Love and Sacrifice(v3): Fear

[I wouldn't call this part graphic, but there is some very mild violence, and some pyschological trauma.]

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Three years later, August- 2087
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Thirteen and a half year old Shadow Seikou watched as the people he regarded as his family, the only ones he could trust, if only a little, left for their third out of four annual visits to the 'upperworld'. They never knew what happened when they left, and he didn't tell them. Why? He didn't know, he just didn't feel like telling them... Yet at the same time, he wished with all his heart that they wouldn't go... For those eight weeks out of the whole year, he was miserable. Two weeks out of January, two out of May, three out of August, and one of December.

As soon as they left, he slipped through the shadows to his room, locking the door behind himself. If only he didn't need to eat, he'd stay in his room till they came back, but how could he go for three weeks without food? He'd tried it before, and it took only one and a half weeks till he had to go out for food before he starved himself to death. Even if he tried just sneaking out for meals, they would get him.

He peered into his mirror, and a pair of glowing light green eyes peered back through wild strands of black hair. If it weren't for his fur, his eyes, and his ears, he'd look human... Curse his fur! That was the main thing about him he hated. The eyes he could live with, even the ears and the tail, but the fur? He looked at his hands... Or should he rather call them paws? He had fingers, and thumbs, just like humans, but instead of the nails they had, he had claws, retractable claws... His feet were the same, except they were more paw-like than feet-like. However, his paw-feet were much more quiet than the normal human feet, and also helped him land softly from high places. He growled involuntarily, and then looked at his teeth. Almost human, but with canines like that... He barred his teeth at his reflection, then carefully touched the pointy edge of one of his canines with a finger. Sharp.

Shadow Seikou... That was his name. Donna and Tahari called him Seikou, Donari called him Sei, and the professors and everyone else called him Shadow. He treasured the name Sei the most, however, followed by Seikou, as those were the names the ones closet to him called him.

Freak would have been a more appropriate name in his opinion though. He was a freak of nature, created in a lab by desperate scientists to fight a war that did not reall exist yet! He was shunned by his age group, and the adults who worked there treated him as nothing more than another experiment, which he was.

A knock at the door, which he ignored, until it was followed by the sound of keys jingling together...

Sei breathed in sharply, and his eyes grew wide. How'd they get a key to his room? Without a sound, he lowered himself to a crouching position, his tail held straight.

The door opened, and he pounced, knocking down the man, and stunning him momentarily. Not hesitating for one second, Sei ran through the hallways of the underground hideout, hoping to find somewhere for him to hide. However, they had anticipated this, and he ran straight into one of them. Struggling with all his might, he tried to break free from the tight hold on his arms, but he was outnumbered, and the last thing he wanted to do was kill some of the people who worked in the base. That would only serve to get him into trouble.

"Look like we caught ourselves a little umbreon." One of them sneered as they took him to the basement.

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The basement was the lowest level in the underground hideout. It was where all sorts of things were stored, test tubes, food, spare parts, you name it. It was also the place Sei dreaded during those particular eight weeks of the year.

"Tried to run again Shadow?" One of them asked, his dark brown eyes seeming to laugh at the boy. "There's nowhere to hide, freak. We all live here together, and we all know every single little corner. Besides, we've been doing this for what, five, six years at least? You should be used to it."

They had him tied up tightly. His ankles were bound together, and his hands were too. He wasn't gagged, as there was no one to hear him from that isolated spot in the basement. No matter how loud he yelled, all he would achieve was a sore throat. Besides, they enjoyed hearing him scream... He growled softly, his eyes blazing. He wasn't going to scream this time. He wasn't even going to give them the pleasure of seeing him cry. No, this time was going to be different. He was going to do his best to ignore them. What kind of soldier would he be if he couldn't tolerate torture?

The one who had spoken crouched down infront of the specimen. "Growling at us Shadow? You know that won't do you any good. Growl all you want. You might as well be purring for all I care. Can you purr Shadow? Eevees can, such a nice sound, softer than that of a persian... But then again, eevees are sweet little pokemon, and the last word I'd use to describe you is 'sweet'." He ran one hand through the young teenager's wild black hair, savoring the silky feel. "You should be a good boy, Shadow." He patted him on the head like a pet pokemon, something he knew the boy hated. "We'll hurt you less if you behave." But as he withdrew his hand, Sei sunk his teeth into it, refusing to let go until one of the others kicked him hard in the side. "Little beast!" The bitten one exclaimed, trying to stop the blood flow. "You're going to pay for that." He hissed, leaving to go get his hand treated.

Sei, however, ignored the threats, and simply spat the blood at of his mouth. Biting the scientist, Gareth, had been a big mistake, and he knew that, but he couldn't help it. Sometimes the pokemon side of him overrided his common sense.

"Well, that's a new one." One of them remarked. "Normally he just snaps. First time he really drew blood. Must have to do with him being a teenager now..." The man lowered himself down to Sei's level. "But we're going to see to it that you don't dare try a stunt like that again. By the time we're done with you, you'll wish you were never created."

/I always wish I was never created... Why should now be any different?/ He thought to himself, but his train of thought was interrupted by another kick, followed by punch after punch. /I don't deserve to live... I don't want to live... But I have to live... At least, for now I do.../ Were his last conscious thoughts before he welcomed the darkness of unconsciousness where he could successfully ignore the pain his felt all over his body.

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The next morning, at least, he supposed it was morning, Sei awoke. Morning and night didn't really mean anything to him. He had never seen the sun before, never felt its warm rays. He'd only been to the upper world at night, and for only brief moments. Morning just meant the time when he was supposed to be awake, night just meant the time when he was supposed to sleep. But there was always activity in the underground hideout at all times, so he couldn't really tell the difference. He licked his dry lips, wincing as realized his lip was cut because he could taste dried blood. His whole body ached, and one of his eyes was practically swollen shut.

He was curled up in a corner, and his hair was loose. It must have unraveled from his braid yesterday... It cascaded down his shoulders in silken locks that covered his whole body because of his current position. As he raised his head to look around, he realized there was a collar around his neck, and he was chained to the wall. Trapped. Not a feeling he was fond of, but one he knew all to well.

"Awake are you?"

It was the one he had bitten. Sei awarded him with a blank stare, not wanting to waste his time conveying his feelings through words. Words were meaningless, actions were everything.

"Quiet, aren't you? Well if you don't speak, you won't eat." The man said, setting a plate down near the boy.

He shrugged, closing his eyes, rather, his eye, nonchalantly.

"Trying to be tough Seikou? I wonder how tough you'll be if I cut your hair short?" He threatened, taken a pair of scissors from his pocket.

Sei's eyes flew open, and he immediately pressed his back flat against the wall. "Don't you dare..." He hissed, his eyes wide with fear. Sei knew it was foolish of him to treasure his hair so much, but it was the only thing he had that he allowed himself to get attached to.

"Ah, finally a reaction from my brave little soldier." Gareth smirked. "Any move like what you did yesterday, and off it goes. I know how much you treasure that hair of yours." He set down the scissors. "But I don't think I'll be cutting it off, unless you give me a good reason to." Reaching out again, he gently touched the boy's cut lip. "Bite me if you dare, I'll just be rougher on you." He moved his hand to the boy's cheek, caressing it with a light touch. Suddenly, he viciously grabbed Sei by the collar, pulling him closer till the chain had reached its limits. "Nothing changes the fact that you're a freak though, and therefore don't deserve to live. You're only alive to serves us." He let go of the collar and then bakchanded Sei hard, knocking him to the floor.

"Bastard." The hybrid whispered, the corners of his lips curling into a snarl. It took him extreme control to prevent himself from lunging at the scientist and killing him with his claws... But Sei remembered what he had promised himself in the beginning. He was [i]not[/i] going to give them the satisfaction of driving him to his limits. He was going to stay calm, endure what they did to him, as much as he hated it. Counting to ten, he picked himself up, sitting against the wall.

"Well, isn't this wonderful? Four words from you in a span of less than five minutes?" The man's mocking gaze bore into Sei. "I can tell you're thirsty." He picked up a glass of water, holding it infront of the hybrid. "Here." He held it to Sei's lips and let the boy drink half of it before withdrawing it and setting it back down. "And I'm sure you're hungry too; you had only one meal yesterday. But I know you can go for a long time with little or no food, so we're going to play a game." He smiled evilly, an eerie sort of smile that Sei was overly familiar with. "I'm going to break your wild spirit if it's the last thing I do. By the end of our two week session, you're going to be whimpering and groveling. You will, of course, have your usual one week recovery period so your 'family' don't suspect anything, but I have a feeling this is something you'll never recover from... And that's what I'm aiming at."

"I. Don't. Care." Sei replied, lifting his head so that the scientist could see the dead look in his eyes. "Do what you want."

"We'll see if you still think the same way when I'm done. They go too easy on you during you're training. If you don't learn what true pain is, you'll never survive this war. You'll get captured and end up telling them everything."

/Easy?/ Sei wondered. /He calls that going easy on me? If that guy has kids I pity them./

"You need to learn what it's like to be terrified. The last sessions will be nothing compared to this one."

And did Sei learn true fear. He learnt what it was like to be stripped of his pride, and the little innocence he still held. He learnt what it was like to hurt so badly both mentally and physically that suicide would seem like the only way out. He learnt what it was like to have the things and people he loved used against him in terrible ways. What he had been through in the years before was nothing compared those next two weeks, and the years that were yet to come. But it only served to help the already emotionally unstable hybrid retreat further into his anti-social shell.

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