Chica Bonita
A Fic by Mighty Pen
Disclaimer: Wrestlers own themselves. This story is completely fiction. Vince McMahon owns the WWF. He is god! Bow down to him! LOL… Characters belong to Titan Sports. I own Aunt Melinda. WOO!
Genre: Humor/Supernatural
Rating: R for language and sexual remarks
*
"I don't know, Amy, really…" Matt wrapped a hand around his neck. "We've been together for over a year now… And I feel that… Well, we don't have a spark anymore."
Amy trembled. "Not a spark? You're the one who created this spark! YOU came down to the ring and kissed ME!" Matt hung his head low.
"And I regret it."
Amy Dumas sat up in bed. "Phew," She whispered. "It was only a nightmare. Matt would never leave me. He loves me!" She giggled. Slipping out of bed, she dug her feet into flat purple slippers that hit her heels when she walked. "Da, da, da, da…" She walked into her blue and white kitchen and picked up her phone.
"555-1000," Amy sang, dialing the numbers. One ring. Two rings. Three rings. Four rings. "Hmmm…" Amy pondered. "Matt usually picks up by the third ring." An answering machine came on. "Hey peeps- this Matt Hardy, you know, the gorgeous high flyer on WWF TV. I am not home right now, so leave your name, message, number, and if you're a hot chick, you're address and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. BEEP!"
Now, any reasonable woman would see that her boyfriend was playing her. But… Not Amy. She left a sweet message. "Hi, Matt! This is Amy, your girlfriend. I wanted to say good morning, but you're not home right now. I love you. Call me back, okay? My number is 240-4420." She paused and giggled. "I think you know my number." And she hung up.
Not giving a second thought where Matt might be, she went back to her daily routine. She was going to see him later, anyway.
*
Matt moaned and rolled over to see the gorgeous blonde next to him. "Hi," She whispered. "Someone just left a message. I couldn't make out what they were saying." Matt leaned over and kissed her. He fluffed up his pillows. He got up off of his bed, nearly falling because he drank too much the night before.
Clumsily, he walked over to his answering machine and pressed "hear messages." He drummed his fingers on his nightstand and waiting for his message. "Hi, Matt! This is Amy, your girlfriend. I wanted to say good morning, but you're not home right now. I love you. Call me back, okay? My number is 240-4420. (Pause) (Giggle) I think you know my number." CLICK!
Matt gasped. "Oh, shit!" This blonde rolled over. Matt groaned when he saw that she was in her birthday suit. "Who was that?" She asked blissfully. "That was my-" Matt began.
"MATTHEW HARDY!" Amy screamed. She was in the threshold of the bedroom doorway. "Girlfriend," He finished. The blonde sat up and used pillows to cover her. "God Matt," She said. "You go out with a redhead?" Amy glared at her. "You got a problem with redheads, dumb blonde?" The blonde chuckled. "Bring it on, bitch!" Matt cringed. "Stop it, you two!"
Amy snorted. "You stupid player! I never should have trusted you! Stupid player!" She started to cry. The blonde reached under the bed and pulled out some clothes. Quickly slipping into them, she sighed. "I thought you would be better. After all, you are a Hardy." Matt turned red with embarrassment. "I am sorry, guys, I never meant to hurt you two."
"No," the blonde whined, "I thought you would have been better in bed." And with that, she walked out the door. "Amy, look, I can explain-" Amy shook her head as she buried her face into her hands. She wiped tears away, shakily. "Don't explain," She cried. "Don't ever talk to me again! It's over! Done with!" And then she walked out the door. Matt sighed. "You fucked up a good thing, Matt," He said miserably.
*
"I am real sorry, Amy," Lots of friends and enemies gave Amy her support. "I don't know what I was thinking when I kissed him," Trish said. "I would have gotten played myself. Boy, that would be embarrassing." Amy grinned. "Thanks for your support, Trish." Trish nodded. "No problem, chick."
"Matt is such a scum." That was the talk of all the divas. "Hey, I got an idea!" Jackie said suddenly. "Why don't we all go to that new club that just opened?" Nora smiled. "Sure! It sounds like a super idea! I am game. And you love to dance, Amy." Amy sniffed. "Matt and I went there Saturday." Jackie bit her lip. "Oops." Amy wasn't happy. "Maybe we can all go to that new diner?" Stephanie suggested.
"You need a date for that diner! It's a romantic one!" Amy wailed. A new set of tears flowed down her cheeks. All the fellow divas sighed. "Get a date," Joanie suggested. Amy looked at her fellow diva as if she was crazy. "Get a date? I am traumatized for life! I can't get a date." She sobbed. Joanie rolled her eyes. "Guys hold up signs that say 'marry me Lita' and you can't get a date?"
"No." Amy banged her head against the wall. "I am never going to stoop as low as to ASK a guy to take me somewhere." "Hey!" Stephanie shouted. Amy sighed. "No offense, Stephanie." Joanie tapped her foot impatiently. "Come on! I am sure Dean will go out with you." Amy raised her eyebrow. "Yeah, right, like I'd ever ask Dean." All the divas looked at her like, "what are you waiting for?" Amy bolted out of the room. "Oh, Dean!"
Amy sighed as she entered the Radicalz dressing room. "Hi Dean," Amy mumbled. Dean smiled and checked her out. "Well, well, well… Look at you." Amy glared at him. "Touch me and you die." Dean held his hands up. "All right, don't bite my head off." Amy rolled her eyes. "Whatever- let me get to the REAL point why I am here. I am going out with the divas and I need a date. Be my date, please?"
Dean chuckled. "Why aren't you going out with that… Hardy of yours?" Amy scowled. "We broke up. Please go with me, Dean?" Dean stroked his chin. "Well, as much as I'd love to, I have to accompany Perry on his date with Terri. Sorry." He walked out of the room. Amy stood there, mortified. "Even the mop lover has a social life!" She yelled. Moaning, she walked back into the locker room.
"So… Where's Dean?" Stephanie asked, zipping up her dress. Amy sighed. "He can't come. Damn it!" Stephanie grinned. "Girl- chill. I am going to get you a date." She promised. "Close your eyes," Stephanie ordered. She took Amy by the hand and led her down the hall. "Now, he is usually single, but I PROMISE you, he'll go out with you." Amy, eyes still closed, sighed. "Wonder who my match made in heaven will be…"
"No, Steph! NO FUCKING WAY!" Amy moaned when she saw Rikishi right in front of her. "Er… Solofa… Would you be willing to take Amy out tonight?" Steph said. Her teeth clenched because she was wrestling Amy, who tried to run away. Solofa turned to Amy and shrugged. "I am taking my girlfriend out to an all you can eat buffet tonight." He said, getting up. "It'll be closed tomorrow," Amy muttered. Stephanie nudged Amy's side.
"OW!" Amy whined, pushing Stephanie. Solofa sighed. "Sorry, Amy." And he waddled off. Amy looked pleadingly to Stephanie. "This is SO not going my way," Stephanie grinned. And she pulled Amy by the hand again. "Listen, there's gotta be one single guy in this federation." Stephanie paused. "I am almost sure there is." Amy sighed. "So I'll be a hermit when I grow up… No shame in that."
"Amy, shut up. I guaran-damn-tee you; I will get someone for you. Wait a minute!" Stephanie exclaimed. "Rocky!" Amy had a look of horror on her face. "He's married- and his wife is pregnant!" Amy moaned. "This sucks." Stephanie sighed. "Hmm… All right. Come with me." Amy rolled her eyes. "Edge!" Stephanie called. Amy screamed.
"Dude! What's up?" Edge asked, smiling into the King of the Ring trophy. "Adam- hi," Stephanie said sweetly. She pushed Amy behind her. "I have a favor to ask you." Edge looked up from the trophy. "Sure thing, chick. What can I do for a full on scorch cake like you?" Stephanie grinned. "I appreciate the comment, Adam, but I need for you to go out with a friend of mine." Adam grinned. "Dude, as long as it's not Billy Bitchcakes or that barfette Lita, I am cool."
"Oh, forget it," Stephanie said, already exasperated. Edge shrugged. "Whatever, babe. It's just you and me now." He spoke to the trophy. "Stephanie- look. This is so not working out for me! I need a real man, not one of these losers. I need… Matt." Amy slumped against a wall. "These guys reek. And it's not of awesomeness." Stephanie sat down beside her friend. "Matt played you. He made you a look a fool. Don't ever go back to him." Amy sighed. "Did I mention this REALLY sucks?"
Stephanie shrugged. "Sorry, chick. I am trying my best." Amy nodded. "Yeah, I am sorry. Hey- I am just going to visit my Aunt tonight anyway. Have a good time at the diner." Stephanie got up. "Amy, wait!" But it was too late. Amy already sped out of the door.
*
"Left… Right…Now where is it?" Amy stroked her chin. "Damn," She entered a brownstone building. The floor was a yellow marble with swirls of olive green and light brown. The walls were cream colored with ripples going through it. In a hollow space between the walls, a door stood. It was the main stairway. If you made a left you'd see the line of mailboxes that belonged to the people who lived there, and the elevators that were transporting people up and down.
Amy trudged over to the mailboxes. There had to be a good 120 mailboxes there, maybe more. Above the mailboxes, there was a bulletin board. It was the list of the people who lived in this building. Straining her eyes, Amy traced a finger over the list. "I hope she still lives here," Amy muttered to herself. Her finger slid down to the "3rd floor apartments." Scanning her finger slower now, she stopped on one.
3F- Roberts, Melinda
"Aunt Melinda," Amy whispered. "Success!" She sprinted to the elevators. Pressing the button, the one on the left came immediately. Ready to step in, Amy was stopped. "Oh my god! Are you Amy Dumas?" A teenage boy asked. Amy nodded. She put her foot by the electronic eye of the elevator, to stop it from closing. "Yeah," Amy said, sticking out her hand. "I am here to see my Aunt."
The teenage boy nodded, but he didn't take her hand. "Cool." And he walked away. "Bastard," Amy spat. Getting into the elevator, she pushed in the third button and waited as the slow elevator brought her to her destination. Clash and clang up three stories, when suddenly the elevator came to a halt. Realizing she was on the third floor already she got out and stood in the middle of the green and cream hallway.
"Left or right?" Amy pondered. Her heels clicking, she walked left. The first apartment was "3H." So 3F must be two doors down. Amy thought right. Stepping up to the apartment, she banged on the door. "Who is it?" A soothing yet creepy voice asked. "Aunt Melinda, it's Amy." The door swung open. "Amy! My dear, beautiful Amy! Come in, come in!" Melinda had wavy dark hair and dark eyes. She was dressed in all black and the sound of bubbles popping and swishing together filled her apartment.
"What brings you here, child?" Melinda asked, handing Amy a drink. Amy looked at it and sniffed it. It was regular iced tea. Pouring some into her mouth, she swallowed and sighed. "I need some help. I think a spell will help me." Melinda broke out into a bigger smile. "Then you have come to the right place! What kind of spell, my little diva, you?" Amy grinned a sideways grin. "A love spell."
"Love spells are complicated, Amy."
'"I know Aunt Melinda, but I really need one! Make Matt fall in love with me again."
"Matt?"
"My ex boyfriend. Make him be true, make him be loyal, and please- make me be pretty."
"Okay, dear. Sit down."
Amy sat down on the couch. Aunt Melinda left the living room and came back with a battered gray book. "Close your eyes, Amy," She ordered. Amy did as she was told. "Okay-" Melinda said. She breathed in.
"Make her the most grand
The most beautiful of this land.
Make all the guys see her.
Make her a Chica Bonita."
Amy felt a sudden warmth spread through her. '"Is that it?" She asked her Aunt. Melinda nodded and set the book down onto the couch beside Amy. "Yes, basically." Amy picked up the book and flipped through it. "What do you mean 'basically?' Melinda's face held a sly smile. "My dear- you will look pretty to everyone, but you must show self confidence. That makes the prettiest thing. Now go."
Amy hugged her Aunt and left. Running a hand through her hair, she realized that it was curly. What? Amy thought. When she entered Melinda's house it was straight as a board. Amy bit her lip and hoped there weren't any other changes to her face. Not wanting to wait for the elevator, Amy slipped down the three flights of stairs and looked furiously for a mirror when she reached the lobby.
She found one by the manager's office. Peering into it, she breathed a sigh of relief. Only her hair changed. It wasn't really curly like tangled curly- but bouncy curly. It didn't look so bad. She kind of liked it. Smiling to herself, she walked back to the main doors of the building. Leaving the building, she saw the same teenage boy she saw a half-hour ago.
"Oh my god! You're Lita!" He exclaimed. Amy raised an eyebrow. "Yeah- we just met-" The boy took her hand. "You are a goddess." He said. "Simply a goddess." Amy blushed. "Really… I am not." The boy grinned. "Yes you are. You are so beautiful." Amy shivered as he kissed her hand. The spell must have blocked everyone's memory of the old me…The boy walked back to the elevator and he took once last glance at her as he did.
Amy raised her eyebrow to no one. "Okay…" She said. She walked out of the building, the warmth still flowing through her body.
*
Amy walked down the streets of Boston. She wasn't really used to this town. Sure, she had traveled with the WWF here, and she had been here to visit her Aunt, but this place was oddly unfamiliar. She hoped to see someone from the WWF across her path. After all, the rest of the WWF were traveling, too. "Amy! Hey Amy!" Someone called. That someone sounded like… Jeff Hardy.
"Thank god! God bless Aunt Melinda." Amy said. She ran up the street. "Yo, Jeff! Wait up, son!" She called. Did I always talk like that? Amy thought. Must have. She trudged up to the young high flyer and smiled. "Hiya, big boy." She said. She backed away. What the hell is wrong with me? Jeff raised an eyebrow. "Amy, are you okay?" Amy held her head and looked up. Jeff blushed.
"Wow…" He murmured. Amy grinned at him and put her arms up over her head. She moved her lip at him and licked her lips. If you've got it, flaunt it, she thought. "Amy- is it just me… Or have you gotten prettier within two hours?" Amy turned as red as her hair- but in a good way. "My… Um… Aunt… Fixed me up. She lives on the corner." Amy pointed to the building. Jeff stroked his chin. "Cool."
Amy nodded. "So… Are you hungry?" Jeff shrugged. "I can go for a slice of pizza," He said. He turned around to the garbage can and spit his gum out. When he turned back, he screamed. Amy, not knowing what he screamed at, screamed with him. "Jeff? What is it?" Jeff groaned and turned his head from Amy.
"Your face, Amy!" Amy twisted her face up. "My face? What the hell is wrong with my- OH MY GOD!"
Amy looked into a window of a pizza store. Her face- it was horrible. Her skin had turned gray, her hair was now stringy and a matching color to her skin. Her eyes- they turned black. Her lips were a horrible purple color. "Fuck and a half," Amy cursed, covering her face. Jeff stood there, unaware of what was happening.
*
Amy ran up the block and right back into the building. She kept her head down and dodged anybody who came her way. How did this happen? Groaning, she noticed a pack of people go into the right elevator. She didn't want to be with them and she didn't have time to get the next one. Cursing some more, she ran up the familiar three flights.
When she got to 3F, she banged on the door. "Aunt Melinda! It's Amy! OPEN UP!" Melinda opened the door. Instead of gasping at her homely niece, she chuckled. "Stop laughing! This shit isn't funny!" Amy cried. Melinda led her angry relative into the house. "You learned a lesson, dear Amy." Amy groaned and banged her head against Melinda's spell book. "I learned that I am very ugly chick."
Melinda laughed softly. She took her spell book from under Amy's head and muttered a few words. Amy touched her stringy gray hair and saw that it turned back to the regular straight red flip. Her skin was now a pale white like it had been before this whole mess started. She got up reluctantly and trudged to the mirror. Her eyes were the usual color and lips were a bright crimson. Amy Dumas was back.
"You knew about this, huh, Aunt Melinda?" Amy asked, gathering up her coat. Melinda nodded. "To teach you a lesson, dear Amy. You didn't need a spell. You were a Chica Bonita all on your own."