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Notes: I don't know why but somehow I just feel the need to put a note at the beginning of every single chapter. Maybe I should talk to a therapist. Anyway, another no-violence chapter. If you want a quick summary: a certain someone finally gets a verbal butt kicking and we get a bit of friendly fluff. Enjoy.

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Two more days gone have gone by. The policeman at my door left yesterday. I guess that means that Dollface thinks I'm sane. My father still hasn't come to visit me, not that I really expected him to. It still kind of hurts though.

You know, I've been in this hospital for four whole days. That's 96 hours. Quite frankly, I never want to see another hospital ever again. Because those 96 hours are all a blur to me. I wake up, eat, get a shot of Thorazine, go back to sleep, wake up, eat again, get more Thorazine, wake up, get evaluated by a doctor, eat more, and get another shot of Thorazine before going back to sleep.

Sick, sad world, yes, I know. But somehow I'm completely content this way. After all, in my drug-induced sleep I don't have to think about how horrible I feel. The slash on my arm, the bruises on my stomach, the black haze of depression in my head, it all just fades away.

"What're you thinking about?"

I jump slightly, startled at being thrown out of my thoughts. "Huh?"

Taichi gives me a grin. "You have this intense look on your face. I was asking what you were thinking about."

I shrug and continue picking at the green meat on my food tray. "Nothing much. Just thinking about how much I hate this hospital."

"Yeah, I got the idea that you don't enjoy being here."

My brother snorts maliciously. "Wow, Tai, you actually noticed something about him. It's about time. I'm proud of you." Thick drops of sarcasm ooze in his voice.

"Takeru…" I say warningly. He does this every time that Tai visits, making some derogatory comment about him or the way he treated me. I find it sorta sweet, that he's so protective of me. It reminds me of how I am with him.

But Taichi merely shakes his head. "No, it's all right, Yama. Your brother has every right to be mad at me."

"Be mad at you?" He gives another caustic laugh. "I have every right to hate you, you sadistic bastard!"

"Oh, if my sister could hear you now…"

"Then she'd agree with me! Everyone would agree with me! What you did was stupid!" I swear that there's steam coming out of his ears.

Tai runs a hand through his hair. "I'm not saying that it wasn't. In fact, I'm perfectly aware that it was. You just don't have to be so viscous about it. This isn't anything like you."

"You know, that is the exact same thing that I thought when Yamato was telling all about how you just ran off!"

By now, they have both stood from their chairs and are staring at each other dangerously. I'm positive that if I don't interrupt, Takeru is going to pounce on Taichi and strangle him to death. "Guys…"

But my brother ignores me and continues. "You know what? I remember telling him a long time ago to just tell you how he felt. I told him that you would be reasonable about it. I told, no, I promised him that you wouldn't hurt him, that you wouldn't hate him or hit him or run away from him. But you did run away, Tai. And you made me the liar."

I see Taichi's eyes soften a little at this. He opens his mouth to speak, but Takeru decides to keep going, dropping his voice to a low growl.

"Have you ever held your older brother, the self-proclaimed 'cool one', while he cries after some asshole decides to just run away and destroy every ounce of self-confidence that he ever had? No, Tai, you never have. So don't try to tell me how I should or shouldn't act. Because you have no idea." And with that, Takeru drops back down into his chair and stares emotionlessly at the bedspread.

Taichi stares at him with a shocked expression that I normally would have found humorous if it weren't for these circumstances. With a brief glance at the clock, he finally speaks. "I'd better go. I have a date with Sora." He winces visibly as he says it. "Oh God…I'm sorry, Yama. That was really stupid."

"Stop apologizing to me every single time you mention her name," I tell him feeling a little nauseous. How many times do I have to tell him that before he'll get it through his thick head?

Takeru smirks darkly. "Nice going, Yagami."

Tai's gaze moves to him for a second before returning to me. "I'm sorry, I just…" He pauses and then sighs. "I'll see you later, Yama."

The moment he disappears outside the door I hear Takeru growl under his breath. "God…"

I lean my head back against the bed. "Don't blame him. It's not his fault that he's a dense jerk."

"So it does upset you when he mentions Sora?"

"Of course it does. But I can live with it. What bothers me is that he feels this need to apologize every time he does. I just want to burst into tears and then rip out my hair when he does." I pause before giving him a gentle look. "You didn't have to yell at him, you know."

"Yes I did," he claims as he rolls his eyes. "Taichi needed someone to put him in his place, and I was more than happy to do it. You may have forgiven him, but that doesn't mean that I have to."

Another grin finds it way onto my face. Never have I ever seen my brother actually hate someone as much as he does Tai right now. He really is starting to act like me. Well, sort of.

I can't hate Tai. Not beautiful, funny, thickheaded, stupid, big-haired Tai. It's beyond me to hate him. Oh no, here we go again…

I'm lying to myself. I said that I could get over him, that I could live without him, that I could be okay. And it's all a lie.

At least before I had this dream of being with him. It's the one where he realizes he's in love with me, dumps Sora, and we live happily ever after. I suppose that I've been reading too much yaoi fan fiction on the Internet lately.

But now I don't even have my dream anymore. It's been shattered into a million pieces. And it hurts like hell.

"Excuse me. Yamato Ishida?" I glance up at the doctor who's just walked in. "Hello, I'm Dr. Turco. I would like to talk with you for a little bit."

Whoa, a new one. I move my gaze to Takeru, and he gives me a sympathetic look. "I'll take that as my cue to go get something to eat," he says standing up.

Dr. Turco gives him a grateful smile before turning back to me. "So, Yamato, how are you feeling?"

"All right. My wrist stings and I'm tired, but other than that I'm fine." I learned days ago to cooperate with the doctors and give them small details. Otherwise they just ask more questions until they get it out of you.

"Hmm," he mumbles as he looks over my chart. "And how about emotionally?"

I shrug. "I'm better than I was when I first was admitted. I don't feel as dejected, and I'm not suicidal anymore."

"You're not?"

"No. In fact, I kind of regret doing what I did. It was a really stupid thing to do."

"You aren't just saying that so that you can get out of here, are you?"

I snicker. "If I still wanted to kill myself, don't you think I would have jumped out of that window by now?"

"I suppose." He grins a little. Wow, nothing like the other doctors that have been in here to talk to me.

"Speaking of which, when am I being released?"

"I'm not sure actually. It all depends on your psychiatric evaluation, which is scheduled for tomorrow. If they think you're all right, you could be out tomorrow. And if not, you might be staying for a while."

I let out a sigh and stare at the food tray that still sits in front of me. Let me pass that evaluation. I can't survive any more of this food.

"Listen, Yamato," Dr. Turco says as he scoots a bit closer, "I wanted to ask you about the bruises on your wrist and your stomach. Can you tell me about them?"

Ha, I knew this was coming sometime or another. "Sure," I answer. Stay calm, stay cool, don't sweat. "I got in a fight in school with this guy."

"A fight?" His eyebrows furrow with slight doubt.

"Yeah. This guy was saying some stuff about me, so I cornered him and told him off. Then when I tried to walk away, he grabbed my wrist to stop me. I thought he was going to break it, hence the bruise. Then we threw a few punches before he knocked me to the ground and kicked me repeatedly in the stomach. Of course, then I pulled him down with me and kicked the crap out of him. Wouldn't be surprised if I punctured a lung." Is it obvious that I've practiced this?

Dr. Turco looks more convinced now. "Hmm. You're sure it was just a fight?"

"No, I just hallucinated it," I say sarcastically.

He gives me a look. "Okay. Just making sure."

"Is that all you wanted to ask?"

Another glance at my chart. "Yes. I suppose you want me out of here, not that I blame you. I'm sure you're sick of doctors."

I give him a small smile. "Something like that." And with a wave, he leaves my room. Stupid doctors…

My wrist is still black, of course. Maybe a tiny bit lighter, but it's still black. I've nearly gotten used to it. Of course, now I've got the other one to get used to. Why did I have to cut my wrist? Why couldn't I have overdosed so I wouldn't have any scars to look at afterward?

The sound of a throat being cleared interrupts my thoughts. I jerk my head up and smile at the sight of those familiar goggles.

"Hello, Dai."

"Hey, Blue Eyes. How's it going?" Daisuke set his bag next to the wall before taking a seat in the chair beside my bed.

"I'm all right." You know, I'm sick of telling people that.

"You look better."

"I do?"

He nods. "Yeah, a lot. You're not as pale and your eyes are sparkling again."

I raise my eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

"You have this sparkle in your eye. You lost it a few days ago, and your eyes just sort of dulled. They turned kinda gray. But it's back now." His head cocks to one side and stares into my eyes.

I force an uncomfortable laugh. "You really like my eyes, don't you?"

"I like eyes in general. I mean, you can learn a lot from a person's eyes. Ken's eyes, for example, have a violet tinge to them. Violet is a unique color for eyes. That says that he's a lot different than most people, and he is. But it also says that he's shy, you know, like a shy violet. And it's rare that people are naturally shy, so that tells me that he's has a sad story to tell."

Daisuke pauses momentarily to gaze at me. "You have incredible eyes, like sapphires or something. And like I said before, they sparkle like a sapphire. So I guess that makes you a gem, doesn't it? You keep yourself hidden from everyone else because you know that they'll ruin you, make you into some worthless piece of women's jewelry. Am I right, Blue Eyes?"

I feel strangely exposed, and I'm not entirely sure why. "You are full of surprises, aren't you, Dai?" There really is more to him than people know. "But I'm sure you didn't come here to talk about my eyes."

A faint blush spreads across his cheeks. "No, I had Ken's mom drop me off so that I could…um…give you something."

"Give me something? What?"

He slips out of the chair and picks up his bag. "Well, I was talking to Hikari yesterday and she said that all of the digidestined were chipping in and getting a bunch of roses or something, which by the way, you should be getting tonight. But I told her not to include me 'cause I was going to give you something else." He gives me a nervous grin. "After all, who wants roses after a suicide attempt? So I bought you something."

I raise my eyebrows once again as I take the poorly wrapping box from his hands. An amused chuckle finds its way out of my mouth when I see what he's bought. "Hair gel? You're giving me four containers of hair gel?"

"Yeah," he says as he runs his fingers through his hair.

"You didn't have to…"

Daisuke raises his hand, cutting me off. "I know, but I wanted to."

I give him another smile. "Thank you." I pause, suddenly remembering something. "Hey Dai, get over here. I owe you a hug."

"From when?"

"From when you gave me that lecture on how people care about me. If my arms weren't strapped down, I would've done it then. But I'm doing it now. So get over here."

"You know Blue Eyes," he says as he puts his arms around me, "you are turning into a real softy."

I grin as I pull away. "Yeah, I think it's the drugs. Besides, you just gave me a bunch of new hair gel. How else am I supposed to act?"

He shrugs and sits back in the chair. "So is it better than roses?"

"Way better than roses. God, who wants roses in a hospital anyway?"

"Yeah, that's what I thought." He pulls off his goggles and throws them on top of his bag. "So…talk."

I give him a confused look. "About what?"

"Oh, anything. I've got an hour before I get picked up." Suddenly he smirks widely. "Hey, got any embarrassing stories about your brother?"

I mirror his expression. "Oh, I might just have a couple…"

And it's times like these that I really understand just how much I miss having a close friend.