Note: This story takes place when all the kids are in the 5th grade.
It was Christmas Eve. "It's a Wonderful Life" was on the television and the neighboorhood children were singing carols outside on the street. Pheobe was there, along with the rest of her fifth grade class. And Arnold. Yes, singing carols was right up his alley. In fact it had been his grandpa that had suggested it in the first place. For a moment Helga wished that she was outside singing. No, she thought to herself. It would only make it worse to be singing happy holiday songs only to return to her own lonely house while the others went home with their happy families. It was better this way, to pretend that it was just an average Saturday night. No joy but yet no let downs.
She tried to focus her attention on the movie. It was one of her favorites. Although it was centered around a holiday that she despised it gave her hope. Perhaps one day her life would have a happy ending, at least it gave her something to look forward to in life. She tried to remember how much she had loved this movie. Then she remembered the phone call she had received earlier that evening.
~~~~~~~~~~
"Yeah?" Helga had said as she pressed the phone against her ear.
"Olga?" said a gruff voice.
"I'm Helga Bob."
"Whatever. Listen Olga I picked up your mother from the shopping center. We're going over to the store now to talk to some clients."
"But Dad it's Christmas Eve."
"Exaclty. It's a big season for beepers. Anyway I have to go. There's some Macoroni and Cheese in the cabinet. Make yourself dinner."
"But Dad-" Helga started to say. It was too late though. She was talking to a dialtone.
Helga had tried to forget the phone call. About being alone on one of the biggest family holidays of the year. Jimmy Stewart was blaring now, trying to drown out the caroling in the street. As she stared intently at the television set she heard a knock at the door. Placing the now cold mac and cheese on the coffee table, she rose to answer the door. Who would actually come here on Christmas Eve, thought Helga. Everyone she knew would be home with their families.
"Helga open up!" came a familiar voice from behind the door. The voice of a boy with emerald green eyes and hair the color of cornflowers.
"You know Helga," came the muffled voice outside the door."maybe if you weren't such a scrooge you'd be outside singing instead of watching an old movie on television."
That hurt her. She had once again alienated the one she loved. But this was the first time he had ever really hurt her on purpose. Helga turned off the TV and sat on the couch. Maybe I went to far that time, she thought to herself. But how can I be expected to be kind and loving when no one has ever shown me how? Crimety, I'm ten years old sitting alone in my house on Christmas Eve.
She laid down on the couch staring at the cealing. Suddenly she was tired, tired of her life, tired of being bully. Maybe in some way she was tired of living.
Quietly, as she fell asleep on the couch she mumbled to herself "I wish I was never even born".
And she meant it.
*****
This is my first fanfic and I have the rest all ready. If you think it's good enough to finish then I'll post the rest but if you think it's horrible then I won't waste my time. R&R please!
*****