Note: This is the sequel to 'Useless'. The song is 'Forever Yours' by Nightwish. (Thank you, Ocy!) This fic takes place a few days after 'Useless'. Italics means song lyrics, bold lettering means memories.
And I Cry//Fare thee well, little broken heart
Downcast eyes, lifetime loneliness//
She hadn't cried once. Not once over the course of the past few days had she cried.
Molly stood over the grave. The day had gone off without a hitch.
She almost wished something had go wrong – he'd at least been as memorable in death as in life.
Today had been the funeral. She's stood there, and been bitterly reassured by the fact that Austin was facing court charges and up to life in jail.
All of his brothers had been there. She would have been afraid of what they might do to her there, but she didn't have the energy left. And they looked like they wanted to kill her, kill her like Austin had killed Spike. Or worse. With them, you couldn't know, she kept saying in her head.
And it still didn't scare her.
They seemed even angrier that most of the regrets had gone to her, not to Spike's own family. Lita, one of her closer friends, stayed next to her the entire day, hovering near her right elbow, and offered to let her stay with her and Matt. Of course she didn't accept – Molly felt more alone than she ever had, and somehow, she wanted to be alone.
At her left, Crash buzzed near her. He hadn't left her alone, either. He'd kept muttering to himself: "I didn't mean to…" and trailed off. Molly suspected that he felt far more guilt than Stone Cold did over his death – Spike had never been anything but civil to Crash, and Crash was the one who had begun their arguing.
If it hadn't been for Lita and Crash, the Dudleys probably would have ripped her to pieces already – and she didn't care.
//Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone//
Molly didn't want to go to the funeral - but something in her said, 'You love him, this is his last hurrah.' How could she not?
It had been an open casket funeral. She had barely been able to force herself to go near the casket. Spike looked almost alive.
She'd shut her eyes tight and taken a deep breath, and slowly approached the coffin. He looked like he was sleeping in a suit. She had to keep telling herself he'd be asleep forever.
When they had gone to bury him, She'd had to turn away. She wanted to run to them and knock on the coffin, and scream, "You can't put him in there! In there, with the dark, the worms, the dirt and the roots…"
But of course, she'd shut her eyes tight and held Lita's and Crash's hands tightly, and listened to the dirt crash onto the coffin and the shovel scratch the earth.
//Constant longing for the perfect soul
Unwashed scenery forever gone//
Hardcore and Crash had wanted to leave just after the burial. Hardcore'd grabbed her. "Everyone's gone. Let's go. It's over."
But Molly had pulled away. "No. You can go if you want to. But I'm staying here."
Hardcore had gotten angry at that. "What're you going to do, sleep by his grave?!" He grabbed Crash, who protested faintly, and the two of them left, leaving her there.
Then, there were very few people left - only Spike's family and closer friends - and Michael Cole and Tazz, who both stood solemnly by the graveside.
Bubba Ray and D – Von came over, eyes set firmly on her. Bubba stood very close to her, leaning in her face, and she could smell his breath. "This is your fault... you hear me?! You killed him. You're the reason that he died. If it wasn't for you, Spike never would have been stupid enough to challenge Stone Cold. You fucking bitch, you killed him!" Bubba shouted.
Molly stood very still, swallowing a large lump in her throat.
"You ought to pay for that! Like he did for you! Why are you alive, huh? Why is he dead and you aren't?" D - Von growled at her. There was a very grim sort of satisfaction in his voice.
She shook her head mutely. Spike had wanted her to live.
And then she found someone standing between her and the two angry Dudleys.
"Hey, hey, Bubba, D - Von, cool it. It isn't her fault. She couldn't've stopped Spike, you know? Stone Cold did all the killing here. Now why don't you scatter along and find the rest of your kooky family?" Tazz said firmly, one hand on Bubba's chest, shrugging his shoulders. Bubba glared very harshly, and took a step towards him, but jerked his head away, and D – Von and he left.
Molly lifted her head up again to see Tazz and Michael Cole standing in front of her.
"Thank you," She said hoarsely. For not getting there in time?
//Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone//
Michael gave her a weak smile.
"Yeah, this is a funeral. It's like, holy neutral ground." Tazz said.
"Are you okay, Molly?" Michael asked, and he sounded worried.
Molly swallowed a lump in her throat. She was about to say yes again, as she had so many times in the past few days, but instead, she felt her mouth forming the word, 'no'.
//No love left in me
No eyes to see the heaven beside me
My time is yet to come
So I'll be forever yours//
All the tears that she had been holding back since she'd found out suddenly began streaming down her face. A sheet of glistening tears coated her eyes, and behind the tears, her eyes the purest pain. Molly tried to wipe them away, but they didn't stop, and soon her face was soaked. Michael pulled her into an awkward hug, patting her on the back.
She sobbed into his shoulder, wetting the grey suit.
//Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone//
Her mind suddenly drowned in a flood of memory. She could recall so many little moments, and together, they were what Spike meant to her.
Molly yawned softly and snuggled further into the chest pressed against her back. It was warm, and she didn't want to open her eyes.
"Molly," The soft voice whispered in her ear. She smiled, her eyes still shut.
"I can't hear you, I'm sleeping," She said, feigning exhaustion.
"Sleeping people don't respond when you talk to them," She knew Spike smiled over her shoulder. Molly was silent, and reveled in the feel of his hand resting on her arm.
The silence between them was not uncomfortable; in fact, it was the exact opposite. They were so happy, so calm there, that neither wanted to spoil it with words.
"Come on, Molls," He sounded serious now. "Sleeping Beauty, it's almost seven." He kissed her gently.
Molly sat up with a start, and half – fell out of bed, picking up articles of clothing randomly and dressing quickly. "Oh god. Crash and Bob will be at my room to check on me and make sure I'm there… I've got to get back before…"
Spike silenced her with a finger on her lips. "It's okay. I understand." And his smile was the most welcome thing Molly had ever seen.
"I'm sorry. I wish we could have a little more time together." Molly said, kissing his cheek.
"We will someday," Spike said, and hugged her tight one last time before she hurried out the door.
//No love left in me
No eyes to see the heaven beside me
My time is yet to come
So I'll be forever yours//
"I wish we could have a little more time together."
"We will someday."
The words rang like an aching bell in her ears, and her tears seemed suspended for a moment in time, as though her pain could stop the world. We never will.
Michael let her rest on his shoulder, trying to get away. "I know you've probably heard this a thousand times, but… I'm sorry that you had to go through this," Michael said softly. Closing her eyes, concentrating hard on the words, she could almost think that it was Spike saying the words to her.
"Spike was a good guy. I knew him pretty well, he was a good guy." Tazz offered. "It shouldn't have finished up like this."
"No," Molly whispered. "It shouldn't have."
//No love left in me No eyes to see the heaven beside me//"Molly, do you need a ride somewhere?" Michael asked.
Molly hesitated before answering. "Yes. My cousins left me here."
"Okay, where do you need to go? Tazz and I can take you home … home to the hotel, I mean. Or wherever you need to go." Michael said, stumbling over his own words.
Because of Spike's death, everything had been put on hold for a while. The entire WWF's touring schedule had stopped for one week so that everything could be sorted out. They were all stuck here until the end of the week, staying in the same hotel they had been in before. The arena had no bookings the entire week, and Vince was planning to do the show from the same place for Raw, since they couldn't get to the next scheduled arena overnight.
Molly almost didn't have the courage to say it. But she knew the idea wouldn't leave her alone until she finally did… "I want you to take me back to the arena."
//My time is yet to come So I'll be forever yours//
"Are you sure, I mean, that's going to be all emotional and stuff for you, right?" Tazz asked nervously.
"I'm sure,"
"Positive?" Cole asked.
Molly nodded. Tazz and Michael exchanged a look. "Let's go then," Michael finally said.
//Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone//
Molly first went to the locker room where Spike had gotten ready. She ran her hands over the shelves, over the chairs, over the walls, as though trying to preserve any memories she might have made of him here.
Michael and Tazz stood outside the room, waiting for her.
When she emerged, Tazz asked, "Ready to go?"
Molly didn't answer, but walked past him, out to the ring. She stood in the ring, crouching down and touching the mat, almost reverently. She sat like that, resting her fingers on the mat, for several minutes.
Then she stood, looking up at the ceiling, at the light, out at the crowd, at the ramp, at the announcer's table. At everything.
Michael and Tazz watched from a distance, wondering at her in confusion.
Molly leaned down again, stroking her fingers once against the mat. Then she collapsed in the middle of it, sobbing, a single tragic figure, tiny against the massiveness of the arena.
//whatever walks in my heart...//