Anna roamed the corridors of the castle with a fast pace, happily humming a tune while she held the list of her wedding's guests in her hand.
She walked past a maid and smiled at her.
"Hi, have you seen Kai, by any chance? I'm looking for him to talk about the table plan."
The maid nodded. "Sure, ma'am. He's selecting wine, you'll find him in the cellar."
Anna smirked. She couldn't wait to taste his selection. "Thanks!"
The woman bowed, and the Queen strolled to the staircase that went down to the lower levels of the castle.
The more she walked downstairs, however, the more she realized that in her haste, she had completely forgotten that this area had no windows, since it was underground. She gasped when she saw the deep darkness she gradually plunged into. Several turns of stairs further and lower, she almost was in complete dark.
Her heart started to beat fast in her chest, threatening to burst out, and she should burst out as well, her instinct screaming at her to walk back. But she had to continue; she needed to talk to Kai, and he likely would spend the following hours in the cellar...
Anna hesitated for a moment, her pace slowing down, until she saw some light at the end of the staircase. With a relieved sigh, she joined it, and met Kai and several maids in the large cellar. One of the women was holding a candelabra, and the other a crate of the best wines of the region. Kai was attentively reading the labels and checking his notes. They all lifted their heads and made a bow when she entered.
"Your Majesty." Smiled the butler. "I'll be with you shortly. I just have to check something."
Anna smiled at him, indicating that she would wait. However, to her horror, she saw him gesture to the maid who held the only light in the room to follow him, and he indicated the spot in the wall where the crate came from. She helped him see the collection of bottles in this specific spot, and therefore the candelabra didn't light the part of the room where Anna was in anymore.
The Queen gulped, and found out that she couldn't really; her heart was beating fast in her ears, and she started to feel dizzy. The only light she saw now were flashes in her mind as images of that night in that horrible cave assaulted it, and she clenched her eyes shut. It made things worse when clear visions came to her, and she pressed her lips to hold a whimper.
She forced herself to open her eyes and see the dark room again, just in time for Kai to walk back to her. He took a few more notes, then lifted his head to her.
"What did you want, Your Majesty?" He smiled.
Anna breathed with difficulty. She wanted to escape, to go out, now. Right now.
"N-nothing."
The man frowned. "Surely there was something. You didn't come just to say hello." He smiled, to ease Anna's nerves a bit. He knew her for many years now, literally since the day she was born, and meant only well.
She however refused to say anything; not that she didn't want to, but because she couldn't.
"Nevermind." She said clumsily, and she bowed to him and the maids present to climb back the stairs. She dissimulated her hurry as much as possible, but was certain that they noticed her panic. It only aggravated the feeling in her heart. Not only did she blame herself for still being marked by that night, but she hated to know that all the staff was aware of it.
As soon as she reached the upper floor and the windows of the room shed light on her again, she took a big breath in and out. Her heart was drumming in her chest and her throat squeezed like she was about to cry. She forced herself not to, and made her way to the corridor, clenching to the paper in her hand, not paying attention to how precious it was anymore.
She stopped on the carpet. She glanced right and considered joining Kristoff in the courtyard for his own preparations. Then glanced left and preferred to go to her study first.
It wasn't the first time she had post traumatic stress disorder. It happened more times that she dared to admit. And she had made a promise to herself when it last happened; the next time she would find herself paralyzed...
With a fast pace, Anna headed to her study, closed the room behind her, and put her paper on the desk. She sighed a bit at its state and tried to flatten its wrinkles on the wood, then hurriedly sat and took out letter paper from one of the drawers.
She grabbed a pen from the box on the desk, and opened one of the inkwells to dip the end in it. She was a bit hasty in her moves, and forced herself to calm down as she hovered her pen above the paper to write correctly.
The redhead took a long breath in and out, then started to write.
"Elsa,
We need to talk.
As the guardian of the river of memories and my best confidant, I think that it's important for you to know.
I want to ask Pabbie to make me forget that night in the cave."