"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! YOU KNOW HIM FROM HIS SHORT-LIVED SOLO COMIC... AND THE LONGER-LIVED COMIC WHERE HE HUNG OUT WITH RICHIE RICH... NOW HERE HE IS! HE'S JUST TEN AND A HALF AND A HOOT AND A HALF..."

(Pause while the announcer winced, took a deep breath, and forced himself to go on.)

"THE KID COMIC FROM THE KIDDIE COMICS, THE HILARIOUS JACKIE JOKERS!"

A little kid in a black velvet tuxedo and matching hair bounded out on stage.

"Hey-yo!"

He held out the mic toward the audience. Confused silence. He looked annoyed and tried again.

"Hey-yo!"

Now they got it. They were supposed to shout "Hey-yo!" back. They did so.

"Hey! Well! Kinda a rough start but we're gettin' into the swing of things now! I'm Jackie Jokers, the only comedian out there cuter than Patton Oswalt!"

Half-dozing in the audience, Oswald suddenly perked up. "Hah?"

"Oswalt," Orla told him. "He referred to the comedian Patton Oswalt. I believe he provided the voice for a cartoon rat in a motion picture who aspired to be a gourmet chef."

"That was a movie?" Omar shook his head. "I thought I dreamed that."

Jackie Jokers continued his monologue.

"So, yeah. I'm a close, personal friend of the world-famous Richie Rich, the Poor Little Rich Boy! Spend a LOT of time up at his mansion. How about that Richie Rich, folks? He's so rich, the Kardashians have to keep up with him!"

Osmerelda looked over. "Was that a joke?"

Orla nodded. "I believe it was intended as such, yes. We should laugh so he does not feel bad."

They chuckled politely. Encouraged, Jackie went on.

"Yep, that's my pal, Richie! Only kid in the world so rich he has an unlisted bedtime!"

From the back of the auditorium: "EEEEHAHAHAHAHAH!"

Everyone turned to stare at Todd.

"What? It's just how I laugh!"

Joshua the stage manager entered. Seeing Todd, he strolled over and ruffled his hair.

"Hey, little fella!"

Todd hissed and glared at him.

Joshua continued over and sat down with the OSMU agents, grinning. "Oh, he HATES that! How's things going? Any oddness?"

Orla sighed. "No. Only this... person."

Jackie continued his act. "Richie's a good guy, though. Why, he'd sell you the shirt off his back! But anyway, how's the food here? Gotta be better than the food I had on my last flight. Why, I tell ya, that food was so bad, we were taking bets on whether the heartburn would get us before the acid indigestion!"

Oswald winced. "Well, at least the Captain seems to like it..."

True. Captain Stubing was visible at a corner table, apparently genuinely enjoying himself.

"How much wine has he had anyway?"

"Maybe he's listening to football or something on his ear-buds..." theorized Omar.

"And now," Jackie adjusted his microphone. "I'd like to do a song I'm told means a lot to the Pacific Princess and its crew..." He cued the band. "Love... Exciting and new... Come aboard... We're expecting you..."

Osmerelda's badge-phone, which she had courteously set to 'Vibrate', went off. She answered it.

"Back in a sec, guys!" She excused herself and hurried out of the auditorium.

#

And downstairs, a sinister, mad-eyed figure in a bizarre crazy-quilt suit crept through the shadows toward the room where Inspector Clouseau guarded the mysterious and mischievous death whistles of Huehuecoyotl.

"This is utterly perfect!" The Shape-Shifter smirked, glancing up at the camera recording her as Odd Todd jimmying open the door with a crowbar. "There's literally no way I can lose!"

"OH, REALLY?"

The lights came on, catching the villain by surprise. The Little O stood there, arms crossed, gadget in hand.

"Oh no!" Shape-Shifter exclaimed, dropping the crowbar and struggling to look chagrined. "I, Odd Todd, have been caught in the act of attempting to steal the magic whistles! My image as a successfully reformed former villain has been completely destroyed! My life is now in tatters and I shall be hunted by Odd Squad for the rest of my days! Oh, what will become of me?"

Little O sighed. "Uh, you do know Todd is upstairs watching the show, surrounded by literally dozens of witnesses, including the Odd Squad Mobile Unit themselves, right?"

Little O pointed the gadget and fired, turning the Shape-Shifter back into her usual form. The villain grimaced in fury.

"AARGH! I should have realized that!"

"Yeah," Little O nodded. "You should have. In fact, I'm astonished you didn't. What's wrong with you?"

"I was distracted!" Shape-Shifter admitted. "On the other hand, since I don't have to pretend I'm Todd anymore, I can use my powers to escape!"

She started to strike a pose. Before she could shape-shift, however, Little O produced another gadget.

"Bubblinator!"

She fired. Suddenly, Shape-Shifter found herself inside an enormous, unbreakable bubble.

"Whuh... Whah...?"

She transformed into a bird but the bird was unable to fly away, sealed inside the bubble. Hissing with frustration, she transformed into a gorilla and tried to batter her way out, then into a jaguar to claw her way out. Nothing worked. She was trapped. She switched back to human form.

"It... It's not fair!"

Little O gestured. "Agent Oompas, take her away!"

At her command, little agents with orange faces and green hair emerged from the darkness to surround the Shape-Shifter's bubble.

"Oompa-loompa-dooppity-do

I've got another riddle for you

Oompa-loompa-dooppity-dee

If you are wise, you'll listen to me

What do get with a villain who's... ODD

Posing as others like a big... FRAUD

What does she hope to get out of her... CRIMES

Odd Squad just stops her every last time!

(And she gets in trouble!)"

The Oompa-Loompas clustered around the bubble and started rolling it toward the door. Inside, the Shape-Shifter had to run to keep from losing her footing and falling down.

"H-H-Hey! Watch it, you little... Hey!"

"Oompa-Loompa-dooppity-dah

If you're not evil, you will go far

You will live in happiness too

Like the Oompa-Loompas doopity-do!"

"You'll hear from my stalker about this!"

The Little O followed them out of the room.

Nearby, Ohlm and Olizabeth watched.

"Perfect! Now's our chance!"

#

Back at the auditorium, Gladys Kravitz shifted uncomfortably in her seat while Jackie Jokers sang and her husband dozed

"I don't know, Abner. He doesn't really..."

A little freckle-faced boy turned in his seat and fixed her with a wet, purple gaze.

"Don't make any noise when the music's playin'," he said with quiet menace. "I don't like any noise when the music's playin'."

Then their ashtray exploded.

Abner started awake. "WHA... Huh... Oh. This is still going on..." He drifted off to sleep again.

Gladys looked from the boy, who'd turned around again, to the shards of the broken ashtray and back.

"Oooo..."

#

Meanwhile, up on deck, Osmerelda hurried over to Isaac the bartender.

"What seems to be the trouble, sir?"

Sighing, Isaac wordlessly pointed at a conga line of nattily dressed kids dancing in a conga line across the deck and singing in British accents, accompanied by full invisible orchestra.

"Wake up all you sleepy heads!

Toothpaste gets you out of bed!

We've got the toothpaste pump!

We love the toothpaste pump!"

Isaac shook his head. "I'd forgotten how much I hate Eighties music!"

"I dunno," Osmerelda considered. "I think it's kinda catchy!" She noticed Isaac scowling. "But I'll get rid of 'em for you!"

"Thanks!" He arranged empty glasses on his bar. "They're scaring away my customers!"

"I'll take care of it!"

Isaac nodded. "Gonna zap 'em?"

Osmerelda felt her jacket. "Oh no... I left my gadget downstairs!" She looked determined. "But I can handle them!"

"Are you sure? We can get..."

But Osmerelda was gone, racing across the floor to the dancing kids. Listening, she picked up the rhythm and jumped to the front of the conga line.

"I've got the... whatever they're talking about...

I love the... thing they're talking about..."

Taking over the line, she steered them across the deck to the railing at the edge of the ship.

"We've got the toothpaste pump!

We love the toothpaste pump!"

Then she spotted it: A gap in the railing. She led them in that direction, then jumped to one side as the kids plunged over the side of the ship into the ocean.

"HOLY..."

Isaac ran over and peered down to see the kids hit the water, still singing and dancing, and dissolve into soap scum. He stared at Osmerelda in amazed horror.

"You are a little PSYCHO, you know that?"

"Hey, it's my place on the team. I'm the sweet and adorable but utterly ruthless one," Osmerelda shrugged. "Besides, they weren't real or alive. They were just artificial constructs conjured up by the whistles."

"Oh..." Isaac rubbed the back of his neck. "I guess that makes it okay, then..."

"Besides, you were right. That song did get kinda annoying after a few seconds." She smiled. "Gotta get back to my team now! Seeya!"

She ran off. Isaac stood there, blinking.

"Okay, that one... That one needs watching..."

#

"WEL-COME ABOARD, IT'S LOOOOOOOVE!"

Jackie Jokers finished his song. He bowed profusely to a smattering of applause.

Oswald, meanwhile, was leaning down at their table. "Hey, do you guys hear that?"

Omar looked over. "Hear what?"

"It sounds like music!" Slipping out of his chair, Oswald peered under the tablecloth. "It seems to be coming from under..."

He slipped under the table and was gone.

"Oswald?" Orla and Omar jumped to their feet. "Oswald!"

They lifted the cloth to look under the table. Oswald wasn't there. He had disappeared.

"OSWALD! OSWALD! Where ARE you, man?"

Just then, Osmerelda ran over. "Hey, guys! What'd I miss?"

#

"Champagne?" Inspector Clouseau took the proffered bottle. "This is really most unexpected, I will say..."

"It"s a special gift! In appreciation of all your hard work!"

"Well! That is certainly most kind of them, though hardly undeserved. Still, the work in itself is quite reward enough..." He turned the bottle over in his hands. "And a most excellent vintage too. For you see, as a Frenchman, I know all about these things... By the matter, you do seem rather young for a waiter..."

Ohlm smiled. "I'm an apprentice. Here," he produced a glass. "Try it."

Behind Clouseau, a figure materialized out of nowhere. The Shadow crept toward the display case containing the whistles, a burlap bag in one hand.

Clouseau took the glass. "Well, of course, I am not supposed to drink on duty..." He looked at the bottle and the glass. "But a small sip should not too badly interfere with my faculties..."

He uncorked the bottle. A strange, almost invisible mist rose from inside.

"After all, what kind of a Frenchman should I be if I could not hold my drink? It would be quite..."

He fell to the floor, unconscious. The glass and the completely empty bottle fell to the ground and shattered.

"NOW!" Ohlm hissed to The Shadow.

She shattered the glass case with a hammer, grabbed the whistles, and vanished, her camouflage cloak rendering her completely invisible.

Ohlm, meanwhile, ran out the door, shedding his waiter disguise along the way, popping his nose-filters out into his hand, and re-donning his villain glasses.

"EEEE-HEEE-HEEE-HEEEE-HAH!"

#

"Oswald?" Omar looked around frantically. "Oswald!"

Osmerelda joined in the search. "Where could he have gone to?"

Keen-eyed Orla scanned the auditorium. "Those accursed whistles might have transported him anywhere! We must search! But try not to attract too much undue attention!"

The three agents split up, trying to be inconspicuous as they peered under tables and behind doors looking for their lost partner.

Meanwhile, Jackie Jokers was at the mic again.

"And now folks, a special performance. You might have noticed Odd Squad turning up here and there on the ship..."

A spotlight caught Omar in the middle of an aisle. He looked around, stunned and blinking in the sudden light, waved, then disappeared into the shadows again.

"So in honor of them, we've brought in one of their own, accompanied by his renowned jug-swing-psychedelia orchestra..." Jackie paused, rechecked the paper he was reading from, confirmed that really was what it said, shrugged, and finished the introduction. "And now, folks... THE OBFUSCO EXPERIENCE!"

He exited and the curtain rose to reveal Agent Obfusco holding an electric guitar, flanked by other agents also wearing cowboy hats and brandishing various instruments. He stormed over and grabbed the mic.

"Madames and monsieurs!" he announced. "We would like to favor you with a very personal song I first encountered in the backwaters of Southern Peru, where I was spear-fishing with the cat-goddess Bast during a sabbatical from our studies in the crystal cathedral of the Temples of Shalla-Bal! It spoke to me then and I hope it speaks to you!" He waved his arms. "OBFUSCO!"

Obfusco and his band began their song...

"They will point in the fortune fountain

Searching for a place in the mountain

Where the sexless virgins could moan

Watched by clergymen with faces of stone

Under the law of human absurdity..."

Obfusco's back-up singers: "Oooo-oooo-ooooo-WAH!"

"When the crying men of Jerusalem are empty of tears

When the bloodthirsty hunters are killing their fears

To satisfy their hunger for blood!

To make the world know that everything good

Be better for human absurdity..."

#

Gladys Kravitz sat in the audience, quite stunned. Abner continued to doze beside her.

The little kid turned to face her again.

"You can talk during this one."

Gladys nodded. "Uh... Thank you?"

#

"Oooo-ooo-ooo-WAH!"

"Reincarnation and ghosts chained together

Will make a change in the weather

An apparition will appear for someone tonight

And explain that things are not right

In the land of human absurdity!"

"Oooo-ooo-ooo-WAH!"

#

The Odd Squad agents continued their search. Finally, Orla heard a loud thud from a nearby broom closet. She opened the door and out stumbled Agent Oswald, disheveled and shell-shocked.

"Oswald!" She caught the fainting agent in her arms and led him back to their table, signaling the others, who rushed over to join them.

Orla helped him to a chair. Osmerelda handed the little agent a glass of water. He downed it all in one gulp.

"Are you okay?" Omar asked. "You were just gone a couple minutes..."

"I was?" Oswald was still confused. "It seemed so much longer... Time must work differently there. Is this the ship? Am I back in the real world? Am I in color?"

#

"Child-killing cars on the highway

Gloomy motorboats on the seaway

And the sinister mugshots in streets of towns

Murderers, thieves, hypocrites, they've all fallen down

To the bottom of human absurdity..."

"Oooo-ooo-ooooooo-WAH!"

#

Joshua hurried over with a handkerchief to mop the sweat off Oswald's face.

"Oh good, you found him. Where was he?"

"I...I'm not sure," Oswald gasped. "I think I was in a Betty Boop cartoon..."

"Oh my GOD..." Joshua clutched the agent's hand.

"Everything was alive... And SHIMMYING..." He shuddered. "I think I saw a tree spanking itself... Are my eyes back? They turned into little black dots there..."

"You're fine, buddy," Omar assured him. "Everything's okay."

"You have obviously been through an ordeal," Orla told him. "Would you like to go to the van and rest? We can handle things here..."

"No, that's okay," Oswald sat up, ran his hands through his hair, and straightened his tie. "I'm okay. I wanna see this."

"Very well," Orla nodded. "If that is your wish."

"Besides, it could have been worse. I could have ended up in Lidsville..."

A balding green-skinned man with red hair appeared out of nowhere. "That, my little bacon bit, is still.a possibility!"

He then vanished in a puff of smoke.

Oswald checked and made sure he still had his gadgets. Then he sat back to watch the show.

#

"Malicious Chinese producing power again

Overflowing the world with radioactive rain

And the Russians incriminating USA

I wish them all welcome to the day

Of the funeral of human absurdity!"

"Oooo-WAH! WAH!"

The song ended. Obfusco and his band struck a pose.

Jackie Jokers stood in the wings. He had no idea how to follow that.

#

Meanwhile, Ohlm and Olizabeth had just forced open the doors of the OSMU van.

"HEY! STOP! YOU ARE NOT AUTHORIZED..."

Olizabeth produced a device and pointed it at the van computer screen. Van Computer's voice crackled and faded and the screen went black.

"There!" Olizabeth rubbed her gloved hands together. "It should be a snap to reprogram the van and bring it under our control!"

"And then we can use it to escape with the whistles!" Ohlm tossed a burlap bag onto the floor.

"Hey, be careful!" Olizabeth warned. "The whistles might not appreciate being flung around like that!"

Ohlm was too busy gloating to listen. "The irony is absolutely perfect! Odd Squad itself will provide our getaway vehicle!"

He threw back his head and cackled malevolently. Incredibly, he didn't seem to realize Olizabeth could see he'd replaced his nose filters.

Then he glared at Olizabeth. "Well, get on with it! Transfer control of the van to us! We don't have much time, you know!"

Olizabeth turned to face him, clutching her cape. "No," she smiled. "No, you don't."

Ohlm felt hands seizing his wrists.

"HEY!"

Invisible fingers pried his left hand open, revealing the gas bomb he'd palmed when he put down the bag. It flew out of his hand and levitated to a nearby shelf.

"You were right!" A voice shouted over Ohlm's shoulder. "He had it all planned. As soon as Olizabeth finished re-programming the van, he was gonna knock her out and leave her here to take the blame while he escaped!"

A tall girl with pigtails emerged from the hallway. "Yeah! Good work, partner!"

"Octavia?" Ohlm stared in shock. "Oz? How'd you...?"

"I called them!" The Little O appeared on the monitor screen. "They were in town anyway and I figured Oz would be a good way to take you by surprise!"

"Oh yeah?" Wrenching himself free, Ohlm made a dive for the bag. "Well, you just wait until... Until..."

Ohlm's face fell. He felt around inside the bag, then turned it upside down and shook it.

"Where're the whistles?"

"Back in the display room where they belong!" Olizabeth's smile widened. "I never took them. I just dropped them on the floor behind the display case and left them there. Then I gave you that empty sack!"

Opal emerged from the hallway. "You didn't really think my little sister would be dumb enough to fall for your tricks, did you?" She put her arm around Olizabeth's shoulder. "When you started trying to con her into helping you, she contacted the Little O and told her everything. We've been onto you from the start!"

"But... But..." Oz and Octavia grabbed Ohlm and lifted him to his feet. "I don't understand! She wasn't...? She didn't...? But... I... I thought she... I thought she liked me..."

"Come on, Ohlm! Time to go!"

They escorted him out of the van. He looked sadly back at Olizabeth. "I thought she liked me..."

The van door slid shut behind them. Opal looked apologetically down at her sister.

"Okay, I admit it!" Opal said. "You really had me worried! If The Little O hadn't told me what was going on, I don't know what would have happened!"

"Thank goodness Osmerelda talked you into coming to me!" Little O said from the screen.

"I almost ruined your entire plan!" Opal admitted. "All because I didn't trust you. I'm really sorry."

Olizabeth nodded.

"Can... D'you think we can try again?"

Olizabeth sighed. "Sure. Okay. But could you at least stop listening in on my therapy sessions?"

"You listen in on her therapy sessions?" Little O scowled.

Opal blushed. "I... didn't think you knew about that..."

"She puts a glass up to the wall and everything!" Olizabeth told the monitor. "Really old school Nancy Drew..."

"I promise I'll stop! I'll stop!"

They smiled at each other. "Okay, we'll start over again, again. And this time, we'll BOTH behave ourselves!"

Little O nodded. "So, y'gonna go see what's left of the show?"

Both girls considered.

"I think we'd better just clean up the display room and put the whistles back where they belong!"

"Yeah. They might get testy if they're just left on the floor too long..."

#

And back in the auditorium, the Brady Bunch Kids had taken the stage. Clad in sequined overalls, white frilled pirate shirts, and derby hats, they went into their version of 'Proud Mary' while the audience sat there, quietly stunned.

Julie McCoy came over and whispered to the team, "Can't you do something?"

Oswald shook his head, unable to look away from the stage. "We take care of anything strange, weird, and especially odd. Completely effed up isn't in our jurisdiction."

Marjorie came over, looked nervously at Julie, who quietly left, and leaned close.

"Guys? John..."

Omar nodded. "I'll take care of it." He produced his clothes-adjustinator. "Where is he?"

"Bathroom," she whispered. She looked up at the stage. "Probably a good thing it happened now. He never did like that show..."

#

Then another band.

"I live in a cucumber castle

On the banks of a cranberry sea

And starfish play under my drawbridge

And blackbirds make nests in my tree..."

Oswald noticed Orla drawing out her gadget and stopped her.

"No! Don't!" He cried, grabbing her arm. "I know it's hard to believe but they're supposed to look like that!"

Orla looked at him. "They are supposed to be a quartet of human-sized stuffed animals who live in castles hollowed out of vegetables?"

Oswald nodded. "It... It was the Seventies..."

Orla understood. She put her gadget away. "Ah, yes. I believe you explained it to me. The Kroft brothers, correct?"

Oswald nodded.

Omar came back and rejoined them. Some distance behind them, a full-sized John Martin rejoined his wife at their table. Gladys Kravitz stared at him.

She nudged her husband. "Abner... Abner..."

Abner sighed wearily. "What now?"

She pointed to the Martins. "That lady came in with a little kid a while ago."

"Oh yeah. Think I remember him. Looked kinda like John Denver..."

Gladys ignored him. "Then the kid ran out and now this guy just came in and sat down with her."

Abner looked at them. "Oh yeah. I think they're married."

"But WHERE DID THE KID GO?"

Abner shrugged. "Maybe he got sick. Or maybe it was his bedtime, I dunno..."

"And I could swear they're both wearing the same suit..."

"I live in a purple plum mansion

In the midst of a strawberry stream

And mellifluous bells ring out softly

From a hill of vanilla fudge cream..."

Orla's fist struck the table. "This is preposterous! He just said he lived in a castle made of cucumbers! Now he claims to reside within a purple mansion? And I cannot believe a hill composed of any flavor cream would be geologically stable enough to support a bell-tower being built upon it!"

Oswald tried to calm her. "They're just song lyrics..."

"Well, it is an absurd song! The narrative is wildly inconsistent and there is no story to speak of! And I do not understand what his pleasure in his professed gender identity or his love of his mate have to do with his bizarre choice of residences!"

Osmerelda considered. "Maybe the lion guy lives in the cucumber castle and the purple plum mansion belongs to the dog with the floppy tongue..."

"Hmm..." Omar pondered this. "I wonder where the little elephant guy with the glasses lives."

"Probably has a basement apartment in Van Nuys," Osmerelda replied. "He just seems like the type..."

Omar considered. "I live in a basement apartment in Van Nuys..." he sang, then shook his head. "Nope. Doesn't fit the rhyme scheme..."

Oswald just stared at them.

Marjorie came over. "Guys..."

Before Oswald could volunteer, Osmerelda bounded to her feet. "I'll do it!"

Oswald sulked in his chair. "I just hope they have gender-neutral bathrooms..."

#

And in another part of the auditorium...

"Oh Richard, I do wish they would put on Funt and Mundane," Hyacinth fluffed the pillow under her foot. "All this... 'popular' music is giving me a dreadful headache..."

Richard checked the program. "They should be on quite soon, Hyacinth. Perhaps they're having problems backstage."

"Oh, I certainly hope not!" Hyacinth took a drink of water. "We should contrive to talk with them after their performance. Perhaps we might be able to entice them to one of my candlelight suppers! That would be quite the coup..."

Richard cringed internally. "Hyacinth, I don't think Mister Funt and Ms. Mundane even live in England, and I would hardly..."

"Oh nonsense, Richard! A wealthy and sophisticated couple like them certainly have homes all over the world! And I'm sure they would appreciate an opportunity to commune with other, like-minded people in a properly rarefied atmosphere with subdued lighting and genuine bone China place settings..."

"Hyacinth..."

"Oh, it would certainly be the talk of the town! Among the right sort of people, of course. And it would put that Evelyn Ogden-Mantel in her place! I have not forgotten how her tardiness ruined my last garden party!"

Richard winced. "I daresay nobody in the neighborhood has forgotten that party..."

"I am quite certain she deliberately sabotaged the presentation of my Bombe Alaska!"

"Hyacinth, I sincerely doubt she planned it! It was hardly her fault..."

"It was! To keep the desert fresh until she and her husband showed up, I had to keep adding more rum..."

"You should have been more careful when you ignited it. As it was, we're just lucky the fire department was able to put out the blaze before any real harm was done..."

"Completely ruined my beautiful rose bushes and one of my very best hats... And of course everyone left early..."

"Well, you certainly can't blame them for that! The whole block was evacuated!"

"And I'd finally persuaded Mrs. Preston Hodgeworth to come. I daresay I'll have a dreadful time getting her to come again..."

"Well, certainly not until her eyebrows grow back..." Richard sighed. "Honestly, when you realized Mrs. Mantel was going to be late, why couldn't you just have put the dessert in the freezer until she arrived?"

"Richard!" Hyacinth scolded. "I worked long and hard upon preparing the perfect Bombe Alaska! I did not go through such laborious culinary efforts just so it could taste like freezer!"

"AT LAST!" Osmerelda ran over and hugged the startled matron. "Someone who understands!"

#

A short time later, Osmerelda escorted Little John Martin back to his table. Gladys Kravitz stared, her eyes bulging out of her head.

"You see? You see, Abner? Now the guy's gone and the little kid is back! And I know they're wearing the same suit!"

"So? Maybe they got a deal at the Men's Warehouse..."

"Something funny's going on..." Gladys grabbed her program. "And where's Funt and Mundane? They should be on by now!"

#

Backstage...

"Funt and Mundane?" Jackie Jokers consulted with the stage manager. "You're on next!"

"We'll be ready!" The two actors took their respective places.

Joshua checked the set once more to make sure everything was perfect before returning to his seat up front.

#

And in the show room below, Opal and Olizabeth had just put the last of the Death Whistles back in their newly repaired display case.

"There!" Opal said, checking them over carefully. "No harm done, I hope! Now we just need to sweep up the broken glass..."

The Whistles started howling, first one, then another, and then a whole chorus shrieking the most skin-crawling noises imaginable. They sat on their cushions and seemed almost to pulse with an eerie, eldritch light.

Olizabeth looked over. "Uh-oh..."

#

TO BE CONTINUED...