Danced
By Kokueino Matataki
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing sadly doesn't belong to me. Although my room is a shrine, and I parade around shouting its name, it still doesn't belong to me. I have a lint ball, and that's it. **Sniffle.**
Author's Note: This is so totally not my best work. I felt it, but it didn't come out right. Gomen. But if you like it...Please review!!! **Glomps Duo.**
I sit here. Feeling ever more lonely. As I stare at the blue corn moon, I can only think about those eyes. Those hard, cold, emotionless eyes.
I remember the first time I saw them, those eyes. They were as chilly as ever, but also confused. I recall saying his name under my breath, wondering what on Earth had possessed me to follow him then.
My chestnut hair is out of its traditional braid, for it symbolizes loss. Yes, I am without one, one whom is closer than the breeze blowing softly over me now. I can feel the tears prick the back of my eyes, threatening to spill forth again.
I ran after him, my hair coming loose and billowing out behind me. He was too far ahead; and with that lost, suicidal look on his face, too. He jumped. He had jumped clear off that sheer, naked cliff into the raging sea below. I think I even was tempted to go in after him, to give my live for him. Because I knew, I could not go on without telling him. Without him.
Footsteps are coming up from behind me now. Heavy footsteps. The doctor that had come and proclaimed the life that remained in his veins. Weak, sad life, but life nonetheless.
A whisper, a breath of wind, a breath of someone who wants to be free like the wind.
"He wakes."
I nod, the light flickering ever steadily in my eyes. Like the candle families of soldiers lit until their fathers, brothers, and husbands returned.
I tread to the starched room, where the small bed frame stands humbly in the corner, beneath a bright, offensive bulb. The scratched table beside it bears the w eight of IV fluids and uneaten meals. Beyond the window shines the light of many stars, making the frail figure outlined in shadows.
I gulp, sensing those eyes on me once more. The drugs make them hazy, I notice, sitting next to the boy in a plastic garden chair.
"You...You saved me. When I...I told you...That I wasn't worth it..." He rasped softly, coughing once and returning his icy gaze to mine own violet one.
"I...I couldn't let you die, man. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I had let you drown. You gotta believe that you mean more to me than a simple ally in war, Heero." I sputter, the choking tears spilling over. "How could you think that just because the war was over you had no place among us? You're just as important to me as you are them. Death isn't the solution, dude. No. It's the cowardly way out. And I know you're no coward, Heero." I managed a smile, a cheery, genuine smile.
He stares at me blankly, as if he doesn't get why I care so much.
"You think I'm more than a war child...?" Heero gasped, realization dawning on him. God, how he had changed from the stiff, perfect soldier I saw when I first met him. His mask is gone now, the drugs and the wounds probably adding to that. A broken, lonely kid. Now, a broken, lonely kid with a new hope.
"Of course! Heero, you mean more to us than anything! I totally would die if you ever pulled another stunt like that. Heero, you're my best friend. Closer than a brother to me. And I can't live without you. You belong just as much as any of us." I assure him, taking a delicate hand into my own.
"You mean that stuff you said was...Was..."
"Heero. I was drunk. I was crazy about you. I was mad at you. Gimme a break, all right?" I chide gleefully.
"Crazy about me?" He echoes.
"Hell yeah. Boy, the way you danced. The way you danced. You showed me...You showed me I wasn't the only one."
Brel has left. He sent a nurse up, who dismissed herself shortly after seeing that we were in conversation.
"I danced?" He frowned. Almost as if he doesn't remember.
"Oh, God. Heero, you've forgotten? Shit! Man, you showed those guys at the bar! And then you grabbed me. And we danced. We danced all night. And then...And then..." I blush scarlet, reminiscing. "And then you kissed me. And when I didn't kiss you back, you ranted about how you didn't deserve to live. That you were hopeless."
"That's because I was. And am. Duo, I'm so lost."
He is so different. That night was the best in my whole life.
"Heero, you danced with me. With me. And I've never felt to happy."
"Duo. As soon as I get out of this place, I'm taking you dancing. I obviously owe you. If I'm so great." Heero smiled.
I cry fresh tears.
"God, Heero."