Title: In the End
Author: Girl with Issues
E-Mail: Buffy38841@aol.com or AngieMcKendrick@aol.com
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Thou owes naught…*Sigheth*
Timeline: After "Rampage."
Summary: Dave goes too far in avenging the abused.
Song Used: "Crawling" by Linkin Park. Don't own this either…
Author's Notes: Don't ya look how I torture my poor Davie? Heehee. Ok…since it's been awhile since my last update, here's a recap of what happened in this story:
***Jing-Mei was late for a meeting and needed someone to cover her remaining shift. Dave, hoping to score some points, took Jing-Mei's cases, including a young boy who had been abused by his father. After a thorough check-up, Dave knew the boy had been abused. When Dave went to confront the father, things got heated and escalated until the men got into a fight. The boy ran to get help and returned with Kerry. Kerry took Dave into the lounge and told him of the hospital's "3 strikes and you're out" policy, and that he'd crossed the line this time. Kerry went to Romano and Dave was fired. Dave returned to the hospital a week later (because he was suspended for the fight) and found out about his being fired. After his shift, Dave was cleaning out his locker when Jing-Mei came to talk with him. After a few minutes, she left and Dave finished his locker and realized that his dream of being a doctor had been shattered.***
*~*
Chapter 6: The Walking Wounded
(Set about 3-4 weeks after Dave's suspension).
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Crawling in my skin/
These wounds they will not heal/
Fear is what I feel/
Confusing what is real-
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Dave started awake, causing the headphones that were attached to his ears to slip down into the folds of the rumpled bedsheets.
He paused for a yawn, before casting a bleary-eyed gaze around the cluttered bedroom.
Along with mounds of dirty laundry mixed in with clean, there was about a two-week buildup of mail, food dishes, and empty beer cans scattered about.
On the dusty nightstand, next to bed and in between a couple of beer cans, was an empty prescription bottle of sleeping pills. For about the first week or so after his suspension, Dave had been downing pot after pot of coffee and bottles of caffeine pills to stay awake. Finally, he'd wised up and allowed himself to succumb to those…
"Damn nightmares," Dave muttered, yanking the headphones from the covers, pulling them from the CD player, allowing the sounds of Linkin Park to be blasted throughout the small apartment.
Turning the volume down, Dave again curled up, pulling the sheets up around himself. He guessed that he'd fallen asleep while listening to music, one of the only things he still enjoyed doing these days.
For a couple moments, Dave laid in bed, letting the music wash over him, really listening to the lyrics.
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There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface/
Consuming, confusing/
This lack of self-control I fear is never-ending/
Controlling and I can't seem/
To find myself again/
My walls are closing in/
Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced/
That there's just too much pressure to take/
I've felt this way before/
So insecure.
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As he listened, Dave's mind began to wander. He thought about Shelly, James, Dan, and their cases. When he thought about Shelly, he remembered what he told Carter (when Carter asked if Shelly would be alright): "Her cuts will heal." He thought about the call he'd received from Shelly's mother, a couple weeks later.
Shelly was living with the mother now, and her cuts did heal. Dave knew, however, that the emotional "cuts" would stay with her for awhile, most likely, forever.
Dave then remembered what he'd told James, when James was begging Dave not to call his father, that Dave didn't know his father: "It's true, I don't know your father, but I know the type." Of course he knew the TYPE; Dave had lived with the TYPE for several long, painful years.
He pushed this from his mind. It was over. Done, finito, kaput. Dave was adult, he had his own life now.
Not much of one, he observed wryly, again glancing about the room. Whatever…I'm fine as I am.
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Crawling in my skin/
These wounds they will not heal/
Fear is what I feel/
Confusing what is real/
Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me/
Distracting, reacting/
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection/
It's haunting, how I can't seem…
To find myself again/
My walls are closing in/
Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced/
That there's just too much pressure to take/
I've felt this way before/
So insecure.
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I'm fine as I am…
Dave wondered why that sounded so much better just swirling around in his head. Because his heart was telling him different…
With an annoyed groan, Dave yanked the covers back over his head and attempted to go back to sleep.
The loud buzz from the doorbell prevented him from doing this.
*~*
A/N: Yay! Fanfiction.net's back! Woohoo! Finally! Ahem…I'm ok now. 2 more chapters to go…then…THE SEQUEL! Yup…I'm continuing Dave's angsty saga. Hope you'll read. I'm off to dash off Chapter 7 now. As for you…Review this chapter for me. Thanks!