A Different Reality Part 4
by Cybra
A/N: Woohoo! Part 4! Yippee! :::begins running from men in white coats::: You'll never catch me!!! :::runs back::: If this POV seems dark to you and a little out of character, there's a good reason for it. It's called an "Alternate Universe". Things and people are bound to be different. Like Kari's POV had been a little different than you would've normally thought.
Disclaimer: I intend to take over the world by…oh. Sorry. Ahem, I don't own Digimon. That's all you need to know. Now, my plan to take over the world, you do not need to know.
I hate my life. I really do.
For the past 16 digi-years, I thought that I'd never have to see another human being again.
Except for the one in my reflection, that is.
However, even Tentomon has been thinking of me as a Digimon over these long years…Even though I have none of the attributes that Digimon have.
That's when I received news that left me feeling empty and alone all over again:
There were more humans in the Digiworld.
I had hoped I'd escaped them. I thought I'd finally be left alone, left in peace…
Left to forget.
Remembering my old life is too painful. I can't stand it.
Therefore, I sidestep all questions about my past, no matter who puts them forward to me.
I've never really felt alone in the Digiworld. I've always had Tentomon beside me. Together we fight evil Digimon while I discover more and more about this fascinating place.
Now, it looks like my peace of mind is about to be shattered again.
I suppose I should introduce myself.
I'm Koushiro Izumi. Digidestined, keeper of the Crest of Knowledge…and Fate's toy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
I hate my life.
"Koushiro?" Tentomon asked, breaking me away from my thoughts. His large green eyes show off his worry for me.
I give him a smile. It's not done with my lips actually, but with my eyes.
Nobody's seen me smile with my lips for over three Earth-years.
No. Don't think of Earth. Earth was pain.
Yet…I fight to save it.
The Digiworld and Earth are connected. If something happens to one world, the other world suffers. So when I fight to save the Digiworld, I'm fighting for Earth as well.
I briefly wondered if anybody had noticed I'd disappeared off my home world. Most likely not. Nobody there had cared if I had lived or died.
Tentomon began waving for my full attention. I'd let my mind wander again.
"Sorry, Tento. You were saying something?" I asked.
I call Tentomon "Tento" sometimes since it's faster. While he has a nickname, I don't. I really don't care either.
"The group will be moving into this area soon. What do you suggest we do?"
I gave the answer immediately.
"Hang back in the shadows. Maybe try to stay ahead of them."
Tentomon sighed and gave me a look. "Koushiro, why don't we join up with them? They're on our side."
I shake my head. "No, Tentomon. At least, not yet."
"All right…"
I knew that Tentomon knew something had happened to me back before I came to the Digiworld, but I would never discuss it with him. It was too private and too painful.
I didn't want to burden him with my pain.
~~~~~
The group had decided to stop and rest nearby a lake in the forest. Piximon was buzzing around and grilling all the Digimon on how to attack an enemy and defend themselves and their partners from an enemy. I rolled my eyes. They'd be gone in a few minutes.
I turned my attention to each of the Digidestined children below me as I crouched in a tree above. I knew which Digidestined had which Digimon for a partner. I saw Taichi Kamiya, the leader, standing off to the side with Yamato Ishida. Agumon and Gabumon were standing next to their respective partners. Takeru Takaishi, Yamato's little brother, was chasing Patamon. Mimi Tachikawa was talking with Palmon, Sora Takenouchi, and Biyomon. Jyou Kiddo was walking up to Taichi and Yamato with Gomamon. They were probably going to discuss how to attack Puppetmon.
How did I know their names? Easy. I had learned them from Hikari Kamiya, Taichi's little sister. I had saved her and her partner Gatomon from Skullgreymon. She was the only one who had seen me up close.
I still wonder if I should've done that.
Maybe I would've been better off if I hadn't shown her what I looked like.
Then again, maybe it wouldn't have been.
I could've just left her for Skullgreymon.
Nah. Better to have let her see me than to let her die.
Wasted lives lead to the downfall of either side in a war.
This whole situation was exactly that:
A war.
I snapped myself out of my thoughts when Tentomon poked me. I watched the Digidestined as they talked, played, and just sat around. That's when I realized something.
Hikari was looking at me.
Not in my direction.
She was looking right at me.
I moved backwards, further into the shadows. I wanted to get away from her knowing gaze. It scared me. She scared me.
Heck. I scare me.
I shook my head slightly to clear it. Tentomon landed silently beside me. Stealth had become something we were both good at. I was tempted to open up my laptop and work to pass the time, but didn't dare. Someone might see the glow of the laptop screen.
Hikari walked over to her older brother. She waited patiently for Taichi, Jyou, and Yamato to stop talking before she spoke.
"Tai, I'm going to use the girls' bush," she stated.
"Okay, but don't take too long."
Hikari nodded and began walking my way. I slowly moved backwards to keep her in front of me. She kept walking until she finally stopped. I froze, not even breathing. I didn't want to give away my position.
"I know you're here, Light Child."
Mentally, I cursed myself for the 5th time for writing that stupid note. I'd given away the translation of my name in order to confuse them, but apparently had intrigued Hikari.
'Please don't look my way…' I pleaded in my mind.
"Why don't you come out? I'm not going to hurt you. You know that."
I touched the bandage that she'd put on my arm. She had wrapped my wound even though I had protested against it. A stubborn little girl, that one is.
Hikari sat down on a log, waiting patiently for my answer. Tentomon nudged me.
"Go down there…" he hissed into my ear.
Sighing, I jumped down out of the tree. Hikari looked only slightly surprised at my sudden appearance, but forced herself to look calm again. She smiled.
"Hi!" she cheerfully greeted me.
My face remained impassive as I nodded to her. "Hello, Hikari."
I know my voice sounds cold all of the time, but I really can't help it. It's a defense that I picked up on Earth. If you acted cold to other people, they left you alone. But for some odd reason, Hikari didn't seem at all fazed by my cold tone of voice. She merely smiled even more and touched the spot beside her, urging me to sit next to her.
As if I was watching from a distance, I walked over and sat down next to her.
Half of my mind screamed at me, 'What do you think you're doing?! Hikari is a human!'
'So am I,' the other half retorted.
'You can't trust them. You can't trust her.'
'Why not?'
'She's one of them. She's got the life that you always wanted to have.'
'True…but maybe she's not like everyone else.'
'Stop fooling yourself! Don't you remember what happened on Earth?!'
I forced down a shudder as memories of my life on Earth waterlogged my thoughts. I was frustrated with myself for thinking that I could possibly have found someone other than Tentomon that I could actually trust. I also realized that I had been carrying on a conversation with Hikari while I'd been thinking.
"So, you think that Digiworld is inside some sort of computer?" my unexpected companion asked me.
I nodded. "Yes. There is enough evidence all around this world that supports this statement. The mysterious writing is actually computer code."
Hikari nodded. It was obvious that she didn't get all the computer terms, but her eyes showed me that she got the main idea of my theory. I vaguely noted that it was a lot like talking to Tentomon. Fascinating…
I vaguely remembered how we'd gotten onto that subject. She'd asked me about my health and I'd done the same to be polite. Then, she'd asked me if I'd learned anything about the Digiworld while I was here. That's when I'd told her about my theory that the Digiworld was actually made from data.
Was she baiting a trap? I didn't know. However, Tentomon would always signal me if something went wrong. I sat and listened to her as she talked about her Digimon friend Gatomon. For some odd reason, that compelled me to pull out my laptop.
"What're you doing?" Hikari asked, genuinely interested.
"I'm calling up my Digimon Analyzer program."
"What's that?"
'She actually wants to know about something I've done?' I wondered in shock, but I didn't say it out loud.
What I said was, "It's a program for identifying different Digimon. I have well over 100 different species of Digimon recorded."
"Any of ours in there?"
I nodded. I called up a screen with a picture of Gatomon. Digital cameras are wonderful things. Gatomon's statistics popped up as well. Hikari smiled, recognizing the feline Digimon instantly.
"That's a really good picture of her! Did you take it?"
I nodded again, this time a little wary. Was I showing her too much? Telling too much about myself? I had only told her about my theory and my program, but nothing personal about me. However, I could tell that Hikari was intelligent. She'd most likely figured out that I liked working with computers and loved to discover things. Curiosity was one of the emotions I could never get rid of.
No matter how hard I tried.
I turned my attention to the screen as she pointed at something.
"I thought that Gatomon was a Vaccine type."
My eyes grew slightly wide as I realized my mistake. That and she was actually reading over my data. I'd accidentally typed in "Virus" instead of "Vaccine". The reason was that I had been working late that night. However, this was still no excuse.
A few quick keystrokes and the problem was fixed. I gave her a slight smile with my eyes…despite the fact that I didn't want to smile at all.
"Thank you."
She smiled brilliantly. "You're welcome!"
"Kari!" Taichi yelled to his sister.
Tentomon began beating his wing against a bunch of leaves. The sound is really quite irritating…which made it a good sound to have when people approach. I shut down my computer, put it in my backpack, and tensed up, ready to bolt out of sight. A hand gripped onto my wrist.
"No! Don't go yet! Come with us!" she pleaded.
I tugged at her hand, trying to get her to let go.
"At least tell me your name!"
"Maybe some other time," I answered coldly.
At the same time, I heard the noise Tentomon was making getting louder. The group was getting closer.
"Please…?" Hikari pleaded.
"Hikari, let go," I ordered sternly. I didn't have time for this!
Much to my surprise…she let go! I raced out of sight as I saw Taichi's shape begin to come out of the bushes. I barely made it to safety before he ran up to his sister.
"Where were you? I was getting worried!" he asked.
"I was fine, Tai. I was talking to a friend."
Gatomon's ears pricked up. She must've heard me breathing, but didn't say anything. I willed my breathing quieter, slowing down my intake of oxygen. I froze, not making a sound.
If Gatomon still heard me, she made no reaction.
However, I think she still heard me.
I left them as the group began to walk away, positive that the sounds of their talking and footsteps would cover up any misstep I could make.
~~~~~
Tentomon stared at me over the fire between us. I stared right back. He never had to say "You need to be with them" and I never had to say "No, I don't", but it was like we had. The two of us were arguing without speaking a word. Both our wills were doing the arguing for us.
Finally, Tentomon began to speak his argument aloud, "Koushiro, I respect you and I'd do anything for you. Right off, I'd like to say that."
After swallowing the bite of the chili mixture I'd cooked up, I answered, "Thank you, Tentomon. I respect you as well. You're the best friend anyone could have. I definitely don't deserve you."
I could tell he was blushing. I'd hoped that would do the trick…especially since it was true. Still, he quickly recovered.
"And I'd like to point out that you're a human. You need to be with other humans. I'm so used to thinking of you as a Digimon that I kept seeing the differences between you and those other humans when there shouldn't be any!"
I set down my make-shift bowl as Tentomon took a bite out of his dinner. "Tento, humans are diverse in many different ways. This is totally natural."
"Not in the way you hide from them. You actually run whenever one of them gets too close…except for Kari, of course."
While I call her "Hikari", Tentomon had picked up on calling her by her nickname. He did the same with the others if they had nicknames. I sighed.
'Here we go again…'
He leaned closer to me, staying just out of the fire. "Koushiro…I'm starting to think that you're attracted to her."
I blew a bit of fiery red hair out of my face. "Attracted to that girl? Me? I think you're having a short-circuit, Tentomon."
"Then explain to me why you only let her meet you in person."
Touché. And other French words to that effect. However, Tentomon would have to be ready for my response.
"Tentomon, you and I swooped in and saved her life. It seems logical that she would've seen me. There was no way that you could've grabbed her and Gatomon from Skullgreymon on your own. You needed an extra set of hands. Besides, Gatomon had been hurt. There was no way that you could've fought Skullgreymon and taken care of Gatomon at the same time."
My cold logic won out. Tentomon merely grumbled before he continued eating.
We'd had this conversation many times before, but Hikari hadn't been a factor before. If I was correct, he'd bring up the subject of us joining the group of humans and Digimon again right about…
Now.
"Still…I think we should join them," Tentomon informed me, pausing to swallow in the middle of his sentence. "There's safety in numbers, Koushiro, and don't give me that lecture about us being able to take care of ourselves. I seem to remember a pair of Monochromon last week that would've been delighted to rip your head off; not to mention mine. We've been lucky so far, but now that there are others, we can increase our chances of survival." His green eyes, once hard, softened. "Koushiro…I don't want you dead."
'If I'd stayed on Earth, nobody would've given a second thought about whether I was living or dead,' I thought, admiring my best friend's loyalty.
I'm still getting used to the idea of someone being loyal to me. Not visa versa…when I was always being used as a doormat. Yeah, I'm pretty loyal…but only to those I trust. I'd been stepped on and used so many times from being loyal over the past 3 Earth-years.
No! I won't think about Earth! Not again!
"I won't die, Tento. Not yet anyway. I don't want you to die either. Still, I don't think we should join up with them." I smiled…with my eyes, naturally. "Besides, I'm not dying."
Tentomon's eyes turned sad. "That's where you're wrong, Koushiro. You may not be physically dying, but you're dying in a whole different way."
I swallowed. Hard. He'd seen pain that I'd been so sure was hidden.
"That's another reason why I want to have us join up with the group," he insisted. "I don't like to see you like this. They might be able to help with whatever it is that's bothering you."
My smile left my eyes. Carefully keeping my face expressionless, I stated, "Nothing is bothering me, Tentomon. Now, I think we should get some sleep."
I quickly polished off my chili as Tentomon curled up. I slept close to the campfire, slightly shivering. It wasn't the cold, I was used to that. It was something else…
I checked to see if Tentomon was asleep before I pulled it out. A beautiful gold necklace. It reminded me of the one thing in my life that hadn't been painful:
My parents.
The necklace was actually a locket. The heart charm held a picture of me from 4 Earth-years ago…much to my total distaste. I'd always wished that Mom had kept a picture of her and Dad in there. Especially whenever I saw the look on my 6 year-old face.
The picture, a younger version of me, was smiling.
The smile practically split my former self's face in half. It also seemed to say "I know more than you think I do". That picture had been taken a year before the smile left my face.
I closed up the heart locket and put it back inside my shirt. As I fell asleep, tears streamed from my eyes.
There are times when I can't stop thinking of Earth…
And those are the times I can hardly keep myself crying in front of Tentomon…but I can't stop when I'm alone…
TO BE CONTINUED…
A/N: A little longer than my usual parts and there wasn't any sort of attack. I thought I'd tease you with a look from Koushiro's POV. J Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Gratitude goes too…
Her Royal Weirdness: Who encouraged me to write this…and introduced me to Hishiro and Taishiro. Not to mention a little Yamashiro.
Kyra: Who did the same…except for the different couples. BTW, Kyra, you'll never get ahead of me!!! My parts may be short, but I work my hardest to make them sound good!!! Not that you don't…
My muse, Izzy: I'd be completely and utterly lost without you.
Shameless promos…
"Kyra's Fanfic Archive": A truly fabulous site for fanfic writers! :::turns to Kyra::: Where's my twenty? J
"World Under Ours": Ah! The joys of posting webpages, eh, HRW? :P Excellent site with a few couple shrines.
"All That is Ishida": For posting several of my stories there! Big fanfic archive. As in huge.