039: Fools on Christmas Eve – Part [5] of the best Shizuka x Hachiman chapters I have ever written.
Hiratsuka Shizuka was an incredibly tolerable woman and she made it a habit of repeating this to herself whenever she saw a young couple walk right past her while displaying an ungodly amount of love and affection through both physical and vocal means without getting rebuked by any nameless stranger from a faceless crowd like it was usually expected in a busy shopping mall right at the middle of Chiba.
Everyone turned a blind eye to such a blatant display of public affection which was no longer limited to innocent hand holding and giving soft pecks on their lover's cheeks in between several cherished moments and by now most couple were only interested in rushing to a love hotel for a remarkable night to satisfy all of their wanton urges. As expected Hiratsuka Shizuka saw many high school couples frolicking around in such overindulgent exhibitions and once in a while she felt a sudden need to give them a thorough thrashing but a moment later she would change her mind and let them carry on their night of promised romance.
However one of her students, a certain Hikigaya Hachiman refused to partake in this celebration and continued to remain aloof from those obvious sidelong glances bestowed upon him by both of his female club mates. He was not exactly unintelligent by any capacity though he constantly obtained poor marks in both mathematics and science related subjects which baffled Hiratsuka Shizuka to a certain extent even after having him come over to her home during the weekends for their scheduled tutoring sessions, which she was happy to say, was helping him improve in his studies tremendously. But like his stagnant relationship with both his club mates there was always room for improvement in order to facilitate a healthy progression.
Hiratsuka Shizuka was here for them in every capacity but all three of them were reluctant to take a necessary step forward and their unwillingness was destroying their cherished camaraderie and though each and every one of them were equally culpable for ruining such a genuine connection of three grossly unalike individuals coming together from very different walks of life while carrying various mental baggages of their own making, there would always be one Hikigaya Hachiman and he would forever remain far guiltier than anybody else in their little group.
However, unbeknownst to Hiratsuka Shizuka gradually Hikigaya Hachiman was learning to share his guilt with another individual over time.
Hiratsuka Shizuka had forbidden Hikigaya Hachiman from coming to her apartment this evening for their scheduled tutoring session and she was hoping her wildest delusions would come true tonight and one of his club mates would express their feelings for him by taking advantage of this romantic night known for stealing kisses and unexpected confessions from unsuspecting love interests from both sides of the gender. Hiratsuka Shizuka was unlucky at her inability to sustain a relationship over a prolonged period of time and like last year she would be spending this Christmas Eve all by her lonesome while renewing her dalliance with an unhealthy amount of alcohol and a suffocating amount of cigarettes which would culminate into a terrible hangover when the sun rises the very next day. However she had taken into account their unlikely chance of running into one another which would result in an embarrassing situation and likely ruin a developing moment and hence she had taken certain necessary steps to steer clear away from their path to romance which not only included visiting a shopping mall located far away from her home but also resulted in her adopting a disguise which she was convinced would fool everyone of them even if them were standing a foot away from her and staring straight at her face.
"…Sensei, why are you dressed like a film noir detective?"
"Who said that!?"
Hiratsuka Shizuka looked to her immediate left and then to her immediate right like she was about to cross a heavily congested road known for many fatal accidents and having a death toll which would shame most traffic policemen into quitting their jobs but still she was unable to locate a single voice from amidst a swarming crowd of shoppers jostling about inside this busy shopping mall on the night before Christmas.
"Sensei, look over here."
"Where!?"
She followed this voice and when a gaggling crowd of shoppers slowly dispersed before her wondering gaze, a familiar pair of dead fish eyes caught her attention. Hikigaya Hachiman was standing fifteen feet away to her left, drowning in a pool of overly excited people and despite her disguise and their widening distance, he was correctly able to discern her identity among hundreds of other nameless and clueless individuals. Hiratsuka Shizuka waited for him to find his path and catch his breath before throwing him a question.
"How did you recognise me Hikigaya?"
"By your hair sensei."
Hiratsuka Shizuka subconsciously ran a hand through her long, black hair which fell over her shoulders and nearly reached her shins. A trench coat covered her body, a fedora was on top of her head and a dark pair of shades hid her eyes to bring together this makeshift disguise and like Hikigaya Hachiman said, her look was influenced by a hardboiled detective from a classic American movie. Only thing missing to perfect her appearance was a cigarette but due to strict fire safety protocols enforced by a number of serious mall cops, she had decided to forgo smoking altogether while shopping inside this busy mall. Her hair gave her away and she should have been unhappy at getting discovered by him but surprisingly enough she was experiencing a rather warm and special feeling which made her speak without thinking.
"Thanks Hikigaya."
"What are you thanking me for sensei?"
"N-nothing."
Hiratsuka Shizuka should have expected this from Hikigaya Hachiman. He was dumb regarding certain aspects and unlike her he would never understand this feeling of pride at her natural black tresses and their ability to capture his attention from other more colourfully dyed and stylised varieties of hair nowadays found among both teenagers and adults alike. Despite his phrasing this was not meant to be taken as a compliment like she accidentally did and to divert her attention back into commonplace subjects she put forth an unassuming query while removing her fedora and shades.
"Why are you here Hikigaya?"
"Because of Pan-san sensei."
"…Who?"
Hikigaya Hachiman squinted his eyes in annoyance, tilted his head to his right and roughly jerked it backwards and following his movement Hiratsuka Shizuka saw a banner hanging downwards from the third floor to the second floor of this shopping mall displaying a soft toy which was a black and white panda wearing a Santa hat and holding onto a candy cane. There was nothing unnatural about this stuffed animal except for it eyes which shared an uncomfortable similarity with her dead fish eyed student.
"Is that supposed to mean something Hikigaya?"
"I don't know sensei. I never asked her."
Hiratsuka Shizuka allowed his sentence to sink in completely into her psyche and she painstakingly went through every scenario which might make his utterance have a different meaning altogether. Hikigaya Hachiman had certainly made a reference to a girl and she was certain he was not talking about her. Everything pointed to date which she had clearly interrupted much to her chagrin and hence she decided to make amends by beating a hasty retreat.
"Alright then Hikigaya, I will be leaving now."
"Me too sensei."
Hiratsuka Shizuka took a couple of steps and then came to an immediate halt making Hikigaya Hachiman come to an abrupt stop right beside her. She will never be able to understand him and yet she bothered with him anyway. He obviously came here with a girl and now he was trying to leave with her without showing any consideration to his date. Hiratsuka Shizuka fiddled with her grocery bag and turned sideways to punch Hikigaya Hachiman in the gut for callously mistreating a girl by abandoning them on Christmas Eve.
Her fingers curled into a fist and she was moments away from striking him down out of her own misplaced anger and romantic frustrations but then she noticed him proffering a hand to her at her general direction which took her completely by surprise and made her uncurl her fist back into dainty little fingers. She was taken aback by this bold gesture of him wanting to hold her hand all of a sudden which was extremely forward of him and very much out of character for this socially stunted loner. Hiratsuka Shizuka hid her blush but she was unable to keep a certain level of coyness out of her voice.
"Y-you want something Hikigaya?"
"Your grocery bag sensei."
"My grocery bag?"
"Yeah sensei. I saw you fiddling with its strap a moment ago and I thought maybe it was getting a little bothersome for you to carry all those groceries around with you. So if you want, I can carry it for you, sensei."
"Al-lright then Hikigaya. Here you go."
Hiratsuka Shizuka dropped her grocery bag onto his outstretched hand in a brusque manner and then mentally berated herself for once again misreading an entire situation involving her student, Hikigaya Hachiman and getting flustered by one of his more endearing qualities. She had seen him carry bags for his kohai and student council president Isshiki Iroha on several occasions out of duties expected of a sensitive senpai but she had never expected him to show this polite gesture to her of all people. She now wondered whether both his club mates ever received such a gracious display of forgotten chivalry from him and amazingly enough she no longer cared about them anymore.
"Sensei you are getting left behind. Am I walking too fast for you?"
"Not at all Hikigaya. I was just wondering if I missed something."
"…On your grocery list?"
"Y-yeah, that's right! Some stuff on my grocery list."
Her voice trailed off in a warm sigh on this cold evening and her escaping breaths fogged her purple gaze which was fixated on his back. She refused to air certain unspoken thoughts pertaining to her easiness at walking with him in companionable silence and her sudden lack of an issue with his club mates getting purposely ignored by him due to their subtle advances. Hence, gradually, Hiratsuka Shizuka found herself getting delighted over spending her remaining evening with Hikigaya Hachiman without anticipating and participating in any forced exhibition of misguided, one sided feelings by exploiting Christmas Eve, the most romantic night in all of Japan.
However, a moment later, when she spotted a female student from Sobu High with waist length black hair which was tied by two red ribbons by both of her shoulders and a pair of angular blue eyes, her happiness faded away like smoke escaping from one of her cigarettes. This female high school student was standing on the third floor of this busy shopping mall with a lost look on her face and she was clutching onto a toy panda which Hiratsuka Shizuka recognised from the banner Hikigaya Hachiman had shown to her a while ago. Her voice was not bitter but there was a certain level of detachment to it when she addressed his back.
"Yukinoshita is waiting for you Hikigaya. You should go back to her."
"Don't worry about her sensei. She can take care of herself."
"Did something happen between you two?"
"Lots of things happened today sensei but right now I just want to avoid her."
"Alright then Hikigaya. I am with you."
Hiratsuka Shizuka watched Hikigaya Hachiman take a sharp turn away from this direction they were previously heading which stopped both of them from falling into the visual range of his service club president Yukinoshita Yukino. She noticed his voice held a hint of coldness while speaking about her and naturally she presumed their date had met with unsatisfying results and ended prematurely. Hiratsuka Shizuka followed Hikigaya Hachiman hoping to comfort him like any commendable teacher would do to a student suffering from their latest heart break.
She wanted to cheer him up and silently decided on buying him an innocent looking gift, devoid of any romantic undertones, to take his mind of Yukinoshita Yukino. While she perused through several displays on various stores selling merchandises at great discounts, her eyes landed on one of her students with shoulder length coral hair, a small portion of which was worn in a Chinese bun. This student of her was scurrying through the second floor of this crowded shopping mall while carrying a number of shopping bags and speaking rapidly into her phone with a very nervous expression. Hiratsuka Shizuka grew incredibly confused and spoke with subdued reluctance.
"I think I just saw Yuigahama right now. She might be calling you on her phone Hikigaya. Do you have it switched on?"
"No sensei. I turned it off just after I left them."
His blunt tone made her worried and she asked for more details even though this was slowly treading into meddlesome territories better left alone for only these three to figure out by themselves. But she gave into curiosity and put forth her question.
"Did she do something to ruin your evening Hikigaya?"
"No, she didn't sensei. She was just unlucky to be there."
Hiratsuka Shizuka saw Hikigaya Hachiman retrace his steps and move away from appearing directly below one of his classmate and service club member Yuigahama Yui. Moving beside him, she was able to see a fraction of hurt glimmer through his dead fish eyes before getting replaced by their monotonous purpose of staying alone and turning their back on everything and everyone. She was not certain but she supposed Yuigahama Yui might have been responsible for ruining his night out with Yukinoshita. All three of them had reached a cross road and now they were trying their level best to wedge their way through a number of complicated emotions to resolve their own relationship problems.
Hiratsuka Shizuka was unable to put a label on her own feelings towards these three but when she spotted one of her former students riding down an escalator with a fake smile plastered on her beautiful face, she grew completely stupefied and utterly puzzled about everything which has been happening since she met Hikigaya Hachiman earlier this evening.
"…Haruno?"
"Quickly sensei! Come inside. We have to hide."
"Wait a sec Hikigaya!"
Hiratsuka Shizuka had noticed Hikigaya Hachiman freezing up at the sight of Yukinoshita Haruno but she never expected him to grow this much terrified after just looking at her for a few seconds. His dead fish eyes grew comically large and he began to sweat despite the cold weather and without thinking he ran into an open door while asking her to come after him. She was quick to protest but she ended up following him and before they could realise both of them found themselves standing inside a café which was catering to mostly couples tonight in celebration of Christmas Eve.
Needless to say this teacher and student duo was not a couple.
Hiratsuka Shizuka was feeling extremely awkward inside this café full of lovers and Hikigaya Hachiman had made matters worse by asking a waitress to give them a table in the very back of this establishment while personally making a request to stop anyone from interrupting their privacy. As expected his words were grossly misinterpreted and taken out of context but their waitress had left them alone after taking their order with only a blush marring her features. Both of them had overcome their discomfort to a certain extent at this sudden change of atmosphere and unfortunately an inherent need to speak about all these latest developments had finally emerged over a small interlude involving coffee and cake. Like always Hiratsuka Shizuka was burdened with starting these types of discussions with Hikigaya Hachiman.
"What the hell is happening around here Hikigaya?"
"I don't know myself sensei but whatever it is, it's not my fault."
"Like hell it isn't! If it's not you then whose fault is it?"
"The fault of our failing education system sensei."
Hiratsuka Shizuka calmly took a sip from her cup of hot chocolate before she could pour it over his head out of a sudden burst of uncontrollable rage. Having Yukinoshita Yukino, Yuigahama Yui and Yukinoshita Haruno all under the same roof on Christmas Eve could never be passed off as a mere coincidence. When Hikigaya Hachiman stealthily bypassed two of them by purposely making some clever detours Hiratsuka Shizuka was a tad concerned at this loner falling prey to yet another sad setback but when he grew stupidly terrified after spotting Yukinoshita Haruno and took refuge in a café full of passionate couples, her concerns morphed into suspicion.
Yukinoshita Haruno was a former student of Hiratsuka Shizuka and Hikigaya Hachiman appeared unusually tense around her at all times but never before had she seen him display such an abject level of horror by only taking a glimpse at her. Having taught Yukinoshita Haruno during her stint at high school Hiratsuka Shizuka was no stranger to her manipulative tricks and ulterior motives but they never did warrant such a dramatic reaction from anyone. But then again having been her teacher and afterwards, staying in contact with her, made Hiratsuka Shizuka immune from most of her mind games.
Unlike Hikigaya Hachiman she only saw Yukinoshita Haruno as a mere nuisance and hence she had no patience over his fears surrounding her and furthermore she was unamused at his intention of placing blame on an education system in which she participated wholeheartedly.
"What does our education system have to with this Hikigaya?"
"Everything sensei. High school students are given outrageous assignments and reports to complete by their respective teachers and when they force a topic which has nothing to do with imparting knowledge then their practices become nothing more than a shallow power trip."
Hiratsuka Shizuka stabbed a strawberry sitting innocently on top of her sponge cake and chewed it carefully while pondering her next action which included torturing him to death at his rude generalisation of her entire teaching profession. But sadly it was the season of forgiveness and she was curious about his latest tirade. Moreover she had nothing better to do back home and therefore wasting her time over a meaningless chat with Hikigaya Hachiman felt like a wonderful change of pace. However she had to teach Hikigaya Hachiman a lesson on correctly reiterating a story to an invested listener. She licked her spoon clean before pointing it harmlessly at him with a sweet smile which gave him ample motivation to continue.
"Hikigaya, start making sense before I gouge your eyes out with this spoon."
"A-ah alright sensei. Give me a moment."
As expected Hikigaya Hachiman took a nervous gulp from his cup of coffee to wet his throat and moisten his lips before he could narrate his string of misfortune and miseries like a proper veteran loner. He began in his typical weary monotone.
"A couple of days ago, during service club hours, Yukinoshita was telling Yuigahama about a difficult report which her class was asked to submit by their homeroom teacher after Christmas. Apparently Yukinoshita was having trouble completing this project and she was wondering whether Yuigahama could help her regarding certain aspects. As expected Yuigahama was of no help to her and my services were required which led to this unlucky evening full of anarchy and chaos. And all of this could have been avoided if her homeroom teacher did not give her a report to write about 'Commercial Significance of Christmas'."
Hiratsuka Shizuka was carefully listening to Hikigaya Hachiman but she had to admit that this ploy adopted by Yukinoshita Yukino was severely lacking in originality. Needless to say Yukinoshita Yukino wanted to spend Christmas Eve with Hikigaya Hachiman under the pretence of having him help her with her assignment and judging by the topic he mentioned she had already made plans about coming to this shopping mall beforehand. But this did not explain one thing.
"So you got stuck with helping Yukinoshita do her homework which involved coming into this shopping mall, am I correct?"
"Pretty much sensei. Now that I think about it maybe her choice was influenced by this huge sale of latest Pan-san merchandises taking place at this mall. Figures, she decided to kill two birds with one stone. Hm, I didn't know her obsession ran this deep. From now on I have to be careful about it."
Hikigaya Hachiman was a terrible story teller with his tendencies to ramble and get off topic but Hiratsuka Shizuka was able to bring him back to the crux of the matter.
"But where does Yuigahama come into this? You already said she was of no help."
"I never said she was of no help sensei. Yukinoshita said that and let me tell you, Yuigahama proved her wrong. She broadened our horizon so much. I never knew there were people who would spend so much time and energy over completely useless items just for the sake of cheap novelty. By the second half of our trip I was pretty much certain that Yuigahama Yui is the living-breathing embodiment of commercialism on Christmas."
Hiratsuka Shizuka listened to his narrative and came to a conclusion that love triangles do exists outside of movies and mangas. Both of his club mates wanted him for themselves but none of them wanted to jeopardise their established status quo. Hikigaya Hachiman remained oblivious either by his own choice or by their collective inexperience. However Hiratsuka Shizuka was certain of one thing and she wanted to hear it from his own mouth.
"So Hikigaya, it looks like you had a great time."
"Not at all sensei. In fact, I think I never had such a horrible experience since I got into an accident with a limousine which had me hospitalised for roughly three weeks."
Hiratsuka Shizuka blinked at his morbid way of comparing two unlikely scenarios. She had been informed of his accident by school authorities and at a later date, Haruno had told her all about the shared connection between both Yukinoshita and Yuigahama in this tragic incident which arguably ruined his chance to make a better life out of his high school experience. She knew Hikigaya Hachiman was a cynic with a twisted sense of logic and warped reasoning skills but having him draw such a grim parallel to today made her feel dread and now she was growing anxious.
"You are over exaggerating Hikigaya. What could Yukinoshita Yukino and Yuigahama Yui possibly do to make you feel this horrible?"
"…both of them took me dress shopping."
Hiratsuka Shizuka hid her smile behind her glass of hot chocolate. She could already picture both of his club mates dragging Hikigaya Hachiman into a store full of women's wear and him breaking into cold sweat upon getting asked to choose between various dresses to complement their wearer. She was surprised at both of their craftiness but at least they were coaxing him into new situation and making him choose between them both literally and figuratively. Hiratsuka Shizuka was unable to stop herself from giving a wry smile.
"Like I said Hikigaya, you are exaggerating this more than you should. This was quite harmless. Tell me what did they do next?"
"…they took me lingerie shopping."
Hiratsuka Shizuka was glad she had not asked him this question with her mouth full otherwise she might have choked to death over a small piece of cake.
"…Come again?"
"You heard me the first time sensei."
After a moment of uncomfortable silence she carelessly decided to continue this line of questioning and decided to ask him to reveal the identity of his tormentor. She had a good idea who this could have been but it was better to leave no room for any form of doubts to linger and create confusion.
"And whose idea was it to go there Hikigaya?"
"Her's."
"Her's who?"
"Yukinoshita Haruno."
Hikigaya Hachiman had accused her of playing a film noir detective before by taking into account her unusual choice of clothing but she had to admit this story of his really did make her feel like a genius level investigator solving a grave injustice and like any great investigator she already knew Yukinoshita Haruno was the culprit way before Hikigaya Hachiman said her name. Her reasoning was quite flawless since out of all the suspects she met this evening only Yukinoshita Haruno was capable enough to pull off such an audacious crime like forcing Hikigaya Hachiman to enter into a lingerie store.
Unable to keep a straight face from this ludicrous imagery Hiratsuka Shizuka burst into a loud raucous laughter and Hikigaya Hachiman felt himself growing slightly annoyed at her lack of sympathy to his situation.
"…Not funny sensei."
"Actually Hikigaya it's freaking hilarious!"
She laughed at him to hide her own petty selfishness of even daring to think that this evening would become salvageable at any fixed point of time. Hiratsuka Shizuka finally came to this realisation that she was not following Hikigaya Hachiman throughout this entire evening rather it was Hikigaya Hachiman who was staying at a close proximity to her to deter these unwanted artificial developments which were a direct result of Yukinoshita Haruno meddling into affairs which did not concern her in any manner or form. Hiratsuka Shizuka wanted to laugh at herself, at her own stupidity and idiocy of looking for something which was never there, which was never meant for her, but due to her own cowardice she instead settled at making fun of poor Hikigaya Hachiman. Her voice choked but she kept on laughing and those couple of tear drops escaping her eyes were not entirely of joy but nonetheless she urged him to finish his narrative.
"And then you ran away by causing a distraction, right Hikigaya?"
"Yes sensei though it was more by creating a small misunderstanding than a clever distraction. I wanted nothing more than to leave this place as fast as possible."
Hiratsuka Shizuka lost her interest but there was one miniscule detail which failed to make sense during his whole retelling of this entire course of event. She already expected it to make no sense whatsoever but she was a sucker for punishment. Hiratsuka Shizuka had not forced her company on Hikigaya Hachiman tonight and she had never taken advantage of their scheduled tutoring session for any kind of scandalous behaviour. She wanted him to disregard her presence and forget their association in favour of one of his club mates and clearly he was provided with more than enough opportunities to do just that but he chose to pay no attention to them which begged the final question:
"Then, why didn't you ignore me Hikigaya?"
"…Because you looked like you needed help with those bags sensei."
Hikigaya Hachiman was unable to give a satisfying reply to her query but Hiratsuka Shizuka never expected him to give a straight answer which would inadvertently ruin this mystery surrounding their unexplainable feelings which remained deeply buried within them but occasionally bubbled onto the surface under certain unmanageable circumstances.
Hikigaya Hachiman finished his cup of coffee and Hiratsuka Shizuka stopped nibbling on her piece of cake. He would be taking his leave first to make a smooth getaway while carefully evading capture by either of his club mates or worse Yukinoshita Haruno. At last he made a request to his teacher before leaving.
"Sensei, if one of them happens to find you, please say you didn't see me."
"Of course Hikigaya. You don't have to worry."
Hiratsuka Shizuka agreed to lie for him despite this being an incredibly silly situation and Hikigaya Hachiman, upon getting distracted by her helpful nature momentarily forgot to weigh his own words which lead to him to blurting out an accidental phrase which she was unable to ignore.
"Thanks sensei. Love ya."
Hiratsuka Shizuka took this phrase of his as an expression of absentminded gratitude. Her cheeks felt warm, a small smile graced her lips and she momentarily lost her ability to move and form a coherent sentence. She was only able to quietly observe Hikigaya Hachiman while he paid both their bills before stealthily exiting this café after giving her a small look over his shoulders.
Hiratsuka Shizuka would think about this entire event on a later occasion but currently she wanted to splurge a little and enjoy all the commercialisation that was taking place on Christmas Eve by doing some mindless shopping.
Not your worst Christmas Shizuka, she thought consoling herself.
A/N: "Guilty Pleasure" crossed the 500 review mark! I really don't know what to say. Thank you, thank you so much you guys!
And I think it's fitting to celebrate this occasion with the 5th and final chapter of the best Shizuka x Hachiman chapters I have written so far...well, when I say final, I should point out that there are two more chapters in the collection, though they might seem kinda out of place. But if you want me to upload them, let me know in the reviews.
Now back to the "Ikebukuro" fic –
Poll#1: Which Animes Do You Want To Feature In The "Ikebukuro" fic?
Option 1: Terror in Resonance.
Option 2: Darker than Black.
Option 3: Bungou Stray Dogs.
Option 4: Steins;Gate.
Option 5: Parasyte: The Maxim.
Option 6: Anime from the Reviews.
Please pick accordingly.
And remember to mention the animes you want to feature in The "Ikebukuro" fic in the reviews.
Hope everyone enjoyed reading this chapter.
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Won't betray your dreams.