The remainder of the summer seemed to quickly speed by. Hermione spent her days helping Ab around the pub, and her nights coping with the reality of never returning to her old life. She tried to remember that she was in this timeline for a reason, and that the future would be brighter, full of love and happiness for whichever children came to be, but it still pained her to think that the memories she shared with Harry and Ron would never come to pass.
Once a week, she would trek up to the castle and meet with the headmaster, who insisted she referred to him as Uncle Albus, though the notion of such still made her mildly uncomfortable. They would discuss the possibility of other horcruxes, and how many they believed Voldemort had currently.
Dumbledore was convinced that he had at least five. Hermione had the replica locket in her bag and the note from R.A.B., as Harry didn't trust bringing it to the Dursley's, and Dumbledore recognized the insignia as that of Salazar Slytherin's. Hermione suggested it was because he was the heir of Slytherin, but Dumbledore thought it ran deeper. He was convinced it had to do with the school itself.
"Hogwarts was the one place Tom Riddle ever felt at home," he explained, "He was an orphan, ridiculed by his peers, abandoned by his family. This school was where he finally found himself, and decided he belonged somewhere. Tom never made friends here, but he had followers, he gained power, he built connections. Hogwarts was the birthplace of Lord Voldemort. I believe there is more to him using Slytherin's locket as a horcrux than just his lineage. I think, perhaps, he could have decided to use something from each of the founders. Or, at least, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. Tom never did fancy Gryffindor."
"Are there known artifacts from the founders?" Hermione asked, "I know Gryffindor has his sword, but Harry used the sword to defeat the monster in the chamber of secrets. I don't think a horcrux would let him do that."
Dumbledore nodded, looking to the sword, displayed beautifully in a case on the wall in his office. "The sword would not be a horcrux. I believe we can rule that out. But for the other founders, Helga Hufflepuff was known to have an enchanted chalice, though it was sold at auction many years ago. I am unsure of its current whereabouts. And there is the Lost Diadem of Rowena Ravenclaw."
"The Lost Diadem?"
"Mm, yes. Not a soul alive has seen it, though I wouldn't put it past Tom to have found it. It is said that the diadem brings the wearer great knowledge and wisdom. I doubt even he could stand to ignore such power."
Hermione left the headmaster's office with much to think about. She wished she had been able to ask Harry more questions before she had been sent back in time. She wished she had been quicker on her feet and less trusting of Snape. She should have stunned him as soon as she saw him. Perhaps done worse. Logically, she knew that it was Dumbledore's wishes, but it pointed out a weakness that she would need to work on, less someone more dangerous came along to exploit it.
No, Hermione could no longer just be the brains in the operation. She needed to learn how to fight. She had to be able to stick up for herself and hold her own if she had any hope of bringing down Voldemort and destroying his horcruxes. She was so used to Harry taking the lead, being the protector, while she stayed on the sidelines and came up with a plan to get them out of their mess, but she needed to be able to fight back now.
Steeling herself in her resolve, Hermione made her way to the library. The headmaster had given her a free pass to the restricted section, much to Madam Pince's dismay, as the librarian did not yet know the care in which Hermione treated books. Hermione scoured the shelves, pulling every text on defensive and offensive magic she could find and began taking notes. She analyzed spells, their incantations, wand movements, counter curses, and their origins.
Certain spells made her skin crawl. The kinds of torture described in some of the darker books were beyond anything she had ever imagined. The worst part was that she knew that these were the sanitized books. The really dark books, the ones with curses that would make her physically ill to read about were locked away in the Death Eater's manor homes. Taught to their pureblood children, instructed to use on mudblood girls like her.
But here, she wasn't a mudblood. She was a half-blood. Hermione was the daughter of a witch and a wizard, bringing her more standing than she had before, though the target on her back was just as big as the one in her original life. Here, instead of being Harry Potter's muggle-born best friend, she was Albus Dumbledore's niece, the leader of the light.
She was a blood traitor and actively working to defeat Voldemort. Once she graduated, she would be welcomed into the Order of the Phoenix, but as it stood in that moment, she was already doing as much, if not more than most Order member in the fight against the Death Eaters.
Checking out some of the less suspicious book and putting away the darker tomes, Hermione made the familiar trek up to the seventh-floor corridor to the Room of Requirement. She paced back and forth three times and smiled at what she saw when she entered the small door the room had provided.
Inside was a smaller version of the training room that they had used when practicing for Dumbledore's Army. The armored dummies who could shoot basic stinging hexes, the padded flooring, and the mirrored walls were just what she needed to start working on her basic combat skills.
Hermione started with some basic stretches, as she knew it was going to be a long night. She sent Ab a quick Patronus and let him know she'd be back late.
The first of September rolled around far quicker than Hermione was prepared for. She debated going to King's Cross and taking the train but decided against it. She was already at the castle and it seemed rather silly to go all of the way to London just to sit on a train for six hours to come straight back.
She spent the morning helping Aberforth around the pub and doing some last-minute shopping in the village, making sure she had all of her supplies. Aberforth had taken her shopping in Diagon Alley the other week and he had stopped in the Leaky for a pint while she dipped into a muggle department store quickly to pick up some basic clothes.
Hermione passed by the Magical Menagerie and felt her heart reach out to Crookshanks who she had left with Ginny at the end of sixth year. She missed her half kneazle and considered perhaps getting another familiar, but the hole in her heart was still too fresh and she decided to hold off for the time being.
Sighing and knowing the time was drawing near, Hermione decided to bid farewell to Aberforth and begin making her way up to the castle.
"Thank you for all you've done, Ab." Hermione said, smiling at the man she had now grown quite fond of.
"Think nothing of it, girl." He said, pulling her in for a hug, "My damned brother brought you into this mess, it's the least I could do."
"I still appreciate it."
"I know," Ab smiled, "Now get up to the castle, the train will be pulling in any minute."
Hermione nodded and shrunk her trunk down to pocket size before making her way towards the station. She dropped her trunk off by the carriages, knowing the elves would deliver it safely to her dormitory. She could see the faint steam from the train in the distance and began making her trek up to the castle.
The September air was refreshing against her skin. She was clad in her Gryffindor uniform, which wasn't too different from that of her time. The cut varied slightly, and the shade was a little more grey than black, but she felt comfortable in the familiar fabric. Hermione twirled her wand between her fingers as her legs carried her up the familiar path.
She saw a grey and black tabby watching her curiously from the gates of the castle as she approached them, the village shrinking behind her.
"Hello Professor McGonagall," she smiled, "Are you ready for another year at Hogwarts?"
Hermione watched as her favorite professor transformed before her eyes. She looked younger than Hermione had known her to be. She had yet to meet her in this time period and was looking forward to their reunion.
"You must be Miss Dumbledore," her professor stated, "Albus has told me all about you."
Hermione noted the emphasis McGonagall placed and nodded. Dumbledore trusted her. This didn't surprise Hermione in the slightest. She was an Order member in her own time as well.
"Has he?" She asked, "Well I look forward to further making your acquaintance, professor. Transfiguration has always been my best subject."
McGonagall nodded, "Well, you best be getting along now, I see the carriages coming up the hill. You've been sorted, yes? You'll be one of my lions?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Good. Run along."
Hermione smiled and continued on her way. She made it to the main entrance of the castle at the same time as the rest of the carriages and got lost in the sea of students mingling with their friends they hadn't seen all summer long. She found solace in the fact that no one noticed the new girl yet as they all filtered into the Great Hall and began taking their seats at their respective house tables.
She lingered back slightly to see if she could spot any familiar faces amongst the crowds of students but found it difficult to try and decipher who was who as she would have known these people as adults, not as school children. It wasn't until she locked eyes with a familiar mop of messy black hair that she felt her heart clench in her chest.
Harry.
No. James.
Hermione watched as James Potter, so like his son laughed with his friends, pushing, and shoving as they ran to take their seats at the table. She immediately recognized the handsome face of Sirius Black, very much alive and not yet marred by years in Azkaban. She also sought out the kind face of Remus Lupin, scarred and reserved, but still jostling around with his friends.
Hermione felt fury beyond belief when she saw the fourth boy trailing after them. Shorter and plumper than the rest of them, slightly less rodent like than the last time she saw him, but eyes still beady and watery just as they were in her time. Peter Pettigrew trailed after the rest of the boys and Hermione resisted the urge to kill him on the spot. She knew, logically, that the boy hadn't done anything yet. But the knowledge of the harm he would do was eating at her.
She steeled herself, taking a deep breath, before putting a bright a smile on her face, and proceeded to walk forward towards the boys and a group of girls joining them who looked to be about their age as well.
"Hello," she said, "may I join you?"
"And who might you be?" Sirius asked, propping his chin on his hand, batting his eyes at her, clearly trying to flirt. "I haven't seen you around here before, and I know all of the girls in Hogwarts. Especially the Gryffindors." He eyed her red and gold tie at her neck.
"Ignore him," Remus chimed in, knocking the hand that was propping up Sirius's head out of the way, causing him to fall, "I know I do. I'm Remus Lupin. Please sit. This is James Potter and Peter Pettigrew." He said, nodding to the two other boys. "That nuisance there is Sirius Black. What's your name?"
Hermione tried not to let her anger and disgust at seeing Peter visibly show, so she instead plastered a smile upon her face and focused on James instead, her heart panging at the similarities to Harry. She saw what so many people had said throughout the years, how he looked so much like his son, though Hermione could point out some major differences that distinguished the two.
James was taller than Harry, slightly broader as well, though he still retained the leanness that came with being a quidditch player. Hermione chalked this up to James not being malnourished as a child, as she knew the Dursley's never treated Harry right, loathe as he was to admit it. James had a bit more of an angular face as well. When she spotted a willowy, beautiful, red headed girl sitting a few seats down, Hermione caught a glimpse of the familiar green of her eyes and knew it must have been Lily. Hermione could see the gentleness in her face that translated greatly into her son's. While everyone seemed to focus in on the eyes, there was a distinct softness that Lily passed on to Harry that James did not possess.
"I'm Hermione," She said to the group, appeasing their curiosity, "I'm new this year."
"I didn't realize Hogwarts took exchange students," said a pretty blonde girl sitting next to Lily, reaching her hand over to shake Hermione's, "I'm Marlene McKinnon. Nice to meet you."
Hermione took her hand with a smile, not recognizing the name, but vaguely recognizing the face from the photo of the original Order they had hanging up during their fifth year.
"I think I'm a bit of an odd case, but I'm glad to be here." She said with a smile before being introduced to Mary Macdonald, a beautiful girl with rich dark skin and riotous curls that put Hermione's own to shame.
Hermione quickly exchanged niceties with the rest of the table, greeting Lily, and another girl named Alice Brown along with a shy boy named Frank Longbottom that she immediately recognized to be Neville's parents. She remembered the last time she had saw them, rotting away at St. Mungo's courtesy of Bellatrix Lestrange. She vowed to herself to not allow that to happen again. Neville was to have his parents this time around, that is if Neville were to be born in this version of events.
Hermione's melancholic musing was cut short as Professor McGonagall marched in the newest batch of first year students through the Great Hall, pausing all conversation and lonesome thoughts.
The sorting went by quickly enough and the hat sang its merry song of unity and teamwork that it went through every year and the student body began to quiet down as the headmaster stood to give his speech before the feast began. Hermione felt dread, as she knew her "uncle" would call attention to her presence, when she wanted nothing more than to blend into the scenery of Hogwarts and try and make friends without the scandal of being related to the headmaster.
"Welcome back to another glorious year at Hogwarts!" Dumbledore announced. "The staff and I are looking forward to this year and cannot wait for what it brings. As always, Mr. Filch has a list of banned items he has available posted outside of his office for your perusal, and the forbidden forest remains forbidden.
"On a different note, while I have no doubt the Hogwarts gossip mill would have done the job for me, I'll save you all the trouble by announcing that we are welcoming an exchange student to our sixth-year Gryffindor class. If everyone would join me in kindly welcoming my very own niece, Miss Hermione Dumbledore, I'm sure she would feel most overjoyed. Hermione, please stand."
Reluctantly, Hermione stood trying her hardest not to wince at the whispers and clapping welcoming her to Hogwarts. Hermione had neglected to tell her new classmates her surname when she introduced herself to them, and now they were all staring at her with wide eyes. She knew she wouldn't have been able to keep her so called relation to the headmaster a secret, but to have it be announced at the welcome feast was a bit humiliating. She smiled and waved before quickly sitting down and attempted to not completely bury her head in her hands.
"You're Dumbledore's niece?!" Sirius cried, "I didn't know he even had a family!"
"Of course he has a family, Pads!" Remus interjected, "What, did you think he just spawned?"
"Maybe! I wouldn't put it past him."
Hermione glared at Sirius who quickly had the decency to look sheepish before smiling at her mischievously.
"So little Dumbledore," He asked, "Why are you just now gracing Hogwarts with your presence."
"Leave the girl alone, Sirius!" Mary called.
"It's fine," Hermione said, "I know people will be curious with my uncle being the headmaster and all. My mum home schooled me. She was a potioneer, so we traveled all around the world but she recently passed away so I came to live with my dad in Hogsmeade."
"I'm sorry for your loss," James said sincerely.
"Dumbledore has a brother in Hogsmeade?" Peter asked.
"Shut up, Pete!" Remus whacked him upside the head, "Not the time."
"It's fine," Hermione assured, though she thought his tact was lacking, "And thank you, James. But yes, Aberforth runs the Hog's Head. I helped him out this summer and got acquainted with the castle."
"Aberforth is your dad?" Sirius cried, "Wait! He's Dumbledore's brother? He never sells me Odgen's! I thought last year would be the year he would cave, but he just gave me a butterbeer. Do you think you could get him to give us some? You know, familial privileges and all."
"Not the time, Sirius!" Remus reiterated, thwacking Sirius's hand with his fork.
"Ow, Moony! Sorry…" Sirius said sheepishly, rubbing his reddened knuckle.
"So, what's it like being Dumbledore's niece?" James asked, changing the subject.
"I'm not quite sure yet," Hermione said honestly, "I only met him for the first time this summer. So far it has just been having tea together and him asking about my life, being overall jovial and mysterious. It seems about on par for what I've heard of him."
The rest of the Gryffindors nodded at her answer. Hermione was glad she didn't have to lie much. She figured the more truth she could weave into answers about her life, the easier it would be to keep up with the ruse of her cover story.
The rest of the feast passed with general questions about her life that Hermione was easily able to answer before the conversation shifted to how everyone spent their summers. Hermione noted the tension in Sirius's neck when Lily asked why he spent the entire summer at James's house, and the quick dismissal James provided in response.
Lily talked about her sister's marriage to her horrible new husband, and Marlene said she met an older muggle boy on her family trip to Paris and kissed him under the Eiffel Tower and it was extremely romantic until he pickpocketed the muggle euros from her back pocket when she thought he was trying to catch a feel. She said she was just grateful he hadn't snatched her wand as well and that it made for a fun story.
Hermione found that Marlene reminded her of Ginny, quick wit, and a fiery personality. Mary on the other hand was a sweet and slightly timid girl, though it seemed like the two girls were glued together at the hip. Hermione supposed opposites attracted and the two friends balanced each other. She also learned that Frank and Alice were an item already which pleased her greatly.
Her first chance to really speak to Lily was when she followed the rest of the sixth year Gryffindor's up to the tower after the feast.
"So, Hermione, how are you liking Hogwarts so far?" She asked, "You mentioned you've already explored the castle a bit over the summer?"
Hermione nodded, "Yes, thankfully Uncle Albus let me have a bit of free reign to get acclimated, though I haven't seen our rooms yet. I mostly just figured out the best routes to my classes and spent time in the library."
"What N.E.W.T.s will you be taking?" She asked.
"The basics of course, Transfigurations, Potions, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Herbology, and Charms, as well as Arithmancy, and Ancient Runes. I wanted to take Astronomy as well but the headmaster was worried I'd overwork myself."
Hermione neglected to mention that he was worried she wouldn't have time to focus on their extracurricular activities of bringing down a dark lord, but she didn't think she needed to share that information with Lily quite yet.
"We'll have most of our classes together then!" Lily exclaimed, "Though I'll be taking Astronomy instead of Herbology. I never did have a green thumb. I kill every plant I touch. Alice is brilliant with plants though if you're ever looking for a study partner for Herbology!"
"I'll keep that in mind." Hermione smiled, thinking of Neville's proclivity for plants.
"Here we are," Lily said, stopping outside of the portrait hole. "This is the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. Password changes once a week. This year it's Remus and I's job to come up with them. We're the prefects for our year. This week's password is 'chocolate frogs.' Remus took the lead on that one. The boy is obsessed with chocolates."
Hermione laughed and entered the common room behind Lily, the rest of the group having entered shortly before them. Immediately, the boys had claimed the familiar red sofa that occupied the space in front of the fireplace. Hermione tried not to think of the many nights she had spent sitting on that very sofa with a different group of Gryffindors as she followed Lily to join them.
"So, little Dumbledore," Sirius drawled as she settled into one of the armchairs nearby, "you said you were homeschooled before. What was that like?"
"It was mostly just my mum and I," Hermione said, choosing her words carefully and retaining each one to memory, not wanting to get caught in a lie down the line, "she often was on a hunt for her next big discovery or some rare ingredient, so I was usually left to my own devices with my books. I think I did alright though. I passed my O.W.L.s at least." She said with a shrug.
"Cheers to that," James said, "I can't imagine how hard N.E.W.T.s are going to be."
"I already have a study schedule written out." Lily replied.
"You do?" Hermione asked excitedly, "I have mine in my trunk, we'll have to compare!"
"Oh no!" Sirius cried dramatically, flopping over onto Remus's lap, hands covering his face. "There's another one of you!"
Hermione looked at him confused before glancing around to see the rest of the group rolling their eyes at Sirius's dramatics.
"The Swot Brigade." Remus explained, pushing Sirius off of him and watching with a satisfied smirk as he landed on the floor with a thump. "That's what he calls us at least. Sirius thinks Lily, Mary, and I are less than because we choose to actually study instead of just pulling pranks and flirting with anything that moves."
"Firs of all, ow. Second of all, there is more to life than books and grades, Moony. Last year you spent seventeen consecutive hours in the library. Seventeen! That is sixteen too many."
"I for one, agree with Sirius." Marlene said, taking his now vacated spot on the couch, using the still floor-bound Sirius as a footrest. "I studied all of five days last year and I managed to get seven O.W.L.s, and let's be honest, we all knew History of Magic was a lost cause as soon as I sat down to take that test."
"Hear, hear!" Cried Sirius.
"On that note," Lily said scowling, "Hermione, why don't I show you our dorm. Marley, Mary, are you coming?"
"Can I come?" Sirius asked.
Hermione laughed as Marlene tossed the throw pillow she was using at his head before following the rest of the girls up the stairs to their dorm. It was one floor down from where Hermione's previous rooms had been, but the layout remained the same. Five beds were situated around the circular room, each with their own wardrobe and nightstand. Hermione noted the A.B. on the trunk by the fifth bed and assumed Alice was off somewhere with Frank reconnecting from the summer holiday.
Hermione's trunk was assigned to one of the beds on either side of the window and she gladly claimed her new home. She unlocked her trunk and began the process of unpacking. She discreetly tried to pull some of her many books from her beaded bag out without the other girls noticing as, strictly speaking, the charms on her bag weren't necessarily legal. She decided to only take out the necessities, leaving the rest safely tucked inside of the bag for when she needed them.
Glancing around, Hermione watched as the other girls tacked up posters and pictures of friends and family on the walls around their beds and on their wardrobes. Hermione felt a sinking feeling in her gut, knowing she wouldn't be able to put anything on her walls. She thought that perhaps she would be able to acquire new memories and mementos of this new life. Knowing she had one picture, tucked safely in her bag of she, Harry, and Ron, one that she could never show anyone but it was there for when she needed it, she steeled herself to not let the lack of personal artefacts get to her.
"So, Hermione," Marlene said, plopping onto the end of Hermione's bed once they finished unpacking. "Crash course on Hogwarts gossip. Are you ready?"
Wide eyed, Hermione nodded. This part of being in a girl's dorm was one she was usually excluded from. Lavender and Parvati tended to close the curtains and whisper into all hours of the night, leaving Hermione alone to her books. She got a semblance of having girl friends with Ginny and Luna, but often times they were interrupted by Harry and Ron, or the occasional Death Eater.
"So, you met the boys in our year. Sirius is a terrible flirt, but he's harmless. I don't think he's actually gone on any dates with anyone since fourth year, right Mar?"
Mary nodded, "Which is weird because he used to try and make it a goal to take a different girl to Hogsmeade each weekend, but perhaps he's grown up a little."
"Doubtful," Marlene said with a laugh, "but whatever the reason, the female population of Hogwarts is better for it. Then there is Remus, who is the nicest person you'll ever meet but I don't think I've ever seen him try and flirt with anyone."
"I think he's just shy." Lily said.
Marlene nodded and continued, "Then there's Peter. He's in love with Mary, but he's a bit of a creep, so she avoids him. I don't blame her though; I'd be uncomfortable if someone was staring at me all day too."
"He's a nice boy, but God! All he does is stare at me in class, or conveniently end up at the library at the same time as me, or the courtyard. Or even the astronomy tower! I was on a date with Damocles Belby from Ravenclaw last year and Peter just happened to be wandering the corridors outside the tower after curfew! I don't get it!" Mary screamed into her pillow in frustration, "I don't know how he always knows where I am, but I'm so sick of it!"
Hermione felt her stomach sink in fury. She hadn't known Mary long, but the girl seemed extremely kind, and she knew the type of person Peter was. And Hermione knew exactly how Peter was able to find Mary whenever he wanted. She didn't know what she was going to do, but she knew something had to be done.
"And speaking of boys who are in love with people…" Marlene said, shifting from Hermione's bed to Mary's and rubbing a hand soothingly on her back.
"Ugh, not this again." Lily groaned, "James isn't in love with me. You're delusional."
Mary popped her head up from her pillow, "I'm 50/50 on that one, Lils. He used to be obsessed with you. But in a cute way, not a creepy stalker way like someone we know."
"Key word being used to," Lily said, "He hasn't asked me to Hogsmeade since last fall, nor has he even remotely shown interest in me beyond friendship since then. And you both know why."
"I'm confused," Hermione said, looking back and forth between Lily and Marlene. Mary was back to drowning herself in down feathers. "What happened?"
"James used to have a crush on Lily, but Lily's best friend was James's mortal enemy and James said he couldn't understand how Lily could be friends with someone like that."
"Marley!" Lily cried, throwing a pillow at her. "You make it sound so dramatic."
"It was dramatic!"
"I second that!" Mary said, before returning to the pillow.
"Ugh!" groaned Lily, "Severus used to be a nice boy."
"I highly doubt that." Marlene said with a ferocity Hermione had yet to see from her. "He called you a fucking slur, Lils! And threatened you! Then whined like a little baby when you wouldn't forgive him and kiss his wounds better. That greasy little bat deserved what he got."
"Yes, well." Lily sniffed, "I'm done with Severus this year. I ignored him all summer. I'm not going to start talking to him now. He made his bed with his little want to be Death Eaters, and he can lay in it."
"Death Eaters? At Hogwarts?" Hermione asked, trying to pry more information about the general student consensus. She had a basic understanding of the recruiting process that was happening within the castle walls. Dumbledore wasn't ignorant to it, but he wanted her to keep her ear to the ground and report back anything else she heard. She felt a little dirty using this clearly emotional moment for Lily as a time to get information, but when it came to stopping Voldemort, she was fine letting her moral compass shift a little south. "I thought everything was mostly just rumors at this point."
"Mum said it's getting worse out there," Marlene said. "Dad's been invited to a few lunches with people known to be darker. He's come up with an excuse every time, but my parents are starting to get worried they'll become targets. The McKinnon's aren't Sacred Twenty-Eight, but we're old enough and pure enough to be on their radar. Dad wants no part in it, of course, but saying no has consequences."
"The Slytherins have been getting more vicious too." Mary whispered.
Marlene gave Mary a look, asking a question with her eyes before Mary nodded in acceptance.
"Last year," Marlene started, taking a harrowing breath, "before Snape called Lily the M-word, Mary was attacked. Mulciber, a Slytherin seventh year snuck up behind her in the dungeons and cursed her. He used a blood-boiling curse. Thankfully I wasn't far behind her and was able to stun Mulciber and get her to Madam Pomfrey, but he could've killed her."
"I had to spend a week at St. Mungo's." Mary said sadly, "The curse made my heart swell and I still have complications. I get easily fatigued and have trouble breathing sometimes, not to mention the overall trauma from the whole thing. My healers have me on potions to help, but they don't know if I'll ever be back to normal.
"My parents are muggles," Mary explained, "so they were confused and didn't understand why someone would curse me just for being muggleborn. When I was at school, Madam Pomfrey was able to run my checkups, but during the summer holiday, I had to go to weekly checkups at St. Mungo's to make sure the potions were doing what they were supposed to and get refills. My family lives in York so we had to take the train to London since I can't apparate yet, and we live in a flat, so we've no floo connection either. My mum had to take off work every Wednesday, all summer long."
"Snape told Lily it was just a laugh." Marlene seethed, "That Mulciber almost killing her friend was just a fucking laugh! James heard what he said and hexed Snape, which is the usual between those two. They're like a cat and mouse, always going at each other. But then Lily told James to knock it off and…"
"And Severus called me a mudblood." Lily finished. "He said he didn't need a mudblood like me to defend him and I better watch out or I'd end up like Mary."
"Jesus," Hermione whispered, having heard the story of James bullying Snape from Harry after he accidentally slipped past his occlumency shields in fifth year, but having heard the full story, Hermione stood fully on James's side. While she didn't condone violence on a regular occasion, she would have hexed Snape, or worse, had she heard what he had been saying too. "I can't believe he did that. And Mary, I can't believe that happened to you. What happened to Mulciber?"
"Dumbledore expelled him, but he was already seventeen so the ministry didn't snap his wand." Mary explained.
"Fucking bastard," Marlene interjected. "Should've gone to Azkaban for what he did."
"Agreed." Lily said.
"On a lighter note," Marlene said, changing the subject, "Now that you've cut that slimy rat bastard Snape out of your life, now you and James can ride off into the sunset."
"Ugh!" Lily groaned again, 'I told you! He isn't interested anymore. And I'm not interested in him!"
"You're not?" Hermione asked, as the conversation was starting to worry her. She knew Harry's parents got together a little later in their Hogwarts career, but from the sounds of it, things were rocky where they stood.
"I like James, really I do, but not romantically." Lily explained, "I had thought that perhaps I maybe did, but ever since he stopped treating me like a potential girlfriend and just started treating me like a friend, I think I realized I just liked the attention he gave me. I don't know. James is great, amazing even, but I don't know if he's the one. I think if he were to ask me on another date, maybe I'd say yes, but I feel like we'd be forcing it. It seems like everyone just expects us to get together, and I'm not sure if that's what I want." Lily sighed and picked at her pillow, "Does that make sense?"
Hermione felt a sinking feeling in her gut, because yes, it made perfect sense. It was exactly how Hermione felt about Ron. She thought she liked him. She thought she could even love him, but the longer she saw him with Lavender, uncaring of her feelings, shoving her nose in their disgusting displays of public affection, Hermione started questioning if she truly liked Ron romantically, or if she was just expected to.
It seemed like everyone had this idea in their heads that Harry was to Ginny as Ron was to Hermione. They were meant to be, they just hadn't quite figured it out yet. Perhaps it was Mrs. Weasley's overbearing nature, pushing people into the directions she wanted, or maybe Hermione just thought she should be with Ron because it would be convenient, but the longer she analyzed her relationship with Ron, the more she realized she could only ever love him as a friend.
Ron was funny and kind, but he could be so obtuse and oblivious to how his actions impacted other people. She understood that he had to deal with the weight of five older brothers and constantly trying to measure up, but Hermione got sick of the constant parade of pity he boasted upon himself.
She needed a partner who cared about other people's needs, not just their own. Someone who could hold their own in a conversation with her and push back against her without alienating her and belittling her as Ron often did. While she doubted that was what James did to Lily, she understood the feeling of people expecting you to be together.
"I know exactly what you mean." Hermione said quietly, not fully wanting to admit it, for if she supported Lily in not pursuing James, she was potentially supporting Harry never being born. But Hermione had to recenter herself.
One of the things she had worked on over the last month was accepting that the future was fluid. She found herself especially struggling with that mentality as she met the parents of her old friends, but her presence had irrevocably changed the timeline. Clinging to what the future should be in her mind would only hinder the progress she could potentially make in stopping Voldemort and creating a better future for everyone. If that meant that her old life and loved ones had to be sacrificed, Hermione knew it was something she had to accept, though she didn't have to do it happily.
She spent all too many nights softly crying herself to sleep as she longed for the life she once had. She hoped being back at Hogwarts, surrounded by people her own age could possibly help bring her some solace, but she would have to wait and see.
"Well, this has been a depressing start to the year." Mary grumbled.
"Too right," Marlene agreed, hopping off of Mary's bed and climbing into her own. "And where the hell is Alice? Shagging her boyfriend in a broom cupboard already? God, I wish I was her."