Monday morning I posted myself outside room 107, my homeroom and also Jana's. I was determined to talk to her. I didn't know what I was going to say, I just had to say something. If I could just TALK to her, maybe she'd change her mind and want to get back together. I had an excuse to talk to her, too. Going through some old homework papers the night before, I had found one of her math papers. I few weeks back, I had missed some problems on the same worksheet, and since Jana's pretty good in math, I had asked to check her work to mine. I guess I'd just forgotten to give it back.
I had waited about 10 or 15 minutes when the bell rang. Soon kids were streaming in all over the place and the hall got noisy with all the kids shouting. I had just begun to wonder if Jana was absent that day when suddenly I saw her coming up the hall. She was staring downwards in deep thought, not really paying attention to what was going on around her. So she was almost up to the door when she looked up and saw me there. She came up in front of me and we kind of stood there a minute looking at each other until I reached into my notebook and pulled out the math page.
"I found this and thought you might need it. Umm, in case you need to study for a test or something." Dumb! There were no tests scheduled in math and even if there was, she wouldn't need this old homework to study for it. But it was too late now. Jana reached out and took the paper from me. She glanced down at it, then back at me.
"Thanks," she said gratefully, flashing me her gorgeous smile. "I've been looking all over for it. I'm glad you found it."
We stood there shifting feet for a minute. I glanced nervously around, racking my brain for something to say. This was my chance and I was going to blow it! Why couldn't I just say to Jana how much I missed her and that I wanted to get back together?
"I saw you at the library on Saturday afternoon," Jana said suddenly.
Oh no! My cheeks flushed bright red. The library! Saturday! The day I was there with Sara Sawyer. She must have seen me with her what if she thought I actually LIKED Sara? Oh no, oh no, oh no.
"Yeah, we had toto work on our reports for Family Living." And that's ALL we were doing! I wanted to add, but couldn't. Please believe me.... I begged silently.
"Hey, would you guys move? You're blocking the door!" Joel Murphy snapped, trying to squeeze in between us. I realized then how stupidly I'd been standing right in the doorway. Quickly, I stepped back.
"Sorry, Joel," I muttered.
"I guess I'd better go in, too. See you later." Jana gave a quick nod and then rushed into our homeroom. I stood there a moment, feeling weak. What a failure! I had only messed things up worse between us. I should just shut up and let nature take it's course I thought. It's obvious Jana doesn't really want to see me or talk to me right now anyway.
And when I entered the room a moment later, I glanced at Jana. She was staring at the top of her desk like it held the secret to life. She really doesn't like me anymore. I slumped into my seat and put my head in my hands. Life was so unfair.