By Donkey Kong Song
Once upon a time, Banjo and Kazooie were reading
a newspaper when Poof! The Sharkfood Island Egg appeared in their hands.
And Poof! The Ice Key did too. In the newspaper, they saw a map of the
place with a treasure chest. "Let's go look inside the treasure chest!"
suggested Banjo. They went to the place, and Tooty went with them.
There was a pink target on the wall. Kazooie threw
the egg at it. A door opened. Inside, there was another door, with a lock
and a number 10. The Ice Key opened it. Inside there was another door with
a 9. The Ice Key unlocked that. Then from 8 to 1 (like in Mystery Science
Theater 3000), until they found a huge treasure chest! "Maybe it has lots
of treasure in it," Kazooie said.
They opened it. It played the same music when you
open a big chest in Zelda: Ocarina of Time, and the yellow stuff came out.
But inside it appeared to be... nothing! But it was big enough for all
three of them to fit inside. So they went inside and the chest closed while
they were inside. Banjo yelled, "GYU-HUCK!!!!!!"
A voice said, "Be quiet, Mumbo want quiet."
"H-Who said that?" asked Tooty, a little scared.
"It Mumbo, you idiots," Mumbo Jumbo replied. He
had a flashlight to see in the dark.
So they went until they saw a note that said, "Ha!
You don't get ANYTHING! Signed, Megaman."
Klungo was also in the treasure chest and said,
"Bearssssssss and bird hasssssssssss found Megaman'sssssssssssss treasure,
Klungo mussssssssssst warn him!" Klungo was Megaman's helper.
So then Banjo, Kazooie, Mumbo, and Tooty met up
with DKS (me). I said, "Hey, dudes! Did you know about the Curse of the
Golden Banana?" and I danced around singing, "The Curse of the Golden Banana,
the Curse of the Golden Banana, the Curse of the... OW!"
Mumbo bonked me on the head with his stick. "Thanks
Mumbo," Banjo said.
"Anyway, I found someone you like, but they call
me I.C. Wiener for some reason."
I led them out of the treasure chest, and into Goemon's
Imperial Pizza Hut. "Hey, is one of you I.C. Wiener?" asked Goemon.
"Well, if that's pizza, then I'm I.C. Whatever!"
said Banjo.
"Then sign the paper," said Goemon. Banjo signed
it.
"Ummmmm...... this says Banjo Hunnybear."
"Oops!" said Banjo. He erased it and signed it again.
"This says Bill Clinton," said Goemon.
Banjo erased and kept writing different stuff: Al
Gore, Long John Silver, Jimmy Hoffa, Tuxedo Mask, Bob Dole, Ross Perot,
VooDoo Sham Pooh, Mark Miller, but then Mumbo just turned Banjo into a
trout and signed I.C. Wiener.
"That'll be $50!" said Goemon. Mumbo screamed.
"Well, I have $50 but I can't pay because I'm a
trout. You have to turn me into a bear again before I can pay."
Mumbo turned Banjo into a bear then he paid, and
gave them the pizza and said, "Haha! It only costs $12 for real. Bwahahahahah!"
Then he went into Impact and flew away. "Hey, Impact
can't fly!" said Mumbo. Impact fell to the ground and broke apart with
Goemon still in him.
"OK, OK, you can have Ebisumaru!" "What?" said Ebisumaru,
in the middle of the broken remains of Impact.
"Uh, we don't want Ebisumaru," said Banjo.
"He can help you fight Megaman!" said Goemon.
Banjo said, "How did you know about this? You kissed
my girlfriend, didn't you!" "Um, I.C. Wiener, you don't have a girlriend,"
said Goemon.
"Oh, yeah," said Banjo.
"What about me?" asked Kazooie.
"Hell no!" said Banjo, "and I'm not I.C. Wiener!
He's I.C. Wiener!" he said, pointing to Mumbo Jumbo.
"Mumbo not I.C. Wiener, she's I.C. Wiener!" said
Mumbo, pointing to Tooty.
"I'm I.C. Weiner!" she said.
"Well, whoever you are, Ebisumaru will help you
fight Megaman!"
"We'll take him. How much?" said Banjo.
"$50," said Goemon.
"Hey, you said he free!" said Mumbo.
"Want me to go with you?" said Goemon.
"Sure, how much for you?" asked Banjo.
"$50," said Goemon.
"Hey, shut up!" said Mumbo.
Goemon said, "OK, I don't care!"
All 6 of them set off to find Megaman. On the way,
they met Quatre. He said, "Hey, what are you six doing?" "We're finding
Megaman, because he's a Sonian and took the treasure from the place!" said
Goemon.
Quatre said, "Oh yeah, can I come?"
"Sure, I... wait a mnute, isn't your girlfriend
a Sonian?"
Quatre blushed. "Yes," he said.
Banjo said, "Doesn't that mean she's on Megaman's
side?"
"No, we've been married for two years," said Quatre.
"You married a Sonian?" asked Banjo. "Oh my God!!!!"
"That's OK, I love her, and she loves me. She wouldn't
do anything bad!" said Quatre.
Banjo said, "OK, you're free to come!"
"Hey, are you I.C. Wiener?" asked Goemon.
"No, I'm Q.R. Winner," replied Quatre.
"I said, I'm I.C. Wiener," said Tooty. "HeyQuatredoyouliketojumpjumpingisfunandIliketojumpandjumpandjumpandjumpandjumpandjumpand
OW!!"
Banjo smacked Tooty across the face. "Thanks Banjo,"
said Quatre.
"My brain fell out again," said Tooty. "Open your
mouth and close your eyes and you will get a big surprise!" said Banjo.
Tooty opened her mouth, and closed her eyes. Banjo gave her a knuckle sandwich.
It knocked her teeth out. "My teeth fell out," said Tooty. She was picking
them up one by one when she notice Quatre had teeth.
"Hey you have teeth!" said Tooty. She kissed him
and Yuffie popped up and kicked Tooty.
Banjo ran after her and said, "Open your mouth and
close your eyes and you will get a big surprise!" She opened her mouth
and Banjo dropped in brain medicine and but her brain back in her head.
Tooty thought for a minute about what she just did and said, "Oh my God,
what have I done? Banjo, I'm sorry for all that trouble that I caused!"
"Don't worry Tooty, it's not your fault, it was
your brain! It was making you act crazy, but a single piece of brain medicine
cures brain problems. Now let's go on!"
They went on, and on the way, Mumbo threw the flashlight
into a dumpster. "Ummm, Skull Boy, wer you sure we wouldn't need that later?"
asked Kazooie.
"Mumbo psychic, knows what's next!" said Mumbo.
"Ummm, where's DKS?" asked Banjo.
"He went away, becuase he thinks we keep calling
him I.C. Wiener." Tooty didn't say anything about her being I.C. Wiener.
As they traveled, Goemon paid Ryo to sleep at The
Rainbow Cloud Hotel. They new they'd need their rest for Megaman.
When they woke up, the owner, Baby Myuu, warned
them about Megaman, but they already knew and were going to fight him,
so Baby Myuu joined up. Baby Myuu said, "Then I'll call Mewtwo to come
with us!" He was at a football game.
"Myuu, I'm in the middle of a football game," said
Mewtwo.
"But what about Megaman?" asked Baby Myuu.
"He can kiss my ass," said Mewtwo. "But he can destroy
the football game!" said Baby Myuu. She was trying to get Mewtwo to believe
it's serious. "Oh, then I'm going!" he said.
He teleported to the hotel, but he was still wearing
a football uniform. He took it off and they all went, meeting Nintendonians
the way.
There was Earthworm Jim and Peter Puppy, who just
found out what was wrong with the universe. And the Snowboard Kids, whose
racetracks would be destroyed. The cast of Diddy Kong Racing, because Megaman
is stronger that WizPig. Link, who realized the villian is worse than Ganon.
Gex, who found out that Megaman was left after Rez's death. The rest of
the popular Mario cast, because they were bored. Ash. who felt like he
was going to suceed fighting himself for the first time. Genki, who was
the so-called "Champ".
A little later, they got ready to RUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!
They were on a battleground surrounded by ropes (like wresting). The announcer
was Wu Fei. "Hello everyone, I am the announcer, Wu Fei! (applause sign
goes down and no one claps) C'mon, clap! (really deep and evily) CLAP!
Anyway, this is a 1 against 37 battle, but the one is really strong. The
first one, the one who stole the treasure from the giant treasure chest
in the place, MEGAMAN!!!!!!!" Megaman comes in with Klungo. "Yesssssssss,
masssssssssssster!" said Klungo. Wu Fei talked again. "And the ones who
were trying to get Megaman for that, THIRTY-SEVEN NINTENDONIANS!!!!!!!!"
(Yes, that's right, I counted them.)
The Nintendonians had a plan. They could surround
Megaman and the ones at front would distract him while the ones behind
attack (and from the sides.) But the division didn't go well. 4 sides,
37 Nintendonians. 37 divided by 4 = 9 r1. They could do 9 on each side
of him, while Mumbo Jumbo does spells on him when he needs to. Wu Fei said,
"3, 2, 1, GO!!!!!!" Banjo, Kazooie, Tooty, Link, Gex, Ash, Genki, Mewtwo,
Goemon, and Ebisumaru were in front of him.. Eartworm Jim, Peter Puppy,
T.T., Drumstick, Pipsy, Krunch, Diddy, Conker, and Tiptup were at his left
side. Mario, Luigi, Peach, Yoshi, Wario, Toad, Quatre and Baby Myuu were
at his right side. Slash, Shinobin, Linda, Wendy, Tommy, Jam, Damien, Trick,
and Mr. Dog were behind him. The ones in front of him said,
"Come and get us! We're the ones you want!" Megaman
wanted to attack them but before he could, Mario and Luigi threw fireballs
at him. He then stopped paying attention to them and turned to Mario's
side. Again he tried to attack them, but he turned into a snowman. The
Snowboard Kids shot him with the snowman missile! Now they went up and
attacked him the best they could. But they forgot about him unfreezing,
so they were all knocked out of the ring with a blast of snow. When Wu
Fei wasn't looking, they climbed back in. with a blast of snow. Megaman
face the Snowboard Kids, but Mumbo turned him into a trout.
They went in and did their best, and remembered
to back off when the spell wears off. Baby Myuu went out and tagged Mumbo.
He went in, and she floated above Megaman. Toad sent out Goombas to attack,
although they could easily be elimintated. But when he got hit with a parachute
(by Slash), Baby Myuu used a Tail Bounce to bash him back down. Gex said,
"Hey, that's my attack!" "Can you fly?" asked Baby Myuu. "You didn't need
to add more to it!" said Gex. He cried. "Oh look, you made Gex cry!" said
Banjo.
"Well, I've got my own army!" said Megaman. It consisted
of evil chickens. Banjo still had the newspaper. He tore it up and said,
"Stupid newspaper! This is all your fault!" He threw it out into the crowd.
Before anyone gets a chance to attack, the evil chickens knock them over.
After a while, Jinjo statues pop up. "Jinjos come to help our friends!"
The chickens just stood there scared. The Nintendonians didn't activate
the statues. They just looked straight into Megaman's eyes. "Let's end
this battle!" said Megaman. "I will be rejoining the Nintendo business!"
They then activated the Jinjo statues, and all of them formed a circle
and sang, "Good morning starshine, the Earth says Hello, you twinkle above
us, we twinkle below!" "Did ththththththththththissssssssssssss fanfic
have to have a happy ending?" asked Klungo. No one knew the answer. Megaman
went and put the treasure back into the chest into the place, and tore
up the note. They all shared the treasure.
THE END