Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns all characters from the Harry Potter books
"Ok, hello my nice fans and such. Before you continue reading, stop telling me, "Oh, this would never happen!" "Harry would never do that!" I would just like to say-"
(From upstairs)
"Where is 'e?"
"He's downstairs writing the third chapter of his-"
"Out of ze way, Pigwidgeon Chick!"
"Oh, hello, Fleur!"
"Explain!"
"Explain what?"
"Why I 'ave not been mentioned once in your story. And you 'ave even given Lock'eart a cameo and 'e's not even going out wiz you!"
"Well, I'm just giving the audience what they want, baby! No, please, come back!"
"Oh, well," said Hagrid shaking his head. "It looks as though our 'beloved' author is in more trouble. Anyhoo, onto the next chapter!"
Chapter 3: The First Lesson
Hagrid told Ron to appear at his cabin after lunch. He would receive his first figure broom riding lessons there. Figure broom riding was making an art out of riding brooms, as broom riders would gracefully fly in the sky for points. It was much like the figure skating muggles do. Ron wasn't so sure about this idea, because it was much more accepted for witches to do this than it was for wizards. He arrived at the cabin and Hagrid was standing there.
"Alright! Yeh ready fer yehr next lesson?"
"I guess."
"Alright, come in and we'll pick out a broom fer yeh."
"What will I have? A Firebolt? A Nimbus 2000?"
"Neither! An Air Brush!"
"What?"
"Yeh see, figure riders have to use different brooms. Regular ones won't shoot out colorful sparks. That's part of the beauty of figure ridin'!"
"I see."
"Let's go!"
Ron mounted his broom. He had learned to fly a broom in his first year and had much practice as a brother of the two Gryffindor Quidditch team beaters.
"Figure ridin' is not a sport of speed and beating balls. It is a sport of grace! Of beauty! Yeh hold yehr broom not like a horse, but like a woman. Gentle, but firm…"
"Uh, Hagrid?"
"Flyin' in the air is no different than making love-"
"Er, Hagrid!"
"Oh, I'm sorry! Where was I?"
"Figure riding."
"Ah, yes! Well, just take the broom fer a ride and we'll see how yeh do."
Ron shot out into the air. He felt that the broom flew well.
"Do a figure eight!" Yelled a small Hagrid on the ground.
Ron obeyed. Then he did loops in the air, and twists and dives. He felt like he was the most graceful bird in the world. Or something cheesy like that.
"I'm doing it, Hagrid! I'm figure riding!"
"Yeh're doin' great! Now, hold on, I'm going to release 'em!"
"Er, release what, Hagrid?"
All of a sudden Ron saw a flying lizard-like creature. It was a smaller-than-usual dragon, about the size of a horse. It had a red scaly coat with spikes on the back. In fact, it looked like a flying iguana, and smoke was emitting from its nostrils. Suddenly it started breathing fire at Ron.
"What the Hell? Are you crazy?"
"Just keep flyin'!"
Ron dodged the dragon as two others were coming from him at opposite directions. He flew out of the way causing them to bump heads falling to the ground.
"That's the spirit!"
The first dragon was closely following him, his head close to the end of his broom. Ron looked behind as he saw the dragon taking in a breath of air. Upon seeing this, he remembered what made his broomstick different from others.
"Good thinkin'!"
A blast of sparks shot out of the end of his broom, hitting the dragon in the eyes. The dragon flew to the ground howling in pain. The other two dragons had turned brown.
"That was excellent," said Hagrid happily. "Shot out sparks on yehr first ride."
"What exactly were the dragons there for?"
"Oh, those? South American Mood Scales. Their scales change color depending on what mood they're in. Red fer angry, green fer tranquility, blue fer sadness, purple fer mating, and brown fer lack of energy. They are an endangered species due to their disappearing habitat in the rain forest. They don't grow to big and are not too aggressive. They breath fire up to twenty feet and have sharp talon-like claws to grab their prey. 'armless creatures, really."
"So, how did you come up with this whole figure riding idea?"
Hagrid grew silent. He looked off into the distance, his eyes watery.
"I was a figure rider once."
"You were?"
"The greatest there ever was in Hogwarts."
"But, then-"
"I was expelled. My broom, snapped in two."
They stood there for a moment. Fleur walks across the hill…
…Fleur is now out of sight.
*Applause*
To be continued…
A/N: JK Rowling owns all characters except the author, and the dragons I made up. Pigwidgeon Chick sends her love.
"Ok, hello my nice fans and such. Before you continue reading, stop telling me, "Oh, this would never happen!" "Harry would never do that!" I would just like to say-"
(From upstairs)
"Where is 'e?"
"He's downstairs writing the third chapter of his-"
"Out of ze way, Pigwidgeon Chick!"
"Oh, hello, Fleur!"
"Explain!"
"Explain what?"
"Why I 'ave not been mentioned once in your story. And you 'ave even given Lock'eart a cameo and 'e's not even going out wiz you!"
"Well, I'm just giving the audience what they want, baby! No, please, come back!"
"Oh, well," said Hagrid shaking his head. "It looks as though our 'beloved' author is in more trouble. Anyhoo, onto the next chapter!"
Chapter 3: The First Lesson
Hagrid told Ron to appear at his cabin after lunch. He would receive his first figure broom riding lessons there. Figure broom riding was making an art out of riding brooms, as broom riders would gracefully fly in the sky for points. It was much like the figure skating muggles do. Ron wasn't so sure about this idea, because it was much more accepted for witches to do this than it was for wizards. He arrived at the cabin and Hagrid was standing there.
"Alright! Yeh ready fer yehr next lesson?"
"I guess."
"Alright, come in and we'll pick out a broom fer yeh."
"What will I have? A Firebolt? A Nimbus 2000?"
"Neither! An Air Brush!"
"What?"
"Yeh see, figure riders have to use different brooms. Regular ones won't shoot out colorful sparks. That's part of the beauty of figure ridin'!"
"I see."
"Let's go!"
Ron mounted his broom. He had learned to fly a broom in his first year and had much practice as a brother of the two Gryffindor Quidditch team beaters.
"Figure ridin' is not a sport of speed and beating balls. It is a sport of grace! Of beauty! Yeh hold yehr broom not like a horse, but like a woman. Gentle, but firm…"
"Uh, Hagrid?"
"Flyin' in the air is no different than making love-"
"Er, Hagrid!"
"Oh, I'm sorry! Where was I?"
"Figure riding."
"Ah, yes! Well, just take the broom fer a ride and we'll see how yeh do."
Ron shot out into the air. He felt that the broom flew well.
"Do a figure eight!" Yelled a small Hagrid on the ground.
Ron obeyed. Then he did loops in the air, and twists and dives. He felt like he was the most graceful bird in the world. Or something cheesy like that.
"I'm doing it, Hagrid! I'm figure riding!"
"Yeh're doin' great! Now, hold on, I'm going to release 'em!"
"Er, release what, Hagrid?"
All of a sudden Ron saw a flying lizard-like creature. It was a smaller-than-usual dragon, about the size of a horse. It had a red scaly coat with spikes on the back. In fact, it looked like a flying iguana, and smoke was emitting from its nostrils. Suddenly it started breathing fire at Ron.
"What the Hell? Are you crazy?"
"Just keep flyin'!"
Ron dodged the dragon as two others were coming from him at opposite directions. He flew out of the way causing them to bump heads falling to the ground.
"That's the spirit!"
The first dragon was closely following him, his head close to the end of his broom. Ron looked behind as he saw the dragon taking in a breath of air. Upon seeing this, he remembered what made his broomstick different from others.
"Good thinkin'!"
A blast of sparks shot out of the end of his broom, hitting the dragon in the eyes. The dragon flew to the ground howling in pain. The other two dragons had turned brown.
"That was excellent," said Hagrid happily. "Shot out sparks on yehr first ride."
"What exactly were the dragons there for?"
"Oh, those? South American Mood Scales. Their scales change color depending on what mood they're in. Red fer angry, green fer tranquility, blue fer sadness, purple fer mating, and brown fer lack of energy. They are an endangered species due to their disappearing habitat in the rain forest. They don't grow to big and are not too aggressive. They breath fire up to twenty feet and have sharp talon-like claws to grab their prey. 'armless creatures, really."
"So, how did you come up with this whole figure riding idea?"
Hagrid grew silent. He looked off into the distance, his eyes watery.
"I was a figure rider once."
"You were?"
"The greatest there ever was in Hogwarts."
"But, then-"
"I was expelled. My broom, snapped in two."
They stood there for a moment. Fleur walks across the hill…
…Fleur is now out of sight.
*Applause*
To be continued…
A/N: JK Rowling owns all characters except the author, and the dragons I made up. Pigwidgeon Chick sends her love.