She was there again.

Rainbow lights. Fancy dresses and feathered hats. Fluttering hand fans. Hums. Warmth.

Too much warmth.

She was there again in that church, head bowed as scripture came in one ear and out the other. She was too distracted and too hot to really hear anything, though she desperately wanted to. Peace. She just wanted peace, even if for a minute.

But, of course, she was not given that.

Because to her right was a glowering face that she did not want to meet, and to her left was a brilliant being who was absolutely enthralled with the place, feet kicking out from beneath him in a rhythm and face stretched with a forever grin.

"Hinata."

"P-Please leave me alone," she whispered, wrapping her hands together and pressing her thumbs between her brows. "Please."

But the demon did not listen – no, wait. Devil. The Devil. Satan! Lucifer! Beelzebub! Whatever he wanted to be called. He was there, and he had been there, in her home, around her room, atop her bed. She had let him in – him.

Stupid, Hinata hissed to herself. You're so stupid.

Chapter 11

I Can't Believe I Fell For His Tricks

"Don't ignore me."

Common courtesy was to give someone a bit of space after a terrible event or fight had happened. Not that Sasuke knew anything about that, but still, Hinata just wanted him to leave her alone. He'd dragged her cousin out of his grave and brought him back to life, only to then kill him again right before her eyes! It wasn't that much to ask for some space and alone time, was it?

No.

If anything, she was asking too little.

Not even looking at him, Hinata leaned forward and prayed hard, with all of her soul.

"She's asking for you to leave her alone," Naruto said to the left, fingers drumming against the wood of the bench. "You're upsetting her."

That heat to her right did not move or hesitate. Not once.

"Don't do this shit," Sasuke hissed. "If you have something to say, say it directly."

Hinata only bowed her head further forward, until it was almost between her knees.

"Now she's praying that you'd learn to read the room."

"Shut up, Naruto." Sasuke moved closer. He was almost burning her, like he was touching her with his bare skin. "Hinata, despite it all, I'm no mind reader. You need to tell me –"

"I-I-Isn't it obvious?" she sobbed, then caught her breath before she made too much of a ruckus in the middle of service. "God, Sasuke, do I really have to spell out what happened yesterday to you? Why that was painful to see?" Frustrated tears bit at the corners of her eyes, and she sat up and frowned at her hands. "He's my cousin. When he died, I felt like I lost my own heart. And you – you just – killed him again!"

"You were mourning," he said. "If I brought him back, you'd stop. But you didn't."

"B-Because Neji was suddenly alive again! I was terrified!"

The row in front of them hushed them, and Hinata's cheeks turned red with shame and anger as she gave Sasuke a pointed look.

"Imagine being in my shoes," she muttered. "Someone you love has been dead for a year, and for all that time, you've been hurting and sad and missing them. And then they're suddenly alive again – and you can't understand why or how because you just don't know what is happening. How would you feel, Sasuke?"

His eyes narrowed, and he blinked. "I … don't know –"

"Because you're the Devil." Hinata wrapped her arms around herself. "You're heartless."

The heat went up a degree or twenty. She didn't have to look to know her words irked him.

"That didn't bother you before," he said.

"Before, you were just a demon. Before, you didn't kill my cousin –"

"I brought him back to life –"

"You KILLED NEJI!"

The priest's head snapped up from the pages of the bible, and Hinata stood and moved past Naruto and a few other people to leave the church. Heat followed after her, but she did not look back and kept marching down the street.

"You're right," he said from behind, "I am heartless. I don't have a soul that feels many things. Human emotions are foreign to me, and the only way I –"

"You see death every day," Hinata said, turning a sharp corner that led down a shady road. This was not the road home, but she was not going home. But, still, Sasuke followed. "I-It's normal to you. You don't feel anything when it happens – but humans – I do."

"I was trying to stop you from crying."

She stopped for a moment to turn around and show him her wet face. "Have I, Sasuke?"

He watched every sad and pained and angry tear drip from her jaw and onto the sidewalk, quiet, still. The heat cooled – or maybe it was just the wind – and Hinata quickly wiped at her face before continuing on her way. Down the block was another church, and she entered and found Naruto was already there, saving her a seat.

Only her.

Good.

But, of course, that did not stop Sasuke as he hopped on the back of the bench in front of them.

"What do you want me to do?"

Hinata looked up, fingers curling into her lap. "Leave me alone. Go away. S-Stop bothering me."

He scowled. "Other than that."

"Kill me," she sobbed, cupping her mouth. Her energy was draining. She could barely keep herself upright. Naruto's feet stop kicking, and Sasuke leaned forward, as if to catch her. "Kill me so I-I don't have to keep seeing him die every time I blink."

Sasuke stared, eyes widening.

"Go," Naruto said. "Listen to her."

No protest. No noise of annoyance. When Hinata looked up, Sasuke was gone, and she wiped more at her face as the churchgoers hummed in unison and raised their chins in praise.

…

"It wasn't just him."

In her head, she ought to be a lot more starstruck when God Himself was walking her home from church.

Somehow, things just ended up this way.

"I gave your cousin the body. I knew all of this would happen."

The scene played in her mind again. The life fleeing from his face; that cold, empty expression. He was gone and dead before she could even realize it. "Why?" she asked.

He scratched the side of his chin, heavenly face pointed to the blue sky. "Hard to explain – human language is limited when it comes to things like it." When he looked down, his smile was sheepish. God – sheepish. Maybe she was imagining things. "You call it tough love, but it's not that. It's beyond that, deeper than that, more complex than that. You do not know it or even believe it, but good will come from this."

They got to her apartment, and Hinata, exhausted, turned the key into the knob.

"It seems almost cruel," she said.

He grinned. "It probably is cruel. You can be mad and upset. I'm not saying you shouldn't. I'm not saying you should immediately forgive that bastard. The great thing about humans is that you can feel any and everything, and that makes you all the more alive."

Hinata entered her home, locking the door behind her, and remembered how cold it felt when she was alone.

…

After two days, she was getting back on track and living life how she did before Sasuke was ever a part of it.

It was hard, but she was getting used to it.

It was cold, but she didn't mind.

It was lonely, but most of her life has been.

This was just … how it had to be.

Because dating a demon – the Devil – was a stupid idea, she now knew. Her rebellious teenage years must have finally caught up on her, pulling her into trouble rather than away from it.

What was she thinking would happen, honestly?

She wanted a normal life. A home, a few pets, maybe some kids. She wanted a good job and friendly neighbors and friend catch-ups on the weekends – and she clearly couldn't have any of that with Sasuke. Clearly.

They wanted different things. They felt different things.

It wasn't meant to be.

And Hinata … was okay with that.

And … maybe if she kept telling herself that, it would one day come true.

…

She still had nightmares of Neji. Horrible nightmares. And when she snapped out of sleep, gasping, trembling, darkness was all that was there.

That night – it was still dark.

But in a different form.

Black eyes and a black cloak and black feathers.

He was back, and she was sweating and scared and still stuck in her nightmare.

"Neji," she cried. "Neji, come back."

The Lord of Hell slinked forward, like a panther, but didn't come to her side or crawl on top of her like he once did. He stayed by the foot of her bed and pulled something out – something small and glowing and flickering.

"His soul," he whispered. "You can hold him."

He dropped it in her awaiting palms, and when she pulled it to her chest, it buzzed in a warm, familiar way that made her heart roar. Hinata closed her eyes and cradled him to her heart, wanting him close – and in the darkness behind her eyelids, instead of his dying face, she saw him smiling and leaning forward and felt his warm arms around her shoulders.

Next thing she knew, sunlight was pouring into her room.

She had fallen asleep. Peacefully. The first time in days.

Neji was still in her arms, humming.

Her room was cold, but when she stood and moved past the door to get to her closet, she felt the heat slipping in from the bottom.

She found him in the kitchen, sitting on the counters, staring out the window. Neji's soul felt cool when compared to Sasuke's heat, and she wasn't even near him.

It was quiet, it was tense, it was awkward.

Of course it was.

Unsure exactly what to say, Hinata took a small step forward and, reluctantly, held Neji out to him. "Thank you," she murmured, staring at her feet.

Heat approached her, then it was gone.

Sasuke was back on the counter, as if he hadn't even moved.

"You can see him every now and then," he said.

She nodded, still not looking up. "That would be nice."

Another minute of quiet. Hinata snuck past him to start making some food to eat, and after a while, he said, "Sometimes, I wish I had one." When she glanced over, she saw his hand pressed against his chest. "A heart. Just to know what you humans feel. Not often. Just … sometimes."

Hinata turned back to her food, forcing a smile he could not see. "Emotions can be scary, sometimes. We overreact or can't control them or can't even understand them." She looked out the window, to her small porch where Naruto had once been a few days ago. "But they make us human. We need them."

There was another shift in the corner of her eye, and by instinct, Hinata looked. She always looked, and for the past few months, it had always been in Sasuke's direction. He was so strange, so different; he took up the room, no matter what size, and she could not help but stare sometimes.

Like now.

Because he looked –

"I can learn. I can't feel them, but I can learn them."

Looked … something.

Naruto was right. Human language was too limited for some things.

"Will you teach me?"

Blowing a shaky breath, Hinata turned to him completely. "Sadness," she said, "is like everything you want and love no longer matters. It feels like the entire world is ripping apart. You're numb – or you can't fully understand what you're feeling; but whatever it is, it hurts, and you'd do almost anything to make it go away." Her right hand pressed over her heart as she finally met his eye. "That day, I felt that. What you did made me feel that."

He leaned forward – an inch, maybe, but not much.

"Leave me alone."

He was listening to her.

"What else makes you feel that way?"

Hinata bit her lips together, thinking. "When no one listens to me for too long and I feel like I can't speak up for myself," she said. " When a customer at work yells at me. When I feel like I'm a failure because I did bad on a test. When someone I love dies, or leaves me, or hurts me."

"That's what I did?" His eyes were narrow and serious. "I hurt you?"

"Yes."

His mouth tilted, then turned back into a straight line. "I understand. I will not do that again."

"Everyone makes mistakes," she said. "Yours was just … a big one, and I needed time alone to think."

"I understand."

"U-Um, but even after what happened a few days ago, I-I appreciate you trying to put in the effort. It … makes me happy."

"What else makes you happy?"

This time, Hinata could not help but smile. "Many things, thankfully. Seeing people laugh and smile and have a good time makes me happy. Achieving a goal makes me happy. Hearing 'I love you' and being hugged and reminded I'm not alone … really makes me happy."

"And when you are happy," Sasuke mused, "what does it feel like?"

That hand that was still against her chest trembled with the racing beat of her heart as she soaked in his heat, his warmth, his presence. She knew she shouldn't. She really did.

But …

"Like I'm the only person in the world."

His eyes were on that trembling hand as his own went to his chest, still and beatless. He scowled, then wiped it away and kept his blank face again.

"I … understand."

And that time, she felt like he actually did.

He stood, and she stepped towards him automatically.

"Sasuke, do you –"

He turned and left down the hallway, probably to make a gateway back to Hell, and Hinata realized that was the second time she had unsuccessfully asked him to stay with her.

Chapter 11 - End