Hey, a new section. Go me! I really like Snapple. And I am really annoyed by the DiC dub.
Sailormoon doesn't belong to me, and anything I may make obscure references to probably doesn't belong to me either.
Booyaka! ~NV22~
***
Back to Evil Mastermind Guy's funky evil mastermindly four-dimensional pad (If we had left, that is. No one's exactly sure anymore.). EMG faced off against the ten Sailor Senshi, three Sailor Starlights, and three cats.
"Hmm. These odds aren't so great," he observed. "I'm gonna open a can of omnipotent whoop-ass on you!"
"Wanna bet?" Uranus replied. "World Shaking!"
"Owie owie owie!" Evil Mastermind Guy complained, hopping around on one foot like...something that hops around on one foot. I dunno. You make the comparison.
Uranus rolled her eyes. "Would you like some cheese to go with your whine?" she asked.
"Ooh, sarcastic and clever comeback," Neptune said. "I like." She and Uranus ran off into the woods (woods?) to play Wounded Baby Unicorn and Skinny Sociopathic Janitor. Go figure.
Seeing this, Pluto, Saturn, and the Starlights decided that they weren't really needed, developing a case of 'we're-better-than-you-pathetic-inner-senshi'-itis. Go figure.
"Ha ha!" EMG yelled, doing a little victory dance. "I have already eliminated seven of you! Seven whole senshi! Well, four whole senshi and three confused strippers. But they're gone! Who's the man, huh? Who?"
"Not you," Mars said. "Mars Flame Fire Burning Sniper Soul Mandala!" she shrieked, unpredictably releasing her every flame attack on Evil Mastermind Guy, who was perplexed through his tears and burns.
"How can you do that?" he asked.
"How can you?" Venus echoed. "I wanna try." She took a deep breath. "VenusLoveandBeautyShockVenusLove-MeChainCrescent BeamShowerCrescentBeam!"
Nothing happened.
"What?" Venus shrieked. "You were supposed to die!" She tilted back her head and started to wail. "Jupiter-chan! He won't die!! Gettemgettemgettemgettemgettemgettem!"
Jupiter rolled her eyes. "Do I gotta? This is so stupid."
"GETTEMGETTEMGETTEMGETTEMGETTEMGETTEM!!!!"
"Geez, okay. Supreme Thunder! Supreme Thunder Dragon! Sparkling Wide Pressure! Jupiter Oak Evolution!" she shouted, impressing (or boring) the readers with the author's vast knowledge of Sailor Senshi attacks.
"Do your dub attacks, too!" Venus said. "That might work!"
"Gaa!" Jupiter yelled. "I hate saying those stupid dub phrases. They're so annoying!"
Venus took a deep breath, ready to scream again.
"Okay, okay!" Jupiter conceded, holding up her hands. "Jupiter Thunder...CRASH! Jupiter Thunder...DRAGON! Jupiter Thunderclap...ZAP!"
Many, many attacks hit Evil Mastermind Guy. He was very upset, and probably cried. But we never heard, because Venus was too busy wailing about him not being dead.
"Why isn't he dead yet? I'm Sailor Venus, I fight for love and crap like that, and I'm going to hurt you! Venus Crescent Beam...SMASH! Venus Meteor...SHOWER! Venus Love Chain... ENCIRCLE!" She took a moment to pause, make a disgusted face at using the hideous dub attacks and take a deep breath. "Crescent Beam! Crescent Beam Shower! Venus Love-Me Chain! Venus Love and Beauty Shock!"
Beams and hearts and chains and more beams and more hearts and more chains struck Evil Mastermind Guy, who was on the verge of throwing a temper tantrum. But unfortunately, he was still alive.
"Hey, whaddya mean 'unfortunately?'" Evil Mastermind Guy yelled, looking at the author. "I thought we were friends."
I meant unfortunately for the senshi, you self-esteem-less freak. Geez, would you pay attention to what's going on? Here, we'll give you a team of 'senshi' of your own, okay? Deal with them yourselves.
"Aha!" EMG shouted. "I now have my own team to destroy you. Feel my wrath, you pathetic wretches!"
Six warriors stood in shadow, holding stupid poses. "Come forth, my minions!" The six shadowy people came out. The senshi gasped in horror. For the mystery guests were none other than...
"The Power Rangers!" Sailor Moon yelled. "NO!!!!"
***
Damn, I'm dramatic.
***
After some intense discussion, the author and Evil Mastermind Guy decided that this would be a lot more entertaining if the senshi and the Power Rangers took each other on on a national television show. So they decided on MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch. Rockin'! Of course, the senshi and the Rangers agreed immediately; they were quite enthusiastic about kickin' some respective ass.
So, without further ado, I bring you Celebrity Deathmatch!
***FIN***
Sailormoon doesn't belong to me, and anything I may make obscure references to probably doesn't belong to me either.
Booyaka! ~NV22~
***
Back to Evil Mastermind Guy's funky evil mastermindly four-dimensional pad (If we had left, that is. No one's exactly sure anymore.). EMG faced off against the ten Sailor Senshi, three Sailor Starlights, and three cats.
"Hmm. These odds aren't so great," he observed. "I'm gonna open a can of omnipotent whoop-ass on you!"
"Wanna bet?" Uranus replied. "World Shaking!"
"Owie owie owie!" Evil Mastermind Guy complained, hopping around on one foot like...something that hops around on one foot. I dunno. You make the comparison.
Uranus rolled her eyes. "Would you like some cheese to go with your whine?" she asked.
"Ooh, sarcastic and clever comeback," Neptune said. "I like." She and Uranus ran off into the woods (woods?) to play Wounded Baby Unicorn and Skinny Sociopathic Janitor. Go figure.
Seeing this, Pluto, Saturn, and the Starlights decided that they weren't really needed, developing a case of 'we're-better-than-you-pathetic-inner-senshi'-itis. Go figure.
"Ha ha!" EMG yelled, doing a little victory dance. "I have already eliminated seven of you! Seven whole senshi! Well, four whole senshi and three confused strippers. But they're gone! Who's the man, huh? Who?"
"Not you," Mars said. "Mars Flame Fire Burning Sniper Soul Mandala!" she shrieked, unpredictably releasing her every flame attack on Evil Mastermind Guy, who was perplexed through his tears and burns.
"How can you do that?" he asked.
"How can you?" Venus echoed. "I wanna try." She took a deep breath. "VenusLoveandBeautyShockVenusLove-MeChainCrescent BeamShowerCrescentBeam!"
Nothing happened.
"What?" Venus shrieked. "You were supposed to die!" She tilted back her head and started to wail. "Jupiter-chan! He won't die!! Gettemgettemgettemgettemgettemgettem!"
Jupiter rolled her eyes. "Do I gotta? This is so stupid."
"GETTEMGETTEMGETTEMGETTEMGETTEMGETTEM!!!!"
"Geez, okay. Supreme Thunder! Supreme Thunder Dragon! Sparkling Wide Pressure! Jupiter Oak Evolution!" she shouted, impressing (or boring) the readers with the author's vast knowledge of Sailor Senshi attacks.
"Do your dub attacks, too!" Venus said. "That might work!"
"Gaa!" Jupiter yelled. "I hate saying those stupid dub phrases. They're so annoying!"
Venus took a deep breath, ready to scream again.
"Okay, okay!" Jupiter conceded, holding up her hands. "Jupiter Thunder...CRASH! Jupiter Thunder...DRAGON! Jupiter Thunderclap...ZAP!"
Many, many attacks hit Evil Mastermind Guy. He was very upset, and probably cried. But we never heard, because Venus was too busy wailing about him not being dead.
"Why isn't he dead yet? I'm Sailor Venus, I fight for love and crap like that, and I'm going to hurt you! Venus Crescent Beam...SMASH! Venus Meteor...SHOWER! Venus Love Chain... ENCIRCLE!" She took a moment to pause, make a disgusted face at using the hideous dub attacks and take a deep breath. "Crescent Beam! Crescent Beam Shower! Venus Love-Me Chain! Venus Love and Beauty Shock!"
Beams and hearts and chains and more beams and more hearts and more chains struck Evil Mastermind Guy, who was on the verge of throwing a temper tantrum. But unfortunately, he was still alive.
"Hey, whaddya mean 'unfortunately?'" Evil Mastermind Guy yelled, looking at the author. "I thought we were friends."
I meant unfortunately for the senshi, you self-esteem-less freak. Geez, would you pay attention to what's going on? Here, we'll give you a team of 'senshi' of your own, okay? Deal with them yourselves.
"Aha!" EMG shouted. "I now have my own team to destroy you. Feel my wrath, you pathetic wretches!"
Six warriors stood in shadow, holding stupid poses. "Come forth, my minions!" The six shadowy people came out. The senshi gasped in horror. For the mystery guests were none other than...
"The Power Rangers!" Sailor Moon yelled. "NO!!!!"
***
Damn, I'm dramatic.
***
After some intense discussion, the author and Evil Mastermind Guy decided that this would be a lot more entertaining if the senshi and the Power Rangers took each other on on a national television show. So they decided on MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch. Rockin'! Of course, the senshi and the Rangers agreed immediately; they were quite enthusiastic about kickin' some respective ass.
So, without further ado, I bring you Celebrity Deathmatch!
***FIN***