head again and Shelby knew she was done for. Whatever her little girl wanted she didn't care even if it was practically one in the morning—they had nowhere to be.

Ubby? What the hell…ubby? Uppy? "You want uppies?" Shelby asked, stroking Rachel's cheek gently and the baby shook her head.

"Ubby you?" she asked again.

Ubby…ubby, subby, lubby, tubby…ahh huh! "You want to take a tubby?"

"Wif mommy."

"Well okay then, let's get this tubby started then baby girl." She lifted Rachel up and set the baby on her hip, Rachel molded into her right away, resting on Shelby's shoulder while the brunette tested the water. Thankfully she loved taking bubble baths herself to help wash off all the extra green some days and added a bunch laughing as Rachel squealed in excitement. Leave it to her to get her baby riled up at 1am. Oops.

Once the claw foot bath was full enough, she stripped herself down then took off Rachel's diaper and settled in laying the baby on top of her. For the first time, in nearly three years, Shelby felt completely and utterly happy. Her heart felt full again. She had her baby back: literally.

Shelby had time to look in the bags while Rachel was asleep on the couch and found some tear free baby products which she had put in the bathroom so she was happy about those to help wash Rachel's hair seeing as she doesn't know what happened to her baby and why she was roaming the streets of NYC even if it were just for a few minutes, a hour, a few hours, a day, she can't fathom to think beyond that.

Right now, that's up to 'New York's Finest' to figure out—they'd be meeting with the detectives again tomorrow afternoon after Rachel's checkup but those aren't until later in the day as she knew they'd be getting in late and she wanted to cherish this time together.

She was so lost in thought until she felt her breasts being tapped on, looking down she saw Rachel staring at them almost as if she was trying to understand. She remembers the letter saying something along the line of 'she wants the boob' but Shelby herself didn't understand that part until right now while looking down at her daughter who looked so tiny on her chest staring at her boobs as if they were the most magical things in the world. I wonder if all babies do this? I wonder what our breastfeeding journey would have been like?

"Mommy what deez?" Rachel continued to pat her mothers breasts and Shelby couldn't hold back the laugh.

"Those are breasts baby," Shelby said in a factual way.

"Deez mine, otay?"

Shelby bit back her laugh this time, "Okay baby." Now that Rachel's hair and little body had been washed, Shelby decided it was time to get her out of the tubby for the night. "Let's get you all dried off and we can get tucked into bed and snuggle up together. How does that sound?"

Rachel nodded and went along with what her mommy said, she liked having a mommy. She didn't like having a daddy—she didn't remember having two daddies, only one and she didn't like him. He was mean and yelled all the time but her mommy was really nice and let her snuggle and gave her hugs and kisses.

Once diapered again, Shelby decided instead of going back downstairs, she realized any and all of her shirts would be way too big on her little baby and decided to forgo it for one night—she would keep her daughter plenty warm. A pair of panties and a t-shirt for herself later and they were both under the covers together with Rachel laying on top of her. Shelby reveled in the feeling of having her baby on top of her, it was something she's missed out of for the first almost three years of her life, and something she doesn't think will ever get old.

She could feel Rachel moving around trying to get herself comfortable and was waiting; Rachel seemed perfectly happy being in just a diaper so she knew it wasn't that so she passed her the pacifier which she quickly took but that didn't seem to get her calm enough. Once Rachel snuck her little arm up her mothers shirt and her hand was covering her mommy's booby, her breathing evened then out and she was out like a light. Shelby just shook her head—we will figure this out little one, you and me. But my oh my, do I love having you here in my arms.

Shelby wrapped her arms protectively around her daughter and they both drifted off into dreamland for the first time: together.