"When it all comes down to it, we all just want to be loved."
-Jamie Yellen
The end!!! The OFFICIAL end. The end after the end! (this took me all day to finish the final product to put it on FF.net, can you tell I'm a little ecstatic??)
Haruka silently walked the halls of her apartment, involuntarily stopping when she realized she walked into Hotaru's old room. Hotaru had been gone for almost 2 months, but it still felt as if, if Haruka turned her back, she would see her reading a book, or painting in the living room. She walked across the room and sat on her old bed. Nothing had been the same since Hotaru left, even though Haruka hadn't wanted to admit it. Setsuna seemed more distant than ever, Michiru was more aggressive towards people, and Haruka was softer spoken.
Michiru gazed at her lover through the doorway. Michiru was worried that she was losing Haruka, that she would never cope with the loss. She had stopped being so protective, and didn't put her all into races anymore. The last track meet she abstained from, and the previous competitions she had dropped significantly in placing. The Inner Senshi had changed, too. Ami threw herself into her studies, with out actually studying or learning anything. Minako and Makoto seemed to hang of each other, afraid that one would lose the other. Rei hardly ever left her shrine, save for school. And no matter how much anyone tried, Usagi was thrown into depression, hardly eating anything. Mamoru had helped her a bit, and as she recovered, he had proposed, seeing that she turned 20 and her parents agreed to marriage, as long as she still went to university. Setsuna was hardly seen, but that was expected, since the Awakening of Crystal Tokyo would happen soon, probably around the time Usagi and Mamoru were to be wed. Over time, most of the Inner Senshi had adapted, but one could tell, behind their social masks, they were still hurting, and the upcoming wedding was something to hide the false emotions in.
The pain was expected, but even Michiru was surprised how long the grieving period had lasted. Probably because the other Senshi never had a chance to help Saturn, they had been taken down too quickly. Pluto said that they had fallen because Master 45 had warped the planet of Saturn, using some of Saturn's powers against them. He had used spectres of the past to fight, playing mind games with them as he attacked. They could have engaged the usual youma or Daimon Master quickly, but they had collapsed from the use of one Senshi's powers against them.
'I guess nobody really gave her credit for how much she could do.' Michiru reflected as her thoughts went back to the trauma. Hotaru had destroyed Master 45 so swiftly, so efficiently, that he never had a chance. With that one blast, she had vaporized everything, returning all the energy he had stolen.
After the battle, when everyone returned from death, everyone had been surprised to find that all the planets and moons had been restored, grace to Hotaru's gift of Rebirth. She had rebuilt everything, preparing almost everything for the Awakening.
Michiru sighed as she walked away from Haruka, who remained in Hotaru's room. Everyone missed Hotaru, and wondered daily if she was ok. Michiru walked into the living room, too wrapped up in thought to realize that Setsuna sat on the couch, reading intently through a large, leather bound book that looked to be at least a couple millennia old.
"Hello." she said, still absorbed in the old book, and scaring the heck out of Michiru, who jumped a half metre.
"Good graces, you scared me!" Michiru gasped as she tried to regain her senses. "What are you reading?" she asked, somewhat hurt that she could be so wrapped up in something when everyone else was so disheartened.
"It's an ancient spell book, one written by the elder gods. I got my job back, I had a talk with Fate, we decided that everything's moved up ahead of schedule, and that something needs to be done about the planetary council – namely, you guys." she said as she flipped through the pages. As Setsuna looked over at Michiru, who had a clueless look on her face, she cleared things up.
"Don't worry. It'll all turn out for the best. Everything will arise with Usagi and Mamoru's wedding. It's just that the council is missing a member. To get that member back, one has to find a way past all the laws and red tape." She said.
"WHAT WAS THAT???" Haruka yelled from upstairs, and within seconds, she was before Setsuna, staring at her. "You are referring to Hotaru… right?" She said as she bounded to Setsuna and started shaking her shoulders.
"Yes, who else? And would you please let go of me!" she said firmly, prying Haruka's hands off her.
"Crystal Tokyo can't arise if Saturn's dead."
"Well… wait, she was reborn before, what's different about this time?" Michiru asked.
"It has to do with the amount of power she tapped into to destroy Master 45, and how she saved us from Death." Setsuna replied, still intently reading her book.
"Is it something like how you can't use your powers to stop time?" Haruka asked, frowning as she tried to make sense of all that she said.
"Yes," was the short reply from Setsuna, as she put a bookmark in between the pages and turned to another.
"But you were pardoned! Why can't Hotaru be forgiven as well?" Haruka demanded, hitting her hand against the table.
"She has been. I'm just trying to find a way to bring her back. She won't come back if she doesn't want to.
" So all we have to do is convince her why she's important to us?" Haruka said, a trace of hope in her voice.
"To the world." Setsuna said. "But it's still not the easiest thing to do, to convince someone to come to Hell compared to the paradise they're in now.
"Can't we just go talk to her?" Michiru asked, looking over Setsuna's shoulder at the large book.
"If I could, don't you think I would have already?" Setsuna said glaring at Michiru with a cold look in her eyes. Setsuna saw Michiru recoil at her harsh words and sighed.
"Gomenasai, I- I didn't mean it like that. This is just so frustrating…" She said, he voice wavering.
"It's not your fault, Setsuna. We'll get her back." Haruka said as she sat down beside her.
"Well, anyway, Chibi-Usa gave me this book, from the future. I don't know where she found out about it, but if there's anyway to get Hotaru back, this book will say how." Setsuna said, resuming her study of the oversized tome.
"You'd think Chibi-Usa knew all along about this." Haruka said with amusement.
"She probably did. She was very close to the future Hotaru. Fact is, before she was erased from the future, she sent a parting message to Small Lady. That's probably how she got this idea to bring her back."
"Setsuna, what happens if Hotaru doesn't want to come back?" Michiru whispered, almost afraid of the answer.
Setsuna shook her head. "I don't know. I just don't know. The timeline balances on a yes or no. But maybe we're not the ones to ask her…"
*****
You want to go home, don't you? You worry about your friends and the princess.
It's my duty to protect them.
But they can hold their own… that's not the reason you want to go…
… I miss them.
And they miss you. You should go…
But what about you?
I've always waited for you… why should that change?
If I leave I won't remember anything…
We can bend that rule a little… you'll only remember me. That's it. I can't let you remember this place, not just yet. In time…
I'll miss you, though.
I'll always be with you. That has never changed, why should it now?
You're sure about this?
Even if you can't admit it, this is what you want. And I want my daughter to be happy.
I don't know if I'll be happy with them again, though. What if I'm not happy?
You will. That's why you haven't been completely happy here. You want to see them again. And they want to see you. As much as I don't want to admit it, you can't stay here forever. Crystal Tokyo needs a Sailor Saturn.
But I want a mother. And a happy life. I'll never have that if I go back…
Life is what you make of it. So go make your life. And are you forgetting that you have three mothers there?
No… it's just not the same.
Maybe it's not, but they love you. They miss you terribly. Their whole future depends on you.
I'm that important?
You always have been.
Thank you, okaa-san.
Remember that I'll always love you.
I love you, too.
Take care, little firefly.
*****
I walked down the street, hand in hand with mama. I knew, deep down that she wasn't my mother, my real mother, more a surrogate one, but I still loved her just as much as my own. My real one has been dead for millennia, but I knew her. The way she walked, the sound of her voice as she called me, how she smelled of lilacs… it was the only memory I carried on my own with me through this new life. A couple weeks ago a ghost calling herself Saturn, whom I later learned was myself, appeared and gave me my memories. Again. The ones of the last couple times I died, and the last battle I didn't really walk away from. I remembered my friends, and I want to meet them, to tell them I'm okay. To see how they are, but I wasn't sure if I should, or if they already knew. Pluto must know, she usually knows these things. I'll probably be seeing her soon, since, if I got my powers back, then there's either a new enemy or something else I'm needed for. And if I'm needed, then she'll come get me. But maybe not.
My mother looked down at me, and I smiled back. I loved having a mother. My new father died before I actually knew him, but to everyone else, he died of a heart attack when I was 8. Ah, thanks to the graces of fast aging. I wondered if anyone actually noticed, that I had grown 17 years in one month. To me it seemed terribly obvious, but no one ever questioned it, so I was set. Records must have been changed somewhere, but hey, I wanted to enjoy this situation before it was ripped out from under me. I guess this really puts emphasis on "It seems almost yesterday…" Hell, it was yesterday, for most things…
I pushed my hair over my shoulder as I continued to walk down the sidewalk. How I was annoyed with long hair. It seemed everytime I cut my hair, it grew back to the below waist length it stayed at. It must be this advanced growing stage thing. How I wished I could grow at a normal length. Hey, you would to if you had to go through puberty in 2 days. That might have been more painful that anything else I have ever been through.
Mama and I looked through windows in the busy downtown-shopping district. It was a beautiful day, and mother had wanted to get me out in the sun more. After a while, I finally agreed to go shopping with her, only to save myself from going to the beach. Which was fine, since this woman seemed to love spoiling me! I could really get used to this, I thought as she dragged me into another store. A half hour later, and 500 dollars later, we emerged from the store, 4 more shopping bags in hand. Did I mention how rich she was? She bought stuff like it was nothing, not even batting her eyes at a price tag that could have fed a small village in Africa for a year! I still thought it was amazing how she could just snap her fingers and get anything she wants.
While in a way I admired that, I wasn't quite accustomed to having this much attention spent solely on me. Nope, didn't like it one bit. I wanna go home…. But where is my home?
As we walked further down the street, I thought I saw a familiar face, but as I looked for it more intently, it was quickly lost in the busy crowd. Who was that?
*****
"Oh… my… god…" Haruka slowly murmured as she stared off into a busy crown of people. Her and Michiru were downtown, buying some violin strings for Michiru and new track shoes for Haruka.
"What? What's the matter?' Michiru asked, noticing Haruka stopped abruptly and stared through a bunch of people.
"I… I thought I saw… never mind." Haruka cut off, slowly shaking her head. "I'm just seeing things." She continued walking, but Michiru cast her an askew glance.
"No, it's something else. What did you see?" She asked, and frowned slightly as Haruka kept walking, deep in thought. Suddenly, she turned back to Michiru, and gazed back where she was previously looking.
"I-I thought I saw Hotaru… but I couldn't have… Can we go already? I'd like to get home." She said softly, but Michiru picked up on the hint of sadness in her eyes.
"Okay, we have everything we need." She said as she walked down the street, Haruka walking a little faster than usual.
"What's got you so on edge?'" Michiru asked, trying to match Haruka's brisk pace.
Haruka turned to answer her, but before she could utter a response, she bumped into someone, sending them sprawling to the ground.
*****
I was about the cross the street when I was knocked of my feet by someone. I quickly got back up, picked up my parcels and bags, and bowed my apologies to whoever it was. When I heard a stiff gasp, I looked up to see who I bumped into.
I gasped as well when I saw whom it was, and was starting to get anxious as I saw them there with their mouths agape and staring blankly at me. What are they doing? Are they going to say something, or just stand there with their mouths open all day?
"Ohayo, Haruka-papa, Michiru-mama." I said, knowing that they weren't going to get their wits back for sometime.
*****
Haruka just stared at her, unable to believe that she had just knocked down Hotaru. Every alarm in her mind was going off 'SHE'S DEAD! ISN'T SHE? OH COURSE NOT, BAKA! SHE'S RIGHT HERE IN FRONT OF YOU!' Her mind cried out, but her heart leapt for joy at the prospect that Hotaru was standing right in front if her.
"Please respond in any way to show that you're not both mindless zombies…" Hotaru said gently, as Haruka noticed the uneasiness on her face. Michiru rushed forwards and swept her up in a tight embrace, taking her quite by surprise. Haruka stood looking at her, as a tear ran down her cheek.
Haruka now took this time to look at Hotaru. She was older, probably around 17 or 18 now, but she carried an aura Haruka had never seen on her. She was a little taller, but she turned into a beautiful woman, almost a spitting image of her mother. Her cheeks were flushed, but she still managed to glow. Her hair reached down to her hips, but she had half of it braided on the top of her head. Her eyes still held that deepness, but they also shown in rapture.
As Haruka snapped out of her thoughts, she noticed Hotaru standing before her, gazing into her eyes. "Hotaru, I-" she began, before Hotaru shot her a reproachful look and cut her off.
"It wasn't your fault. It never has been, and even if it were, I would forgive you in an instant. It happened, now it's over, and I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!" Hotaru said as she rushed up to hug her, Haruka stood there for a moment before finally returning the hug. She could feel Hotaru's tears soak through her shirt, but it didn't matter, as her own were flowing down her face.
"I missed you too…" Haruka blurted out before her voice cut off. When they finally broke their embrace, she looked into Hotaru's eyes. They still were wet from crying, but they radiantly shone with happiness.
"When did you come back?" Michiru asked, smiling for the first time in what seemed like ages.
"OH! That reminds me…" Hotaru said as she dashed off. She stopped by a woman that was looking for someone, and by the way her face brightened when she saw Hotaru, Haruka guessed that she was looking for her. Haruka went to walk towards the two, but Michiru gently held her hand, holding her back.
"Let them have their moment." She whispered to her, and Haruka stopped, still looking at them. She watched Hotaru whisper something to her, and as the woman turned to look at her, Hotaru pressed her finger upon her forehead. It glowed slightly for a moment, then the woman blinked a couple times, taking in her surroundings. Hotaru conversed with her, and from what Haruka heard, Hotaru gave her directions to… the Post Office?
Haruka looked strangely at the woman, who seemed to get her bearings and thank Hotaru, hurrying off in the direction Hotaru pointed. Hotaru walked back to the others, who looked strangely.
"She asked where the Post office was." Hotaru said matter-of-factly.
"Come on, then. Lets go home, and we'll invite the others over for dinner and
such." Michiru said, taking hold of Hotaru's hand and pulling her off in the
direction of Haruka's convertible. Haruka pushed from behind as Hotaru tried to
pull away from the two.
"Oh, no… can't you just call them, 'Hi, how's it goin? Hotaru's alive. See ya!' and leave it at that? I don't want everyone fussing over me…" Hotaru wined as they pulled her towards the car.
"Nah, we wanna see the looks on their faces when they see you." Haruka said.
"But I don't wanna!" Hotaru whined as she was shoved into the backseat. Secretly, when the others were looking, she smiled brightly. 'Finally… I'm home.'
*****
Chibi-Usa sat on the swing in the park, slowly pushing herself as she thought deeply. 'What happened in the past? What about Hotaru?' she thought as she looked up to the stars above. She hadn't even noticed that it was now night, she was so entranced in contemplation. She stifled a gasp as someone pushed her from behind, swinging her higher. She strained to see behind her, but she couldn't make out who it was in the darkness.
"Miss me?" a familiar voice called out, and Chibi-Usa cried out in delight.
"Have I!" she said as she jumped off the swing in midair, landing on the ground heavily. She turned and threw her hands around Hotaru, hugging her tightly.
"I thought you'd never come back…" she said as she started crying softly.
"You can't get rid of me that easily." Hotaru replied as she found her own face wet with tears.
終
り
the
end