PART 2
[South Park Elementary, day. Police cars are parked outside the school. Stan walks down the hallway past sad kids and police officers who are interviewing the teachers. He turns his head to see Bebe bawling and another girl comforting her who is also bawling. Stan then meets Kyle and Wendy]
STAN: Dude, what's going on? Wendy?
KYLE: You didn't hear?
STAN: Hear what? What happened?
WENDY: Heidi Turner. She... she quit Twitter.
STAN: [horrified] Oh no.
[Heidi walks past them, looking down]
KYLE: Yesterday after school, she wrote one last tweet that said goodbye forever, and then just- got off for good.
STAN: [still mortified over what he's heard, but decides to be optimistic about it] It's okay. I mean she'll get back on, right?
WENDY: No, she threw her phone in a river. She's... [tears begin forming in her eyes] she's gone.
STAN: Holy crap.
[The three kids see Butters walking past, crying over Heidi]
STAN: Butters? What's the matter?
BUTTERS: This was all my fault! She's gone forever! [runs away, still crying]
[At the South Park Elementary library, Mr. Mackey sits in front of a group of 4th graders to help them cope with their loss]
MACKEY: Alright students, I know we're all dealing with the loss of a good friend. We have to accept the fact that Heidi won't be on social media anymore. I know we're all gonna miss her, m'kay. We're gonna miss, seeing what she's up to; miss seeing her silly pictures she'd post of her and her friends, m'kay.
[Butters breaks down and starts crying; Clyde shifts over and gives him a sharp punch which does the trick]
MACKEY: But this is what can happen when someone gets bullied online to the point they just can't go on anymore.
[Kyle and Wendy angrily look over at Cartman]
MACKEY: I know that some of you are feeling anger, m'kay. Some of you are feeling a little guilt, asking how something like this can happen. But the best thing we can do for Heidi, is come together as friends, and as students, m'kay. So now, why don't we all get on Twitter, m'kay, and just tweet some of the, things we loved about Heidi, m'kay?
CRAIG: Dude, she's right- [sighs] Oh, never mind.
[Everyone takes out their phones and begin typing tweets on Twitter in memory of Heidi]
MACKEY: M'kay. Oh, that's nice, that's nice, m'kay. Oh, that's a good one Sarah, uh-huh. That-that's a - that's a pretty poem. Nice, Butters. Oh, Heidi would have loved this so much. This is so special, m'kay.
[Craig facepalms as he think it's completely stupid]
[At the South Park Elementary cafeteria, most girls are upset and the boys are eating at a table]
STAN: Okay. Can we all agree now, [Stan glares at Cartman] that whoever is doing this, needs to stop? [Cartman glares at him back]
KENNY: (Totally, you guys; this has gone far enough. The girls are really pissed off at us.)
STAN: So tonight, whoever is doing this, isn't going to do it again! 'Cause if he does, we're gonna have to do something about it!
CARTMAN: You hear that guys? It'd better not happen again tonight. I am so, seriously. [everyone just looks at him, unimpressed] Well, fuck you guys.
[Meanwhile at the girls' table, Wendy is trying to reason with the other girls, but they're still angry]
WENDY: Okay, guys. I know that you're all mad about all the harassment you're all receiving on the internet right now and that no one is doing anything about it, but for now, best thing to do is to just block, report and ignore it. I'm sure we'll all get to the bottom of it soon.
[No one answers]
WENDY: Well fine if you want to ignore me, but this is a time like this where you all need to stand up for yourselves, you all can't be the victims of this one troll forever you know.
[Still, no answer]
WENDY: You know what, forget it.
[We then move to another table where six other boys are sitting; Craig, Tweek, Clyde, Pip, Token and Jimmy]
JIMMY: Come on, f-f-fellas. It can't be that serious.
CRAIG: What do you mean "not that serious"? The girls are being trolled on the message boards, one of them has quit Twitter and they're now putting the blame on us!
TOKEN: You mean just Cartman?
CRAIG: No, I mean all of us! Because social media has warped their fragile little minds, they now think one particular group is to blame for everything for the actions of one! And don't forget what Stan once said; if this keeps on going, the girls will eventually declare war on us!
TWEEK: AGH! What?!
CLYDE: That's just stupid. There's no way the girls will try and terrorize all of us just because of this one guy trolling them online. Quit being so paranoid, Craig.
TOKEN: If you ask me, I think your newfound relationship with Tweek has made some of his traits rub off on you.
PIP: Hang on, you and Tweek were in a relationship?
CRAIG: For a while, yeah.
PIP: What happened?
CRAIG: Eh, we broke it off shortly after. Now with PC culture out of the window, we won't have to worry about the entire town thinking that we're gay anymore. I mean let's face it, Tweek and I are just friends; simple as that.
[Clyde, Token and Jimmy all glare at him]
CRAIG: What? We were never a couple to begin with.
CLYDE: Anyway, back on topic; why would you believe that girls would start an attack on us? We've had no involvement with the trolling!
JIMMY: Y-y-yeah.
PIP: Well, how about we put it this way, chaps; the war will likely never happen. Once the trolling dies down, the girls will see that none of us boys are responsible and would want to help.
CRAIG: Well it will happen if we don't do something, pronto! Pretty soon, the girls will do something really horrible towards us out of protest. They'll maybe break up with us and kick out whichever male relatives they have in this school. And you, Pip, might become homeless one day.
PIP: Oh, come on now.
CRAIG: I'm serious! Do you know what happens to a boy's heart when a girl leaves him?
[he takes a cookie and breaks it in half, startling Tweek in the process]
TWEEK: Oh, Jesus! Stop it, Craig, I can't take it!
CRAIG: Tweek! Tweek, calm down. I'm sure we'll think of a way to put an end to this so this never happens, okay?
CLYDE: Aw, isn't that sweet?
CRAIG: Shut it!
[South Park Elementary, hallway, few hours later. Two girls are talking to each other by their lockers when Craig, Clyde and Tweek arrive to confront them]
CRAIG: Hey girls, can I talk to you for a sec? [the two girls stop and look at him] Listen, I know you lot are in a really bad situation at the moment, but you have to stop blaming every boy here for what one person is doing, okay?
RED: Why would you care? It's been like a few weeks since the trolling began and you bastards haven't done a thing about it!
CRAIG: Oh, so what? When one person does something on the internet, it puts all of us boys in a bad light? How about instead of blindly listening to what Nelly has said about us, why don't you try and solve the problems yourselves? Don't put all of us in the wrong just because Cartman could be doing all of this crap!
CLYDE: Yeah, I had no idea about Skankhunt up until now!
ANNIE: But you reposted a picture of Heidi's mom with a dick in her mouth on Twitter!
CLYDE: Yeah, but so what? Sitting out the National Anthem isn't gonna help much, is it?
ANNIE: [offended] So?! That was what made her quit Twitter, jackass! We're in a painful place right now and you think it's a good idea to just make it into a big joke like the heartless trolling bastards you are?! To hell with all of you!
[She storms away with Red following behind, now Craig becomes offended]
CRAIG: Oh yeah?! Well we're sorry that we're actually trying to reason with you guys! Honestly, you girls are all just a bunch of condescending, inconsiderate jerks! Every single one of you!
TWEEK: Don't say that, Craig! What about-
CRAIG: Wendy? Yeah, I know. I'm sorry, I guess not every girl in this school is the same.
CLYDE: Yeah, but even so, I really wish this whole thing ends. A gender war would be the last thing I'd want in this town.
[Testaburger residence, night. Wendy and her parents are at the dinner table with the former lost in thought]
WENDY'S DAD: Honey, what's the matter? Don't you feel hungry?
WENDY: No. One of the girls in my school… had quit Twitter.
WENDY'S MOM: What? Why?
WENDY: It's because of that internet troll that's been harassing girls on the message boards, she just couldn't take the trolling anymore.
WENDY'S MOM: Wait, you mean Skankhunt42?
WENDY: You've heard about it?
WENDY'S MOM: Yes, we all heard about him at a parent meeting last night.
WENDY: Jesus Christ… you know, I think that troll could be Cartman, but the girls think the troll speaks for every boy here.
WENDY'S MOM: Well that's obviously not true! You should already know that not all boys are the same, Wendy!
WENDY: Yeah, yeah. I know, but I'm worried that things are just gonna get worse if this whole thing goes on.
WENDY'S MOM: Well my advice to you, Wendy, is to stay far away from Skankhunt42. The best thing to deal with a troll on the internet is to-
WENDY: Block and report? I know.
[Broflovski residence, night. Kyle is on his bed, lost in thought. Gerald enters Kyle's room]
GERALD: Hey Kyle. Can I talk to you?
KYLE: Huh, uh sure.
GERALD: You know, we had a big parent meeting at the school tonight, and uh, apparently, there's someone trolling the school message boards and, putting... penises in people's mouths. And whoever it was then got a big reaction from it, so he's now putting penises in people's mouths all over the internet. And... he's actually getting pretty famous!
KYLE: Oh my god…
GERALD: Sooo, Annie Jerkin's mother started an online campaign to stop internet trolling with a picture of her and her daughter, and you know what happened? She got a dick in her mouth!
[Kyle is horrified by this]
GERALD: Ha-okay, okay, I know, it's just guy humor stuff, you know. We can laugh about it here, but, it is serious too. Well, love you pal. Get to sleep, it's a school night.
KYLE: Yeah, yeah. Uh, see ya, dad.
[Gerald smiles at Kyle before leaving. In the hallway, Sheila encounters Gerald]
GERALD: Oh, hey!
SHEILA: Did you talk to him?
GERALD: Yeah, yeah, we talked. It was good.
SHEILA: Oh, that's good.
GERALD: Yeah, well, I'd better go and get some of my work done.
SHEILA: Alright. Night, Gerald.
GERALD: Night, sweetie. [Gerald receives a kiss from Sheila]
[Gerald then approaches Ike's room. Ike is playing Minecraft on his computer]
GERALD: Ike? You okay, buddy? Well um, I'll be in my office if you wanna talk.
Gerald's office. He goes in and closes the door, turns on Smokin' by Boston on his turntable and heads over to his computer, takes a seat, and pours himself some wine. He goes straight to Facebook and logs in. His user name? Skankhunt42. Once on the board, he gets to work with determination on his face. He breaks out in a mischievous smile while he's plugging away as he starts surfing on the media. Text boxes pop up as background impressions voice over them]
WOMAN: Hey! Just wanna remind everyone about the ice cream social to benefit homeless teens. Looking for volunteers.
GERALD: Hey, I'd like to volunteer to kick you in the vagina! Where do I sign up?!
[More surfing on Facebook]
WOMAN: This is my daughter at the triathlon today! Go little girl!
GERALD: Your daughter has a mustache - what the hell is wrong with your ovaries bitch?!
[The montage afterwards remains the same as it was in the original episode with woman and girls alike getting trolled overnight and are outraged by it. Meanwhile in Wendy's room, Wendy's phone starts flashing, waking her up. She looks at her phone which has several tweets from several girls on Twitter about the trolling, but is too sleepy to deal with them now. So she shuts off her phone and goes back to sleep. Finally, Gerald yawns and calls it a night, taking his glass of wine and leaving the room]
[South Park Elementary, day. At the playground, Wendy is busy talking to two other girls, Lola and Jenny Simons, when she overhears several other girls talking amongst themselves. She turns around and sees the girls gathering around and Nelly pacing back and forth, all with their phones with them]
BEBE: You should've seen what he said about my mother on her Instagram! Pages and pages of disgusting things!
[Wendy, concerned, leaves the two girls and begins walking up to the other girls]
RED: This is an attack on all of us! It's time to make the boys suffer!
NELLY: It has to be swift and serious. We have to make a statement. The girls in South Park aren't going to be treated like afterthoughts to her anymore!
GIRLS: Yeah!
ANNIE: This has gone on too long and it's time to do something!
GIRLS: Yeah!
[Wendy walks up to the crowd]
WENDY: What the hell are you girls on about now?!
BEBE: Skankhunt42 struck again last night and it's now time to get even.
WENDY: With who?
ANNIE: The boys! Every last one of them!
WENDY: What? Because they haven't found out about the troll's identity yet? [she thinks for a moment] You know what, I'll deal with this!
NELLY: Oh no you don't, Wendy! You've done far enough!
WENDY: I don't care! When something bad is about to happen, then it's time to take matters into my own hands! Things have to change for the better! Please, you've got to have faith in me for once!
BEBE: Okay then, Wendy. But you have to be quick about this!
NELLY: Remember, any more funny business and then the unthinkable will happen!
WENDY: Again, don't care.
[Wendy runs off away from the girls to warn the boys about their plans to take them down. She finds Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Butters on the far side of the playground, they've been overhearing what the girls were saying]
WENDY: You guys, we need to do something about this quick!
BUTTERS: What do you think they're talking about?
WENDY: Ugh! They're talking about how they're gonna get you guys - what do you think? That's how society works nowadays. You get blamed for the group you belong to, even if you did nothing wrong!
KYLE: So what do you think they're gonna do to us?
WENDY: I really don't know, but we've got to do something about this before it's too late!
STAN: Alright! Everyone come to my house after school, we need to think this through!
[Marsh residence, after school. The boys and Wendy are gathered in Stan's room and Stan paces back and forth]
BUTTERS: The girls are all gonna attack us!
WENDY: No! The girls only want to see Cartman punished so we have to prove it's him.
KYLE: We're never gonna prove that and you know it! We have to make him stop!
BUTTERS: He's not gonna stop, he's loving all this! He wants the girls to hurt us!
KENNY: (Then let's end it.)
WENDY: What do you mean?
KENNY: (Cartman is the cause of all our problems. Always. We all know what has to be done.)
[The kids look at Kenny with surprise and dread. Stan stops pacing]
KENNY: (It's not like we haven't talked about it before - fantasized about how we'd do it.)
KYLE: Yeah, but not like we'd actually do it.
STAN: Kenny's right.
KYLE: Stan… You can't be thinking that we'd-
STAN: What else do we do Kyle? You know better than anybody what a monster he is.
WENDY: He pushed everyone too far – boys and girls alike!
KENNY: (It's him, or us!)
BUTTERS: Are we seriously talking about doing this?
KYLE: How would we ever get away with it?
STAN: We- we do it out in the woods. I know how to get him to go.
[Cartman's house, Cartman is watching TV in the living room when the doorbell goes off]
CARTMAN: Mom? Mom, someone's at the door!
LIANE: That's nice, honey.
CARTMAN: Mom? Oh, goddamnit.
[he gets off the couch towards the door and opens it, he finds the boys and Wendy there, all looking down. Stan talks in an unenthusiastic tone.
CARTMAN: Oh, great. So, what do you guys want?
STAN: [after a brief pause] Hi, Cartman. Tonight, we're gonna go to my uncle's cabin - in the woods. We're gonna have a slumber party and play dead- I mean, Counter-Strike all night with no one around to bother us.
CARTMAN: Are you serious?! An all-night Counter-Strike party? That's fucking sweet! [then he rethinks about this] Wait a sec… This isn't some kind of trap, is it?
STAN: Um, well… No.
[Cartman shuts the door and goes back inside, only for Stan to ring the doorbell again. Cartman opens the door again]
CARTMAN: Hey, uh, does your uncle's cabin have good Wi-Fi?
STAN: No- I mean, yeah, but don't tell anyone where you're going. We don't want adults to know 'cause there's gonna be a ton of junk food.
CARTMAN: Sweet! Okay, count me in. Gimmie about… four more hours to get ready. [He shuts the door and goes back inside]
LIANE: Who was that, Eric?
CARTMAN: Um, it's just my friends, mom.
[Tweak residence. Mr. Tweak is at the dining room table when Tweek barges in, panicking more so than usual]
TWEEK: I can't do this anymore! I can't take it! This is just way too much pressure, man!
RICHARD: Tweek? Tweek, what's the matter?
TWEEK: Ngh! The girls! They said they're gonna get us and do something horrible to us for the trolling! Just like what Craig said! I just- I just want to end it all!
RICHARD: Tweek, come on, we've talked about this. You don't wanna quit Twitter, right?
TWEEK: Well, I… Why not?! Everyone would be happier if I did!
RICHARD: Who'd be happier?
TWEEK: The girls! They want to get rid of us!
RICHARD: Well, what about the Testaburgers' daughter, Wendy? How do you think she'd feel if you quit Twitter?
TWEEK: Uh… I don't think she'd even notice!
RICHARD: Of course she would. From what I've heard, she really cares a lot about you, Tweek. In fact, I think all your friends would be sad if you ever decide to quit Twitter.
TWEEK: [calms down and thinks it through] You mean like Craig, Pip and Clyde?
RICHARD: Yep, you've got so much ahead of you, son; so many posts and tweets still ahead of you. You haven't even started to see what social media has to offer you. You can't- you can't just end it all. Not now. Here, have some coffee.
TWEEK: You're right, I guess I don't want to quit Twitter.
[Tweek leaves the dining room, in thought]
RICHARD: They're so happy together, him and Craig.
[In the city, at a campaign-headquarters during the day, a supervisor is walking around]
MAN: Oh my god!
SUPERVISOR: [Walks to the man] What's wrong?
MAN: Someone keeps trolling our campaign site!
[The supervisor takes a closer look at the man's computer screen]
MAN: He just keeps leaving horrible comments, and now he's attacking me personally!
SUPERVISOR: Aww, don't let him get to you.
MAN: Don't let him-?! He took a picture I posted and put a dick in my mouth! Who does that?!
SUPERVISOR: Someone who probably still lives with his mother and hates himself. He obviously has nothing better to do. Just let him wallow in his own misery.
[At his house, during the day, Gerald leaves the house very cheerfully. Steal My Sunshine by Len starts playing as Gerald strides down the road. He cheerfully gets out of the way of a car after the driver honked]
DRIVER: Get out of the street, you idiot!
GERALD: Sorry! My bad!
[He nearly gets knocked over by a biker, but blissfully passes it off]
GERALD: Haha! Don't worry!
[At the supermarket, Gerald picks up a bottle of wine and happily skips to the checkout]
WOMAN: [To the cashier] I have a coupon for that too. An-and those are 6 for $4 with this coupon. [To Gerald] Sorry.
GERALD: Oh, no please. It's no problem at all!
[Craig's house, the living room. Some banging can be heard at the door, Craig answers it and it turns out to be Tweek]
TWEEK: I'm gonna do it! I'm gonna quit Twitter, I mean it this time!
CRAIG: Yeah, that's really nice, Tweek.
[he shuts the door, but the banging resumes and a frustrated Craig answers it]
CRAIG: What? What do you want, Tweek?
TWEEK: You don't understand! The girls were talking about how they're gonna put an end to all of us!
CRAIG: Oh, okay then. [he shuts the door, but quickly reopens it after hearing what Tweek said]
CRAIG: Wait, what? Girls?!
[In the woods the kids, who are still looking down and unenthusiastic, and Cartman, are trekking along a dirt path, bringing along their electronics]
CARTMAN: This is gonna be so awesome. Just hanging with you guys playing Counter-Strike all night. Alone in the woods - you pumped Kenny?
KENNY: (Huh? Uh, yeah. Sure.)
CARTMAN: I'm totally gonna do some massive pwnage. Whoever's on my team will be stoked. My laptop's so fast it doesn't lag at all. I can jump around like a pwnage powerhouse.
STAN: I'm sure you will.
CARTMAN: You guys all seem kinda, like, bummed out. Is everything cool?
STAN: Huh? Everything's fine Cartman. We'll just get there sooner if maybe we don't talk much.
CARTMAN: Okay, cool. Goin' a long way to play Counter-Strike. Guess it's sweet though there won't be any adults to screw it up for us. How much further now?
KYLE: We're almost there.
BUTTERS [whispers to Wendy] Are we gonna kill Eric?
WENDY: [quietly] If only.
[Butters stares at her, shocked]
WENDY: Uh, I mean- it's none of your business.
[Moments later, they arrive at the cabin]
CARTMAN: Oh, dude, is this it? This is cool. So isolated. Check it out, there's a shovel next to a hole dug in the ground. Wait a second, this is a trap, isn't it?
[The other kids remain silent]
CARTMAN: Guys? Are you hiding something? Huh, never mind.
[Inside the cabin, Cartman suspiciously goes over to the table at the far end and puts his items on it, while the kids form behind him]
CARTMAN: Dude, is this where we're gonna play? I call dibs on this side! What's the Wi-Fi called? Is there a password?
[The boys and Wendy remain silent. Kyle closes the cabin door. Everybody takes out a weapon, except for Cartman]
CARTMAN: I don't see it - I don't see it coming up on my laptop. I don't know, I think maybe the WIFI's not working. Where's the box? [turns around to see the kids gathering around him] Okay, what the fuck is going on right now? Stan, where's the WI-FI? Have you got something to say about this, Wendy? Kyle? Goddamnit, can anyone just fucking say something right now?
[Without thinking, Butters springs into action and whacks Cartman over the head with a baseball bat]
CARTMAN: Argh! Fuck you Butters, you son of a bitch… [he falls unconscious and the screen turns to black]
[Moments later, Cartman wakes up to find himself tied up to a chair]
CARTMAN: Huh? What the?! What the fuck is this?! What is the meaning of this?! I wanna know right now, goddamnit! Anybody?!
KYLE: Your time is finally up, fatass.
CARTMAN: Ha! I knew you were up to something, you sneaky jew!
[Kyle kicks Cartman's chair which shuts him up immediately]
CARTMAN: Ow!
STAN: The girls are gonna do something drastic to us. We have to take matters into our own hands.
CARTMAN: What are you...What are you guys talking about- What… Wendy have you got something to do with this?! Bitch?!
WENDY: You brought this on yourself, Cartman. We're sorry. And by mean sorry, I mean sorry for everything you've put us through!
CARTMAN: Oh no! Nononononono! I fucking knew this was a trap! You guys are gonna break all my stuff so I can't get online! I'M NOT THE TROLL GODDAMNIT! UNTIE ME RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME!
WENDY: Shut up! [she kicks Cartman's chair]
CARTMAN: Oof! Fuck! I swear. I swear to god, guys! If you break all my stuff, I will seriously murder you guys!
KYLE: Well tough luck, asshole! You're already tied up to that chair!
CARTMAN: Please! Please don't break my stuff you guys! This is like, 2 Christmases and a birthday worth of stuff! You guys can't do this! Please!
KENNY: (Let's just get this over with!)
CARTMAN: [starts struggling furiously, causing his chair to shake violently] No, don't-get-it-over-with! Don't break my stuff! I'm not SkankHunt, I'm not! You guys, you guys, you don't have to do this! You-don't-have-to-do-this! We can still just play Counter-Strike, and forget everything! Oh-my-God, there's no Wi-Fi - We can use my phone, to make a hotspot and we can still play Counter-Strike! And it'll be sweet! You guys, come on, please! Please, you can't!
WENDY: I can't listen to this. [she walks up to Cartman and gives him a sharp punch up the lower jaw]
CARTMAN: GAH! Please, Butters! Butters, you're my friend! Please, y-you know how much- I- need- my- stuff!
BUTTERS: I'm sorry Eric, but I'm done listening to your bullcrap!
WENDY: Fuck this! Let's just get it over with! [walks up to Cartman's electronics]
CARTMAN: Wendy?! Wendy, no! No please! If I can't get online, I won't-how would I- GET AWAY FOR THERE, YOU DIRTY, BERET-WEARING WHORE!
[Wendy stabs Cartman's laptop with her knife. The boys start advancing forward]
CARTMAN: [frantic] No, God! No! Don't! Don't! Don't! Oh my God!
[Cartman's electronics are subsequently destroyed by the boys and Wendy. The scene cuts to the exterior of the cabin as we hear more screaming from Cartman until it cuts to black once more]
[Outside the cabin after some time, the hole is filled up, and Stan pats the soil with the shovel. The kids look horrified]
BUTTERS: What have we done?
WENDY: What we have to do. Come on.
[the kids leave while moments later, Cartman, finally freed from the chair, runs up and desperately digs up his smashed electronics]
CARTMAN: No! Nonononono! No! [cries] Ohhh, what have they done to you? Oh, oh, Jesus Christ. [he then becomes enraged] No. No they can't do this to me! Stan! Kyle! W-Wendy! I'll get them back! I swear, I swear to god! I'll fucking murder you guys! Seriously!
[Testaburger residence, night. Wendy returns home late, a very stoic look on her face]
WENDY'S MOM: [notices her] Wendy? Wendy, where have you been? It's getting late.
[Wendy, however, remains quiet and walks up to her room]
WENDY'S MOM: Wendy, what's the matter? Wendy?
[Later, Wendy is asleep in her room when suddenly, her phone goes off]
WENDY: Goddamnit, why did it have to be now? [she picks up her phone and answers it] Hello?
[Tweek is on his phone while on his bed, grabbing onto a pillow]
TWEEK: W-Wendy? Is that you? I swear to God, I'm gonna do it this time.
WENDY: Do what? Tweek?
TWEEK: Quit Twitter, it's freaking me out right now. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
WENDY: Tweek, calm down already. Look, you don't have to quit Twitter, we've already got rid of Cartman.
TWEEK: Why does it matter? People would be happier if I just did it!
WENDY: Tweek, no one's gonna be happier, alright?
TWEEK: I-I talked to my dad. He said, "I don't have the guts to do it!". Well, if I'd quit Twitter, he'd be sorry! I just feel like I'm at the edge of a cliff, you know, and being chased by hate. And the only way out is to jump! I keep thinking about what the kids at school would do, when they find out I left all my social media. Like they would finally see all the damage they've done.
WENDY: Tweek, I would love to discuss about this more, but right now it's getting late and I really need my sleep. Let's see how you feel in the morning.
[she hangs up and goes back to sleep]
[At home, at night, Gerald is again trolling online with Smokin' by Boston playing. However, just before leaving, his computer screen lights up with a Google alert, notifying Gerald that he was mentioned on CNN. Gerald clicks on the video link]
CNN reporter: Another internet troll is wreaking havoc on message boards, this time attacking a Danish website for women with breast cancer.
GERALD: I made the news…
CNN reporter: The troll, who goes by the name "SkankHunt42",
GERALD: Yes!
CNN reporter: ...caused the website to temporarily shutdown. Danish Olympic Gold Medalist Freja Ollegard, who started the website, spoke out about the incident. [The inset video of Freja Ollegard zooms in]
FREJA OLLEGARD: I am not shocked. I am not sad. I am not giving this pitiful person the satisfaction of being anything. [Gerald listens intently]
FREJA: This little troll can have his fun. I am going to be the bigger person. I am going to show the people of Denmark are not so easily broken down.
GERALD: Hmm... Game on whore. Game on.
[Gerald starts furiously typing on his computer, and a shadow appears on his wall by the computer screen's illumination]
[At South Park Elementary the next day, Wendy walks through the hallway again, but this time the girls are angrily slamming their lockers before walking away]
WENDY: Hey guys, problem… [another girl slams her locker] solved? [she notices Annie] Hey Annie, we've finally taken down-
ANNIE: Fuck off, Wendy!
[Wendy, confused, meets up with Stan and Kyle again]
WENDY: What's the matter now?
STAN: You didn't hear?
WENDY: Hear what?
STAN: The troll, SkankHunt, Wendy. He was all over the internet last night!
WENDY: W- huh? No, that's impossible!
KYLE: It's true, dude! It wasn't him! We took Cartman out for no reason. [Cartman walks past looking down, a vengeful look on his face] We can't undo what we've done.
WENDY: Oh my God. Oh my God... Then that means…
[Then they overhear Tweek panicking in another part of the hallway]
TWEEK: AGH! It's over! It's over, man!
WENDY: Tweek?
TWEEK: I can't take this anymore! I've talked to anyone who would listen, they kept telling me that I'll be fine, but nothing's working! Now, the girls are sure to end us once and for all, and there's only one other option now!
KYLE: Quit Twitter? Dude, go for it!
TWEEK: I should?
KYLE: Yeah! Just deactivate your account so you can stop having a panic attack over it!
TWEEK: But what about-
WENDY: It's okay, I'll be fine, Tweek. Everyone will. But right now, we have other things to panic about now.
[Lola's house. Wendy rushes up to the door and rings the doorbell. Lola soon answers it]
LOLA: Wendy?
WENDY: Lola! Do you know where the other girls are?
LOLA: What do you mean?
WENDY: We all took down Cartman last night, but it turned out it wasn't him! I need to get the message across before they really turn things over.
LOLA: Well, I did recall them saying to meet over at Bebe's house to finally put an end to the boys once and for all.
WENDY: What?
[Inside Bebe's room, the girls are gathered]
NELLY: The time has come. We said if the trolling didn't stop, there would be severe consequences. Get the word out to every girl in school. It goes down tomorrow!
BEBE: [concerned] Uh, actually. I don't think I can go through with this, you guys.
NELLY: Bebe, shut up! Every girl needs to be a part in this, or are you just too chicken-
[Suddenly, Wendy kicks the door open and runs inside. The girls are all surprised to see her]
WENDY: You guys, stop! It wasn't Cartman!
BEBE: How do you know?
WENDY: Last night, me and the boys lured Cartman into the woods, tied him up and smashed all his stuff. That was it, things aren't what we thought!
NELLY: No… they're even worse. If it's not Cartman, then it's one of the other boys. It means the troll does this at night and is totally normal by day. It's even more insulting! No one can be spared! They're gonna suffer like we did, no matter what the risk!
WENDY: Oh come on now, this is getting ridiculous! Have you guys ever heard of something know as common sense?
ESTHER: Shut up, Wendy! We all have to be on-board! Every girl in school, or it means nothing.
WENDY: You're just gonna make things worse-
ANNIE: Don't forget what Nelly said, Wendy: "For too long girls here have taken the backseat! Things have to change!". Now they'll have to listen.
WENDY: NO!
[The girls all look at her, stunned]
WENDY: I am not taking part in this crap! You really that is gonna support our gender rights?! You're all fucking crazy! You know, I've seen a lot of people do some really retarded stuff over the years, but this one really takes the cake! Just because what one troll has put on the internet, that does not mean it speaks for all the boys! Of course you've been treated like afterthoughts for too long because you lot haven't done anything to make one change! I've been supporting woman's rights since day one and not once have I thought about shaming and attacking the opposite sex for something completely out of their control!
NELLY: That's the thing, Miss Feminist! For too long, we've all been taking the backseat to you! Forever until now, it'd always been Wendy this and Wendy that! How everyone loved and respected you for being class president and getting straight A's and your political beliefs about world issues and gender equality, while the rest of us get left in the dust! We've had it! Now, we take matters into our own hands and there's nothing you can do about it, so there!
GIRLS: Yeah!
BEBE: Uh, yeah.
WENDY: No! The real problem with this is that you girls have been on the internet for so long, it's slowly warped your minds from the inside! I don't know what you're going to do or what your plan is, but I am never, ever joining in your ridiculous crap anymore! You got that? You can protest against the boys all you like, but I've had enough!
[She leaves Bebe's room, while the girls all look at her with disgust while Bebe still looks unsure]
NELLY: Well, fuck you Wendy! You're nothing but a traitor to your own kind!
[At South Park Elementary, the following day. Annie hides behind some hallway lockers till her boyfriend passes by. She catches up and gives a note to him, then leaves. The note reads: "I'm breaking up with you forever. Annie.". The boy falls to his knees, drops the note and yells as tears stream down his cheeks. Kevin receives a note too from Red, as well as all the boys with girlfriends. Girls run down the hallway holding notes like a deadly mob. The montage goes on how it did in the original, except Butters is the one looking at a picture of Cartman fading away in the playground instead of Kyle. In the hallway, any boys are crying in corners, notes strewn and crumpled. Stan walks down the hallway, glancing at the boys before encountering Wendy. Wendy regrettably holds out the note in her hand. Stan hesitantly takes the note, and reads: "Meet me at the playground outside, we need to have some time alone together. Wendy" The two kids then walk away from the hallway and to the playground]
[Playground. Stan and Wendy are sitting on the steps of the school building alongside Kyle, Kenny and Butters. All looking forlorn and devastated about what happened]
STAN: Wendy, I'm… I'm so sorry.
[Wendy looks at him, perplexed]
STAN: You girls were the ones being trolled on the internet, and we've done very little to deal with it. Now look where it's left us.
WENDY: No, you don't have to be sorry, Stan. I never wanted to go with their plans anyway. Blaming every male person in school because of the actions of Cartman? That's just so stupid.
BUTTERS: And you happened to be the biggest feminist in this school, huh?
WENDY: Well, more like the only girl in this town who knows what gender equality is. I really don't know what happened? I always thought Cartman was the troll.
KYLE: Dude, we all thought it was Cartman, everyone here did! After everything that he's done over the years, it was possible. But it turned out that it wasn't him all along.
KENNY: (Well, I guess we can do nothing to stop this now. Let's face it, guys; we're already screwed. The girls have overpowered us, and there's nothing we boys can do about it. We're hopeless.)
BUTTERS: Come on, Kenny, don't be like that! The girls hate us now, but so what? At least we tried. I'm sure there's another way to put a stop to all of this, fellas. I just hope no one finds out what we've done.
[South Park Elementary hallway, Wendy stands at her locker, looking forlorn. Still feeling guilt about taking down Cartman for nothing. Mr. Mackey arrives behind her]
MACKEY: Uh, Wendy?
WENDY: [startled] AGH! Fuck!
MACKEY: Need you in my office now, m'kay.
[Mr. Mackey leaves the hallway with Wendy following her]
[Mr. Mackey's office. Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Butters are also there with Wendy]
MACKEY: M'kay, kids. Now I don't know what has been happening the last few days, but I've just had enough of playing games, m'kay. The five of you were good friends with Eric Cartman, and yet none of you seem to know why he left social media.
KENNY: (But we all fucking hated him-)
[Kyle reaches out his arm to keep Kenny quiet]
STAN: Um, we don't know either. I guess he just couldn't take the stress anymore.
MACKEY: I see, m'kay. Well I have a theory. I think... that Eric Cartman... was somehow forced to leave social media as a retaliation for Heidi Turner quitting social media! Because now of the actions of one sexist, bigoted, racist troll! [sweeps his hand across his desk and knocks a stack of papers to the floor. The five kids are shocked by his sudden outburst. Mr. Mackey realizes this and quickly recomposes himself]
MACKEY: Uh, we have a gender war on our hands, m'kay! And if we don't get to the bottom of it... there's gonna be more students like Eric... wandering the hallways with no connection to the rest of the world. M'kay?
WENDY: What do you mean? We have other things to worry about besides Cartman!
BUTTERS: But we smashed his-
[Stan covers Butters' mouth with his hand]
STAN: Butters, shut up.
[Meanwhile, Gerald is watching Simply Heidi on his computer. Her guest is Freja Ollegard]
SIMPLY HEIDI: We are back again with the brave Olympic gold medalist from Denmark, Freja Øllengård. Freja, you've talked about being trolled on the Internet and its consequences.
FREJA: Yes, Heidi. I believe trolling has a tragic effect on innocent people.
SIMPLY HEIDI: You have been the victim of horrific degrading attacks, spearheaded by a troll called Skankhunt42.
GERALD: Nice.
FREJA: I've tried to just ignore the trolls, but that only seems to make them attack me more.
SIMPLY HEIDI: It must be so awful for you to create a website for women like yourself who are breast-cancer survivors and these... monsters get on and somehow make light of it. Even going as far as... ridiculing mastectomies.
FREJA: Yes, it's very disgusting, but I still try very hard to believe in the goodness of humanity.
[Cheers from the studio audience]
SIMPLY HEIDI: I can tell you that the support for you on our website has been overwhelming. We'd like to share some comments we've received, many from doctors who believe your website is saving lives. The first is a comment from a physician in Spain: "You go girl. You are doing great things. Don't let trolling stop you." And that is from Dr. Juerdior Titsgo, in Spain.
[Freja is alarmed at the name]
GERALD: He shoots, he scores!
[Freja knows she's been trolled again and puts her face in her palm]
SIMPLY HEIDI: And there's this one: "Believe in yourself and don't listen to the haters. You're an inspiration." That's from Hungarian physician Dr. Cootsier Boobsoff.
AUDIENCE MEMBER: Oh no…
GERALD: HA! From the three-point line!
SIMPLY HEIDI: I'm sorry, am I missing something?
[The Broflovski house, day. Police cars are in front and a couple of officers are at the door. Officer Barkley rings the bell]
GERALD: Oh! Police! [sheepishly] Yes?
OFFICER: Hello, sir, we're conducting an investigation.
GERALD: Uh... regarding... uh, regarding what?
BARKLEY: Do you happen to know this child?[shows him Cartman's picture from Photo Day]
GERALD: [relieved] Hoooh. Sure, that's one of my son's friends.
BARKLEY: Well, I'm afraid he's... quit Twitter.
GERALD: Hooo... another one, huh?
BARKLEY: Yeah, but this one's different. The events surrounding his quitting Twitter were very suspicious. Most people that quit Twitter leave at least three paragraphs stating that they're quitting Twitter before they quit Twitter. This child just stopped using it.
GERALD: Kyle! [looks up the stairs]
BARKLEY: We're simply trying to gather information on whether this was a Twitter suicide or a Twitter homicide.
[Kyle appears at the top of the stairs]
GERALD: Kyle, have you seen your friend Eric online?
KYLE: [panics a bit] No. Uh, he quit.
BARKLEY: D'ya happen to know why, son?
KYLE: He probably got fed up with all the negativity and decided to end it. [shrugs] I don't know.
BARKLEY: Without tweeting a goodbye? People don't just quit social media. They post long drawn-out messages on social media, explaining why they're leaving social media.
GERALD: Look, officers, why don't you just go ask him why he quit Twitter?
BARKLEY: At where, sir? At where?
[Kyle's room, moments later. Kyle runs in and closes the door frantically, then whips out his phone to talk to some people]
KYLE: Okay, that was the cops! The cops were here!
STAN: The cops? For what?
WENDY: You know for what! You know what we did to Cartman!
KENNY: (But we had to do it, no?)
KYLE: But we were wrong!
BUTTERS: [under his bed covers] It's not the police we have to worry about, it's Eric. He's gonna get us.
KENNY: (Hey. We all just have to stay cool, okay? At least we can actually get some quiet now.)
BUTTERS: It doesn't matter. He's comin'. He's comin' to get us.
[Cartman's house, meanwhile. Cartman is sitting on the floor in his room with a unhinged, but silent look on his face. The room is completely dark, except for a candle that he had lit]
LIANE: [enters the room] Eric? Sweetie, you can't just stay in your room all day with the lights turned off. It's not healthy for you. [Cartman doesn't answer] Eric?
CARTMAN: [in a quiet, grovelly voice] W-what happened, mom? I tried to warn them. I tried to warn them, and they didn't listen to me… they never do. And now, they did it. They've fucking did it, mom.
LIANE: Oh, well, erm. Let's see how you feel in the morning, dear.
[She leaves the room]
CARTMAN: I'll get them back. I'll get them back, I swear!
TO BE CONTINUED…