CHAPTER 52

"Here please." Marcos said to Sarah, who was thoroughly bewildered as she parked the car. Marcos had not said a single word during the nearly 30 minute car journey, other than to direct her to the location he wanted to go to. He hadn't told her where they were going. He hadn't told her why. So Sarah was perplexed as he directed her further and further out of the city, past any traces of civilization until they were literally off-road and were driving through a forest. If Sarah didn't know him any better, she would've thought he was driving her out here to kill her. She had no clue what they were doing here, especially not when Marcos told her to park the car and Sarah looked out the window to see that they were on the edge of a meadow.

The couple stepped out of the car together and hand in hand, Marcos led her through the meadow. As he did so, even this most somber of times, Sarah couldn't help but appreciate the beauty of this gorgeous location. It was so tranquil, so removed of all of the troubles of the big city. Birds were able to sing freely. Flowers and trees of all colors were able to bloom without being terrified of being cut down. The grass was long and lush. However, they did not stick around to gaze at the beauty of their surroundings. Marcos clearly had somewhere he needed to be, so all Sarah could do was follow him as they walked through the meadow, all the way to the far side of it. That's when Sarah saw it…

On the other side of the meadow from where they had parked, was a tall, towering, mighty tree. It provided a shade for everything beneath it, not that they needed it in mid December. With the way the branches hung downwards, it was almost like the tree had built a seclusion for itself from the rest of the meadow. As Sarah looked at the tree, she saw that someone had carved a message into it with a knife or blade of some kind…

Maria Oliviera

Loving mother and wife

February 11th 1975 - 23rd December 2015

Rest in Peace

All of this was written inside a large heart that had been carved into the bark of the tree. There were no guesses to who had written all of it, as Sarah could tell from her boyfriend's expression that this was far from the first time he had been around here. Not only had this message been lovingly carved into the tree, but this seemed to be an area densely populated with multi-colored flowers, almost as if someone had taken the effort to plant them himself and water them regularly.

"I made it when we first got here." Marcos finally spoke up, beginning to explain. "The thing that I hated the most about leaving Rio is that I had to leave her behind. She was resting in the meadow where we buried her, and obviously I couldn't exactly take that with me, so I figured this was the next best thing."

"It's beautiful." Sarah whispered as she held Marcos hand firmly in her own and felt him almost lean against her for support.

"It's not much." Marcos admitted. "But whenever I miss her, I always come here. Whenever I'm in this beautiful meadow, I always think that this is what heaven is like, so I always feel closer to her here."

Sarah silently nodded, taking in what Marcos was telling her.

"I feel like she would've loved it here. In America. It was always her dream to move here to get me a better life. She always told me that one day, I'm going to move to one of the big cities - New York, L.A, Vegas - and I'm going to become a superstar. She was the first person, the only person, who really believed that I could become a professional fighter."

"She was right. You are going to become a star." Sarah whispered. Marcos nodded.

"Whether I do or don't, that doesn't change the fact that I'm here and she's not. And that fact is just so fucking unfair. Why is it me who's still here while she isn't? Why wasn't it me who was taken? Her death was my fault! My fucking fault!"

"Marcos, there's no way you could've known…" Sarah told him, but Marcos shook his head vehemently.

"No. I should have known." Marcos demanded harshly. "But even with that aside… it's still my fault."

Sarah did not press further, although her eyes silently questioned him about what he meant by that. Marcos took a deep breath, blinking tears out of his eyes, before he began to speak.

"You know, when I was in fifth or sixth grade, there was this book we had to read in class. It was a Portuguese translation of Wonder by R.J Palacio, and it was our homework for the month to read it. I still remember it vividly… that yellow binder with black text, it sat on my shelf every day for that entire month, untouched. I hadn't read a single page by the time the month had come to an end, and what's worse… we had a test, a really big test, on it the very next day. I was terrified. Nervous as hell. I couldn't sleep or anything. My mom's going on about how I should have been better organized when suddenly, I just burst into tears right there. Immediately, she stops yelling at me and she calms me down. She then tells me 'look, don't worry about it. Go to your room now, rest your head on your pillow, and think about something you love or are excited about that's coming up.' So I did that. And the next morning, I wake up and I'm about to leave for school because I figured my mom's already gone to work for the day. She isn't though. She's in the kitchen and she tells me to wait up, because she's going to walk to school with me. Right now, I'm beginning to stress again about the test we had that day. And on the way to school, she talks me through the entire book like it's a bedtime story or something. Because she had stayed up all night, the whole night, reading the whole damn thing. Because she didn't want her little boy stressed out over some stupid, silly test. And you know what? I ended up getting an A. My first A all year, and it was all thanks to her."

All Sarah could do right now was listen. She didn't dare interrupt. Her boyfriend so seldomly opened up and talked about anything this deep, especially not about his upbringing growing up, so she didn't want to cause him to retreat back into his shell for whatever reason.

"She was a good mom." Marcos whispered, his voice cracking a little as he thought about her. "She was a really, really good mom. And you know what… I don't think she knew that. I think that if she knew just how great of a mom she was, how amazing she was at stuff she didn't even show that much care at being good at, I don't think she would've done what she did. And I wish… I wish I would've told her. I wish I would've told her more. I should've fucking told her more."

At this point, Marcos' voice trailed off as his emotion took over, and he slowly sat down on his knees, staring at the make-shift headstone, silently sobbing into his hands. He was almost ashamed for Sarah to see him like this. He was so… broken. So damaged. He didn't belong with someone like her. She deserved so much better, and he honestly wouldn't blame her if she turned on her heel and left right now, left to be with someone who wasn't so much of a mess. That wasn't what she did though. She did the exact opposite. Moving to sit on her knees opposite him, Sarah wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into another embrace, gently caressing the back of his hair with one hand, whispering reassurances into his ear. She told him that it wasn't his fault. Because it wasn't. Her heart shattered seeing him like this. This was the exact opposite of the spirited, passionate person who she had fallen in love with. But that didn't mean that she was going to leave though. She stayed exactly where she was, because with him was the only place she wanted to be.

Eventually, Sarah managed to calm Marcos down a little, and as he gently moved himself away from her embrace, he stood up again so him and Sarah were both staring down at the shrine to his mother once again.

"She would've loved you." Marcos murmured, affection and affection managing to seep into his previously heartbroken tone as he spoke to the girl standing beside him. Sarah glanced sideways at him as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Well if she was anything like her son, I'm sure I would've loved her too." Sarah replied quietly. Marcos turned so that him and Sarah were standing face to face, their fingers still intertwined, as he spoke again.

"After my mom passed, I made a vow." Marcos told her. "I swore that I would never let anyone in my life go without knowing how much I cared about them. I swore that I would always tell the people in my life how much I care about them, because I don't know how they might be hurting inside. Because I don't know how much they might need to hear that someone cares about them. 'Cause life… it can get real hard sometimes. It can really hit you harder than any physical beating. And ever since her death, I lived up to this vow. Made sure my friends and family knew how loyal I was to them, knew how much I cared about them. However, there is someone I haven't been completely honest with about my feelings, out of fear… you, Sarah."

Marcos hesitated for a moment before continuing.

"Sarah, I love you." Marcos blurted out. Sarah's ocean-blue eyes widened. "You don't have to say it back, don't worry. I know we haven't been dating for that long. And I totally understand if after this, you don't want to speak to me again. But I love you. It's something I felt on the first day we spent together, and something I've felt every day since. I've broken my vow about letting people know how much I care about them until now, because I was scared of how you'd react. I'm still terrified to be honest. But I'm done lying about my feelings, done trying to hide them. Because I'm not going to let the mistakes that happened with my mom happen to you too. I love you, Sarah."

After Marcos had finished professing his feelings, there was a short silence that for him felt like an eternity. Sarah's face was white with shock.

"I'm… um… I'm gonna go…" Marcos stammered, and he started to turn and walk away through the meadow, but he was stopped when he felt Sarah grab the sleeve of his jacket and turn him back towards her. She leaned in and kissed him, before breaking apart to finally speak after getting over her shock.

"I love you too…"

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

That night, they drove back into the city without saying much else. The sun had begun to set, so after saying his goodbyes to his mom, Marcos had decided that it was time to leave. They didn't speak much for the entirety of the car ride back, and by the time they arrived, the sun had completely set, the stars and moon taking over the duties of the resting sun. It was only when they made it back to what seemed like L.A that Sarah spoke up.

"You're more than welcome to stay over at my place if you don't want to be alone tonight." Sarah told him. Marcos smiled faintly at her and shook his head.

"Thank you. But I, uh… I should be getting home." He replied. "My dad should have gotten back from work by now and I want to make sure he's okay as well."

Of course. Because while Marcos had lost his mother 5 years ago, it shouldn't be forgotten that on the same day, his father had lost his wife. Marcos' mom's death had hit the 13 year old really hard, but if it was even possible, it had affected his father even more drastically. It was like he had become an entirely different person after Marcos' mom's death.

Their family's lives had never been easy. There was no doubt about that. Marcos' dad had been working insanely long work shifts, day-in and day-out, with very little reward in terms of pay, for as long as he could remember. He wasn't college educated, so he had begun working as a teenager and never stopped for even a moment. But despite all of this, despite the financial strain and the hardships they had to go through, Marcos' dad would never let it affect him. As he said, it wasn't what was important in life. What was important in life was family, and he had both his high school sweetheart as his wife, and a carbon copy of himself in his young son. The man used to be so full of life, not unlike his son. He used to not let any of their hardships take away from his sense of humor, his zest for life, his desire to be with and spend what little time he got off with his family.

However, after his wife's death, everything had changed. It was almost as if all of these incredible traits inside him had been like a light, and that light had died when his wife had died. It had been permanently disguised, leaving behind only a deeply troubled man. One who hated almost everything about his life and made his feelings known. A man who was extremely tough, and never let himself feel an iota of pleasure.

It pained Marcos to see him that way, and he knew that as hard as today was for him, it was bound to be harder for his father. 5 years to the day without the woman he thought he'd be spending the rest of his life with. And unlike Marcos he couldn't even mourn her, as he had been stuck in work all day today.

They arrived at Marcos' apartment in Panorama City a little while later, and when Sarah brought the car to a halt opposite the apartment complex, she turned to him.

"Do you want me to come inside and help?" Sarah asked him, already knowing what his answer was going to be. Marcos, as expected, shook his head.

"No, thank you though. I think my dad would probably be more comfortable if it was just me and him." Marcos replied. If only. If only he had said yes. If he had just accepted Sarah's offer for her to come inside with him, maybe everything that happened next in the coming month wouldn't have happened…

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

When Marcos walked into the apartment, the place was pitch-black. He almost thought his father was already asleep in his room, or he hadn't come back yet from work or something. However, there was a sign that he was awake that Marcos noticed as he stepped further into his apartment. There was a single light on in the corner of the living room, a dim candle that illuminated the man sitting in the chair in the corner of the room. Marcos couldn't see whether he was asleep or not at the beginning. He had to squint through the living room and move a little closer to find his answer.

"Dad…" Marcos said quietly, trying to get his dad's attention.

What he realized next is that his dad was awake. Just really, really, really drunk. He was cradling a bottle of vodka in his hands, taking sips of it like a baby would their bottle, mumbling and muttering incoherently. Marcos looked at his father sympathetically. He couldn't even imagine the anguish the man was feeling right now.

"Come on, dad. Let's get you to bed." Marcos said kindly, walking over to his father and helping him up. He then tried to take the vodka bottle away from him, but his dad instantly recoiled.

"No! I'm keeping it!" His dad slurred, inebriated. Marcos sighed.

"Dad, you've had a lot to drink. Why don't you get some rest?" Marcos suggested. His dad shook his head and jerked the bottle away from Marcos's grasp.

"No! Fuck off!" His father snapped back, barely able to stand upright in his drunkenness. Marcos didn't though. He continued to try and help his dad, moving in one more time to try and get the bottle away from his dad, and get the man over to his room to sleep it off.

"Dad, come on. I…" Marcos never got to finish his sentence.

What happened next was a complete and utter shock for Marcos. Something he never in a million years saw coming. His father's level of drunkenness did not at all affect the speed and power with which he suddenly swung his fist at his son, clobbering the teenager across the face as hard as he could.

"ARGH!" Marcos cried out in pain, stumbling backwards and seeing stars from the sheer power of the punch. Decades of Martial Arts had made that punch feel like a blow from a double barrelled shotgun, and the shock factor of it all only added to it. He felt like he had just been doused with an entire bucket of frigid water, and he was now immobile to the spot in shock. His father had just hit him! Hit him! That was something he never, ever, EVER could have imagined happening. His father was a tough guy, sure. His father was a brutal Martial Artist back in his day, sure. But this… this was something he never could've predicted.

Marcos did not stick around for any longer. Turning on his heel, Marcos sprinted into his room and slammed and locked the door behind him, leaving his father in the living room behind him…