Feelings

Feelings

This story will include for a few seasons. So it doesn't take place in any set one

They were all sat in the lunch cafeteria. Joey and Dawson were together like always. Jack and Jen were sitting next to each other and Pacey was sitting between Jen and Dawson. They were making plans for that night. Pacey wasn't paying that much attention. He'd heard they were going to Dawson's at 7 but that was it. He was too busy watching her. He found himself doing that a lot lately. Just watching her. He hoped to god no-none had noticed. What would he say if they had? He'd just have to try and forget about her. The bell rang, signalling the end of lunch and the beginning of the afternoon lessons.
The afternoon flew past for Pacey. Most the time he spent trying to forget about. He'd almost succeeded by the time the bell went for the end of the day. Then he rang into, literally, in the hall on the way out of his lesson. She was not happy.
"Watch where you're going Pacey!" she snapped.
"I'm wasn't the only one not looking where they were going Potter."
She glared at him. Then carried on her way, shouting "see you at Dawson's later" as she went.
He watched her go. He shook himself out of it. He had to stop thinking about her. She was going out with his best friend for god's sake. He was lost in his thoughts when Dawson came up to him.
"Just checking you're still coming tonight."
"Erm sorry, I might not come. I've got a headache." He lied. The real reason was he couldn't face spending a whole night near Joey. But he couldn't tell Dawson that.
"Ok well, I'll see you tomorrow then." And with that he ran off, probably to find Joey.
Pacey started his walk home, alone. He was usually walked with Dawson but he had taken off. His mind started to drift again. And once again she found away into his thoughts. Josephine Potter. The one girl he could never have. And one again his thoughts were interrupted by someone.
"Hey Pace. You look like you need someone to walk with." It was Jen. She was now walking beside him. Not really giving him any chance to answer whether he need someone to walk with or not.
"What's up?" She must have noticed he didn't look his usually smiling Pacey Witter self.
"Nothings up." He was getting used to this lying lark.
"Pacey, that's crap something bothering. Or maybe it's someone." She looked at him. Pacey had this horrible feeling she knew something that he didn't want being made public.
"What do you mean by that?"
"Do I really need to tell you what I mean?"
"It's obvious isn't it?" She must have seen him watching Joey. He had tried to hide it. He really had. It just got more and more hard not to look at her.
"Just a little bit. No one else has noticed. And don't worry I won't say anything."
"Thanks Jen." They walked the rest of the way home in silence. Once at Jen's she said good bye and Pacey carried on his way. He didn't feel like going home. He couldn't be doing with the Witter clan tonight. He tried to think of somewhere to go. His mind started to wonder again. He couldn't help but think of her. And how she was going out with his best friend. He felt so guilty. He decided he'd head back to Jen's. She knew how he felt. About Joey and his family. He turned and walked back to Jen's. He walked up her front steps. His fist lingered near the door before actually knocking. Jen came to the door. She didn't look to surprised to see him. She guessed he didn't want to go home and that he needed to talk so she let him. He followed her up to her room. Once there he fell back on her bed. His head was spinning. Jen chucked a blanket at him from her wardrobe. She sat down next to him as he sat up.
"You gonna say anything?"
"How can I say anything Jen? She's going out with my best friend. And it would only result in me proving that I am a total loser. How many people do you know that fall for their best friends girlfriend?"
"I can't say I do know any. But you never know. Maybe they aren't as brave as you are. You admitted your feelings."
Pacey lay back on the bed, sighing. "I want to tell her. But I can't. I'd probably end up getting hurt and Dawson and her would both probably end up no speaking to me. "He looked at Jen. Hoping she would say he was wrong. But she didn't. She knew he was right. He climbed off the bed and picked up the blanket. He walked across to Jen's chair and sat down, wrapping the blanket round him.
"Thanks Jen." She didn't to ask what he was thanking her for.
"It's ok."

The next morning Pacey left through Jen's bedroom window so they wouldn't have to explain to Grams. He thanked Jen and left. He started walking across the lawn and was just in front of Dawon's ladder. That's when he almost literally bumped in to Joey again. And again she wasn't happy.
"Morning to you to Jo." He said as she glared at him. Inside he was hurt that she could be that mean when he hadn't done anything, he couldn't let her see that though. He carried on his way. Joey shouted him. He carried on, pretending he didn't hear her. Didn't work though. She came running up behind him.
"Pacey, where are you walking from?" She sounded out of breath.
"Not that it's any of your business but I've just come from Jen's. Now if you don't mind I have to go home and face the family to see if they realised I never came home last night." He started to walk again, hoping Joey wouldn't follow. He couldn't do with seeing her first thing. It would mean she would keep appearing in his head through out the day even more. Joey stood there watching him go. She couldn't help but wonder what was up with him. She shook herself out of her thoughts and started up Dawson's ladder.

No one was in at Pacey's. "That's about right." he thought, He looked at his watch. "Damn!" he was late for work at Screenplay. He ran outside and jumped on his bike, which was propped up just by the door.
Work was boring as ever for Pacey. In one hour he had had two customers. World record he thought to himself. He put his feet up on the desk and leaned back in he chair. He was just drifting off to sleep when the bell on the door rang. He jumped up startled.
"Make you jump Pacey?" Joey was standing in front of him, grinning.
"Of course not. Can I help?"
"Not really, I haven't got anything to do so thought I'd come hang out with you here. Problem with that?"
He did have a problem with that. He had to spend the rest of the afternoon with the girl he couldn't stop thinking about. Like he was going to tell her that though.
"No, no problem. Where's Dawson?"
"He's working on the english project. I've already done mine so I thought I'd come find you." She walked round to the other side of the desk and dropped down in the chair next to him.
"Okay." Pacey sank back into his chair and placed his feet back up on the desk. He shut his eyes so he wouldn't look at her. But she was there in his mind anyway. No matter what he did or where he went she was always with him. About an hour had passed when Jen and Jack walked in. The bell startled Pacey again. Joey who was in the back laughed and walked out.
"Hello you two. What you up to?" Jen asked, staring at Pacey as if to ask "Have you said anything?" Pacey stared back, hoping the look on his face said no.
"Well I'm working. And Miss Potter is hanging around being her usual sarcastic self. And if you really want you could take her away with you." He flashed a smile at Joey, who glared back.
"Well me and Jack are getting a video and going back to mine. You're both welcome to join us. When do you finish Pace?"
"In about" he checked his watch, "7 minutes." Jen, Jack and Joey decided they'd hang around and wait for him to finish, before going to get Dawson then heading back to Jen's.
Dawson was still working so he didn't come over. Everyone lay about in Jen's bedroom watching the film. Pacey and Jack got bored of it really quickly. Pacey lay on his back on the floor, playing with an elastic band. Jack was drawing random shapes in Jen's notebook. Joey sat up and turned around to face Jen on her bed. Jen sighed and switched the film off.
"Hey! We were watching that." Yelled Jack.
"No you weren't. For the past half an hour you've been drawing and Pacey's been playing with and elastic band." Jen said in annoyance. Joey smiled to herself. It sounded so pathetic.
Pacey laughed, "There's nothing wrong with elastic bands. Well it's better than that film anyway." Jack laughed.
Jen shook her head, "Boys!" Joey laughed at Jen, "So what do we do now?"
"I know!" Jack sat up straight. "We act like kids and have a pillow fight." He threw a pillow at Joey. She sat up shocked at first then picked it back at threw it at Jack. Pacey grabbed another one and aimed it at Jen who threw one at him before he had chance. He threw it her anyway but missed and hit Joey who was attacking Jack. She promptly jumped off the bed and started hitting Pacey. Jack then started on Jen who hit back. Pacey was desperately trying to get a pillow from the floor while Joey continually hit him with the pillow. Then she hit him abit too hard in the knees and sent him to the floor. Jack took one aim at Joey while she was least expecting it and sent her to the floor too. As she fell next to Pacey, Jack burst out laughing. Jen couldn't help but laugh even though she knew being so close to Joey must be uncomfortable for Pacey. Joey was on the floor laughing, Pacey was trying not to look at her. He loved it when she laughed. She always looked so happy. Pacey sat up.
"I'm gonna go. See you all soon." He got up to go but Joey stopped him.
"Wait a minute ad I'll walk with you. I gotta go to. Thanks for letting us wreak your room Jen."
Jen laughed, "Anytime." She half smiled at Pacey. "Cya!"
Pacey walked out closely followed by Joey. He kept his eyes on the ground. He didn't want to look at her. They walked past Dawson's. Joey looked up to see if he was near the window. He wasn't. She sighed and stared down at the ground. They both walked for awhile like that before Joey finally spoke.
"What's the matter?"
"Nothing's the matter." He lifted his gaze and looked at her. "God she'd beautiful." He thought. "What makes you think something's up."
She shrugged, "You just don't seem your usual witty self." She lifted her gaze also and stared back.
"It's nothing you need to worry about Potter. Trust me." He dropped his gaze again. He could have easily told her then. He really wanted to.

School was finishing in a couple of days. No one had plans for the summer. Except Dawson, he had decided to go visit Aunt Gwen. Later that night he decided to ask Joey to come along. Aunt Gwen loved Joey and Joey loved Aunt Gwen.
"Sorry Dawson I just don't want to go. As much as I love Aunt Gwen I want to stay here with my friends for the summer. Surely you understand that."
"I understand you would rather spend time with your friends than spend time with me, your boyfriend. Or have you forgotten we're going out. You seem to have spent more time with Pacey than me over the past few days." Dawson's voice was getting louder.
"That's not fair Dawson. You were busy so I went to find our friends. You remember those people don't you?" Her voice to was getting louder
This had soon turn into an argument. Joey was confused, it seemed to come out of nowhere. She stood there staring at Dawson as he carried on about how he remembered who his friends were and how Joey was spending more time with them. Joey was completely shocked. She never knew Dawson could be like this. In the end she gave up.
"I can't believe you think I would give up my friends for you. You go to Gwen's. But I won't be here waiting for you. If this is how it's going to be from now on then I think it's best we end this right now."
"When you say this what do you mean?"
"I mean us Dawson." She could feel tears in her eyes, but she held them back. She didn't want Dawson to see her cry.
Dawson stood there in silence. "You can't mean that?"
"Sorry but I do." She tuned around and headed out the window. "Have a good summer Dawson." And with that she climbed out the window and down the ladder. Dawson collapsed on his bed in tears. He couldn't believe she had just ended it. Once Joey had reached the end of the ladder she didn't know where to go. She didn't want to go home, not just yet. She thought about going to Jen's. She headed across Dawson's Lawn to Jen's. Slowly she knocked on Jen's door. Jen came running down the stairs and opened the door.
"Joey! Hey."
"Hi, erm can we talk?" she said awkwardly. Jen open the door wider to let her in. she pointed upstairs. Joey walked up to Jen's room and dropped down on her bed. Jen followed and sat next to her.
"Ok what's happened between you and Dawson?"
"Is it that obvious?" Jen nodded. "Well we split up. I ended it. He said something about me spending more time with Pacey. And before I knew it we were arguing. I just I don't." she broke down in tears. Jen put her arm around her.
"Maybe it's for the best. For now anyway."
"Yeah. But I don't know whether I love him like I did. I look at him and all I see is Dawson Leery, my best friend. Not Dawson Leery, my boyfriend. I just see him as someone I coan talk too. That's it. And then I look at" She trailed off. Jen looked at her.
"Who do you look at in that way?"
Joey sighed, "I look at Pacey and I see someone who can make me laugh and who I can talk to. Someone who's always there no matter what. I don't know anymore. Pacey always used to annoy me. But over the last few days we've spent more time together and I just see him in a different light now." There was a knock at Jen's bedroom door. Grams entered.
"Jennifer there's a young man downstairs wanting to talk. I'll send him up." She walked back out.
"What if that's Dawson?" Joey sounded panicky
"Don't worry, it's probably just Jack." Jen assured her.
"Sorry it's not Jack. Why don't you want it to be Dawson?" Pacey walked in smiling.
"We erm split up. Jen I might go." She stood up.
"Ok well I'll ring you later we can finish what we were talking about then." Joey nodded and said good bye to Pacey then walked out. Pacey sat down next to Jen.
"I pick a bad time to come round?"
"Kinda."

The last two days of school were hell for Joey. She kept seeing Dawson. The look in his eyes said he hated her. Then she kept seeing Pacey laughing and joking around. She couldn't help but find herself falling for him more and more each day. Pacey wasn't enjoying the last two days of school either. He had Dawson moaning about Joey every time it was just the two of them around. Then he kept seeing Joey around. He found himself falling for her more and more each time he saw her. Jen said he should say something. He said he couldn't, she had just split up with his best friend. Jen kept dropping hints that she liked him. But he juts didn't get it. Joey had confided in Jen that she was falling for Pacey in a big way. It was driving her mad seeing them around school pretending they didn't feel anything for each other. She had told Jack and made him promise not to say anything. Jack had already guessed. He'd seen Joey look at Pacey and Pacey look at Joey. He could see how much they liked each other in their eyes.
"Hey Jack." Jen strolled up to Jack who was sorting out his locker. "What you got planned for tonight?"
"Nothing. But I'm guessing you have something in mind." He turned and smiled before going back to sorting out his locker.
"Well now you've come to mention it I was thinking a little trip to the cinema. You and me and Pacey and Joey. Dawson's going away tonight so he can't come."
"Ok but I sense some plan behind this. You know a match making one." He grinned at her. She didn't need to reply Jack knew what she was thinking.
Pacey and Joey reluctantly agreed to go. Jen said they had to as it was the beginning of summer and they needed to celebrate that. They met outside the cinema. They all paid for themselves. Jack went to get popcorn for him and Jen.
"Joey do you want any popcorn or anything? My treat." Pacey smiled at her.
Joey smiled back, "I'll have a bar of chocolate and a coke please." Joey brushed her hair behind her ear. Pacey walked over holding two cups of coke, a bar of chocolate and a large box of popcorn. Joey took hers off him and said thanks. They followed Jen and Jack into the theatre. Jen picked to sit near the back to the left. She climbed in. Jack followed and sat down beside her. Joey sat down next to Jack. Pacey struggle along the aisle with his popcorn. Joey laughed as he also dropped as he sat down next to her. He glared at her in a joking kind of way. Jen was watching them
"Will you look at them? They're made for each other." She whispered to Jack. Jack just smiled and nodded.
Pacey sat there watching the film, placing popcorn in his mouth every so often. Joey had finished her chocolate a while ago and was abit hungry. She slowly and quiet slipped her hand into Pacey's box of popcorn. Pacey placed his hand at the same time. His hand touched Joey's as she lifted hers out. They paused. She quickly moved her hand away. Pacey thought for a moment before moving the box in between himself and Joey.
"You can shared it." He whispered softly in her ear. She smiled shyly at him. They stared deep into each other's eyes for a second not saying anything before returning to the film.
After the film they stood around deciding what to do next.
"I'm kind of tired. I might head home. I'll see you all tomorrow?" Jen asked. She threw Jack a glance to tell him to do the same.
"Yeah I might head home too. I'll walk you home first Jen. Cya you two." Jen and Jack waved before walking off towards Jen's.
Pacey sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "So what do you want to do now Potter?"
"I just feel like walking. If you want to that is."
"Fine by me. I don't feel like going home just yet."
They walked for a while by the creek in silence. Pacey was trying to think of a way to tell Joey how he felt about her. There wasn't a way that he knew of. Not since she'd just spilt from Dawson. Yeah he didn't know why but it didn't feel right to tell her now. Despite how he felt. He was lost in his thoughts when Joey spoke.
She spoke in a soft, quiet voice, "Pacey?" she took a deep breath, "I need to tell you something."
"Ok." They sat down on a near by bench. Joey stared out across the water. It was really still. The only thing visible on it was the reflection on the moon.
"For a while now I've erm, " Joey looked down. She couldn't look at him while she said this, "found myself falling for you. I know you probably don't feel the same but I had to tell you." She took a deep breath.
Pacey was shocked. Here he was worrying about what she'd say if he was ever to tell her and she just came out and said it. He lifted her head to face him. He leaned over and kissed her gently.
"I feel the same." He said in a low voice.