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Notes: This is a very angst-filled chapter. Well, at least at the end it is. It's also a very eventful one. No abuse though. In fact, Yama's dad isn't even in this part. Anyway…before you even read it, I'm just going to tell you that I am very well aware that I'm evil –grins stupidly for a minute-. Enjoy!

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"Sounds like a panic attack to me."

"A panic attack? That's all it was? And I was worried about my mental health for nothing."

Jyou glances at me from over the top of his glasses. "On the contrary, Yamato, a panic attack can be very serious. You could have a panic disorder."

I let out a snort. "God, I'm just fucked either way aren't I?" I cringe at the hurt look on his face. "I'm sorry. It's been a very bad week for me."

"That's all right. I understand. So when did this happen again?"

Did I not just finish telling him the story? Was he even listening the first time? "I was in the hallway after bio and everything suddenly started to spin, so I went to the bathroom where I proceeded to have the breakdown that I described two seconds ago."

"Hmm," he mumbles, continuing to finger through one of his books. "Did anything happen in biology that might have provoked this?"

You mean besides Koushiro sticking his nose where it doesn't belong? "No, not that I can think of. It was just a normal day." A little white lie never hurt anyone.

"Hmm," he repeats. Well he certainly acts like a doctor, doesn't he? "I'm not really sure what…" More pages of the book flip and he peers closer at them.

"So what should I do?"

"Well, I think you should relax for a few days. Try to avoid situations that might upset you in any way. You might also want to cut back on the caffeine. If you have another attack, then let me know about it. We might have to get you in to see an actual doctor."

Oh yeah…drug city, here I come. "All right. Well I've got practice now, so I'll see you later. Thanks, Jyou."

"Take care, Yamato."

You're lying again, I think as I walk out the door. You don't have practice. So I'm turning into a compulsive liar. So what? And you're a schizophrenic too. You're conversing with yourself. Okay, I'm officially nuts. Give the man a prize. Shut up.

The answering machine is blinking when I get home. I press the play button without much thought. More than likely it's Takeru. He seems to be the only one who ever calls me anymore.

"Hi, Yama. It's Taichi. I kinda thought you'd be home now. Anyway… I was calling to ask if you'd come to my soccer game tomorrow afternoon. I sort of have something I wanna talk to you about, and I thought that maybe we could do it after my game. Call me and let me know. Bye."

Taichi wants to talk to me? About what? He sounded serious. What if he knows? No, he can't know. There's no way he can. The only person that knows is Takeru, and he wouldn't tell Tai. No, knowing Taichi it's probably something stupid. He probably just wants some hair advice. Yeah, that's it.

I pick up the phone and dial.

"Yagami residence."

"Hello, Mrs. Yagami. This is Yamato. Is Taichi home?" I ask in my best polite voice.

"Oh hi, Yamato. No I'm sorry, he's out with Sora. Would you like me to have him call you back?"

Out with Sora. Isn't he always out with her? "No, that's all right. Umm…he called earlier to ask if I'd go to his game tomorrow. Could you tell him that I'm going?"

"I can do that."

"Okay. Thanks, Mrs. Yagami."

"Your welcome, Yamato."

"Goodbye."

"Bye."

I hang up and sigh. He calls me, comments on how I'm not home, and then he's not home when I call. How ironic.

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"Hey, Blue Eyes."

"Hey, Dai." I sit down next to him. The two of us get strange looks from Hikari, Takeru, Sora, and Ken, who are sitting nearby. Obviously they're unaware of my sudden friendship with Daisuke.

"How's your arm?"

I squint at Dai, suddenly reminded of our conversation the other day. "Fine. The same as it was when you saw it two days ago."

This catches Takeru's attention. "What happened to your arm?"

I sigh. "Slammed it in a car door. Nothing major."

Concerned blue eyes stare at me. "Are you sure?"

"Positive."

Daisuke gives me a triumphant smile, and it suddenly occurs to me that he's won. What he won, however, remains a mystery to me. "Aren't you a bit late?" he asks, reaching up to rearrange his goggles.

"Yeah," Sora agrees, "the game's nearly over." I manage to resist the urge to hurt her.

"Not really. Tai wants to talk to me after this is over, and I didn't really want to watch the whole game."

Daisuke nods. "Probably wants hair advice. God knows he could use it." I snap my head up to look at him. Now where have I heard that before? "What?"

"Nothing," I reply. "I just thought the same thing when he called." The game's over now, I notice as I continue looking forward.

"Well great minds think alike." He grins at me, and I can't help but grin back. "Speaking of big hair…"

I glance up to see Taichi standing in front of us. "Watch it, boy. I might just have to hurt you," he says as he playfully punches Daisuke. His forehead is glistening with sweat, and his uniform is sticking to his body. And he looks so gorgeous. "Hey, baby," he exclaims, and for an insane moment I think he's talking to me. I have to look away as Taichi and Sora kiss.

"Oh, disgusting! Stop that. No one wants to see it." Note to self: thank Takeru.

"Sorry." And with that Tai detaches himself from the demon that is Sora and fixes his gaze on me. "All right, Yama, let's go."

I feel strangely like a trained puppy as I stand up and begin to follow him. Yeah, a lovesick puppy.

"Bye, Blue Eyes," I hear after about two steps.

"Bye, Dai," I reply over my shoulder.

Taichi gives me a funny look. "He calls you 'Blue Eyes'?"

"Yeah. Why do you ask?"

He shakes his head. "I don't know. Just seems a little weird. A couple weeks ago, you two hardly ever spoke and now he has his own nickname for you."

He's jealous of Daisuke. The thought brings a slight smile to my lips. "I guess we're closer now." There's silence for a minute. "Didn't you say you wanted to talk to me about something?"

"Yeah, I did." He takes a deep breath, and I suddenly get a sick feeling in my stomach. "Look, Yama, I know that the two of us aren't exactly best friends anymore. We've kind of drifted apart, mainly because you're pushing me away. And I've done a lot of thinking lately, and I know why you're doing it."

Oh shit… "You do?" I'm having trouble breathing.

"Yeah, I do. I can't believe I never saw it before. It was so obvious." Obvious? Oh God…my life is over. He must hate me now. "I mean, you've been acting weird since Sora and I got together. And even weirder when you were around the two of us." He's going to hit me any second now. And then he's going to call me a 'faggot' just like in my dreams. "I just thought that maybe you thought that we wouldn't be best friends anymore or something, but Jesus…" Then he's going to get all of his soccer friends and they're going to beat me to a bloody pulp. And… "I can't believe I never saw that you were in love with her." What?

"Her?" What the hell is he talking about?

Taichi gives me a peculiar look. "Yeah, Sora."

"Sora?" Is he crazy? Me in love with Sora? "Tai, I don't like Sora."

He stares doubtfully at me. "Look, Yama, it's all right. You don't have to deny it. I know that you can't help it. And while it sort of bothered me at first, I'm fine with it now. It shows that you have good taste in women."

Taste in women? I have no taste in women. He's grinning at me now, which is infuriating. He's not even listening to me. "No, Taichi, you don't understand."

"I understand perfectly. You feel guilty because you are in love with Sora, and you really shouldn't feel guilty."

What is he smoking? First he accuses me of being in love with his girlfriend, then he acts all calm about it, and he's not even letting me speak. Okay, fine. He won't listen to me. I'll make him. Without another thought, I crush my lips to his. He stiffens, and I immediately regret that move.

When I pull back, I see him staring at me with wide eyes. "I tried to tell you. I'm not in love with Sora. I'm in love with you, Tai."

He doesn't say anything, just backs a step away from me. "I…I have…to go." And with that, he spins around and starts to run.

Tears start to well up in my eyes. Well, so much for relaxing for a few days. A sob escapes my throat as I fall to the ground, the tears finally flowing freely down my face.

Damn you, Taichi. Damn you for making me love you.