"uh, Violet, just what are you doing in there
April Fools

This story is actually partly a true-life event.  In real life this guy I worked with at a horse farm where I was the barn manager, ran into the barn aisle one day, screaming and dripping what looked for all the world like blood.  I knew he had been working in the shop earlier, and I figured he must have cut himself.  I ran over to see what was wrong, and then he just started laughing so hard.  I was about to kick him, when the humor in the situation hit me too, and I started laughing with him.  So, that was the inspiration for this story.  It really wasn't supposed to end the way it does, but it did, and that's what happened. 

"Uh, Violet, just what are you doing in there?"

"Oh, uh, nothing Dad!  I'm just trying to, uh, make dessert."

"Okay, does Mom know you are doing this?"

"Yes, she said it was fine."

"Okay, well, don't set the kitchen on fire or anything, okay?"

"Right Dad, oh, and Gosalyn is coming over to help me in a few minutes."

"OH NO, two of them in there?  I know I should have built that bomb shelter when I had the chance."

Just then, the doorbell rang.  Drake began to get up off the couch to get the door, but before he could even get halfway up, Violet flew past him, colliding with the door with a soft thump.

"I'll get it Dad!"  Violet yelled over he shoulder as she picked herself up off the floor.

"Hey Gos!  Just come on in here with me, and we can get started.  Oh, did you bring the extra, ingredients?"  Violet asked her sister with a mischievous glance at her father.

"Yeah, Violet, they're right here in the bag. 

Hey Dad, how are you and Rose doing?

Has Violet here attempted anymore aerial acrobatics from the bookshelves lately?"

"Hey, it was just that one time, and it seemed like the sheet would have made a great parachute!  Besides, Sunny said it would be a great idea!"

"She did, did she . . ." Gosalyn said with a thoughtful look on her face. 

"Okay you two, I'm going to go and sit on the porch, I want to still have a house when I get back in here.  You know what I'm talking about Gos!"  Drake said, giving his daughters a stern look, quickly followed by one of fear for the decorator bills he was imagining just looking at those two angelic faces. 

" I sure do hope that parental curse works . . ." Drake grumbled to himself as he closed the back door behind him.

"Okay, now he's gone, we can get on with our plans!" Violet whispered happily to Gos.

"Lead on to the kitchen Violet, I can't wait to see the look on his face."  Gos replied with a mischievous smile of her own. 

In the Kitchen

"Okay Gos, I guess we had better at least sound like we're cooking, we don't want him to get suspicious."

"Good point.  I'll go set off the high explosives, and you can go and rev the chainsaw for a few minutes" Gosalyn yelled over her shoulder to Violet as she opened one of the cabinet drawers, only to have all the pots contained therein fall onto the floor with a loud clatter of metal meeting cold tiles. 

"Well, that should probably do it for the sound effects Gos, now all we have to do is get me prepped, and by that time it will have taken long enough to get Dad's attention piqued.  Don't you think?"

"I agree Violet.  Okay, come over here and sit in this chair, and I'll get out the paint.  Here, put this apron on so that you don't get face paint on your clothes.  I'm not sure Rose would appreciate that, and I don't think this stuff would wash out completely to boot"  Gosalyn said to Violet as she rummaged around in the plastic shopping bag, looking for the necessary ingredients for the night's big adventure. 

Violet did as she was told and went over to one of the kitchen chairs and put on her mother's apron.  Once she was dressed, Violet sat down in the chair, legs swinging slightly as they dangled a few inches above the floor.

"Okay Gos, I'm all set.  Ready when you are."

"Operation, Nervous Breakdown, Drake Mallard, is now underway" Gosalyn replied with a suppressed giggle. 

'This is just like when I was a kid with Honker, only he wasn't nearly such a willing compatriot as Violet.  This is going to be great!  I just hope we don't scare Dad too badly; he is getting kind of old.  Oh well, he survived me, so this shouldn't kill him either.'

Half an hour later, Gosalyn looked down at her work.  Violet's arm was now covered in what really looked like realistic blood, from a large, fake gash running from two inches above her wrist, to just an inch below the crook of her elbow.  She has also been liberally spattered with more fake blood, mixed with tomato sauce, along the front of her apron.  Several towels had also been soaking in tomato sauce, and Gosalyn now took those out and wrapped them around Violet's arm.  Overall, Gosalyn was impressed by her handiwork, and felt the impression, if not studied too closely, was rather realistic.  Violet took one look at her tomato sauce and fake blood covered arm and immediately began laughing so hard she almost fell out of her chair. 

"SHHHHH! Violet!  If Dad hears you, he'll know we're up to something.  Okay, now calm down, and get serious. 

"Okay, are you ready?  Lets Get Mischievous!"

Violet and Gosalyn then walked out of the kitchen, Violet still trying hard not to laugh, and Gosalyn trying to figure out what to say to her father. 

Five feet from the door, Gosalyn started hurrying Violet along, making it seem that she was in desperate need of medical attention, the better to set up their father. 

"Dad!  DAD!  Come here, quick!  Violet cut herself with the blender, she was trying to make pudding, and the blender just exploded! 

"OH MY GOSH!  Look at all that blood!  Violet, Violet Honey, are you all right?  All that bloo ---"  *thud*

 

Just at that moment, Drake Mallard blacked out.  He took one look at Violet's arm and clothes, and the ground suddenly came up to meet him at a surprisingly quick rate of speed. 

"Oh no Gos!  We killed Dad!  What are we going to do?  Mom's going to kill us!  What if he hurt his head?" Violet wailed at Gosalyn. 

"Don't worry.  It is Dad, remember?  He'll be okay.  No one has a thicker skull than Dad.  And besides, look at his chest, he's still breathing.  Don't worry; he'll wake up in a few minutes with nothing more than a really bad headache.  Why don't you go get some aspirin out of the bathroom and bring it in here.  He's going to need it when he wakes up," Gosalyn said in an attempt to calm Violet, but not altogether able to keep the slight worry out of her voice.

'What if he did hurt his head?  I'd better check his vitals, just to make sure.  I just had to get Violet out of here while I did it.  She'll be better off doing something instead of just sitting here anyway.'

Now, the only thing that the Mallard daughters were unaware of at this point is that Drake had not truly blacked out.  He was going to beat them at their own game. 

'You know, they're concern for me is really touching.  I wonder how long I should play along with this?  I guess I'll gauge it by how long Violet can stand it.  I know Gos could handle this, but Violet isn't all that old yet, and she isn't used to seeing me hurt the way Gosalyn did when I was still an active crime fighter.'

"Here's the stuff Gosalyn.  I even brought him some water.  Should we get him a pillow and a blanket?  I heard on the Discovery channel that when someone goes into shock it is important to keep them warm" Violet asked Gosalyn as she placed the bottle of aspirin and the glass of water beside her Father's limp form.  Worry evident in her blue eyes.

"No, I think he's okay.  He should be coming around any minute now anyway.  And, you are right about the shock therapy, but Dad isn't in shock, and it isn't cold, so he won't get cold naturally either."

'Well, I guess I should go on ahead and end this now, Violet sounds pretty worried, and Gos is almost beginning to run out of things for her to do.  Oh well, at least they didn't get me entirely this year.  Last year with Violet driving the car was bad.  They really did me in good for that one.  I must admit though, I was just a little shocked to see Violet when they first ran out here.  They did a good job applying all that gore.  That must have been Gos's doing.'

Just then, Drake began to slowly come to, and struggled up into a sitting position.  Gosalyn was studying his face closely, looking for signs of disorientation and other problems.  Violet was simply staring wide eyed at her father, afraid to move. 

"Well, how did you guys like my little fall there?  I love the tomato sauce blood mixture.  It came out really well this time Gosalyn."  Drake spoke to his daughters, trying hard to suppress the laughter that was building in his throat. 

"You mean, you knew Dad?  You knew all along?  Did you hit your head too hard?  Are you okay?" Violet asked, still looking at her father worriedly. 

"I should have known.  Your vitals were all way too strong.  I should have known you were getting us back.  Well done Dad!"  Gosalyn said to her father, her chagrin for herself and Violet, overlaid with pride for her father, clearly evident in her voice. 

"Okay guys.  You had better go and get cleaned up Violet honey.  You need to get ready for bed soon anyway.  I really am okay, Violet.  It's all right.  Gosalyn and I will clean up in the kitchen.  You can come back down to say goodnight when you get ready for bed."  With that, Drake ruffled Violet's strawberry curls and pushed her into the house and up the stairs.

Later that same evening, Drake was tucking Violet into bed for the evening.  They had just finished her favorite story, The Tailor of Gloucester, and she had suddenly gone quiet.  Drake was instantly worried, and asked Violet what was wrong.

"Violet, honey, what's going on?  You haven't said a word all evening.  What is bothering you so much?  I thought you and Gosalyn had a good time, and your practical joke was first rate."

At first Violet wouldn't look up from her hands, tucked up into her lap where she was sitting up, covered by her comforter, in bed.  Then all of sudden she looked up at Drake, tears streaming down her face.

"I was so scared.  I though you were hurt, and you looked like you might die, you got so still.  I was afraid we had killed you.  I was so scared you wouldn't wake up, Daddy," Violet snuffled through her tears, her big blue eyes staring straight into her father's equally blue eyes. 

"Oh, Violet!  I didn't know you would get scared like that!  I promise I won't ever leave you, and if anything ever happens to me, you will still have Mom, and Launchpad, and Gosalyn and Honker, and Annie, and Sammi, Sunny, and Salli.  You won't ever be alone my darling, no matter what happens.  I'm fine, and I will always be here for you in one form or another.  Don't worry about that.  I will always love you, and nothing can ever kill that."  Drake's own eyes were filling with tears, and his voice caught in his throat at the mere thought of ever leaving his baby girl.  He smiled reassuringly at Violet, and opened his arms to her.

Violet crawled over her various sheets, blankets, and stuffed animals, wrapping her arms securely around Drake's neck, putting her little head under his bill, and closing her eyes. 

"Daddy?"

"Yes Violet?"

"Would you rock me, please?"

"Of course."

Drake then took Violet over to the rocking chair in the corner of her room, sat down, and waited as she curled up in his lap, still clutching his neck, as if afraid to let go.  When Violet had settled herself comfortably, Drake began to rock, slowly and rhythmically, hearing Violet's breathing slow and deepen, smelling her hair, and feeling her small body go limp in his lap as she drifted off to sleep, safe in his loving arms.  

Disclaimer:  Disney owns Drake Mallard, Honker, Gosalyn, and Lauchpad.  They were used without permission.  Angela McDermot owns Rose, Annie, Salli, Sunny, and Sammi, they were used with her permission, and are characters from her A Rose is a Rose story line.  (great stories! A must read for any DWD fan).  Violet is mine. 

The Tailor of Gloucester is a story by Beatrix Potter.