Me Myself & B'Elanna

by VoyagerCat

"Lieutenant!" "I no, airlock city for me."

1. Default Chapter

"Me Myself & B'Elanna"

By VoyagerCat

Chapter 1

Disclaimer --- God created man.  Man created Start Trek Voyager.  I created life for the characters.  Rated PG13 Ó2001

"Mr. Kim, if you don't tell me the Naballan have retreated, I'm going to demote you to crewman."  Kathryn Janeway pulled a strand of hair out of her face and tried unsuccessfully to smooth it behind her ear.

"I suppose I get to be Ensign for a little longer then Captain.  The Naballan have retreated."

"Thanks Harry.  Since you are to remain my best Ensign for a while, I suggest you change your uniform.  You look like hell."  She could barely hold back the laugh in her throat.  It had been well needed for the crew the last few days.  Tensions were high, and tempers were beginning to flare.

"You don't look so sharp yourself Captain.  I doubt commander Chakotay would want to sit next to you smelling like that."  Harry burst out laughing along with the captain and what little crew was on the bridge.

"Damage report, Mr. Tuvok."  Janeway took her seat and looked at the empty chair sitting next to her.  I hope they come back soon, I never realized how quiet it is around here without my first officer and my best pilot.

 Janeway had been so lost in her own thoughts she almost missed Tuvok's entire report.

 "All decks have reported in.  Minor injuries reported and a ruptured plasma conduit on deck 11.  Lutenient Torres is on her way to fix it."  Tuvok stated in his usual composed manner.

"I hope that's the last we see of the Naballan.  Tuvok, continue at yellow alert, we don't need any more surprises."

"Aye Captain."  Tuvok could see the strain on his captain's face.  She never seemed to get enough sleep especially when there was some of her crew away from the ship.  He thought about talking to her about it, but he knew it would be a moot conversation.  Until the away team was back safe and sound on Voyager, she wouldn't relax.

"Maintain course we don't want to be too far off the mark when we rendezvous with the Flyer tomorrow.  I'll be in my ready room."

***

How do I always have so many damn reports to look over?  If Chakotay were here, at least I could pawn some of them off on him.  Janeway's thought of her first officer brought a slight smile back to her face. He'd been gone over two weeks and while she'd never admit it to anyone else, she missed him terribly.  Things always seemed to get even crazier when one of the command team was away from the ship.  In this case, they had been under constant attack from the pesky little Naballan.  They were not really much of a threat, but just enough of an annoyance to give Janeway a two-week headache.  Just twelve more hours and they could leave this area of space for good. 

"Seven to the Captain."

Taking a deep sight, Janeway answered the hail.  "What can I do for you Seven?"

"It is past the time for our weekly Velocity game.  Has it been rescheduled?"

"I'm sorry Seven, I just forgot, I'll meet you in a few minutes."  At first, she thought to cancel the game, but then she looked at all the reports in front of her and decided that Velocity had a much better appeal than a bunch of stupid reports that Starfleet would probably never see anyway.  Besides, I think I'll just save them for Chakotay, it's his turn not mine.  With a smile firmly in place, she left the ready room and headed for holo-deck two.

***

"Captain, you must be distracted today, I've scored the last four points and you haven't commented on it.  Is everything alright?"

"Everything's fine Seven, maybe I was just being nice and letting you get ahead.  I wouldn't want an unhappy ex Borg running around my ship.  That could be dangerous."  Janeway had just scored two points while distracting Seven's attention.  She had known exactly what she was doing.

"You are cheating Captain.  Distracting your opponent is not the fair way to gain points."  Janeway took a flying dive and blasted the disk before it smashed into the side of her head.  Jumping to her feet, she got off another shot that tied the score.

"It worked didn't it?  Besides, it's not my fault you are so easily distracted."  They both went after the last shot when Janeway's com-badge interrupted them with the Doctor's hail.  Seven got the last shot and won the game. 

"You are easily distracted Captain."  Seven had a smirk plastered on her face.

Janeway was laughing as she answered the hail.  "What is it Doctor?"

"I need you to come to sickbay immediately."  All smiles were gone as she felt a sense of panic creep into her.

"What's happened Doctor?"  She was already headed for the door with Seven, right behind her.

"Lieutenant Torres has been injured."

"How bad is it?"

"I'll explain when you get here, just hurry."  Dread washed through her at the tone of the Doctor's voice.  He rarely sounded so concerned.  Janeway and Seven ran the rest of the way to sickbay.  Janeway didn't slow down until she bolted through the doors and skidded to a halt at the sight of her chief engineer.  She had to fight back the churning in her stomach.

"What happened?"  Her voice was just above a whisper as she slowly made her way to the bio-bed where what was left of B'Elanna lay perfectly still, barely breathing.

"She was working on a ruptured conduit with Lieutenant Vorik when it exploded."  Janeway hadn't noticed that there was someone else on the next bio-bed.  She turned her panic stricken expression toward the Doctor, mostly to avert her gaze from the charred body in front of her.  "Lieutenant Vorik will be fine.  B'Elanna took the worst of the blast trying to push him out of the way.  She has third-degree plasma burns over 90% of her body.  Her lungs have been burned so badly, I don't know how she's even breathing at all.

Janeway's eyes filled with tears as she looked at her chief engineer and dear friend.  Her body was charred and black, the flesh had burned right through to the bone on her legs and arms.  The ridges on her forehead were no longer visible, and her hair had been burned off, leaving just a few short strands behind her ears.  The churning in her stomach intensified with the smell of cooked flesh and metal.  Janeway had to put her hand over her mouth to fight back the overwhelming nausea.  Seven had put her arm around her captain and helped her away from the horrific sight.  She gratefully sat down and took the glass of water the Doctor had brought.  After taking a few gulps, she managed to swallow the lump in her throat.

"Can you save her Doctor?"

"I don't know Captain.  I can repair most of the damage to her burnt flesh, but her lungs can't hold enough air to keep her alive.  From all medical aspects, her body is dead." 

How will I ever be able to explain to Tom when he gets back that I let his wife die?  This just can't be happening.  "Doctor, we cannot let her die, I won't except that.  After all the disasters we've managed to get through, a ruptured conduit isn't going to take the life of my chief engineer and friend.  You have to do something."  Janeway was on the verge of hysteria at that point.  The Doctor didn't miss the panic in her eyes.  He had one option, but it was very farfetched and he wasn't sure he should even mention it, but at the same time, how could he not.  The loss of Lieutenant Torres would be devastating to a lot of people on the ship, him included.

"Seven, would you excuse us, I need to talk to the Captain in private?"

"Of course Doctor.  Captain, if you require my assistance, I'll be in engineering."  Janeway just acknowledged Seven with a nod.

"Ok Doctor, what's you plan and how risky is it?"

"I'll be honest Captain, it's very risky and I don't know what chance it will even have of working."

"Any chance at all is worth trying Doctor, I won't let her die."

"You don't always have a choice Captain.  I think you better hear me out first, death may be the best option."

"I told you, that is NOT an option."  Janeway got up and started pacing.  Her nerves were frayed and her heart was breaking.

"Do you remember when my Vidian friend Denara Pel was onboard and I transferred her consciousness, or in her case her synaptic patterns into a holographic image of herself?"

"Of course I remember.  Are you saying you can do the same with B'Elanna until you can heal her body?"

"Yes and no.  I could transfer her conscious mind, but not into a holographic image.  Lieutenant Torres's condition is much worse than Denara's ever was.  Besides, it wouldn't work the same way.  B'Elanna's half Klingon makes the outcome a bit different."

"Then just what are you saying Doctor?  Her consciousness, or synaptic patterns, or whatever the hell you want to call it, have to be put somewhere.  If not a holo-image, then where?"  The moment she said it, she knew the answer before it came out of his mouth.

"Another living being."

"Is that possible?  How could two minds co-exist in the same body?"

"It has been done before, but not under these circumstances and not with a half Klingon. It might not even work at all and it could harm the other person as well, even kill them.  Captain, this is a long shot at best and we don't even have another Klingon onboard. I don't know if there is even another person who could or would be compatible."  Without hesitation, Janeway knew she would do it if at all possible.

"Well, I can take care of the who could, now you just need to make sure it works Doctor."

"Captain, you can't be serious.  This ship and crew need their captain.  I'm not willing to risk the life of the captain of this ship to save the chief engineer."

"It's my life to risk Doctor.  I'm not about to sit here and watch B'Elanna die if there is even the slightest chance that I can do something to help her."

"It doesn't have to be you Captain, we can find someone else to do this."

"There is no one else and you know that.  I'm just as pigheaded as B'Elanna so I'm sure I know what I'll be up against.  Besides, I'm the captain it's my responsibility to protect the crew and if that means giving my life to save one of them, that's just what I'll do."  It was the Doctor who was pacing now.  He couldn't have looked or felt more frustrated if he'd been a living, breathing person instead of a hologram.

"You are right about one thing Captain, you are pigheaded, but that pigheadedness could get you killed."

"Maybe, but it could also save B'Elanna's life and I think that's worth the risk."

"If this works and you both survive, I hope B'Elanna will realize what a sacrifice her captain is making."  Janeway put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a wink.

"Don't worry Doctor, I won't let her forget.  Now, let's get on with it."

"I'm going to need about an hour to get things set up and to get B'Elanna ready for the transfer."  He still looked too unhappy about the whole thing.  Janeway felt sorry for him.  If this didn't work and they both ended up dead, he'd never forgive himself and would probably shut down his program.  Janeway tried a bit of humor to ease the situation.

"Look at it this way Doctor, if this doesn't work the ship will be a lot more quiet."

"Not funny Captain and even worse than that, I'd have to live with Commander Chakotay and Mr. Paris."

"Ouch!  That could be tough.  I guess we'd better make sure this works then.  I'll be back in less then twenty minutes.  I'd better turn the ship over to Tuvok and let him know the situation."  She was already heading for the door.

"Maybe his logic can talk you out of this."

"Not a chance."  Janeway called back to him as she left sickbay. 

Pigheaded woman.  He mumbled under his breath as he set about getting things ready for the hardest procedure he'd ever done yet.  If this worked, he'd be the most sought after Doctor in Starfleet, well once they made it back home that is.

***

"Are you ready Captain?"  The Doctor had explained everything he could think of and had given Janeway a sedative to relax her.  She was lying on the bio-bed next to B'Elanna's.  The Doctor had already put B'Elanna in a stasis field.  Janeway closed her eyes fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill.  She was a lot more nervous than she'd ever admit to anyone.  She didn't regret what she was about to do, just that she had to face this without her friend and first officer.  If it didn't work, she'd never see him again and that's what frightened her the most.  She hadn't noticed the Doctor had taken her hand.  "We don't have to go through with this Captain."

"Yes we do Doctor."  She gave his hand a squeeze in return.  "I trust you, now get on it."

"Aye Captain."  He managed a slight smile for both their sakes.  "Remember Captain when you wake up your mind will be in for a shock and B'Elanna will have no idea what has happened.  It will be total chaos at first, worse than a Borg assimilation."

"Goodie, I can feel the headache already."  The Doctor put a hypo to her neck.  Janeway's eyes drifted closed.

"That will be the least of your problems Captain."  That was the last thing she heard as her mind drifted into unconsciousness.

Two Hours Later

This time the hypo that the Doctor put to Janeway's neck was to wake her up.  She slowly opened one eye then the other, trying to clear the fogginess from her mind.  It took a few more moments for her to remember where she was and what had just happened.  She didn't feel any different and a sense of panic shot through her.  She bolted up to a sitting position, letting the sheet fall half-way from her small frame.

"Captain, calm down, it's ok."

"B'Elanna!  Where's B'Elanna, I can't hear her."  Before the Doctor could answer, Janeway felt a sudden jolt of pain shoot through her head causing a tingling sensation throughout her entire body.  "Doctor!"

"Take it easy Captain, just breath deeply and let it happen.  B'Elanna is just trying to wake up.  I told you it was going to be a shock for you, not to mention the shock it will be for Lieutenant Torres."  Janeway closed her eyes again trying to control the strange feeling rushing through her.  She had a sudden sense of claustrophobia and she opened her mouth to say something, but it wasn't her words that came out.  It was her voice just not her words.

"HEY, THESE AREN'T MY BOOBS!"

"No, they're mine."  Janeway pulled the sheet up around her trying to glare at the Doctor, but finding it difficult to take control over the slightest movement.

"What the hell is going on?  Where am I, who am I?"  It was Janeway's voice in a total panic, but the words were coming from B'Elanna.  The Doctor was having a hard time keeping a straight face.  The whole scene was quite comical.

"Doctor, say something!  I don't know how to explain this."

"I'm not sure how to either Captain."

"Well one of you better tell me what the hell is going on.  Gods, my head is killing me."

"It's not your head, it's mine and yes it's killing me.  Doctor, can't you give me something for the headache?"

"I'm afraid not Captain, B'Elanna."  The Doctor suddenly started laughing, he couldn't help it.  The Captain, or rather B'Elanna was inspecting her body, the room, everything.  He knew that B'Elanna was totally confused and that the captain was about to choke him, but he just couldn't help laughing at them both.

"DOCTOR!"  He wasn't sure which one had said it, but he stopped laughing immediately and tried to take control of the situation.

"Both of you need to calm down."

"Calm down!  I feel like I'm back on the barge of the dead."  That thought put a shock to B'Elanna's mind.  She almost had herself convinced that she really was dead until she heard Janeway's voice in her mind.

B'Elanna, please relax.  You're not dead, well not exactly.  Janeway's body slumped back on the bio-bed.  It was a very unsettling feeling for Janeway to not have control over what her body was doing.  "B'Elanna, would you stop doing that?"

"Doing what?  Doctor, please help me, I've gone mad."

"Not quite Lieutenant.  Just lie still, both of you and I'll try to explain."  Janeway's eyes closed and this time it was her, doing so.  "B'Elanna, you were in an accident.  Do you remember any of it?"

"I was working with Vorik on the ruptured conduit and it was about to explode.  I remember trying to push him out of the way, but that's all I remember."

"You did manage to get him clear of the worst of the blast, but you weren't so lucky.  Your body and lungs were damaged severely."

"I don't like the sound of this Doctor."  B'Elanna started to move Janeway's body off the bio-bed but stopped suddenly at the sight next to her.  Janeway's eyes had focused on the charred body next to her.

"B'Elanna!  Don't look, just close my eyes and let us explain."  The Doctor caught Janeway as her body staggered toward him.  He helped her back onto the bio-bed and placed another hypo to her neck.  "Doctor, what's happened?  I can't feel her anymore."

"I think she's just passed out from the shock of seeing her own body.  The sedative should help both of you relax."

"Doctor, this is a bit more difficult than I thought it would be.  Are you sure she's going to be alright?"

"I'm not sure of anything at this point Captain.  It's not like I do this everyday."

"Well it's a first for me too."

Tom, Tom where are you?  Tom.

"I think she's coming around again Doctor."

"How do you know?"  Just then, Janeway let out a blood-curdling scream that filled sickbay and echoed throughout the ship.  The shocking scream coming from her own voice made Janeway's head pound and her heart race.  "B'Elanna, please calm down and I'll explain.  You're going to cause both you and the captain more pain if you don't relax."  The Doctor had to physically restrain her by holding her down on the bio-bed.

B'Elanna please, you're hurting me.  You have to calm down or we're both going to die.  Slowly Janeway's body stopped thrashing against the Doctor and her breathing returned back to normal.

"Lieutenant, I can fix the damage to your body, but not while you are in it.  Your body couldn't sustain your life but you conscious mind or synaptic patterns were in-tact.  This was the only way to try and save your life."

"Just what is this Doctor?  You can't possibly be saying what I think you're saying."

"That's exactly what I'm saying Lieutenant.  You are in the captain's body, and if not for her, you would be on that barge of dead, for good."

"This is impossible."

"Maybe, but the impossible has happened and we need to work together to get through this.  I couldn't just let you die B'Elanna."

"Why not, I don't think I can live in this body.  It just doesn't feel right."

"Well it's no picnic for me either Lieutenant.  You're just going to have to deal with it, and stop trying to take over, it's my body and I'll tell it what to do, understood?"

"Oh, so I'm just supposed to float around in your head and not do anything."

"Exactly, I'm the captain."

"Well for the moment, so am I."  B'Elanna, in Janeway's voice busted out laughing which caused the Doctor to do the same.  Watching a conversation between two people going on, but only seeing one person was very amusing.  If anyone would have come in to sickbay and witnessed the scene, they would have thought their captain had gone mad.

Damnit B'Elanna, stop laughing so I can say something.

Sorry.  Suddenly, the Doctor found he was the only one laughing.  He received the death glare, which he had no doubt was from the captain.  You just gave him the death glare didn't you?  This might be fun after all.

Don't count on it Lieutenant.  I'm already regretting saving your butt.  This old body isn't big enough for both of us and I was here first.

Old and scrawny.

Oh, that's it.  "Doctor, I changed my mind.  Get her out of me now!"

"Sorry Captain, you volunteered to do this, now you'll just have to learn to live with Lieutenant Torres and her many fine attributes."

"I hope you meant that as a compliment Doctor."

"Of course Lieutenant."  B'Elanna and the Doctor both started laughing again.  Janeway's headache was intensifying.

"Would you two shut the hell up so I can think."  Janeway put her hands over her eyes, hoping to block out reality.

"Hey, don't cover my eyes I can't see."

"They're my eyes and I'll cover them up if I want."

"Doctor, get me out of here.  I don't think I'll survive inside the captain.  She's too pigheaded to share."

"I'm pigheaded am I?  You're right Doctor, we should have just let her die.  I make the ultimate sacrifice and this is what I get for it.  What was I thinking?"

"As I recall Captain, you were thinking about how much B'Elanna means to you and everyone on this ship.  You were thinking that her life was more important than yours and you would do anything to save her."

Kathryn, you really said that about me?

No, it must have been some other captain of Voyager.

I'm really touched; I don't know what to say.

Good, then be quiet for a few minutes so we can figure this out.

Yes Ma'am.

"Are you going to say something Captain, or Lieutenant?"

"Sorry Doctor, we forgot you were even here."

"This is going to be an interesting forty eight hours to say the least.  I'm glad I'll be stuck in sickbay working my magic on Lieutenant Torres's body so I won't have to deal with either one of you."

"Come on Captain, let's get out of here and leave Mr. Magic to his work.  I want my body to be as good as new when he's done with it."  B'Elanna slid off the bio-bed and started for the door.

"B'Elanna, stop!  I'm not even, I mean we're not even dressed."  B'Elanna stopped Janeway's legs and started to laugh again.

"I guess it would be quite a shock for the crew to see this scrawny old body roaming the ship with no clothes on."

"Oh, you are really pushing it my friend.  I'm not old or scrawny.  Show us a little respect would ya?  The Delta Quadrant has taken its tole on me, not to mention what you're doing to me."  Janeway had taken control of her body and headed back in to get dressed.

I'll say it's taken a tole on you.  Your boobs are a hell of a lot saggier than mine.  At least B'Elanna had the good sense to make that comment silently.  Janeway started laughing again and the Doctor had no way of knowing why, or who it was that was laughing.  His better judgment once again saved him from commenting.

Janeway dressed quickly and headed again for the door to sickbay.  "One good thing about this, I get to hang out in the captain's uniform for the next forty eight hours."  Janeway stopped suddenly and turned back to the Doctor.

"Thirty six hours Doctor, not a minute longer.  That's an order."  They walked out the door missing the Doctor's comment, which was just as well.

***

"Did you see the look on Neelix's face as we marched by?"

"Of course I saw it, they're my eyes, remember?  He probably thinks I've finally lost my mind.  I'm sure within a few minutes the whole ship will have been informed of my insanity."  They had managed to make it back to Janeway's quarters without killing each other in the process. 

"One thing's for sure, we're going to have to compromise on who has control over what part of your body.  We can't keep walking the halls of the ship saying left, right, left.  Hell, I'm living in you and I think you're crazy."

"When did you become such a comedian Lieutenant?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe about an hour ago.  How else am I supposed to deal with this crazy situation?  My body is dead, I'm living inside my captain, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it but laugh.  The whole thing is too bizarre to do anything else."

"I agree with you on that one.  This is by far the most bizarre thing that's happened yet on this ship.  I didn't think I could still be surprised, how wrong I was."

"Kathryn, I don't think I'll ever be able to thank you for doing this.  No one else, I mean no one has ever cared enough about me to…"

"You have a lot more friends on this ship than you think B'Elanna, and don't start crying, I don't want my eyes all red and puffy.  Besides, I happen to know a pilot on this ship who is madly in love with you."

"Yea, Tom is the best thing that's ever happened to me, well besides hanging out inside the captain that is."

"Don't start B'Elanna, I may love you, but this is a bit too close for comfort."  This time they both started laughing.  "Ok, enough of this, I need a shower."

"I'll say, you, I mean we stink.  What were you doing before I invaded your body, playing Velocity with Seven?"  Janeway had walked into her bathroom, shedding her clothes in the process.

"That's just what I was doing.  Now, if you don't want to watch this stinky old scrawny body, take a shower, then I suggest you take a nap or something cause we're going in."

"I suppose I can handle it, I've seen worse. One time when Tom and I were…"

"B'Elanna!  I don't think my stomach can take it.  Don't think it, don't say it."

"OK, ok, but speaking of stomachs, I'm starving, or you're starving.  Can we eat after we shower?"

"B'Elanna, you're impossible."

"I've been told that before."  The laughter continued as the two, or the one took a nice hot shower.

***

"Captain, I don't know how you do it."

"Just what are you talking about Lieutenant?"

"How do you get any sleep with the way you snore?  I've never heard anything like it."

"B'Elanna, I do not snore and for your information, that wasn't me making all that damn noise, it was you snoring.  I hardly got any sleep at all."

"Sorry Captain, but it was you and I can prove it."

"No you can't because I don't snore."  Janeway was already on her second cup of coffee and she'd only been up for fifteen minutes.

"It's your body Captain, so that horrific noise came out of you.  I'm just a visitor."  B'Elanna received a few colorful words through Janeway's thoughts.  "Hey, don't call me that.  Gees Captain, I didn't even know you knew such language, and it was too you that snored all night."  Janeway didn't bother to respond, she just kept sipping on her coffee.  "How can you drink so much of that stuff?  It taste worse than rotten ground-up Leolaroot.  Can't you at least put some sugar and cream in it?"

"No, I like it black thank you.  If you don't like it, then don't taste it."

"What great advice from our intrepid captain.  Wish I'd have thought of it."

"B'Elanna, would you shut up?  I like a bit of peace and quiet first thing in the mornings and you are neither peaceful, or quiet."

"Well excuse me!  I usually have someone much more pleasant to talk to in the mornings.  What a grouch!"

"I am not a grouch.  Now are you ready to go and face the day?"

"Yes, I won't forget what you told me.  Keep my mouth shut, no strange movements and you are the captain.  Does that about cover it?"

"I'm glad to see you were paying attention Lieutenant."  Janeway put her coffee cup down, and they headed for the door.

"You are too a grouch, and you snore."  Unfortunately, B'Elanna had made that comment aloud just as they entered the corridor and three crewmen were passing by.  The three just gave Janeway a strange look, but didn't dare stop to ask who, or what she was talking to.  B'Elanna was doing everything in her power not to laugh, but it was impossible.  She busted out laughing in Janeway's voice causing the three crewmen to turn back around and glare at Janeway.  B'Elanna received another round of profanity through Janeway's thoughts.  Poor B'Elanna was trying so hard to control her laughter that the tears were pooling in Janeway's eyes.

"Captain, is everything alright?"  One of the crewmen got up the nerve to ask.

"Yes, I'm just fine, thank you.  You'd better get going before you're late for duty."

"Yes Ma'am."  They all three turned and hurried toward the turbo-lift."

B'Elanna, you are about to find you consciousness or synaptic patterns or whatever the hell you are right now floating in space.  Not one more word, understood?

Aye Captain, sorry.

Hell, my head hurts.  You are by far the biggest headache of my life.  Maybe the Doctor can give me something.  We're gong to sickbay first.  B'Elanna just kept quiet as she was told.  Janeway was grateful for the silence.

***

"Captain, Lieutenant, how are you feeling this morning?"

"How do you think I'm feeling?  I've got the worst headache known to man and a half Klingon that won't shut up."  Janeway had hopped up on the bio-bed as the Doctor ran his tricorder over her.

"Everything seams to be doing good Captain.  All your vital signs are normal.  How are you feeling Lieutenant?"  He didn't receive an answer.  "Hello, B'Elanna, are you in there?"

B'Elanna, answer him.

I can't, you said I couldn't say a word.  The Doctor started to look worried.

"Captain, what's happened?  Is she alright?"

"She's fine Doctor, for now.  She's just being a baby."

"I am not!  You just don't know how to have fun and you drink too much coffee.  My stomach hurts."

"Glad to hear you're alive Lieutenant.  You had me worried for a minute."  The Doctor put a hypospray to Janeway's neck.  "This should help your stomach Lieutenant.  Captain, you really do drink too much of that poison."  Janeway just rolled her eyes at the EMH.

"Would both of you just back off please?  Doctor, how much longer until B'Elanna's body is finished?  I don't think I can take this much longer."

"At least another twenty-four hours Captain.  It's not that easy to reconstruct all of her burnt skin.  I'm working as fast as I can."  Janeway suddenly felt a sense of panic coming from B'Elanna.  The sight of seeing her body lying on the bio-bed in such a state must have been horrible.

"Oh B'Elanna, I'm sorry.  I don't mean to be such a grouch, I can't imagine how hard this has been on you."

"It's not your fault Captain.  It's just so hard seeing myself like that, and yet it's not me.  This whole thing is just too weird to believe."

"We'll get through this, we just have to hang in a bit longer."  Once again, the Doctor found it fascinating watching the conversation between two people in one body.  He couldn't wait to start work on his report for the bigwigs at Starfleet medical.  This would be the most talked about case for century's to come.

"Doctor, can we go now, my stomach is feeling better."

"You mean my stomach, and it was just fine before, you just complain too much."

"Now, don't start, either one of you.  Yes you can go, just stay in touch and don't kill each other."

"Doctor, I'll do my best."  Janeway and B'Elanna walked as one out of sickbay.

***

Now remember B'Elanna, be good and keep quiet.

Yes Ma'am.  The doors to the turbo-lift opened and Janeway took a deep breath and stepped out.

"Good morning Captain."

"Ensign Kim."  Janeway gave him a slight nod as she walked down to her command chair.  "Anything to report Ensign?"

"All quiet Captain.  No sign of our friends.  All systems are running smoothly.  The Delta Flyer has reported in and they'll be in range in less than twelve hours."

"Yes!"  B'Elanna was so excited she forgot where she was and who she was.  Janeway found herself on her feet and running toward Harry.

B'Elanna, stop!  Janeway skidded to a stop just before reaching Harry, who was looking a bit shocked at his captain's actions.

"Captain, are you alright?"  Harry wasn't sure what else to say.

"I'm just fine Ensign.  I'm just glad they will be back soon."  Janeway slowly turned back toward her chair trying to save what little dignity she had left.  Just as she sat down, she let out the loudest, most disgusting belch she had ever heard.  It echoed off the bulkheads of the ship.

B'Elanna!  You are dead.

It's not my fault it was the coffee.  I told you not to drink so much. 

"Good one Captain.  That was even better than one of B'Elanna's."  Harry just couldn't help it, he was laughing so hard he was doubled over at his station.  Little did he know how accurate he was.  B'Elanna tried not to, she really did, but she busted out laughing along with everyone who was on the bridge to witness their captain at her best.  There was nothing Janeway could do but go along for the ride.

B'Elanna, you are going to pay big time for this.  Janeway managed to get control of her legs enough to stagger toward the ready room.  She didn't even bother to try and speak through all the laughter.  She just left the bridge not turning it over to anyone, not that there was a sane person left on the bridge to turn command over to anyway.

"B'Elanna, what in the hell are you trying to do to me.  You've managed in the last twelve hours to cause this entire crew to lose all respect for their captain."

"They haven't lost respect for you Captain, if anything they will love you even more for being just like everyone else."

"B'Elanna, that's one thing you are not.  You are in a class all your own, unfortunately now I'm stuck in that class with you.  I'll never be able to even look at Harry again without wondering what he's thinking about me."  Janeway headed for the replicator.  "Coffee, black."

"Kathryn, you better not drink that unless you want a repeat performance of that belch."  Janeway stopped just before the cup was at her lips.

"You wouldn't dare."

"I don't think you want to find out Captain.  How about some nice cold water instead?"

"Fine, you win, but you'd better think of a way to apologize to Harry, and everyone else on the ship."

"Well I don't know about everyone, but you could promote Harry to Lieutenant, that should make him happy."

"Oh I have a better idea.  Why don't I just promote him to chief engineer, I have it on good authority that the job will be open soon."  B'Elanna, and Janeway started laughing.

"Good one Captain, see you can be funny."

"Who's joking Lieutenant?  Now, see that very large pile of reports on my desk?"

"Of course I see them, they're your eyes, remember."

"Well, this is one instance where two heads are better than one."

"Are you nuts!  I hate reports."

"Too bad, and yes I am nuts or I wouldn't be in this mess in the first place.  Now get on it, that's an order Lieutenant."

"Yes Ma'am."  What a bunch of stupid Starfleet bullshit reports.

"I heard that Lieutenant."

"Sorry, I must have forgot my mind, or rather where my mind is."

"Apology accepted, now be quiet and get busy."

***

"Ensign Kim, is the Captain in her ready room?"

"Yea Seven she's in there, but she's been acting a little strange this morning.  I don't think she's feeling herself today."

"I am well aware of who she's feeling like Ensign.  I'll just go and make sure she's alright."  Without another word, Seven headed for the ready room, leaving Harry even more puzzled than he'd been before.  Commander Tuvok didn't bother to elaborate on the situation either.

"Captain, Lieutenant, I have the latest Astrometrics report."

"Goodie, that's all we need is another damn report."

"Captain?"

"Sorry Seven.  B'Elanna, be quiet.  Let's see the report."  Seven handed the Captain the Padd.

"According to our scans of the entire region, the Naballan have gone for good.  There is no sign of them within our long range sensors."  Janeway was rubbing at her throbbing head.

"Well at least that's some good news.  Is there anything else?"

"No Captain, but can I say you don't look too good."

"You just said it, so I guess so."

"Gee Seven, you are so kind.  Don't you ever have anything nice to say?"

"B'Elanna, stay out of it."

"I do feel sorry for you Captain.  Even millions of Borg voices in your head would be better than one Klingon."  Janeway was smiling, but B'Elanna was growling.

"Just what the hell is that supposed to mean you Borg bit…"

"B'Elanna!  That's enough, both of you."  Janeway shot Seven the death glare, which didn't faze her in the least.

"I think it was self explanatory Lieutenant.  Even if I were still a Borg, I wouldn't want to assimilate you because I wouldn't want you in my head."  Before Janeway could react, B'Elanna had leaped over the desk in full Klingon rage ready to strangle Seven.

"B'Elanna!  Stop!"  Seven had managed to duck out of the way, which caused Janeway to hit the deck of the ready room.  Janeway let out a groan, rolling over and putting her hands over her aching head.

"Seven to the Doctor, emergency in the captain's ready room.  I think Lieutenant Torres has driven the captain mad."

"I'll be right there."  A few seconds later, the Doctor materialized in the ready room.  He was instantly on his knees putting a hypo to the captain's neck.  "Captain, can you hear me, are you alright?"

"Yes I can hear you Doctor, and no I'm not alright."  The Doctor was running his medical-tricorder over her.

"It doesn't appear that anything's broken Captain.  What's been going on in here?"

"Don't ask me, why don't you ask my Klingon half and her Borg friend?  I'm just the lucky recipient of their fun and games."

"Lieutenant, care to explain?"  The Doctor wasn't happy with this new situation.  He was trying to do his best to save B'Elanna's life and didn't have time to play this game.

"No, my head hurts."

"It's my head that hurts, no thanks to you Lieutenant."

"Hey, don't blame this one on me, your Borg friend started it."

"I was only speaking the truth Lieutenant, just like Captain Janeway has always taught me."

"Seven!"  They all three said at once.  It was the Doctor who finished.

"Seven, I think you'd better leave, you're not helping the situation at all."  Seven turned on her heels and left the ready room without another word.  The Doctor helped Janeway to her feet and over to the couch.  "Is your head feeling any better now?"

"Yes, but I'm feeling a bit dizzy."

"That's just an effect from the medication.  You're going to be groggy for a few hours, which is probably for the best.  Why don't you just lie here and get a few hours of rest.  I'll inform Commander Tuvok not to disturb you."

"Thanks Doctor, but what happened to B'Elanna, I can't hear her anymore?"

"I'm sure she's already asleep.  The medication works rather quickly Captain."  Janeway didn't respond as she had fallen asleep also.  The Doctor just smiled to himself as he put a blanket over them and left the ready room in silence.

***

Captain, wake up.  Captain, we have to go, wakeup.

B'Elanna, go away, I'm sleeping.  Janeway rolled over on the couch in her ready room, hoping to ignore the other voice in her head.

I can't go away, I'm stuck in here and we have to go, now!  I can't move your body without your help.  Now get up.

No, I don't have to go anywhere, just a few more minutes of sleep, now be quiet.

Fine, just pee your paints.  You thought the belch was embarrassing wait till you walk out of here in wet paints.

Oh for hell sakes, I don't have to go that bad.

Yes you do, now get up.  You shouldn't have drank all that coffee.  Janeway's body started moving without her say so.

"Fine!"  Janeway screamed out.  She made her way to bathroom and wisely enough B'Elanna kept quiet.  A few minutes later Janeway was back at the replicator ordering more coffee.  "Feel better now Lieutenant?"  She started to sip on her life saving liquid.

"Well I did until you started drinking that crap again.  You really are impossible to live with Captain."

"If you don't like the living arrangements, get out."

"I wish I could, I hate this whole thing.  I feel so, not me.  I miss Tom."  Janeway could feel her eyes start to tear up.

"B'Elanna, don't cry.  It won't be much longer and Tom will be back in just a few hours.  Besides, according to Seven, I already look like hell so I don't need red-puffy eyes to make me look even worse."

"I'm not crying, and Seven is a pig."

"Don't start with Seven, and if you weren't crying, why am I wiping my eyes?"

"They're your eyes, don't ask me, maybe you have allergies."

"That must be it.  Come on let's go get some lunch to go with this coffee.  That should make you feel better."

"I'm right behind you, or rather a bit closer."  Janeway was laughing as she left the ready room.  Tuvok just gave her a nod as she passed by his tactical station.  Janeway stopped before she reached the turbo-lift.

"Tuvok, we'll be in the mess hall if you need me.  B'Elanna's hungry again."

"I'm glad to see you have to eat Captain.  Maybe having a companion with you is a good thing."  Janeway just rolled her eyes as she entered the lift.  B'Elanna was laughing.

"Don't start, either one of you."  The doors closed just as Tuvok was about to protest.  B'Elanna was still laughing.

"See, I told you, you are too scrawny."

"I think your exact words were, old and scrawny."

"My mistake Captain."

***

It was quite late in the afternoon so most of the crew had already eaten lunch and it was still too early for dinner.  Janeway was grateful for the sparse amount of people in the mess hall.  She had chosen a table over by the view-port and B'Elanna had about three times too much food heaped in front of them.  "B'Elanna, there's no way I'll ever be able to eat all of this.  It's still my stomach even if it's your appetite."

"Don't worry, I'll stop when we're full."  Before Janeway could comment, B'Elanna shoved a big fork full of food into their mouth.

You're the pig Lieutenant.

Yup.  They just kept eating and didn't notice Harry walking over to them.

"Captain, may I join you?"

B'Elanna, keep you mouth shut.  "Sure Harry, have a seat, I'll do my best not to embarrass myself this time."  Harry pulled up a chair as he started laughing again.

"Don't worry about it Captain, we're all human."  Janeway just smiled as B'Elanna tried her damnedest not to laugh.  "You must be hungry Captain, I've never seen you eat so much food before."  B'Elanna lost all control.  Janeway could feel it coming, but could do nothing to stop her counterpart.  The laughter erupted.  Harry just watched his captain with a bit of concern in his eyes.

"Harry my friend, you're alright.  I think I'll just promote you to Lieutenant.  I think you've waited long enough."  Harry's jaw dropped to the deck.

Damnit B'Elanna, what are you doing?

Oh, lighten Captain I'm just having some fun with poor Harry, besides he really does need a promotion.

That's not for you to decide Lieutenant, unless you want to be demoted to Ensign.  Harry was still in shock.

"Did you mean that Captain?"

"Of course not Harry, I mean I did, but not."

"I don't understand Captain."

Neither do I Captain.  Which is it, do or don't?

"B'Elanna, I've just about had it with you."  Now, Harry looked even more confused.  He was looking around for B'Elanna, but she was nowhere in sight.

"Captain, what are you talking about?  B'Elanna isn't even here.  Are you sure you're alright?"  B'Elanna busted out laughing again; but Harry only saw it as the Captain laughing hysterically.  He looked like he was about ready to bolt to get away from his crazed captain.

Maybe you'd better tell him the truth Captain.

You don't leave me a hell of a lot of choice do you Lieutenant?  "Harry, there's something you need to know.  Lieutenant Torres is right here with us."

"What are you talking about Captain?  I don't see her anywhere."

"She's here, inside of me."  This time Harry's jaw dropped beyond the deck and out into space.

"Maybe I'd better get you to sickbay Captain.  Something is wrong with you."

B'Elanna, I could use a little help here.

Ok, ok.  "Hey Starfleet, It's really me."  Harry rubbed his eyes in total confusion.

"See Ensign, I would never talk to you like that.  B'Elanna really is inside with me.  The Doctor had to transfer her consciousness into me until he could repair all the damage to her body, and it wasn't me who let out that disgusting belch on the bridge earlier."

"See Starfleet, you were right all along.  That was as good as mine because it was mine."  Again, B'Elanna couldn't hold back the laughter.  The look of shock on poor Harry's face was worth all this trouble, and then some.

"This is the craziest thing I've ever heard of.  How is it possible?"

"I'll spare you the details Ensign, but believe me it's the craziest thing I've ever done."

"Yes, but you love me and you know it Captain.  What would you do without me?"

"At this point Lieutenant, I'd like to find out."  This time it was Harry who started laughing.  He was finding this as comical as the Doctor had.  "Stop laughing Harry, it's not funny."

"Not funny!  This is the funniest thing that's happened yet on this ship.  I wish Tom was here to see it."  Just then, Janeway's com-badge chirped.

"Tuvok to Janeway.  The Flyer will be arriving in ten minutes.  I thought you'd like to meet them in the shuttle-bay."

"Understood thank you Tuvok, Janeway out."

"Looks like you're about to get your wish Harry.  Come on Captain, I've got a husband to greet."

"Hold on B'Elanna, Tom isn't going to understand this.  You're going to scare the Hell out of him."

"Captain, can I please come with you?  I wouldn't want to miss this for a Borg conduit to the Alpha Quadrant."  Janeway, with B'Elanna's insistent help was already heading for the door.

"Why not, it's going to be one crazy scene."  Harry ran to catch up to them.

"Captain, I just have one more question, do I get that promotion or not?"

"Not!"

"Sorry Harry, I tried."  They all three continued laughing as they walked to the shuttle-bay.

***

"B'Elanna, would you quit with the pacing around.  You're driving me nuts." 

"Sorry Captain, I'm just excited to see Tom."  Harry started laughing again.  "What are you laughing at now Starfleet?"

"This is by far the funniest thing I've seen in the Delta Quadrant.  Captain, how long does B'Elanna get to stay inside you?  I hope for a while longer, this could be good for ship morale."

"Ensign Kim, while I'm glad we are so entertaining, the sooner I get rid of my sidekick, the better.  Maybe you'd like to have a half Klingon in your head who never shuts up and eats like a pig."

"No thank you Captain.  I'll just enjoy it from a distance."

"Coward."  Harry wasn't sure which one had said it, but chose not to ask.  The Flyer had docked and the bay was depressurizing.

"Oh com on hurry up already."

"B'Elanna, I think you're forgetting something.  Tom isn't going to even see you so you're going to have to calm down or you'll scare him half to death."  Before Janeway got a comment out of B'Elanna, or an inkling of what was about to happen, B'Elanna, in Janeway's body took off running toward Tom as he exited the Flyer.

"Tom, Tom!"  Too late, B'Elanna had flung herself, or Janeway into Tom's arms.

B'Elanna, stop!  Janeway screamed into B'Elanna's mind.  It didn't faze her in the least.  She had planted her lips onto Tom's, kissing him very deeply and passionately.  B'Elanna, for god's sakes, stop!  They hadn't noticed that Chakotay had come out of the Flyer just standing in total shock at the scene in front of him.  Harry Kim was laughing hysterically.  B'Elanna please, I think I'm going to be sick.  Finally, Tom managed to push the captain off of him.  His look of total surprise mirrored Chakotay's.

Sorry Captain.

Oh, you're going to be Lieutenant.  Janeway had back up from Tom and was wiping her mouth.  She glanced over at Chakotay and saw his horrified expression.  It was almost funny, but right now, her only thought was how to kill her chief engineer.  Tom was the first one to manage a word.

"Captain, I missed you too, but what the hell is going on?  I mean the kiss was nice and all, but I'm a married man."

"I know that Mr. Paris."  B'Elanna started laughing.  B'Elanna, knock it off; you're just making this worse.

"This isn't funny Captain.  What the hell is wrong with you?"  Before she could get B'Elanna to stop laughing and get an answer out, Chakotay cut in.  He was headed for the door.

"If you'll excuse me Captain.  I've got some reports to work on."  He was already out the door.

"Chakotay, wait!  I can explain."  He just continued down the corridor without a glance back.  "Now look what you've done Lieutenant.  Chakotay thinks it was me kissing Tom."

"You were kissing me Captain, and who are you talking to?  What is going on here?"  By this time, Harry was rolling on the floor with laughter.  "Harry, what in the hell is wrong with you?  Has the whole ship gone mad?"

"Probably, but we can explain this Tom.  Harry, don't you have something better to do, like scrub the exhaust manifolds on deck twelve."

"Yes Ma'am."  Harry ran out the door, still laughing.

'This should be good Captain."  Tom folded his arms in front of him just waiting for the explanation.

B'Elanna, I think that's your Que, and you better make it believable.

"Tom, it's me B'Elanna.  You can't tell me you didn't recognize that kiss.  It's me, your wife, who else could kiss you like that?"  Tom did not look convinced.

"Apparently you Captain, I had know idea you were so, passionate."  Tom received a slug on the arm from B'Elanna.  This time it was Janeway who started laughing.

This could be fun B'Elanna, you're doing great.

"Well, why don't you help me out here?"

Sorry, three's a crowd.

"What did you hit me for Captain?  It was a compliment."

"I hit you, you stupid Flyboy, and I'll do it again if you don't pay attention.  It really is me, your wife.  I'm in here with the captain.  Do I need to kiss you again to get you to believe me?"

Try it, and you are dead Lieutenant.

"By all means Captain, be my guest."  This time it was Janeway who slugged him, even harder than B'Elanna had.

"Ouch!  Would you stop doing that?"

"Not until you listen to us.  B'Elanna is in here with me and it's no picnic either.  Why in the hell would I kiss you like that?  That was not me, come on Tom would I ever do something like that?"

"Hum, well now that I think about it, probably not.  You won't even kiss Chakotay and we all know you love him."  He was rewarded with another slug, which came from both of them this time.  "Would you stop doing that?"

"Tom please, it really is me.  If you come to sickbay, I can prove it."

Tom just stood looking at Janeway as if trying to see inside her.  He wasn't convinced, but he had a bad feeling about the whole thing.  If his wife was really inside the captain, then what had happened to her while he was gone?  That thought was the most disturbing of all.

"Tom, B'Elanna really is in here.  It was the only way we could save her life."

"Please Tom, just come with us to sickbay.  The Doctor will be able to explain better than we can."  B'Elanna held Janeway's had out for him to take.  He reluctantly took her hand.  B'Elanna held tightly to Tom and this time Janeway felt how important the physical contact was.  They walked out the door, hand in hand to sickbay.  They received more than a few awkward glances as they passed some of the crew, but the three remained quiet, not wanting to even try to explain.

***

"Doctor, please tell me this isn't real?"  Tom let go of Janeway's hand and rushed to the side of his wife lying on the bio-bed.  The Doctor looked up, startled at the sound of his voice.

"Welcome back Mr. Paris, and I'm sorry to say it is all true."  The Doctor had so far done a remarkable job on B'Elanna's body, which was a good thing Janeway noted.  If Tom had seen the condition of his wife before he would have been impossible to reason with.  As it was, he looked like he was about to faint.

"Tom, come over here and sit down, you look like you've just seen a ghost."  B'Elanna helped her husband over to a chair and knelt down in front of him.  Janeway remained quiet letting husband and wife work this out.  "Tom, I was working on a ruptured conduit when it exploded.  I was trying to push Vorik out of the way, but the blast caught me before I could move.  I know how strange it is to see me lying there, believe me it's no picnic seeing yourself like that, but I look a hell of a lot better than I did.  The Doctor's doing everything he can."

"Lieutenant Paris, I can assure you I'll have your wife back together as soon as I can, but it's going to be awhile longer."

"How much longer Doctor?"  Janeway cut in.

"I'm not sure Captain.  It's taking longer than I had originally hoped.  I'm doing everything I can."  Janeway managed to pull herself away from Tom's grasp and started pacing around sickbay.  She was rubbing her aching head as she paced.  The Doctor followed her and scanned her again with his tricorder.  "Captain, how bad is the headache?"

"I can live with it, but not forever Doctor.  This is a lot harder than I thought it would be, not to mention the gossip B'Elanna is causing."

"Hey, it's not just me Captain.  I couldn't have done it without you."  B'Elanna started laughing and was shortly joined by her husband.

"B'Elanna, it really is you in there."  Tom jumped up and ran to B'Elanna, picking Janeway up and hugging her tightly.

"Tom, let go I can't breathe."  He gently sat her back down on the ground, but didn't release his hold on her.

"Oh B'Elanna, thank god you're ok, well sort of."  He moved in to claim Janeway's lips again.

"Mr. Paris, if you kiss me again, you won't see the outside of the brig for a hell of a long time."  Tom stopped just as his lips touched hers.  B'Elanna was laughing again.

"Sorry Captain, I just needed to show my wife how much I love her.  This is so damn confusing."

"No kidding Flyboy, try it from my side.  You know, what I want to do with you right now."  Tom backed away from Janeway and started laughing again.

"Oh the possibilities, maybe we should try it."  He gave them a devilish smile, which only rewarded him with another slug on the arm.  He had no doubt, of whom it came from this time.  B'Elanna was laughing; the Doctor was beside himself, he'd never had so much fun, and Janeway was fuming.

"All three of you are on report and B'Elanna, stop thinking what you are thinking, cause it's not going to happen, not with my body that is."  The two men choked back their laughter.

I'm sorry Captain, but it's not like you haven't been thinking the same thing, only with Chakotay.

"B'Elanna!"  Janeway yelled out.

Hey, I didn't say it out loud, your secret's safe with me.

"Captain, what's wrong, is B'Elanna alright?"

"No Mr. Paris, I'm going to kill her."

"I said I was sorry Captain.  You are such a grouch, are you sure you're not half Klingon?"

"Well it would seem I am now, wouldn't it.  Doctor, can't you give me more of that sedative so it will knock B'Elanna out until you finish her body?"

"I don't think that's a good idea Captain.  I've already pushed our luck with the sedative I gave you earlier.  It's not good for either one of you and I can't knock B'Elanna out without doing the same to you.  I would suggest that you try and relax Captain, your heart rate and blood pressure are too high."  Janeway slumped down into the chair that Tom had been sitting in.  All fun and teasing had stopped they could all see how much they were hurting the captain, especially B'Elanna.

Kathryn, I'm really sorry.  I just don't know how else to deal with this I don't mean to hurt you.  I owe you my life.  Now don't you cry, you'll make our eyes puffy.  B'Elanna's thoughts brought a genuine smile to Janeway's face.

We can't have that now, can we Lieutenant.  This time it was Tom who knelt down in front of his wife and his Captain with concern written on his face.  He took hold of her hands and Janeway didn't try to pull away.

"I'm sorry Captain, B'Elanna.  I just don't how to react to this either.  I come home and find my wife isn't my wife, but she is and she's dead, but not.  It's crazy."  His eyes had misted over, which brought the compassion out in Janeway.  She could also feel how much B'Elanna wanted to comfort her husband.  Janeway and B'Elanna put her hands on Tom's cheeks and wiped the few tears away that had escaped.  Looking into his moist eyes Janeway smiled slightly.

Please Kathryn, just one more tiny kiss.  He needs me.  B'Elanna was silently pleading.

Fine, just a…  Before Janeway could finish the thought, her lips were locked with Tom's again.  This time Janeway tried to stay out of it, but it wasn't easy with the feel of warm lips on hers.  She focused her thoughts on someone else and that someone just happened to walk into sickbay at that moment.

"Oh this is just too much!"  At the sound of Chakotay's voice, Tom, Janeway and B'Elanna stood up with a jolt of surprise.  The Doctor was just smiling sweetly.  Life was great for the hologram. 

"Chakotay, it's not what you think."  Tom was the first to get his mouth to move.

"Mr. Paris, I don't really give a damn what this is.  If you want to make out with the captain, who am I to stop you?  I just can't believe you would do this to B'Elanna and even worse, I can't believe the great Captain Janeway, holder to such strict parameters is doing this.  You make me sick, both of you."  They all just stood with mouths hanging open at the shocking words coming from their usually soft-spoken and understanding first officer.  Even the Doctor had stopped smiling.  Chakotay had turned his back on them ready to leave sickbay.

"Commander, you are out of line.  How dare you talk to me that way?"

"Excuse me Captain, you're right, I shouldn't talk to you that way.  I shouldn't talk to you at all."  He left the room before she could say another word.

"I would say that didn't go too well."

"Shut up Doctor."  They all three said at once.

"Fine, I can see I'm not needed anymore."  He walked back to B'Elanna's bio-bed and continued his work.

"Captain, maybe I should go talk to him.  He might listen to me."

"Well he might if you were you, and besides he shouldn't act like that.  Who the hell does he think he is anyway?"

"I would guess he thinks the woman he loves is betraying him with his ex-Maquis trader, who was supposed to be his friend.  If I was in his shoes, I'd think the same thing.  Maybe I should go talk to him."

"Tom, Chakotay would just as soon kill you right now as listen to anything you had to say."

"You do have a point B'Elanna, but we can't let him think what he's thinking."

"Why not, it serves him right, the arrogant pig."

"B'Elanna, was that you or the captain speaking?"

"It wasn't me Flyboy.  That was all our loving captain."

"Would you two just leave me alone so I can think?  Tom, don't you have a shuttle to unload?"

"Yes Ma'am.  I'll see you later B'Elanna, well sort of."  Tom quickly kissed his wife on Janeway's cheek and scurried out the door.

"He is so sweet."

"A real charmer indeed."  Janeway tapped her com-badge.  "Janeway to Tuvok."

"Yes Captain."

"I'm leaving command of Voyager in your capable hands until tomorrow morning.  I'll be in my quarters if it's an emergency."

"Aye Captain.  What about Commander Chakotay, will he be assuming command?"

"No, if he shows up on the bridge, kick him off.  You are in command."

"Understood, get some rest Captain, Tuvok out."

"That was a bit harsh wasn't it?"

"Mind your own business Lieutenant."

"Yes Ma'am."

"Doctor, I want double-time on B'Elanna's body.  I'll be in my quarters if  and when you ever get finished."

"I'm doing my best Captain, but some things just can't be rushed."  Janeway just glared at the Doctor then turned and left sickbay.  The Doctor let out a sight of relief.  He was glad he wasn't the one sharing the captain's body and mind.  His holo-matrices would destabilize for sure.