Part II - Coming Home
Willow welcomed Spike into her parent's modest two-story house. She felt a little awkward when she invited the vampire in, now this meant that he could drop by any time he wanted. That disturbed her just a little bit. She gave him a tour, starting with the first floor, going to the basement, and ending with the top floor and her room...
"This room is off limits to you Spike." Willow said sternly.
"Why pet?"
"B-because it is my room. There will be no coming in here without my permission do you understand?"
"What if I hear you screaming in the middle of the night?" he said with a half smile dancing across his lips.
"You better have good reason for coming in here or I'll stake you myself."
"Come on pet, I wouldn't hurt you."
"See this, resolve face. So you better just stay away from here unless I say otherwise...you wouldn't want to go back to Giles' place, would you?"
"Now, Red, that wasn't nice, what playing that card like that and all."
"Sorry it's just that I have this thing about privacy...and I don't want you disturbing that...I mean...it's awkward for me to have a guy staying here, let a lone a vampire..." Willow stammered...
"You mean to tell me that dogboy never stayed over?"
"No, Oz never stayed over here...he wasn't allowed."
"You're parents are hardly here luv...You could have had him here and no one would know."
"I would know...and it just didn't seem right. Besides, Oz wasn't comfortable with it either...." Willow said, her lower lip quivering just a little. Hell how it got to him when she did that. Spike wondered if Willow even had so much as a clue as to how he felt about her, he doubted it, but he wondered.
"If it bothers you that much, then fine...I'll stay wherever you put me Red."
"Thank you. Since the basement is the darkest place in this house, you'll have to stay there. But I think that it'll be a bit more comfy than Giles'. I mean, we have a couch and tv and all kinds of stuff down there, just don't break anything, my parents would have a fit."
"Sure thing luv." Spike said nonchalantly. There was a long awkward moment. Willow had her hands jammed in the pockets of her overalls and Spike was standing there waiting for her to say something or do something... anything. They looked at each other and Willow opened her mouth to say something but shut it quickly.
"What's the matter pet?" Spike asked softly.
"N-nothing."
"Doesn't sound like nothing."
"Well, um... Could you um... excuse me, I mean school tomorrow, kind of need to take, take a shower... I'd... I'd like some privacy."
"Sure thing pet. All ya had to do was ask." Spike said as he turned and walked out into the hall.
"Th-thank you Spike."
"You live here luv, not me." He shrugged as he began walking down the stairs... Willow sat down on her bed, trembling as she listened to his boots weigh heavily on the stairs. The footfalls got further and further, signifying that he was indeed on the first floor of the house. She imagined that he was walking around surveying the territory. Getting a feel for his surroundings. She got up and shut her door, locking it to be sure and started to strip. She went into her bathroom and turned on the water and then she stepped in once the water was the right temperature.
**
Spike sat down on the couch in the living room and listened to the sound of water running. He imagined what the shy little red head looked like all naked and what with all the water running over that milky pale skin. He groaned inwardly. He needed to stop thinking about her, else he was likely to make a big mistake. He picked up the remote and turned on the telly. The day time Emmy's were on. God, he hoped that Passions won an award. That was a bloody good show. In the background, he could still hear Red's shower water running and again his thoughts turned to how she must look naked, and wet and once again he groaned. He cursed himself. He should not be thinking about the slayer's best friend like that. It was liable to get him a stake through the heart and he didn't want that.
**
Willow came out of the shower in her fluffy robe. She put on her least childish and least revealing pajamas. Blue terry pants and a matching tank top. She put a top on over the tank top so that Spike would have no way to get any funny ideas. She looked in the mirror and shrugged. "Oh well, this is going to have to work, I don't want him making fun of my more.... Immature sleeping attire." She sighed and turned to go out of the room.
**
Spike heard the soft sound of Willow's footfalls on the stairs and the breath that he didn't need to take caught in his throat. He calmed himself and went back to watching the daytime Emmy's. So far Passions had been nominated twice and hadn't won yet, but there was still an hour and a half's worth of awards left so they still had time. If they didn't win, Spike thought about going out there to Hollywood and ripping out the throats of a few of those academy members. He grinned wickedly to himself at the thought of all that blood...pouring down his throat... Then he winced as the chip in his head kicked in.
"Bloody hell that hurts!" He growled. Willow jumped back startled.
"W-what ha-happened Spike?"
"Just thought about ripping out the throat of some Passions critics is all... Guess I got a little too into it for the chip's liking." He said, his voice flat.
"O-oh... A-are you all right then?"
"A little headache but other than that, I'm as undead as usual." He laughed, but the sound was totally lack luster. Spike looked back to her and groaned inwardly... The fuzzy little blue number she had on was downright tempting...
"Th-that's good... I'm, I'm glad you're all right then. Whatcha watching?"
"Daytime Emmy's. Hoping Passions wins something, bloody good show that." He said with conviction. Willow smiled despite herself.
"I didn't know that you liked soap operas." Willow said as she came around the couch to sit down beside Spike. Well not right next to him, but on the same piece of furniture that he was on.
"Yeah well, the Watcher had a telly in the basement and I got bored so I'd watch it... Found this show Passions, and it was bloody well all right...funny too. So yeah, big bad ole Spike has a soft spot for shows on the telly." He said growling playfully. Willow couldn't help but giggle. It was almost like this wasn't Spike at all, but some dashing young British exchange student that was a little rough around the edges but underneath it all was soft, kind and... and Oh God... she did not just think that about... Spike... ewww... Goddess no... She had to stop and she had to stop soon. This, this was - was Spike for crying out loud. She shuddered.
"Cold luv?" Spike asked.
"Umm... Yeah, a little." She said weakly, coming back to reality. Spike shrugged out of his leather duster and put it around her shoulders. Willow didn't know what to do or to say, so she just sat there dumbfounded.
"Ummm... uh... thanks." She said nervously. She looked at Spike and her breath caught in her throat... His black t-shirt clung to his chiseled body all too well. Spike looked at her innocently and shrugged.
"Just because I'm a vampire Red, doesn't mean that I don't know how to treat a lady." He said nonchalantly. Willow was amazed, she didn't know what to say.
"Y-you think of me a-as a - a lady?"
"Well, yeah... And why shouldn't I?"
"I-I don't know... Umm... I just... oh...grrr."
"What' the matter luv?"
"Nothing, it's just that... no, no one has ever called me a - a lady before." Willow replied, looking down and a blush coming over her freckled porcelain skin. Spike looked at her, his eyes soft...
"Well then none of these blokes know what's before 'em." Spike said, his voice almost a whisper like he didn't realize that he was speaking out loud. Willow looked at Spike, her eyes startled... like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. Spike looked away, if he didn't look away, he might kiss the girl, and if he did that, God only knew what would happen then. Willow looked at Spike trying to figure him out. Then she looked at the clock on top of the television. She stood and shrugged out of the heavy leather duster holding it out to him, her hand shaking.
"Well... um, thanks but... school tomorrow... I- I should go to, to bed now. Will - will you be all right? D-do you need anything?" She said her voice trembling as slightly as her lower lip was, but she knew that Spike would be able to tell. He looked at her, head cocked ever so slightly to one side.
"Oh, I don't think that your house is going to hurt me luv. Though, there will be a little problem tomorrow." He said as if he didn't want to admit there was anything wrong.
"W-what?" She asked. Spike reached out for his duster, his hand brushed hers ever so softly, her warm skin searing his cold hand as if branding it. Willow jumped at the shock of cold and the softness of the touch. She slowly pulled back her hand, trying desperately to not recoil as if she had been bitten by a snake.
"Well, luv I am a vampire, and with this bloody chip in my head I can't very well go out and hunt, now can I? And since my crypt fell all to bloody pieces and all my stuff got crushed, I'm going to need some blood. I'd go out and get it myself, but then if you're not here when I get back, or the door is locked something bad could happen... I mean I wouldn't want to have to go back Giles' place and face him and the Slayer again. I don't think that I'd fare so well the next time." He said, keeping his voice soft, trying not to get harsh. Trying to be the poet he had once been instead of the vampire he had become. He didn't want to scare the one that had been so kind as to invite him into her home knowing full well what she could be getting herself into. But that was just the point, she didn't really know what she could be getting herself into. She didn't know how he really saw her, had started seeing her. She didn't know how hard it was for him to sit there and not reach out and stroke her hair, her face... He groaned inwardly, trying to keep silent so that she wouldn't know.
"Um...well... I-I could give, give you a - a spare key. Or, or I c-could go t-to the slaughterhouse I guess. I - I mean isn't that, that what Buffy did for Angel?" She said obviously not really comfortable with either thought.
"You don't have to luv. I mean, we could make other arrangements."
"Not really Spike, the slaughterhouse closes before the sun goes down tomorrow, something about problems with employees. " She sighed.
"That's odd. Maybe you should have the Slayer look into it, sounds to me like there's something strange going on down there."
"Why do you say that Spike?"
"Well it just sounds like someone is getting a bit paranoid. But then again, I am a vampire so to me when a business starts closing its doors before sunset it tells me that someone is onto the vamps in the scene or is getting paranoid that we're lurking about whether they believe in us or not."
"Oh... Well, what are we going to do?"
"Since you said they're closing, you might have to go luv... But if you don't want to I'll try to think of something else... Maybe I'll sneak into a blood bank or something." He said with a devilish grin.
"No! No... I * Sigh * I'll think of something. There, there will be no law breaking while you're here." Willow said obviously still stuck on the thought of having to go get blood from a slaughterhouse.
"You alright luv? You sound a little off about all this."
"It's just that blood... * shudder * and I don't know how I'm supposed to go about getting blood from them, I mean isn't that going to sound more than a bit odd?" Willow said her voice stressed and her posture shaky.
"Hmm. I've never really thought about it like that Red. I guess since I'm a vampire it just doesn't bother me. You could ask the Slayer though I highly doubt that she'll be too keen on the fact that you opened your home to me. That could be bad. The only other thing I can think of is that you leave it up to me and whatever I do, I won't leave a trail that can be traced and I won't tell you how I did it either. I know that isn't comforting, but it's the best I can do." He said, his voice getting a little harsh.
"I - I'll - I'll sleep on it. Umm if there isn't blood in the fridge for you then you'll have to figure something out, because I've obviously chickened out. Not exactly famous for my courage..." She said with a nervous little laugh. She turned to walk away but Spike caught her wrist, careful to catch fabric and not bare skin after the way she'd nearly jumped the last time he'd touched her. When she turned to look at him, her eyes were wide and very confused almost scared.
"You forgot to say goodnight luv." He said with a laugh. He held himself almost rigid while he awaited her response, the urge to take the little red head into his arms and kiss away her fear so close to the surface.
"Umm goodnight, Spike." She said her voice shaky.
"Goodnight Willow." He said as he brought her hand up to his lips and kissed it gently letting her hand slide from his. By the time he looked up she was on the stairs and on her way to her room. He could hear her heart racing and her breath shake. When he was sure she was out of earshot, he cursed himself.
"Bloody good one there Spike. Scared her right out of the room. Never should have done that... what was I thinking?" He muttered as he turned off the telly and went towards the basement. He wasn't going to go to sleep, but he wasn't going to stay where the scent of her fear was still overwhelming either.
**
Willow ran to her room and shut the door behind her leaning against it. What had just happened down there? It was her imagination... right?
"Oh Goddess please, please just let this be my mind playing cruel tricks on me." Willow said to herself. That couldn't have happened. Spike, Spike wasn't capable of ... Oh Goddess what was going on? Willow locked her door and slowly walked over to her bed. She kicked off her slippers and her pajama pants and shrugged off the little over shirt she had put on. She was suddenly very, very warm - too warm. She walked around to the side of her bed and turned the covers down. She sat down and just stared at the floor for a moment as the evening's odd events washed over her. She was going to just have to put it all to the back of her mind if she was going to get any sleep tonight. She kicked her legs up onto the bed as she turned to lie down. She pulled her covers up to her waist still too warm and turned off her bedside lamp.
It was a long time before Willow could fall asleep. She lay there, tossing and turning and thinking of what had happened. Her hand tingled every time she thought about it. Spike's cool lips had ghosted over the top of her hand ever so lightly, so gently. Something she didn't know a vampire without a soul could be - soft or gentle. She wondered how Spike had treated Druscilla during their century together. Was he soft and gentle with her? Or was he brash and animalistic with her because they were both vampires? She had to stop thinking about him... If she kept it up one of two things would happen... One, it would drive her absolutely insane or two... She would fall for him. Either was insanity, wasn't it. I mean to fall for a soulless vampire. Though Buffy had still cared for Angel even after he had returned to being Angelus again. She had known that it wasn't Angel, but part of her had hoped and had wished that he would be. Buffy wasn't crazy was she? I mean at least Spike had that chip in his head that prevented him from hurting anyone and anything other than demons, it was as good as a soul right? But it wasn't as permanent as one. Though as the gypsies had proven a soul could be lost and gained very easily. Why was she even considering these things? It wasn't like she actually liked Spike. It was just that he was the only one being nice to her right now and... She wouldn't think about it, shouldn't think about it. If she continued to dwell on it then there was only one explanation left... She was starting to fall for Spike and that simply wasn't the case so she would stop thinking and go to bed.... Simple as that.
Willow welcomed Spike into her parent's modest two-story house. She felt a little awkward when she invited the vampire in, now this meant that he could drop by any time he wanted. That disturbed her just a little bit. She gave him a tour, starting with the first floor, going to the basement, and ending with the top floor and her room...
"This room is off limits to you Spike." Willow said sternly.
"Why pet?"
"B-because it is my room. There will be no coming in here without my permission do you understand?"
"What if I hear you screaming in the middle of the night?" he said with a half smile dancing across his lips.
"You better have good reason for coming in here or I'll stake you myself."
"Come on pet, I wouldn't hurt you."
"See this, resolve face. So you better just stay away from here unless I say otherwise...you wouldn't want to go back to Giles' place, would you?"
"Now, Red, that wasn't nice, what playing that card like that and all."
"Sorry it's just that I have this thing about privacy...and I don't want you disturbing that...I mean...it's awkward for me to have a guy staying here, let a lone a vampire..." Willow stammered...
"You mean to tell me that dogboy never stayed over?"
"No, Oz never stayed over here...he wasn't allowed."
"You're parents are hardly here luv...You could have had him here and no one would know."
"I would know...and it just didn't seem right. Besides, Oz wasn't comfortable with it either...." Willow said, her lower lip quivering just a little. Hell how it got to him when she did that. Spike wondered if Willow even had so much as a clue as to how he felt about her, he doubted it, but he wondered.
"If it bothers you that much, then fine...I'll stay wherever you put me Red."
"Thank you. Since the basement is the darkest place in this house, you'll have to stay there. But I think that it'll be a bit more comfy than Giles'. I mean, we have a couch and tv and all kinds of stuff down there, just don't break anything, my parents would have a fit."
"Sure thing luv." Spike said nonchalantly. There was a long awkward moment. Willow had her hands jammed in the pockets of her overalls and Spike was standing there waiting for her to say something or do something... anything. They looked at each other and Willow opened her mouth to say something but shut it quickly.
"What's the matter pet?" Spike asked softly.
"N-nothing."
"Doesn't sound like nothing."
"Well, um... Could you um... excuse me, I mean school tomorrow, kind of need to take, take a shower... I'd... I'd like some privacy."
"Sure thing pet. All ya had to do was ask." Spike said as he turned and walked out into the hall.
"Th-thank you Spike."
"You live here luv, not me." He shrugged as he began walking down the stairs... Willow sat down on her bed, trembling as she listened to his boots weigh heavily on the stairs. The footfalls got further and further, signifying that he was indeed on the first floor of the house. She imagined that he was walking around surveying the territory. Getting a feel for his surroundings. She got up and shut her door, locking it to be sure and started to strip. She went into her bathroom and turned on the water and then she stepped in once the water was the right temperature.
**
Spike sat down on the couch in the living room and listened to the sound of water running. He imagined what the shy little red head looked like all naked and what with all the water running over that milky pale skin. He groaned inwardly. He needed to stop thinking about her, else he was likely to make a big mistake. He picked up the remote and turned on the telly. The day time Emmy's were on. God, he hoped that Passions won an award. That was a bloody good show. In the background, he could still hear Red's shower water running and again his thoughts turned to how she must look naked, and wet and once again he groaned. He cursed himself. He should not be thinking about the slayer's best friend like that. It was liable to get him a stake through the heart and he didn't want that.
**
Willow came out of the shower in her fluffy robe. She put on her least childish and least revealing pajamas. Blue terry pants and a matching tank top. She put a top on over the tank top so that Spike would have no way to get any funny ideas. She looked in the mirror and shrugged. "Oh well, this is going to have to work, I don't want him making fun of my more.... Immature sleeping attire." She sighed and turned to go out of the room.
**
Spike heard the soft sound of Willow's footfalls on the stairs and the breath that he didn't need to take caught in his throat. He calmed himself and went back to watching the daytime Emmy's. So far Passions had been nominated twice and hadn't won yet, but there was still an hour and a half's worth of awards left so they still had time. If they didn't win, Spike thought about going out there to Hollywood and ripping out the throats of a few of those academy members. He grinned wickedly to himself at the thought of all that blood...pouring down his throat... Then he winced as the chip in his head kicked in.
"Bloody hell that hurts!" He growled. Willow jumped back startled.
"W-what ha-happened Spike?"
"Just thought about ripping out the throat of some Passions critics is all... Guess I got a little too into it for the chip's liking." He said, his voice flat.
"O-oh... A-are you all right then?"
"A little headache but other than that, I'm as undead as usual." He laughed, but the sound was totally lack luster. Spike looked back to her and groaned inwardly... The fuzzy little blue number she had on was downright tempting...
"Th-that's good... I'm, I'm glad you're all right then. Whatcha watching?"
"Daytime Emmy's. Hoping Passions wins something, bloody good show that." He said with conviction. Willow smiled despite herself.
"I didn't know that you liked soap operas." Willow said as she came around the couch to sit down beside Spike. Well not right next to him, but on the same piece of furniture that he was on.
"Yeah well, the Watcher had a telly in the basement and I got bored so I'd watch it... Found this show Passions, and it was bloody well all right...funny too. So yeah, big bad ole Spike has a soft spot for shows on the telly." He said growling playfully. Willow couldn't help but giggle. It was almost like this wasn't Spike at all, but some dashing young British exchange student that was a little rough around the edges but underneath it all was soft, kind and... and Oh God... she did not just think that about... Spike... ewww... Goddess no... She had to stop and she had to stop soon. This, this was - was Spike for crying out loud. She shuddered.
"Cold luv?" Spike asked.
"Umm... Yeah, a little." She said weakly, coming back to reality. Spike shrugged out of his leather duster and put it around her shoulders. Willow didn't know what to do or to say, so she just sat there dumbfounded.
"Ummm... uh... thanks." She said nervously. She looked at Spike and her breath caught in her throat... His black t-shirt clung to his chiseled body all too well. Spike looked at her innocently and shrugged.
"Just because I'm a vampire Red, doesn't mean that I don't know how to treat a lady." He said nonchalantly. Willow was amazed, she didn't know what to say.
"Y-you think of me a-as a - a lady?"
"Well, yeah... And why shouldn't I?"
"I-I don't know... Umm... I just... oh...grrr."
"What' the matter luv?"
"Nothing, it's just that... no, no one has ever called me a - a lady before." Willow replied, looking down and a blush coming over her freckled porcelain skin. Spike looked at her, his eyes soft...
"Well then none of these blokes know what's before 'em." Spike said, his voice almost a whisper like he didn't realize that he was speaking out loud. Willow looked at Spike, her eyes startled... like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. Spike looked away, if he didn't look away, he might kiss the girl, and if he did that, God only knew what would happen then. Willow looked at Spike trying to figure him out. Then she looked at the clock on top of the television. She stood and shrugged out of the heavy leather duster holding it out to him, her hand shaking.
"Well... um, thanks but... school tomorrow... I- I should go to, to bed now. Will - will you be all right? D-do you need anything?" She said her voice trembling as slightly as her lower lip was, but she knew that Spike would be able to tell. He looked at her, head cocked ever so slightly to one side.
"Oh, I don't think that your house is going to hurt me luv. Though, there will be a little problem tomorrow." He said as if he didn't want to admit there was anything wrong.
"W-what?" She asked. Spike reached out for his duster, his hand brushed hers ever so softly, her warm skin searing his cold hand as if branding it. Willow jumped at the shock of cold and the softness of the touch. She slowly pulled back her hand, trying desperately to not recoil as if she had been bitten by a snake.
"Well, luv I am a vampire, and with this bloody chip in my head I can't very well go out and hunt, now can I? And since my crypt fell all to bloody pieces and all my stuff got crushed, I'm going to need some blood. I'd go out and get it myself, but then if you're not here when I get back, or the door is locked something bad could happen... I mean I wouldn't want to have to go back Giles' place and face him and the Slayer again. I don't think that I'd fare so well the next time." He said, keeping his voice soft, trying not to get harsh. Trying to be the poet he had once been instead of the vampire he had become. He didn't want to scare the one that had been so kind as to invite him into her home knowing full well what she could be getting herself into. But that was just the point, she didn't really know what she could be getting herself into. She didn't know how he really saw her, had started seeing her. She didn't know how hard it was for him to sit there and not reach out and stroke her hair, her face... He groaned inwardly, trying to keep silent so that she wouldn't know.
"Um...well... I-I could give, give you a - a spare key. Or, or I c-could go t-to the slaughterhouse I guess. I - I mean isn't that, that what Buffy did for Angel?" She said obviously not really comfortable with either thought.
"You don't have to luv. I mean, we could make other arrangements."
"Not really Spike, the slaughterhouse closes before the sun goes down tomorrow, something about problems with employees. " She sighed.
"That's odd. Maybe you should have the Slayer look into it, sounds to me like there's something strange going on down there."
"Why do you say that Spike?"
"Well it just sounds like someone is getting a bit paranoid. But then again, I am a vampire so to me when a business starts closing its doors before sunset it tells me that someone is onto the vamps in the scene or is getting paranoid that we're lurking about whether they believe in us or not."
"Oh... Well, what are we going to do?"
"Since you said they're closing, you might have to go luv... But if you don't want to I'll try to think of something else... Maybe I'll sneak into a blood bank or something." He said with a devilish grin.
"No! No... I * Sigh * I'll think of something. There, there will be no law breaking while you're here." Willow said obviously still stuck on the thought of having to go get blood from a slaughterhouse.
"You alright luv? You sound a little off about all this."
"It's just that blood... * shudder * and I don't know how I'm supposed to go about getting blood from them, I mean isn't that going to sound more than a bit odd?" Willow said her voice stressed and her posture shaky.
"Hmm. I've never really thought about it like that Red. I guess since I'm a vampire it just doesn't bother me. You could ask the Slayer though I highly doubt that she'll be too keen on the fact that you opened your home to me. That could be bad. The only other thing I can think of is that you leave it up to me and whatever I do, I won't leave a trail that can be traced and I won't tell you how I did it either. I know that isn't comforting, but it's the best I can do." He said, his voice getting a little harsh.
"I - I'll - I'll sleep on it. Umm if there isn't blood in the fridge for you then you'll have to figure something out, because I've obviously chickened out. Not exactly famous for my courage..." She said with a nervous little laugh. She turned to walk away but Spike caught her wrist, careful to catch fabric and not bare skin after the way she'd nearly jumped the last time he'd touched her. When she turned to look at him, her eyes were wide and very confused almost scared.
"You forgot to say goodnight luv." He said with a laugh. He held himself almost rigid while he awaited her response, the urge to take the little red head into his arms and kiss away her fear so close to the surface.
"Umm goodnight, Spike." She said her voice shaky.
"Goodnight Willow." He said as he brought her hand up to his lips and kissed it gently letting her hand slide from his. By the time he looked up she was on the stairs and on her way to her room. He could hear her heart racing and her breath shake. When he was sure she was out of earshot, he cursed himself.
"Bloody good one there Spike. Scared her right out of the room. Never should have done that... what was I thinking?" He muttered as he turned off the telly and went towards the basement. He wasn't going to go to sleep, but he wasn't going to stay where the scent of her fear was still overwhelming either.
**
Willow ran to her room and shut the door behind her leaning against it. What had just happened down there? It was her imagination... right?
"Oh Goddess please, please just let this be my mind playing cruel tricks on me." Willow said to herself. That couldn't have happened. Spike, Spike wasn't capable of ... Oh Goddess what was going on? Willow locked her door and slowly walked over to her bed. She kicked off her slippers and her pajama pants and shrugged off the little over shirt she had put on. She was suddenly very, very warm - too warm. She walked around to the side of her bed and turned the covers down. She sat down and just stared at the floor for a moment as the evening's odd events washed over her. She was going to just have to put it all to the back of her mind if she was going to get any sleep tonight. She kicked her legs up onto the bed as she turned to lie down. She pulled her covers up to her waist still too warm and turned off her bedside lamp.
It was a long time before Willow could fall asleep. She lay there, tossing and turning and thinking of what had happened. Her hand tingled every time she thought about it. Spike's cool lips had ghosted over the top of her hand ever so lightly, so gently. Something she didn't know a vampire without a soul could be - soft or gentle. She wondered how Spike had treated Druscilla during their century together. Was he soft and gentle with her? Or was he brash and animalistic with her because they were both vampires? She had to stop thinking about him... If she kept it up one of two things would happen... One, it would drive her absolutely insane or two... She would fall for him. Either was insanity, wasn't it. I mean to fall for a soulless vampire. Though Buffy had still cared for Angel even after he had returned to being Angelus again. She had known that it wasn't Angel, but part of her had hoped and had wished that he would be. Buffy wasn't crazy was she? I mean at least Spike had that chip in his head that prevented him from hurting anyone and anything other than demons, it was as good as a soul right? But it wasn't as permanent as one. Though as the gypsies had proven a soul could be lost and gained very easily. Why was she even considering these things? It wasn't like she actually liked Spike. It was just that he was the only one being nice to her right now and... She wouldn't think about it, shouldn't think about it. If she continued to dwell on it then there was only one explanation left... She was starting to fall for Spike and that simply wasn't the case so she would stop thinking and go to bed.... Simple as that.