part 2
~duo~
The sunlight finally pried my eyes open. I looked down at the little bundle I held in my arms. /Heero.../ I was surprised that he wasn't awake already, but I happily found that if I loosened my arms and shifted a bit, I could watch his beautiful face as he slept. I was still amazed that he was even there. /How did this happen again, love? What strange destiny brought you to me last night?/ I knew he'd awakened during the night and I once felt him move against me. I'd slackened my hold on him just a little.. kind of a test, to see if he would leave. I really didn't want him to, but I knew that to try to keep him against his will was.. well.. a suicide mission. So I let go a little.. if he moved away from me, I'd unclasp my arms completely. /But he's still here./ A little while later I'd felt his hand on my cheek, gently wiping away my tears. I'd nearly cried at his soft touch, so full of caring. I hadn't wanted him to know I'd been crying, but he knew now. Too bad I could never tell him why.
~heero~
I was lying in his arms, pressed tightly against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. /This.. this is the steady rhythm that keeps me going. As long as this sound continues, my life shall be complete./ I wasn't asleep, though I knew he thought I was. I'd been awake for the past two hours, content to just listen to the pounding behind his ribs. Suddenly I felt him move away from me. I nearly panicked, but soon realised he hadn't left me. I listened to his soft breathing now, since he'd moved so that my head was no longer resting on his chest. He lay like that for awhile, watching me I think... I tried to remain in my seemingly unconscious state, but I couldn't take it anymore. He was awake now. I had to see him in the daylight. I quickly opened my eyes. I was right, he had thought I was asleep, for my sudden gaze startled him. He jumped a little and his perfect lips formed a tiny pout as a whispered 'oh!' escaped them. "Good morning, Duo" I said.. nearly calling him 'my angel. /I can't call him that out loud.. he'd laugh himself into a coma if I did../
He didn't say a word, but his colbalt blue eyes bored into mine as we lay there in the silence. I didn't know what to say. I remembered falling asleep with him, but I couldn't remember why. /Oh god.. please don't let this be a mistake./ I wistfully remembered a night not too long before when he'd come home after having just a little too much to drink. That night I'd sat next to him as he slept, making sure he would be okay. He cried then too, and I wanted to take him in my arms and comfort him. But I didn't. /Please don't let that be what happened last night./ I hoped with all my heart that he had wanted me there. /Why is he staring at me like that? Is he wondering why I'm here?/
~duo~
His eyes flew open and suddenly those prussian blue pools were staring at me. "Good morning" I think he said, but truthfully I wasn't paying attention. I tried to hide it, but I just knew all the thoughts I'd been having, and all my feelings were being relayed to him through my wide open eyes. I didn't know what to say to him, so I just gazed at him. /Oh god, he's so beautiful./ I began to hope he could read my mind and extract the thoughts I so dearly wanted him to know. /I love you, I love you, I love you/ My mind was screaming, but my eyes stayed calm. I watched him and wondered what he was thinking. /Are you thinking about how to get out of this mess, Heero? Are you going to leave me?/ I sighed a little, closing my eyes. Once again I tried my little test. /If I let go now, Heero, will you leave? Or will you cling tighter?/ I hoped with all my heart that he'd stay as I pulled my arms apart.
~heero~
Hn. I supposed he wanted me to leave, since he closed his eyes in disgust and completely let go of me. /Argh Duo.. please don't do this to me./ I watched his face for awhile.. His eyes opened and he looked at me again, but he made no move to reclaim me in his embrace. My eyes quickly scanned his face. I couldn't find a thing. /I guess you really don't want me then, huh?/ I could feel my cheeks begin to burn as the water formed at the corners of my eyes. I quickly moved away from him, turned and left the bed. I blindly, but speedily made my way to the bathroom just as the tears began to fall.
/He can't see me cry.. not now that I know... he doesn't care./ I turned the shower on and quickly threw my shorts off as the tears rolled down my face, unaccompanied by any sound.
/Then what the hell was that about Duo??/ I stepped into the shower and let it run over me as I cursed him in my mind.