Disclaimer I do not own the rights to any Mario characters or One Piece characters.
Chapter 7: Dinosaurs, Giants, Wax Men, and Kongs Oh My.
At a hotel on an unknown island
We come across a young girl wearing a pink sunhat, a blue shirt with clouds on it and a red skirt sitting in a lounging chair staring at a piece of paper in her hands. "Mister Three?" she asked a strange man sitting nearby.
"Yes? Miss Golden Week?" the man asked
"I'm bored."
"You say you're bored, but yet you hate working right?"
"Yes."
"So then stop bothering me and enjoy the long vacation that very few agents are privileged to." The man replied taking a sip of his tea. "Oh, and one more thing. I would prefer it if you don't call me by my codename in public. It is imperative that we maintain our secrecy as members of Baroque Works, so please do be more careful in the future or people may find out that I am indeed Mister Three." Mister Three finished explaining as he is revealed to be a tall, lanky man with glasses wearing khakis and a blue striped vest and his hair shaped in such a way that it looks like the number three.
"Okay." Miss Golden Week replied staring at her partners strange hair style.
"By the way." Mister three said glancing over to his partner. "I couldn't help but notice you staring at that piece of paper. What about it is so captivating?"
"It's a message from the boss." She casually stated, flipping the paper over revealing the stamp of Mister Zero.
"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME SOONER!?" Mister Three yelled snatching the message from Miss Golden Week. "Well, it looks like Mister Five and his partner Miss Valentine were defeated." He stated, getting a curios glance from Miss Golden Week.
"And? Is that good or bad?" she asked.
"Neither you see if an agent fails their mission, it doesn't affect me in the slightest. I have no obligation to clean up their mess, but it also offers me no benefit either since he was a lower ranked agent. If it was Mister Two on the other hand, then that would offer me a chance to raise my rank in Baroque Works." Mister Three explained finishing his tea. "Still, we do have orders to eliminate the one responsible, Red Cap Mario."
"Isn't he that pirate with a 50,000,000 bounty?" Miss Golden Week asked.
"Yes, an impressive bounty indeed, but nothing we need to worry about." Mister Three reassured his partner while refilling his cup of tea. "We are also to retrieve an item from him called a "power star". Well orders are orders, but even if we weren't given specific orders to take him down, he and his companions would have to be eliminated to uphold the credibility of our agency if not villainy everywhere." He explained while sipping his tea, "Soon they will know the terror of Mister Three." He stated with a sinister grin.
Back on the Merry
The Straw Hat Pirates were sailing towards Little Garden with their new crew member Vivi. As they were approaching the island Mario saw that Vivi was silently staring at the ground.
"Hey Vivi." Mario called out getting her attention. "What's wrong? You have been acting strange for a while now."
"Oh, it's nothing just… I can't stop thinking about Igaram and the others." Vivi solemnly replied. Nami and Sanji walked up to her to try and comfort her over the death of her friends.
"It's okay Vivi, we'll avenge them." Nami stated grabbing Vivi in a hug, Sanji stood to the side frustrated at how helpless he was to cheer her up.
"Damnit, if only there was something I could do." He muttered to himself before his face lit up. "I know!" he said as he ran into the kitchen.
"They're alive." Mario said grabbing everyone's attention.
"What, how do you know that Mario?" Nami questioned.
"You know that when I pull my gloves, I activate one of my powers right?" he asked getting an affirmative nod from everyone. "Well back at Whiskey Peaks when I noticed something was wrong with the ship, I activated my power to stop time." He explained shocking everyone there.
"YOU CAN STOP TIME!" Usopp yelled.
"Yeah, for about ten to fifteen seconds at a time" Mario explained. "And back at Whiskey Peaks when I stopped time I darted towards the ship and pulled Igaram and the others to the opposite shore. Don't worry I left them a note explaining what happened and to continue towards Alabasta, so we should see them there if they can find a ship." Mario finished explaining, receiving a punch from Nami.
"AND YOU COULDN'T TELL US SOONER!" she demanded in anger.
"I'm sorry with everything that happened with Miss Sunday I sort of just forgot."
Vivi then tackled Mario, he was expecting her to slap or hit him, but she just held him and began to cry into his shoulders. "Thank you, Mario." She said in relief.
"You're welcome Vivi. I really should have told you sooner."
"It's okay Mario, I'm just glad Igaram and the others are ok." Vivi said before giving Mario a kiss on the cheek.
"Okay Vivi, I made you something to cheer you up! What the!? What the heck is going on here!?" Sanji shouted while bringing out two ice cream looking desserts and seeing Mario receiving a kiss from Vivi. After some explaining Sanji then begins to shake Mario while tears pour from his eyes. "Damnit Mario! Damnit! Why! Why are you so lucky! It's not fair!" Sanji cried while Mario tried his best to calm him down.
"It's alright Sanji, besides this dessert really does help, so thank you." Vivi said as she gave Sanji a kiss on the cheek in gratitude and to get him to let go of Mario.
"You're quite welcome Vivi! I'm just glad I was able to cheer you up!" Sanji cheerfully said with hearts in his eyes and letting go of Mario. Luffy then demanded Sanji make him a dessert also, but Sanji refused saying that he was born to feed the ladies and that it would be impossible since their food stores were empty.
"Really, aw man. Well maybe we can find a store on this island to restock from. Oh, maybe from a barbecue restaurant!" Luffy stated making everyone angry at how stupid he was.
"You moron! Weren't you listening to Mario when he possessed Miss Sunday? This is a prehistoric island, there are no shops to buy food from." Sanji yelled in annoyance.
"Well, what about bananas?" Luffy asked.
"I guess bananas would be good, but we would need a lot more than just bananas to survive our journey to Alabasta. Besides where the heck would we… get… bananas?" Sanji asked as he saw dozens upon dozens of bananas litter the ground while they sailed inwards towards the island.
"Woohoo! We're having a banana party!" Luffy shouted as he stretched out his arm to grab a banana. However, as he was about to peel it Mario snatched it from his hands. "Hey! What the heck are you…"
"Shush!" Mario snapped, shutting Luffy up as he examined the banana. "No way, it couldn't be." Mario said to himself as he jumped off the Merry and onto the island. "Is it really him, how did he get here?" Mario continued to say as he examined the ground and the bananas.
"Mario what's wrong?" Nami asked curios as to what Mario was worried about.
"Whatever you do don't eat a single banana, don't squish them either, just leave them alone!" Mario shouted at the rest of the crew.
"What, we can't eat a single one?" Luffy asked in annoyance.
"Not unless you want to get punched to the moon!" Mario shouted back shocking everyone at his warning. "I can't believe he actually made it here." Mario said to himself as he darted deeper into the jungle.
"Hey! Come back here! What do you mean!?" Luffy shouted as he chased after Mario.
"Luffy! Mario! Karoo come quickly!" Vivi called for her loyal duck as they both jumped onto the island. "Don't worry I'll bring them back!" Vivi said to Nami as she mounted Karoo and took off towards the direction of Mario and Luffy.
"Vivi!" Nami called out, just then Zoro jumped off the boat as well. "Zoro! Where are you going?" Nami asked.
"For a walk, we have to stay here until the log pose locks onto the next island, right?" Zoro asked Nami receiving an affirmative nod back. "Then I'm going for a walk while we wait."
"Oh, hey Zoro." Sanji called out getting Zoro's attention. "If you happen to come across any animals that seem edible, do you mind bringing them back. We need more than just bananas to restock our food stores."
"Sure, I'll do it since you can't hunt, you shitty cook."
"What was that?!" Sanji angrily replied jumping on shore with Zoro. "You think I can't hunt down my own food moss head?"
"Yeah, that's right." Zoro stated glaring at Sanji.
"Alright moss head, challenge accepted. The winner is the one who brings back the most pounds of meat."
"What do you mean pounds, because I'll bring back tons."
"Yeah, yeah, let your hunting skills do the talking." Sanji finished saying as he and Zoro trekked off into the jungle.
"N-N-Nami…" Usopp stuttered in fear.
"Yeah Usopp?" she replied.
"Everyone left, it's just us." Usopp stated getting a silent terrified stare from Nami. "So, what are we going to do!?" he yelled.
"Don't yell like that! You'll attract unwanted attention!" Nami yelled back. "We'll just stay here in the ship, yeah we're safe here." She explained. They waited in the ship until a large rumbling and cry was heard in the jungle. Usopp and Nami tried to ignore it until it got closer and closer until. In the bush near the ship a large ape like figure jumps out and just stares at them. Nami and Usopp just stared at the ape with a necktie until Usopp spoke up.
"Hey, Nami does that ape have a necktie?" he asked.
"Really, that's the thing that stood out to you?" Nami questioned back, taking more notice of the ape's giant stature. Just then both a t-rex and a pterodactyl swooped in to eat the ape. The ape swiftly avoided the attacks and with one punch from its right fist knocked both dinosaurs into the air where they came crashing down out cold. The ape then beat its chest in victory before grabbing all the bananas around and leaping into the forest.
"Hey Nami, do you think that ape was what Mario was so worried about?" Usopp asked her, remembering Mario's warning of not touching the bananas.
"Must be, it went directly after the bananas that Mario warned us not to touch. So, if we just leave the bananas alone and stay on the ship, we should be fine right?" she questioned, suddenly more stomping started coming from the jungle.
"He beat my prey before I could, well at least he left me the meat." Came a thunderous voice from the jungle. Just then a giant with a large axe came out of the jungle grabbing the two dinosaurs off the ground before noticing Usopp and Nami on the ship. "Oh, hello there. Hey, do you happen to have any alcohol on your ship?"
Nami and Usopp just stood in shear terror until Nami spoke up, "What was that? I didn't catch it."
"I asked if you had any alcohol?"
"Well yeah." Nami answered the giant. "But it's not really the drinking kind, it's the kind for cooking and cleaning, but if that's your thing then have all you want." Just then the giant let out a loud scream, the t-rex had woken up and bit his back while the pterodactyl flew away. The giant then turned and swung his giant axe beheading the t-rex.
"I'm Broggy, Elbath's greatest warrior, I'm invincible or mostly." He stated while letting out a hearty laugh. "And now I have dinner, and you two are invited to be my guest." He said to Nami and Usopp before they fainted.
Meanwhile with Luffy and Vivi they continued to chase Mario until they come across a group of long neck dinosaurs. "Whoa, cool." Luffy said in wonder before he launched his arm towards it pulling himself onto its head.
"Luffy!" Vivi called out as he was on top of the long necks head. "Get down from there, it's dangerous!" she pleaded as a herd of long necks suddenly showed up and tried to eat Luffy. He jumped from one to the other, avoiding their snapping jaws until what appeared to be the leader of the group swallowed Luffy whole. Vivi was terrified until a giant sword cut the long necks head off and grabbed Luffy as he fell out.
The Giant let out a hearty chuckle before speaking, "What fun! I haven't seen anyone swing from long necks like that before. That was the most entertaining thing I've seen in a while." The giant said while holding Luffy in his palm. "It was a good thing it was just some long necks and not the new king of the jungle, if it was him who was after you then you would be dead by now." he said as he let out a hearty chuckle.
"New king of the jungle?" Vivi questioned as she remembered Mario's expression as soon as he saw all the bananas. "Did the new king appear just recently?" she asked the giant.
"Yes, actually. They appeared a few days ago, a strange creature along with his whole family. We thought he was just a weak animal about to learn the harsh reality of the jungle, but boy were we wrong." He explained as he let out another hardy laugh, "Come, I'll explain everything over a warm meal." He said as he lifted the dead long neck and walked towards his camp.
Meanwhile, with Zoro he was walking along a path looking for prey when his stomach began to grumble. "Damnit, I should've eaten something before going out to hunt, can't cut anything on an empty stomach." That is when he saw a bunch of bananas on the ground. "Nothing like a little mid hunting snack to keep up my energy." Zoro stated as he picked up the bananas, but before he could even start peeling one, they were snatched out of his hands. "What the?" was his thought as he turned to the culprit. It was a small monkey wearing a red t-shirt and red cap with what looked like barrels strapped to its back.
It began to hold the bananas in a taunting fashion at Zoro while making some unflattering grunts and chitter at him. Zoro then pulled out one of his swords and pointed it at the monkey.
"Okay monkey, I know you like bananas, but those are mine. So, hand them over or else this is going to get ugly." He threatened the small monkey, but it just pointed and laughed at him. "All right that's it!" Zoro said in frustration as he dashed towards the monkey and swung his sword down. But the monkey dodged and smacked Zoro on the face with its tail. In frustration Zoro pulled out a second sword and began to attack the monkey repeatedly. However, the monkey was too agile and avoided every swing Zoro threw at it. It then did a backflip to avoid one of Zoro's slashes and while it was in the air Zoro dashed towards to it. "Now I got you!" he thought as he struck where the monkey should have landed, but instead saw that the monkey was hovering with the barrels on it's back. "What the, are those jet packs? Since when did monkeys have jet packs?" he thought as the monkey took out pistol looking weapons and shot peanuts at Zoro. Zoro slashed them easily enough, "Hah, is that all you got monkey?" he asked pointing at the monkey, only to see it was gone. Zoro then began to look for the monkey before it landed on him and slapped him a few times in the face before fleeing into the jungle giving some taunting tail wiggles.
As Zoro got up rubbing his cheeks from where the monkey slapped him, he suddenly grabbed his swords and pointed to where it ran off. "When I get my hands on you monkey your dead!" he shouted, then the bush began to shake. He pulled his third sword, ready for a rematch with the primate, however instead a triceratops came out. "Well, another user of the three sword style huh, you'll make nice game and stress relief." He said as he instantly cut down the dinosaur, "Let's see that curly brow loser beat this." He thought in victory, meanwhile with Sanji.
"What the hell?!" Sanji said having received another blow from his opponent, an old ape with a long white beard, a cane and glasses. "Look there's more than enough bananas for everyone, so there's nothing wrong if I take a few." He tried to explain to the old ape, it just stood on its tree branch watching Sanji. As Sanji bent down to try and grab some bananas the ape launched at him. Sanji reactively threw out his leg to try and kick the ape away, but it balanced on his leg with its cane before smacking Sanji on the head with it and picking up the bananas. "Why you." Sanji thought as he rubbed the top of his head. The old ape just made an unflattering flatulence noise at Sanji before leaping off into the jungle. Sanji stood in frustration before something big stomped behind him, it was a large t-rex looking at Sanji with hungry eyes. "Oh hey, perfect timing. I can use a punching bag and you look edible enough." Sanji stated as the dinosaur lounged at him. Sanji just jumped out of the way before delivering a devasting kick to the top of its head killing it instantly. "Hah! Let's see that stupid swordsman beat this." He thought in victory, meanwhile with Usopp and Nami.
"Hey Nami wake up." Usopp whispered to Nami while nudging her. As she woke up and was about to speak Usopp quickly put one finger to her lips to stop her. "Quiet Nami, this is our chance to escape." Usopp explained motioning to the giant who was busy preparing the dinosaur meat. With a silent nod they snuck out, as they were crawling through the bushes some drool began to fall onto Nami's shoulder. When they looked up, they saw a giant sabretooth cat ready to pounce. With a loud scream they ran as fast as they could while being chased by the jungle cat. Then while they were running, they ran into another t-rex that began to chase them. The chase continued until Broggy stepped in front of them. With a smile and salivating lips, the wild animals were chased off.
"Oh, you're finally awake. The meat is ready, consider it thanks for the alcohol." Broggy explained to the still frightened straw hats. He then took them back to his camp and offered them a huge slab of meat while he began to eat his own.
"Welp this is it, he's going to fatten us up before eating us." Usopp said in defeat.
"We'll be plump and juicy." Nami said in agreement.
"What's the matter? Dinosaur meat is sweet and juicy, I promise." Broggy explained.
"We just have to keep our hunger and waistline in check until the log pose resets, then we can get out of here." Nami explained.
"Yeah but, I'm so hungry I don't think I'll have the stomach or will power to resist his offer." Usopp replied.
"Well, what a shame, you really don't know what kind of meal you're missing out here." Broggy said while eating his meat.
"Hey, Broggy." Nami called.
"Yes, what's on your mind little lady?"
"How long does it take for the log pose to reset here?"
"One full year." Broggy answered, causing Nami and Usopp to fall over in shock.
"It's over, we have to admit defeat." Usopp said with tears in his eyes.
"If we waited a whole year, we wouldn't have stomachs to feed." Nami replied in agreement.
"Don't tell me you're falling asleep again." Broggy said while letting out another hearty laugh.
Back with Luffy, the giant who saved him, who explained his name was Dory, had cooked the long neck and was enjoying a wonderful meal with Luffy.
"Wow, giant guy your cooking is great." Luffy said with a mouth full of food.
"Why thank you, and your refreshments are great too, though the portions are a little small." Dory replied with a hearty laugh.
"Yeah, I know, but our chef made them so I'm glad you like them or else I would have to beat you up." Luffy said casually.
Dory then glanced at Luffy, "Was that a threat?" he questioned causing Vivi and Karoo to gasp in fear. Then Dory let out a laugh, "Your funny little man, I like you." With this Vivi calmed down until Luffy spoke up.
"So, why do you live here giant guy? Don't you have a home?"
"I came from a village. A place of many warriors, called Elbath. It used to be home, but I no longer call it that."
"Why?"
"Because there are certain rules that must be followed in Elbath."
"What kind of rules?"
"If a fight breaks out and neither side yields judgement is passed by Elbath's god, whomever he deems worthy is deemed the winner, and will be granted survival and divine protection." Dory explained.
"So Elbath's god decides, that doesn't seem fair." Luffy said in confusion.
"Fair or not, all that matters is that this is our battle ground. As in Elbath our god will decide who is worthy of winning both the duel and his life." Dory then let out a laugh before continuing, "We fought for over a century, but Elbath has yet to choose a champion." He finished explaining before continuing to laugh.
"Whoa, you fought for more than a hundred years." Luffy said in awe.
"From a human's standpoint a hundred years may seem like a lot, but not to us since a giant's average lifespan is three times bigger than yours."
"Even with all the time in the world I think your desire would wane after a hundred years of the same battle. At this point is there any real animosity left between you two or are you just fighting to fight." Vivi questioned.
Back with Sanji, he was dragging his catch down a path back to the Merry. "Well, I think there's little risk of being outdone by Zoro with this one. I almost feel bad for him, with this slab of meat he doesn't stand a chance."
Meanwhile, Zoro was also dragging his catch back to the Merry and was about to run into Sanji. "I beat him, with this hull Sanji doesn't have a chance of winning." As he dragged his catch, they ran into each other.
"Zoro" "Sanji" they said to each other, before at the same time they yelled "I win." They then got angry at each other and laid they're hulls next to each other in comparison.
"See, mines longer." Sanji said in triumph.
"Who cares, it's about how big it is and mine is obviously thicker." Zoro retorted.
"It's not about how big it is, it's about how much meat you bring back. Yours is all bone, you probably have like four pounds of meat."
"Like yours is any better, it's all just skin and muscle."
"I'm not going to argue with you, if you really want to make a fool of yourself, I'll catch something else ok." Just then a volcano erupted, "There, you have until the next eruption to catch your prey. Think you can handle that moss head?" Sanji asked before walking off.
"Yeah, you shitty cook. Just don't cry when you lose." Zoro responded while walking in the opposite direction. "Going to need to get serious if I want to win." He said to himself as he reached for his bandana, only to find it missing. "What the, my bandana is gone. That little monkey took my bandana!"
Meanwhile with Sanji, he was searching his coat for his matches and cigarettes when it donned on him. "That friggin wrinkly old ape took my cigarettes, I'm gonna kill it when I catch it."
Back with Nami and Usopp, they finally started to eat the meat Broggy gave them when they noticed the erupting volcano. Broggy then threw his meat in the fire before standing up. "Forgive me friends but I must go. That eruption is the signal for me and my opponent to continue our duel."
"A duel? With whom, where, and most importantly why?" Usopp asked.
"Why, I don't remember." Broggy said with a hearty laugh. "Oh, and by the way don't eat any of the bananas lying around or else the king of the jungle will be angry with you. And he's even stronger than me."
Back with Luffy and Vivi, Dory equips his shield and sword. "And before we knew it this became our routine. That volcano marks the beginning of our duel."
"It's senseless, how could you have so much hatred for someone if you fight them for a century? What could have happened to make you this mad?" Vivi questioned, until Luffy stop her.
"Vivi that's enough, that's not what this is about." Luffy explained.
"You're right, this is about honor." Dory said in agreement. "Oh, and don't eat any of the bananas, the king of the jungle gets very angry if you eat his food without his permission and he's someone even stronger than me." Dory explained before rushing off to meet Broggy in battle.
As they approached each other they both let out a battle cry: "I have forgotten the reason for our brawl!"
As they clashed however, they were being watched by insidious forces. Deep in the jungle a dinosaur comes across a strange wax like building. When it tried to bite into it, it's teeth shattered.
"Are you done yet?" asked an unknown voice drawing the dinosaurs attention. "We have business here so beat it." Mister Five demanded. The dinosaur then rushed him and Miss Valentine.
"I'll handle this." Miss Valentine then jumped into the air, "Ten thousand kilogram press!" she yelled as she crushed the dinosaurs head under her weight. With the animal dealt with they proceeded towards the house. As they entered, they were greeted by Mister Three.
"Hello Mister Three, you have a talent of turning the most savage environment into a home. I admire you, which is why I feel compelled to remind you two that this is our mission." Mister Five explained.
"Rest assured we will not fail again." Miss Valentine said in agreement.
"Fail again? That's not why I'm here, I have my own mission regarding the one who defeated you and to hunt some truly big game." Mister Three explained while presenting an old wanted poster to Mister Five and Miss Valentine.
"Dory the blue ogre and Broggy the red ogre of the warrior giant pirates." Mister five read off the poster
"Everyone's heard of them, they're ancient legend. Hey, this poster is over a hundred years old." Miss valentine said in response.
"Oh, I assure you, those legends are alive and well, here on this island, battling out for over a century. Back when that poster was new their bounty was one hundred million belli a piece." Mister Three explained.
"Well, two hundred million belli is an impressive sum. But that still doesn't change the fact that their giants." Mister five replied.
"There's a wise saying, superior criminals are those that execute their crimes using superior intellect. Just follow my precise instructions and you'll find for this mission of foresight and perseverance you can find the solution to even the most gargantuan of obstacles." Mister Three explained.