Innocence of a Child
By Gray Nymph
"Yahiko!" Kaoru called out into the early morning stillness of the dojo. She put her hands on her hips as she stopped in the doorway of Yahiko's room. Her student lay asleep on his futon, snoring away happily. Usually, Yahiko awoke earlier than she did, but today, Kaoru had gotten up early to practice on her own in a field nearby. She wiped a sleeve across her forehead as she stomped over to the futon.
"Yahiko!" She grabbed his shoulder and shook it heartily, jerking the young samurai awake.
He stared up at her with slightly confused deep brown eyes. "Uh…"
Kaoru, irritated as she was, could not help laughing at the dazed look in her student's eyes. Her grip on his shoulder changed to an affectionate squeeze. "Get up, Yahiko. It's time for your lesson."
"Ugh." The dazed look disappeared, replaced by a wicked gleam. Somehow, Kaoru just knew what would come next. "What a face to wake up to." He groaned.
Now thoroughly irritated, Kaoru pushed him none-too-gently and stalked toward the doorway. "You'd better get up, Yahiko, or you won't be getting a lesson today!"
Hearing him groan again behind her, Kaoru absently wondered what was wrong with Yahiko. She stepped out into the hallway, closing the sliding partition behind her. Yahiko usually had so much energy in the morning, ready for his next lesson in the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. Kaoru shrugged.
"Good morning, Kaoru-dono." Kenshin came around the corner of the hallway, two little girls tagging along behind him. Giggles of delight filled the air as Ayame and Suzume tugged on Kenshin's hakama. Every time they did, he would turn around and make a funny face that would promptly send them into fits of giggles again.
"Good morning, Kenshin. Ayame, Suzume, did your grandfather come with you today?" Kaoru asked the two little girls.
"He's outside eating," Suzume replied.
Then, Kaoru noticed the fishing pole in Kenshin's hand. "Where are you going?" As soon as she asked, Kaoru wanted to smack herself. A fishing pole meant Kenshin was going to the river.
Kenshin grinned. "Fishing. I'm taking Ayame and Suzume with me."
Kaoru ruffled the girls' hair and smiled. "Keep Kenshin out of trouble, okay, girls?"
They nodded and then giggled again. "We promise to make sure he's good!"
The troop of three walked out of the dojo. Kaoru followed them, watching as Ayame clung to Kenshin's leg while Suzume had a grip on his free hand. At the dojo's front gate, Kenshin turned around and saluted her with his fishing pole. He smiled.
"We'll be back soon, Kaoru-dono."
She waved back and the little group stepped onto the path, Kenshin sliding closed the gate behind him. Kaoru turned to Dr. Gensai, who was sitting on the porch, a plate of food on his lap.
"Kenshin was good enough to make me breakfast, Kaoru," he told her.
"This is an unexpected visit, Dr. Gensai." Kaoru sat down beside him, propping her chin in her hands. "It is good to see you and the girls though."
"I came to check on Yahiko." Dr. Gensai shoved a last piece of his breakfast into his mouth. "Tsubame said that when Yahiko left the Akabeko last night, he seemed a little sick. So I promised the girl that I would check on him. She was so worried about him." Dr. Gensai laughed. "I thought Megumi could handle this morning's patients for a while. And the girls wanted to see Kenshin."
Kaoru nodded. "I thought Yahiko didn't seem quite like himself this morning."
Dr. Gensai laughed again. "It's probably as simple as a hangover."
"What?" Kaoru could not believe it. Yahiko had been drinking?
"I think Sano let him drink too much sake. Tsubame said that Sano and Yahiko were there together and Sano somehow managed to convince Yahiko to try some."
Kaoru shook her head angrily. "That Sano! I'll give him a piece of my mind the next time I see him!"
Dr. Gensai stood to his feet. "Why don't you go down to the river with Kenshin and the girls, Kaoru? As soon as I'm done, I have to get back to the clinic. Can you have the girls back here in about thirty minutes?"
"Yes, thank you, Dr. Gensai." Kaoru motioned inside the dojo. "You know where Yahiko's room is?"
Dr. Gensai nodded and made a shooing motion with his hands. "Go on, I'll take care of Yahiko."
Kaoru smiled and headed for the dojo's gate.
A few minutes later, she walked near the river, listening for the sounds of girlish laughter and the answering teasing of Kenshin's voice. She quickly found them at Kenshin's favorite fishing spot, the shade of an old gnarled tree whose branches spread to cover a wide area of the riverbank. She almost stepped into the clearing but thought better of it when she saw that Kenshin was helping Suzume cast the fishing line while Ayame played near the water. Suzume's forehead was etched with deep concentration and there was such joy on Kenshin's face that Kaoru hated to disturb their fishing lesson. So she sidestepped away to observe them from behind a smaller tree nearby.
"Ken-nii!" Suzume's voice was high-pitched with excitement. "Something's tugging!"
Kaoru watched as the fishing line went taut. Kenshin tightened his hands around Suzume's smaller ones and helped her reel in the line. Soon, a fish lay flopping on the grass and Suzume clapped her hands in delight.
"I caught one! I caught one!" She sang happily.
"You certainly did!" Kenshin said, stooping to cut off the line. He hung the fish from a low tree branch. Kaoru caught a glimpse of his face. He was grinning widely as Ayame came running to see Suzume's successful catch.
He'll make such a good father… Kaoru blushed as the thought came to her mind.
And just who will he be marrying, Kaoru? You? An accusing voice within said to her.
Kaoru ignored the accusing voice, refusing to let the logical side of herself ruin her enjoyment of the scene before her.
Ayame and Suzume danced around in circles. They were so innocent. Kaoru watched them for a few moments, but soon her attention focused on Kenshin. He had finished tying another hook to the line and was now watching the girls dance. Even from this distance, Kaoru could see the regret in his eyes. What was he regretting? His youth? And then she knew.
His innocence. He regretted losing his innocence.
So many people got the wrong first impression of Kenshin. They always thought he was young, innocent, naïve. None of them knew of the terrors he had gone through, the people he had killed, or the pain he had experienced. Kaoru often wondered how he managed to hide evidence of his inner pain behind that childish, oblivious mask of his. She wondered if he would ever open up to her, tell her about what had happened to him in the past. He never talked to her about it, and she had never pushed him to talk about it. She had told him long ago that she wanted the rurouni to stay, not the hitokiri Battousai. At first, she had thought it was only the rurouni she loved, but gradually, she came to realize that Battousai was as much a part of him as the rurouni was. Did he realize that she accepted both? She would do everything in her power to prevent him from becoming Battousai again, but if he did, she would still love him…
"Kaoru-dono, why are you hiding behind that tree?" Kenshin's gentle voice interrupted her thoughts.
Kaoru felt a warm flush creep up her cheeks as she stepped out into full view. "I…I… need to take the girls back, Kenshin."
Now, there was a mischievous look in his eyes. It was as if she had never seen the regret in them. "All right, Kaoru-dono." He turned to the girls and knelt down. "Ayame, Suzume, it's time for you to go."
They responded with disappointed protests, but Kenshin gave them a gentle push up the riverbank. "We'll be right behind you."
The girls, still looking disappointed, followed his instructions. Kaoru was about to follow them when she felt a hand on her arm.
"Kaoru-dono, you should have joined us." Everything about Kenshin was so gentle, even his reprimands.
Kaoru refused to look at him, not wanting him to see the red in her cheeks. "I… I wanted to watch… you with the girls."
"Ah." Kenshin nodded as if he understood. "What did you see?"
Kaoru finally decided to look at him. "I saw an innocent rurouni who loves children." She dared him to counter her answer.
Kenshin shook his head. "I envy Ayame and Suzume their innocence. I used to be as they were, but Hiko, my master, changed that. As did the war." He looked at her, and she saw the regret she had seen before in those violet eyes.
"The innocent rurouni is the only way I can keep Battousai from revealing himself. It is often… difficult." His grip on her arm tightened. "Especially when I am with you, Kaoru-dono."
Kaoru tried to jerk out of his grasp, but he was too strong. It was like trying to break away from a double-linked chain. "When you're with me?" She echoed uncertainly. His gaze had become penetrating and she could almost see the rurouni and Battousai merging before her eyes.
He let go of her arm and sighed. "Yes, Kaoru-dono."
Kaoru could not believe that Kenshin had admitted such a thing to her. He rarely talked about Battousai and to think that she sometimes brought that part of him to the surface was frightening. She looked down at the ground, unable to bear the pleading in his eyes any longer. What did he want her to say? That she loved him? She felt her chest tighten as she kept herself from laughing cynically. Suddenly, it came to her, what she should say.
This time, she put a hand on his arm. She gazed up at him, giving him a hesitant smile. "I accept the rurouni and Battousai, Kenshin. It doesn't matter which part of you exists, I will always…"
Kenshin stopped her, a finger on her lips. "That is all I needed to hear, Kaoru." He smiled gently. And that endless happiness filled his eyes again. He took her hand. "Come, Kaoru-dono. We should catch up with Ayame and Suzume."
He picked up his fishing pole and the fish hanging from the tree branch. And Kaoru found herself walking back to the dojo with Kenshin, hand-in-hand. She glanced at him as they strolled, the fishing pole slung over one shoulder, a lone fish swinging from the end of the pole. Then, she looked down at their clasped hands. She smiled. She briefly wondered what a passerby would have thought they looked like. And a brief phrase suddenly struck her.
Like innocent children…
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Author's ramblings: I don't know where this fic idea came from. It just seemed to write itself. Anyway, this fic takes place before Kyoto, otherwise, Kaoru wouldn't be asking herself about Kenshin's past. I'm not sure how much of his past Kenshin revealed to Kaoru before Kyoto though. I think the extent of her knowledge is that he was Battousai and that he made many enemies. This fic is for those of you who wanted me to write more. ^_^ I'm not sure how much more I can write of RK fics since I don't know as much about the series as I do about Gundam Wing. Perhaps after the next volume comes out, I can write something about the Kyoto Arc. We'll see what happens… I'd like to write a fic about Kaoru and Yahiko's relationship. I think it's such a sweet one in spite of Yahiko's insults. ^_^