Chapter 2
Kate stood outside the dinning room, drawing in a deep breath to prepare herself for what was to come. She had to face her family at some point, it might as well be now. Even though she hadn't seen them in five years, all she felt was dread. Her mother's voice, solioguizing on the importance of the work done by the Ladies Auxillary, was already getting on Kate's nerves as she listend from the hall. And her sister's high pitched laugh had only worsened over time. How was it that she was related to such senseless women?
"Mama?" Grace asked quietly. Since they had left China she had been much more subdued. Kate knew that she missed Danny desperately. They both did.
Kate tried to smile reassuringly. "Come on Grace. Let's go have some breakfast." She picked her up and walked calmly into the room. All eyes turned towards them. Her mother even stopped talking. "Good morning, everyone," she said as cheerfully as possible, feeling extremely uncomfortable as they all stared at her silently.
"Kate Darling!" her mother recovered first, rising out of her seat and sweeping towards them to evelope them in a perfumed hug. "Darling," she said as she pressed her cheek to Kate's.
"Mother," Kate responded, kissing the air next to her mother's cheek, in their usual greeting.
"Let me look at you!" Kate felt her mother's eyes flick over her and Grace's appearances. She could tell that her mother was shocked, but trying to hide it. "You look wonderful!" she finally declared.
"You were always a bad liar, Mother," Kate told her, patting her on the shoulder.
Julianna wasn't as kind. "You look dreadful." Kate smiled at that. Julianna hadn't changed.
"Julianna!" her mother gasped.
"Well, she does," her sister pointed out. "Where did you get that dress? It's hanging on you. And look at your hair! You have circles under your eyes and....."
"That's enough, Julianna," their father interrupted.
Kate looked over at her father who hadn't risen from the table. "That's quite all right, Dad," she told him as she walked over towards him. "I'm aware of how..'dreadful' I look. Unfortunately, 4 weeks living on ships, trains and planes, doesn't do much for a person's appearance. Some how I just never made it to a decent modiste." She leaned down to kiss his cheek.
"It's good to see you," he told her, patting her awkwardly. "You'll have to excuse your mother and sister. It was only last week that I told them that you were alive and on your way home."
"That's right," Julianna chimed in. "We've been mourning you for almost two years."
"Yes, I imagine you have," Kate replied. "Just stopped wearing black, I suppose. It must have been dreadful for you. It has never been your color."
Julianna floundered comically. "I wore black for awhile, but it isn't necessary........"
Her father held up his hand to silence her. "Don't bait your sister," he told Kate. "So, is this Grace?" he asked, changeing topics.
Kate nodded. "Grace, this your Grandpa Richard," Kate introduced her. Grace was not used to the attention, so she hid her face.
Not to be left out, Kate's mother hurried over, her arms open. "And I'm your Grandma, Darling." She tried to hug Grace, but was unable to. Frowning, she looked up at Kate.
"She's not used to being around other people," Kate explained. "She misses her home. She'll get used to you eventually, just don't push her."
Her mother looked disappointed. "But we've waited so long to see her! Give Grandma a hug," she cajoled. Grace squirmed away.
"Mother!"
"Jane, that's enough," Kate's father barked. "Give the child some space. I'm sure the last few weeks have been very hard on her. And Kate. They don't need you clinging."
"But Richard," she whined, like a small child.
"Give her time, Jane," he said more kindly.
Obviously miffed, her mother returned to her seat. "James," she called over her shoulder. "Please inform Miss Jones that she is needed here." Turning to smile over at Kate, she became the hostess that she had always aspired to be. "Please help yourself to anything on the sideboard. I'm sure you remember what a good cook Matilda is."
Giving her mother a disbelieving look, Kate moved to get her and Grace some breakfast. Some things never changed. Her mother was just as superficial and proper as before. The sight of all the food displayed on the side board caused Kate's stomach to heave. This amount, set out to feed 4 adults, could have fed her and Danny and Grace for a week at least. Selecting some simple scrambled eggs and toast for Grace, and some toast and fruit for herself, Kate returned to the table.
"Is that all your going to eat?" Julianna asked.
"Julianna!" her mother scolded mildly.
"Well," Julianna pouted, "she could stand to gain a little weight you know."
Kate tried to smile at her sister. "My stomach hasn't settled yet. And I'm not used to such a rich diet, I wouldn't want to overdo it on my first day, now would I?"
They ate quietly for awhile, though the silence was anything but comfortable. Grace picked at her food, awed by her surroundings and the people staring at her. Kate forced herself to eat each bite of toast.
James appeared at the doorway, bowing formally. "Miss Jones, Ma'am," he intoned. A woman, older than Kate and dressed rather severely in a brown dress with her hair scraped back in a bun, entered behind the butler.
"You wished to see me, Ma'am?" she asked Kate's mother.
"Oh, yes! Miss. Jones," she chirped, her voice falsely excited. Kate felt her stomach tighten. Her mother was going to try something. "Kate, I'd like you to meet Miss Jones. I've taken the liberty of hiring her to help you with Grace. She comes very highly recommended. Verna Maplethrope simply adores her. She was wonderful with her girls - do you remember Maggie and Amanda? They're both married now, to wonderful men, and it's in part due to Miss Jones, here. She's helped us to refurbish the nursery so that Grace will have all that she needs to become a proper young lady in New York society.."
Kate looked at her mother as she babbled. "No," was all she said.
"and she....No?" her mother trailed off. "Whatever do you mean, Darling?" she asked, her bewilderment showing on her face.
"I mean no," Kate told her. "Grace does not need Miss Jones, no matter how highly recommended she comes. She stays with me. I will take care of her." Kate looked up at the forbidding looking woman. "I'm sorry that my mother has given you hope of employment, but your services are not needed." Turning back to her toast, Kate continued to eat, though each bite tasted like sawdust.
"Kate," her mother said, the tone of her voice saying that she was trying to reason with her stubborn daughter, "Miss Jones is highly recommended. She will do wonders for Grace. You can't expect to take care of her full time."
"I have since she's been born," Kate pointed out.
"Well, that was different," her mother pressed. "You're here with us now. We can afford to take care of her properly."
Kate raised an eyebrow. "I haven't been taking care of her properly?" she asked. "I'm her mother. I will take care of her. She doesn't need a nanny."
"But Kate..." Waving a hand absently, her mother dismissed Miss Jones, who quickly bowed out of the room.
"No, Mother. She's already had to leave behind her father and the only home she's ever known." Her mother stiffened and Julianna's fork stopped half way to her mouth. "I'm not going to leave her so that she can be raised by someone else because that's how things are done in New York."
"Her father is dead," her mother said stiffly.
Kate eyed everyone at the table, seeing the tension, the wariness. She understood instantly that Danny was to be one of the untouchable subjects. Five years ago, she would have read the signs and gone along with it, but not this time. Not now. She wasn't going to hide Danny from them, to pretend that he didn't exsist.
"Her father, the only father she has ever known," Kate told them calmly, "is still in China."
"Micheal died last December."
"Micheal," Kate said, her contempt for him obvious, "only contributed biologically. Danny is Grace's father."
"Who is he? What does he do?" Her mother demanded, as if these were the most important questions when talking about a person. "I can't believe you would leave your husband for some pilot."
"I've heard of this," Julianna piped in. "It's called the Florence Nighengale syndrome. Nurses fall in love with the men they take care of. Micheal told us how you saved this pilot's life. He showed us the medal he got for getting the other pilots to safety," she gave a sigh. "I certainly wouldn't leave my husband for some....pilot!" she declared, her mouth forming a small frown of disdain. "However would he support me?!"
Kate looked at her sister with undisguised disgust. "Oh, I'm sure Micheal told you a lot," she told her sister. "Probably none of it was true."
Her mother's cheek's flushed. "Are you saying Micheal lied to us?"
Kate looked her directly in the eyes. "Yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you."
"How could you say such a thing!" her mother demanded. "Micheal was a true gentleman. He..."
"Told you that Grace and I were dead," Kate interjected.
Her mother paused. "Well, that was different," she floundered. "He was trying to spare us the pain of knowing that you left your husband for some pilot."
"I left my husband?" Kate asked.
"Yes," her mother nodded emphatically. "He told us how the pilot held a knife to his throat and that you told him to leave. That you refused to go with him. He was torn apart by it."
Kate laughed humorlessly.
"Do you deny it," her mother asked.
"No," Kate said, shaking her head. "Danny held a knife to Micheal's throat. He saved my life."
"What nonsense is that? Micheal would never be a threat to his own wife!"
"You don't know Micheal, Mother," Kate told her.
"Elizabeth and Robert raised a perfect gentleman. Micheal was..."
"A monster," Kate interjected again. Standing Kate took Grace's hand. "I suppose Daddy has kept that unpleasnt information from you, as usual. But I'm sure he knows what kind of man I was married too." Seeing the look of affirmation in her father's eyes, Kate wanted to cry. She had hoped that she wasn't right, that he hadn't known, that he hadn't sacraficed his older daughter for profit and connections. Nodding stiffly, she turned to leave the room.
"Kate," he called after her. She stopped but didn't turn around. "I know now, but I didn't always know."
"When?" Kate asked. When he remained silent, she turned to face him. "When did you find out?" she demanded.
He looked away from her. "Four months after your wedding. I heard some rumors, I did some investigating."
"You knew that long ago, and yet you left me there," Kate said, her feeling of betrayal evident in the thickness of her voice. "You had no trouble pulling strings to get me out of there in the middle of a war, but you couldn't do it earlier? I sure hope you got what you wanted. I hope my happiness and well being were worth it. You knew, or could at least guess what my life was like, yet you left me over there. You left Danny there." Kate felt even more used and abused than she did after Micheal would have a go at her. She was little more than a bargaining tool to her father. She always had been. She turned to leave again.
"Kate," he called after her. "I'm sorry. If I could make it up to you......" Kate paused at the doorway.
"Get Danny out of there," she told him before walking away. As far as she was concerned, they were no longer related.
Kate stood outside the dinning room, drawing in a deep breath to prepare herself for what was to come. She had to face her family at some point, it might as well be now. Even though she hadn't seen them in five years, all she felt was dread. Her mother's voice, solioguizing on the importance of the work done by the Ladies Auxillary, was already getting on Kate's nerves as she listend from the hall. And her sister's high pitched laugh had only worsened over time. How was it that she was related to such senseless women?
"Mama?" Grace asked quietly. Since they had left China she had been much more subdued. Kate knew that she missed Danny desperately. They both did.
Kate tried to smile reassuringly. "Come on Grace. Let's go have some breakfast." She picked her up and walked calmly into the room. All eyes turned towards them. Her mother even stopped talking. "Good morning, everyone," she said as cheerfully as possible, feeling extremely uncomfortable as they all stared at her silently.
"Kate Darling!" her mother recovered first, rising out of her seat and sweeping towards them to evelope them in a perfumed hug. "Darling," she said as she pressed her cheek to Kate's.
"Mother," Kate responded, kissing the air next to her mother's cheek, in their usual greeting.
"Let me look at you!" Kate felt her mother's eyes flick over her and Grace's appearances. She could tell that her mother was shocked, but trying to hide it. "You look wonderful!" she finally declared.
"You were always a bad liar, Mother," Kate told her, patting her on the shoulder.
Julianna wasn't as kind. "You look dreadful." Kate smiled at that. Julianna hadn't changed.
"Julianna!" her mother gasped.
"Well, she does," her sister pointed out. "Where did you get that dress? It's hanging on you. And look at your hair! You have circles under your eyes and....."
"That's enough, Julianna," their father interrupted.
Kate looked over at her father who hadn't risen from the table. "That's quite all right, Dad," she told him as she walked over towards him. "I'm aware of how..'dreadful' I look. Unfortunately, 4 weeks living on ships, trains and planes, doesn't do much for a person's appearance. Some how I just never made it to a decent modiste." She leaned down to kiss his cheek.
"It's good to see you," he told her, patting her awkwardly. "You'll have to excuse your mother and sister. It was only last week that I told them that you were alive and on your way home."
"That's right," Julianna chimed in. "We've been mourning you for almost two years."
"Yes, I imagine you have," Kate replied. "Just stopped wearing black, I suppose. It must have been dreadful for you. It has never been your color."
Julianna floundered comically. "I wore black for awhile, but it isn't necessary........"
Her father held up his hand to silence her. "Don't bait your sister," he told Kate. "So, is this Grace?" he asked, changeing topics.
Kate nodded. "Grace, this your Grandpa Richard," Kate introduced her. Grace was not used to the attention, so she hid her face.
Not to be left out, Kate's mother hurried over, her arms open. "And I'm your Grandma, Darling." She tried to hug Grace, but was unable to. Frowning, she looked up at Kate.
"She's not used to being around other people," Kate explained. "She misses her home. She'll get used to you eventually, just don't push her."
Her mother looked disappointed. "But we've waited so long to see her! Give Grandma a hug," she cajoled. Grace squirmed away.
"Mother!"
"Jane, that's enough," Kate's father barked. "Give the child some space. I'm sure the last few weeks have been very hard on her. And Kate. They don't need you clinging."
"But Richard," she whined, like a small child.
"Give her time, Jane," he said more kindly.
Obviously miffed, her mother returned to her seat. "James," she called over her shoulder. "Please inform Miss Jones that she is needed here." Turning to smile over at Kate, she became the hostess that she had always aspired to be. "Please help yourself to anything on the sideboard. I'm sure you remember what a good cook Matilda is."
Giving her mother a disbelieving look, Kate moved to get her and Grace some breakfast. Some things never changed. Her mother was just as superficial and proper as before. The sight of all the food displayed on the side board caused Kate's stomach to heave. This amount, set out to feed 4 adults, could have fed her and Danny and Grace for a week at least. Selecting some simple scrambled eggs and toast for Grace, and some toast and fruit for herself, Kate returned to the table.
"Is that all your going to eat?" Julianna asked.
"Julianna!" her mother scolded mildly.
"Well," Julianna pouted, "she could stand to gain a little weight you know."
Kate tried to smile at her sister. "My stomach hasn't settled yet. And I'm not used to such a rich diet, I wouldn't want to overdo it on my first day, now would I?"
They ate quietly for awhile, though the silence was anything but comfortable. Grace picked at her food, awed by her surroundings and the people staring at her. Kate forced herself to eat each bite of toast.
James appeared at the doorway, bowing formally. "Miss Jones, Ma'am," he intoned. A woman, older than Kate and dressed rather severely in a brown dress with her hair scraped back in a bun, entered behind the butler.
"You wished to see me, Ma'am?" she asked Kate's mother.
"Oh, yes! Miss. Jones," she chirped, her voice falsely excited. Kate felt her stomach tighten. Her mother was going to try something. "Kate, I'd like you to meet Miss Jones. I've taken the liberty of hiring her to help you with Grace. She comes very highly recommended. Verna Maplethrope simply adores her. She was wonderful with her girls - do you remember Maggie and Amanda? They're both married now, to wonderful men, and it's in part due to Miss Jones, here. She's helped us to refurbish the nursery so that Grace will have all that she needs to become a proper young lady in New York society.."
Kate looked at her mother as she babbled. "No," was all she said.
"and she....No?" her mother trailed off. "Whatever do you mean, Darling?" she asked, her bewilderment showing on her face.
"I mean no," Kate told her. "Grace does not need Miss Jones, no matter how highly recommended she comes. She stays with me. I will take care of her." Kate looked up at the forbidding looking woman. "I'm sorry that my mother has given you hope of employment, but your services are not needed." Turning back to her toast, Kate continued to eat, though each bite tasted like sawdust.
"Kate," her mother said, the tone of her voice saying that she was trying to reason with her stubborn daughter, "Miss Jones is highly recommended. She will do wonders for Grace. You can't expect to take care of her full time."
"I have since she's been born," Kate pointed out.
"Well, that was different," her mother pressed. "You're here with us now. We can afford to take care of her properly."
Kate raised an eyebrow. "I haven't been taking care of her properly?" she asked. "I'm her mother. I will take care of her. She doesn't need a nanny."
"But Kate..." Waving a hand absently, her mother dismissed Miss Jones, who quickly bowed out of the room.
"No, Mother. She's already had to leave behind her father and the only home she's ever known." Her mother stiffened and Julianna's fork stopped half way to her mouth. "I'm not going to leave her so that she can be raised by someone else because that's how things are done in New York."
"Her father is dead," her mother said stiffly.
Kate eyed everyone at the table, seeing the tension, the wariness. She understood instantly that Danny was to be one of the untouchable subjects. Five years ago, she would have read the signs and gone along with it, but not this time. Not now. She wasn't going to hide Danny from them, to pretend that he didn't exsist.
"Her father, the only father she has ever known," Kate told them calmly, "is still in China."
"Micheal died last December."
"Micheal," Kate said, her contempt for him obvious, "only contributed biologically. Danny is Grace's father."
"Who is he? What does he do?" Her mother demanded, as if these were the most important questions when talking about a person. "I can't believe you would leave your husband for some pilot."
"I've heard of this," Julianna piped in. "It's called the Florence Nighengale syndrome. Nurses fall in love with the men they take care of. Micheal told us how you saved this pilot's life. He showed us the medal he got for getting the other pilots to safety," she gave a sigh. "I certainly wouldn't leave my husband for some....pilot!" she declared, her mouth forming a small frown of disdain. "However would he support me?!"
Kate looked at her sister with undisguised disgust. "Oh, I'm sure Micheal told you a lot," she told her sister. "Probably none of it was true."
Her mother's cheek's flushed. "Are you saying Micheal lied to us?"
Kate looked her directly in the eyes. "Yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you."
"How could you say such a thing!" her mother demanded. "Micheal was a true gentleman. He..."
"Told you that Grace and I were dead," Kate interjected.
Her mother paused. "Well, that was different," she floundered. "He was trying to spare us the pain of knowing that you left your husband for some pilot."
"I left my husband?" Kate asked.
"Yes," her mother nodded emphatically. "He told us how the pilot held a knife to his throat and that you told him to leave. That you refused to go with him. He was torn apart by it."
Kate laughed humorlessly.
"Do you deny it," her mother asked.
"No," Kate said, shaking her head. "Danny held a knife to Micheal's throat. He saved my life."
"What nonsense is that? Micheal would never be a threat to his own wife!"
"You don't know Micheal, Mother," Kate told her.
"Elizabeth and Robert raised a perfect gentleman. Micheal was..."
"A monster," Kate interjected again. Standing Kate took Grace's hand. "I suppose Daddy has kept that unpleasnt information from you, as usual. But I'm sure he knows what kind of man I was married too." Seeing the look of affirmation in her father's eyes, Kate wanted to cry. She had hoped that she wasn't right, that he hadn't known, that he hadn't sacraficed his older daughter for profit and connections. Nodding stiffly, she turned to leave the room.
"Kate," he called after her. She stopped but didn't turn around. "I know now, but I didn't always know."
"When?" Kate asked. When he remained silent, she turned to face him. "When did you find out?" she demanded.
He looked away from her. "Four months after your wedding. I heard some rumors, I did some investigating."
"You knew that long ago, and yet you left me there," Kate said, her feeling of betrayal evident in the thickness of her voice. "You had no trouble pulling strings to get me out of there in the middle of a war, but you couldn't do it earlier? I sure hope you got what you wanted. I hope my happiness and well being were worth it. You knew, or could at least guess what my life was like, yet you left me over there. You left Danny there." Kate felt even more used and abused than she did after Micheal would have a go at her. She was little more than a bargaining tool to her father. She always had been. She turned to leave again.
"Kate," he called after her. "I'm sorry. If I could make it up to you......" Kate paused at the doorway.
"Get Danny out of there," she told him before walking away. As far as she was concerned, they were no longer related.