TITLE: Man Overboard (1/1)
AUTHOR: Anne Hedonia
RATING: PG
CATEGORY: SA, DSR
KEYWORDS: Doggett/Scully, Doggett POV
ARCHIVE: I'll send to Gossamer. Anywhere else, sure!
Please lemme know!
SPOILERS: Generally up through Season 8, and it won't
make a lot of sense if you haven't seen "Alone".
SUMMARY/AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a very quickly-
conceived-and-written, un-betaed sequel to my fic,
"Man Alive". It's my preferred 'Dipper ending for the
first scene in "Alone". Or to be more specific,
instead of having Agent Harrison walk in after Scully
left, I would have rather this happened. Much rather.
The occurrences in this fic pretty much wouldn't
happen without the occurrences in "Man Alive". Prolly
oughta read it first.
'Dippers: This is for you. Very very for you.
'Shippers and Mulderites: Dear GOD, for the love of
all that's holy, DON'T GO IN HERE!!
Feed me, feed me! And do it at ahedonia@yahoo.com.
---------------------
I can still see her sad blue eyes gazing at me, above
her faint smile.
I hear my question of a moment ago, repeating in my
head: "This is just a leave, isn't it? I mean, you
are coming back?"
They say silence is golden, but her silence at that
moment felt pretty much like lead to me. Or maybe that
was just the feel of my heart hitting the floor, after
her kind words and her embrace sent it on a dizzy
flight barely a few moments earlier.
I drift around the office, feeling her sudden absence
keenly as my heart pounds, and try to find a bright
side to hang onto. Okay, she's making no promises
about what will happen after her baby's born. That
makes sense. Things change, especially because of
babies, I understand that. But there's no reason to
assume she won't be in touch, that she'll be gone from
my life just because she doesn't come into the same
office every morning. I know we haven't talked
about...well, *us*, any further since that
conversation in the parking lot, but that's not to say
it didn't matter. I've felt it hanging there
between us ever since, lurking in her smiles and in
her shy, polite manner around me. If she'd changed her
mind, found her feelings weren't the same,
she'd...she'd tell me...wouldn't she?
It occurs to me in a flash that she might very well
not. She's an escape artist, big time. I wince as the
idea sucker-punches me. A cop's instinct for
human nature is not always a blessing.
I hear footsteps. Made by a woman's shoes. Clicking
down the hall, this way.
My heart leaps into my throat again, in a somewhat
pathetic reaction: more time with her. My brain says
that I have no guarantee her return will be
beneficial to me, or even pleasant, but my emotions
don't care. All that matters is that our estrangement
is put off, however briefly. I move toward the door, a
much bigger grin on my face than is seemly.
"You're not gone five minutes, Agent Scully, and
already I feel like a stranger in my own off-"
I see her, and her demeanor surprises me into silence.
She's walking with her head slightly down, and utterly
focused, single-minded. Scully moves through the
doorway with a determination that makes Sherman's run
through Atlanta look like a sightseeing tour. She
turns and closes the door pointedly.
I have no idea what's going on. Like that's news.
"Agent Scu-" I begin.
I never finish.
When she turns from the door, her eyes lock onto mine
with all the worry and fear I've ever seen, as though
she's a drowning woman and I hold the only life
preserver in existence. She grabs my face in both her
soft little hands and pulls it down to hers, her lips
landing solidly on mine.
Oh, Jesus God.
The softness, the astonishing softness of her perfect
mouth is my only focal point as my whole world spins.
My hands reach into her hair before I can stop them,
but she doesn't object. A moment ago I was losing her.
Then she came back, and I braced myself for everything
I could think of but this. Strange how when you try to
anticipate what a person might do, enacting one of
your sweetest fantasies doesn't often make your list
of possibilities.
She pulls away before I am ready, but that's not a
surprise - I'm not sure if there is an end to how long
I want to kiss her. She rests her forehead against
mine, gasping softly.
"You. Be. Careful. Do you hear me?" she whispers,
fighting to keep tears out of her voice. "You lean on
Skinner all you need to, and don't you dare take any
chances you don't absolutely have to take."
I have no words for her, no response. I'm just in awe
at what she's giving me.
She looks up into my face, and I can see a struggle
there of epic proportions. She looks away and presses
her lips together. "I don't know if I can do this,"
she says finally.
I remember I can talk. "Do what?"
"Leave," she says in anguish. "I mean, never *mind*
that I don't know how to *not* work. In the last seven
years, I've completely forgotten how to have a
life..." she smiles ruefully at herself. "But now I'm
stranding you all by yourself on this, with only six
months actual experience. How can I do that to
*anyone*, much less..." Her eyes roam my face with an
affection that makes me ache. "...you."
I'm overwhelmed. Adrenaline runs through me like I'm
about to give a speech in my underwear. I want very
much to kiss her again. I don't. I let her be in
charge.
"Dana." I can hardly believe I'm about to urge her to
go. "You can't keep workin' with your due date so
near. It's not an option. Even if your doctor
*would* let you, I can think of three computer geeks
and one assistant director who'd tan your hide for
even considerin' it." I brush her cheek with
my fingers, and watch her relax. My whole body
tingles. "And don't even get me started about how I'd
feel about it."
She looks at me, eyebrow arched. "*Not* that I
wouldn't love your company," I grin. But that's not
her problem. She runs her palms down my lapels. I
shiver quietly.
"I just couldn't stand it if anything happened to you
because I left you alone." Her eyes are filling up. I
make it my late New Year's Resolution to cause fewer
tears in her life, from now on. "I've been in your
position. I've been *you*. I don't know how I would
have coped back then without..." She doesn't say his
name. She finishes creatively. "...without all the
guidance I had. How on Earth can we all expect you to
deal with this without the help of someone who's been
there?"
We're silent for a moment, till I know what to say.
"Tell you what," I offer. "We'll just consider me your
eyes and ears, like back in Boston. The *second* I
find myself in over my head - heck, even up to my
lower lip - my job is to call you and get my marching
orders. Whatever you say, goes."
She's smiling faintly. I challenge myself to raise
that smile to a full-fledged beam. "You'll still have
my back," I promise. "And believe me, whatever you
need, I'll have yours. Heartburn medicine, foot rubs,
midnight runs for sardines and ice cream..."
There it is. Her face breaks out into a grin that
melts me. She looks up, chuckling wryly. "You watch
too much 'I Love Lucy'..."
My own smile takes up half my face. "Nick at Night
helps me sleep."
She sighs. I can tell she's getting ready to go. I
can't help wishing that she wasn't. I push it to the
back of my mind. "You go worry about yourself for a
change," I say.
She nods obediently. Then she lingers just a moment
more. Before I have time to second guess myself, I
take the opportunity I'm given. I lean and kiss her
again, softly. I pull away reluctantly and our faces
linger close together, eyes half-closed.
She inhales deeply, as if gathering courage. "If I
catch you doing anything stupid, I'll kick your ass."
My heart grows three sizes in my chest. I adore this
woman. "Yes, ma'am."
She collects herself, then turns and walks out the
door. I watch her stride down the hall. She turns back
once to look at me. I try and reassure her with
my eyes. She warns me with hers. A few steps later she
disappears around the corner.
I look around me, feeling my feet more firmly on the
ground. The office is still too big without her, but I
can feel her presence more strongly now. She left it
here with me. To guard me. I grin. To potentially kick
my ass.
I feel invincible.
It's all I need.
-----------------------
AUTHOR: Anne Hedonia
RATING: PG
CATEGORY: SA, DSR
KEYWORDS: Doggett/Scully, Doggett POV
ARCHIVE: I'll send to Gossamer. Anywhere else, sure!
Please lemme know!
SPOILERS: Generally up through Season 8, and it won't
make a lot of sense if you haven't seen "Alone".
SUMMARY/AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a very quickly-
conceived-and-written, un-betaed sequel to my fic,
"Man Alive". It's my preferred 'Dipper ending for the
first scene in "Alone". Or to be more specific,
instead of having Agent Harrison walk in after Scully
left, I would have rather this happened. Much rather.
The occurrences in this fic pretty much wouldn't
happen without the occurrences in "Man Alive". Prolly
oughta read it first.
'Dippers: This is for you. Very very for you.
'Shippers and Mulderites: Dear GOD, for the love of
all that's holy, DON'T GO IN HERE!!
Feed me, feed me! And do it at ahedonia@yahoo.com.
---------------------
I can still see her sad blue eyes gazing at me, above
her faint smile.
I hear my question of a moment ago, repeating in my
head: "This is just a leave, isn't it? I mean, you
are coming back?"
They say silence is golden, but her silence at that
moment felt pretty much like lead to me. Or maybe that
was just the feel of my heart hitting the floor, after
her kind words and her embrace sent it on a dizzy
flight barely a few moments earlier.
I drift around the office, feeling her sudden absence
keenly as my heart pounds, and try to find a bright
side to hang onto. Okay, she's making no promises
about what will happen after her baby's born. That
makes sense. Things change, especially because of
babies, I understand that. But there's no reason to
assume she won't be in touch, that she'll be gone from
my life just because she doesn't come into the same
office every morning. I know we haven't talked
about...well, *us*, any further since that
conversation in the parking lot, but that's not to say
it didn't matter. I've felt it hanging there
between us ever since, lurking in her smiles and in
her shy, polite manner around me. If she'd changed her
mind, found her feelings weren't the same,
she'd...she'd tell me...wouldn't she?
It occurs to me in a flash that she might very well
not. She's an escape artist, big time. I wince as the
idea sucker-punches me. A cop's instinct for
human nature is not always a blessing.
I hear footsteps. Made by a woman's shoes. Clicking
down the hall, this way.
My heart leaps into my throat again, in a somewhat
pathetic reaction: more time with her. My brain says
that I have no guarantee her return will be
beneficial to me, or even pleasant, but my emotions
don't care. All that matters is that our estrangement
is put off, however briefly. I move toward the door, a
much bigger grin on my face than is seemly.
"You're not gone five minutes, Agent Scully, and
already I feel like a stranger in my own off-"
I see her, and her demeanor surprises me into silence.
She's walking with her head slightly down, and utterly
focused, single-minded. Scully moves through the
doorway with a determination that makes Sherman's run
through Atlanta look like a sightseeing tour. She
turns and closes the door pointedly.
I have no idea what's going on. Like that's news.
"Agent Scu-" I begin.
I never finish.
When she turns from the door, her eyes lock onto mine
with all the worry and fear I've ever seen, as though
she's a drowning woman and I hold the only life
preserver in existence. She grabs my face in both her
soft little hands and pulls it down to hers, her lips
landing solidly on mine.
Oh, Jesus God.
The softness, the astonishing softness of her perfect
mouth is my only focal point as my whole world spins.
My hands reach into her hair before I can stop them,
but she doesn't object. A moment ago I was losing her.
Then she came back, and I braced myself for everything
I could think of but this. Strange how when you try to
anticipate what a person might do, enacting one of
your sweetest fantasies doesn't often make your list
of possibilities.
She pulls away before I am ready, but that's not a
surprise - I'm not sure if there is an end to how long
I want to kiss her. She rests her forehead against
mine, gasping softly.
"You. Be. Careful. Do you hear me?" she whispers,
fighting to keep tears out of her voice. "You lean on
Skinner all you need to, and don't you dare take any
chances you don't absolutely have to take."
I have no words for her, no response. I'm just in awe
at what she's giving me.
She looks up into my face, and I can see a struggle
there of epic proportions. She looks away and presses
her lips together. "I don't know if I can do this,"
she says finally.
I remember I can talk. "Do what?"
"Leave," she says in anguish. "I mean, never *mind*
that I don't know how to *not* work. In the last seven
years, I've completely forgotten how to have a
life..." she smiles ruefully at herself. "But now I'm
stranding you all by yourself on this, with only six
months actual experience. How can I do that to
*anyone*, much less..." Her eyes roam my face with an
affection that makes me ache. "...you."
I'm overwhelmed. Adrenaline runs through me like I'm
about to give a speech in my underwear. I want very
much to kiss her again. I don't. I let her be in
charge.
"Dana." I can hardly believe I'm about to urge her to
go. "You can't keep workin' with your due date so
near. It's not an option. Even if your doctor
*would* let you, I can think of three computer geeks
and one assistant director who'd tan your hide for
even considerin' it." I brush her cheek with
my fingers, and watch her relax. My whole body
tingles. "And don't even get me started about how I'd
feel about it."
She looks at me, eyebrow arched. "*Not* that I
wouldn't love your company," I grin. But that's not
her problem. She runs her palms down my lapels. I
shiver quietly.
"I just couldn't stand it if anything happened to you
because I left you alone." Her eyes are filling up. I
make it my late New Year's Resolution to cause fewer
tears in her life, from now on. "I've been in your
position. I've been *you*. I don't know how I would
have coped back then without..." She doesn't say his
name. She finishes creatively. "...without all the
guidance I had. How on Earth can we all expect you to
deal with this without the help of someone who's been
there?"
We're silent for a moment, till I know what to say.
"Tell you what," I offer. "We'll just consider me your
eyes and ears, like back in Boston. The *second* I
find myself in over my head - heck, even up to my
lower lip - my job is to call you and get my marching
orders. Whatever you say, goes."
She's smiling faintly. I challenge myself to raise
that smile to a full-fledged beam. "You'll still have
my back," I promise. "And believe me, whatever you
need, I'll have yours. Heartburn medicine, foot rubs,
midnight runs for sardines and ice cream..."
There it is. Her face breaks out into a grin that
melts me. She looks up, chuckling wryly. "You watch
too much 'I Love Lucy'..."
My own smile takes up half my face. "Nick at Night
helps me sleep."
She sighs. I can tell she's getting ready to go. I
can't help wishing that she wasn't. I push it to the
back of my mind. "You go worry about yourself for a
change," I say.
She nods obediently. Then she lingers just a moment
more. Before I have time to second guess myself, I
take the opportunity I'm given. I lean and kiss her
again, softly. I pull away reluctantly and our faces
linger close together, eyes half-closed.
She inhales deeply, as if gathering courage. "If I
catch you doing anything stupid, I'll kick your ass."
My heart grows three sizes in my chest. I adore this
woman. "Yes, ma'am."
She collects herself, then turns and walks out the
door. I watch her stride down the hall. She turns back
once to look at me. I try and reassure her with
my eyes. She warns me with hers. A few steps later she
disappears around the corner.
I look around me, feeling my feet more firmly on the
ground. The office is still too big without her, but I
can feel her presence more strongly now. She left it
here with me. To guard me. I grin. To potentially kick
my ass.
I feel invincible.
It's all I need.
-----------------------