DISCLAIMER: I do not own Star Wars. The characters featured in this story remain the intellectual property of Disney Lucasfilm. I just enjoy torturing them.

SPOILER WARNING: This story takes place after the final battle in Episode 6 of the Obi-wan Kenobi series, and contains spoilers for the show.

Until We Die

—Chapter One—

The battle had been long, and filled with pain. A gruelling fight between former master and padawan. The dead, and the fallen. Brother against brother. Light versus dark. And after various wins and losses on both sides, the Light finally triumphed, and the Dark succumbed to defeat.

Yet, for both men... the fight had cost everything.

"Obi-wan!"

Slowly suffocating, his armoured body and life-support suit failing around him, Vader tried to walk forward... to follow his former Master.

But he was too weak. After two more shaky and unsteady steps, the Sith Lord fell and collapsed to his hands and knees. Lifting his shattered helmet, Vader stared blindly at the dark, dust covered terrain ahead, struggled to focus on the fading image of Obi-wan walking away in the distance—powerless to reach him.

His former master was abandoning him. Again.

Overcome with emotion, Vader forced himself to his knees. Then, drawing in as much air as he could... he reached out into the Force and bellowed at the very tops of his lungs:

"OBI-WAN!"

Obi-wan told himself not to look back. But it was hard. Hard hearing Anakin scream for him like that and to not go back for him. It was the second hardest thing he had done in his life—second only to Mustafar. He kept reminding himself: Anakin was dead. His brother and best friend... was DEAD.

Killed by Darth Vader.

But deep in his heart, he still couldn't believe it. He didn't want to believe it. There had been traces of Anakin present there when they'd spoken... hadn't there? Or had it just been his imagination? His heart telling his mind what he wanted to believe, as opposed to the agonising reality presented before him.

Reaching the small ship, Obi-wan dragged his heels up the ramp and made his way into the cockpit. Then, slumping heavily into the pilot's seat, dropped his head into his hands and succumbed to his grief. For that's exactly what this pain was—Grief. He was grieving the death of his brother and best friend, and struggling to come to terms with it.

Had struggled with it for ten long years already.

For all the Jedi had taught him through his training, perhaps their most inadequate of teachings had been on how to deal with powerful emotions. Their answer? To let go of everything you fear to lose. But you could never let go, not really. Yes, he'd faked it many times, battled silently on his own. But never truly "Let go". The sudden death of Qui-gon had been one of his most challenging trials, and it had taken all of his strength to battle on through it, especially being faced with the daunting task of training his "Chosen One" padawan. Anakin—so much as thinking his name still cut too raw—the very boy who would have been the one to replace Obi-wan should his Master have survived the fight with Darth Maul.

Something tugged on the edges of his awareness, and Obi-wan slowly opened his eyes, too scared to openly acknowledge the tremor. If it was Anakin reaching out to him, it would most assuredly shatter what little sanity he had left. He sighed and closed his eyes, concentrated on his breathing. Then the tug came again, considerably weaker than the last, and once more, he forced himself to ignore it.

But when the third tug came, more like a puff of wind or whisper, a sensation so weak that had he not been so attuned to the Force he would've missed it, he reached out.

And was too slow. The whispering tug vanished. Evaporated into the Force as if he'd simply imagined it. Perhaps he had imagined it. His mind had become rather adept at playing cruel tricks on him lately. Why should it stop now?

"Oh well, we may as well get going," he said to Lola, Leia's little droid still perched on the command console. If he was quick about it, he may just beat Leia back to Alderaan... if Haja had kept his word that is.

Firing up the engines, he quickly cycled through the pre-flight checks, then lifted off. For the first few hundred metres he flew low and swept the area as a precautionary measure, half expecting Anakin to swoop on him from out of nowhere. But after five or so minutes of being in the air, he soon realised he was alone.

Hands tight on the control stick, he contemplated heading straight for the moon's atmosphere... but again, hesitated. He should go. Leave here and head non-stop for Alderaan...

But some guilt stricken and grieving part of him wanted... no, needed... to see if Anakin had left yet. So, cursing himself for his foolishness, berating himself for his inability to let his former padawan go, he veered right and went about doing a flyby of where he'd seen Vader's shuttle.

Why?

Well, he didn't have an answer for that. A glutton for punishment perhaps? Or was it his inability to let go?

Inky black pinnacles dotted both the left and right of the viewscreen, and Obi-wan felt himself holding his breath as he approached the landing site.

A second later, he choked.

The tri-winged shuttle was still parked on the dirt. And the towering black figure of Vader was nowhere to be seen.

Obi-wan slowed his speed, ignited the ship's floodlights and begun scanning the area. He carried on flying low, retracing their battleground until he found the rock where he'd left him. Then, after a few long minutes, finally caught sight of a large dark shadow roughly ten metres from the rock.

Still, and unmoving. Lying prone on the ground.

He hadn't even made it back to his ship.

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Something a little different to my usual storylines. I thought I'd do a What if? story from the Obi-wan Kenobi series. Let me know what you think.

For those of you following the Carpe Tenebrae trilogy, yes I'm still writing it, but this little plot demon just refuses to go away. I don't foresee this one being a long story, and I don't know exactly how it's going to go, or how quick the updates will be, but I guess we'll find out.

Thank you for reading.

MTFBWY