…SURVIVOR…
3
The
plane ride over was long and boring and she dozed off a few times during the
flight but her dreams were always filled with him.
She
hated that he had left her and she was the one that was haunted by his image
during her slumber.
The plane touched down in LA and she slowly made her way to the baggage terminal.
Collecting her small amount of belongings, she headed towards the car rental sections.
"How may I help you Mam?" said the lady behind the counter
"I would like to hire a car"
"For how long?"
Such a simple question but she did not know the answer. Looking down at her luggage she finally spoke…
"A week"
"Manual or automatic?"
"Automatic please"
"Ok … I have a Barina automatic that you can have for a week … what name am I booking it under, Mam?"
"Uhhh … Kimberly Jarvis" she said with an ease that betrayed her as having that name her whole life.
"Miss Jarvis if you would sign here and here. The car is in the parking lot. Here are your keys. It has a full tank and you can travel as many miles as you want … however you must have the car back here by 7pm next Sunday with a full tank of gas in it."
"Sure … Sunday 7pm with a full tank. Got it!"
She took the keys and headed out to the car that would be delivering her to her past.
But she had to drive it there first … and that was what scared her the most.
~*~
She arrived there in little over 3 hours. It had taken her longer than what it would have normally taken. She had stopped for dinner, about 5 toilet rests and of course she had to stop and get lollies for the trip.
But who was she kidding … no one. She was just dawdling. Wasting time.
Now she was driving past the 'Welcome to Sunnydale' sign.
It was a new sign but the smiling sun still seemed out of place.
Making her way around the small town, her eyes marvelled at how many people were out at night.
This was SunnyHell … people … or people that didn't want to die … would never roam around after dark. Although the town would never admit it … it was unspoken knowledge that when the sun went down it was not safe outside.
But families were out enjoying the fairly warm night. They were playing in the playgrounds … couples were walking hand in hand along the streets.
People were even visiting loved one's in the cemetery.
The cemetery.
She pushed her foot against the accelerator to get away from one of the many cemeteries that was situated in this town.
In no time at all she had found herself at Giles' old apartment.
In all her haste to get off of the phone to Mitchell she had neglected to ask if he still lived here … or maybe he would be in the hospital …
No … knowing Giles' he would be more comfortable being at home. At least that is what she hoped … because she hated hospitals.
Walking towards his door she paused in the courtyard.
It was the same. Yet it was different. Giles was not out here reading his books. Not the mystical ones … just a good old novel that he would often read.
She smiled to herself before heading to the door.
Raising a tentative hand to knock … she noticed that it was shaking.
Taking a deep breath she calmed her nerves and then knocked quietly. Inwardly hoping that she would not be heard…
She could hear footsteps coming from inside … they were getting louder meaning that she had indeed been heard and that someone was coming to open the door.
Her bottom lip began to quiver in anticipation and nerves. She bit on it to try and make it stop … but it was in vain.
Her thoughts blurred as she focussed on the knob that was slowly being turned.
As the door opened, her eyes wondered upwards to the person that was now standing before her.
She had not seen that face in two years … and God she had missed it.
The eyes staring back at her were filled with disbelief and awe.
Tears began to well in both of their eyes as their chests began to heave.
The person stretched out their arms and pulled her towards them.
She could only mutter one word …
"Mom?"
It was the first time she had spoken to her mother since she had left.
"Ohhh … Buffy!" She embraced her daughter even tighter.
Tears were now flowing freely as her mother cupped her face and wiped them away frantically … her mother touched her hair … her chin … her lips … her shoulders … her hands.
A mother's touch can say so much and take away so much pain … even after all of these years apart!
"Mom … ohh God … Mom"
They hugged once more and didn't want to let go but a voice seeking their attention brought them out of their embrace.
"Buffy … Buffy is that really you?"
"Willow?"
She could hardly see from the tears clouding her vision but she could never forget her best friends voice.
The red head ran towards her.
She nearly knocked her over as she slung two thin arms around her neck.
"Wil!"
"Buffy … you're here … you're really here!"
"Yeah I am Wil … I'm here"
A buzzer sounded throughout the apartment and this startled the new arrival.
"What was that?" she asked
"That was Giles'. He is bound to his bed and so when he wants something he just uses the buzzer and we come-a-runnin'!" joked the little witch
"So you're at his beck 'n' call … he's gotta love that!" she jokingly said but the others only smiled half-heartedly.
"I better go and see what he wants" Willow said as she left the room.
"Look at you two playing nurse"
"Yeah … who would have thought that two years ago my only daughter would run away leaving just a flimsy note and I end up looking after her dying Watcher"
"Mum … please … not yet … I can't get into it right now"
"Well I think two years is a long enough amount of time for you to come up with an explanation…"
"Buffy" came Willow's voice from the top if the stairs
"Yeah…" she said thankful for the interruption
"He wants to see you…"
"Ok" was all she could say as she made her way up the stairs.
In a whispered voice Willow said…
"I have to warn you Buffy … he is very sick … he … he … he kinda doesn't look like he used to. It will come as a shock when you first see him and…"
"Its ok Wil…" she said as touched her friend on the shoulder and then entered the room alone.
There was a single lamp that emitted an eerie glow around the room.
She moved ever so slowly towards the bed and that was when she finally saw him.
Laying on his back … his quivering form was so tiny in comparison to the Giles she had in her memories.
His eyes were shut and he looked like he was just sleeping peacefully … except for the sharp intake of breath that he took every couple of seconds.
She eyed one of the chairs on the side of the bed and it creaked as she came to rest on it.
His eyes fluttered open.
"Bu … Buffy"
His voice was so small.
Inferior.
Where was the Giles that would glare at her sternly when she wanted to date and he wanted her to train?
Where was the Giles that would take charge of the research parties and always ended up finding the answers?
"I'm here … Giles … I'm here"
She took hold of the hand that was closest to her.
She couldn't believe how small it looked. His fingers were more slender than hers.
She surveyed his form under the blankets. Although the covers added layers … she could see that his body had wilted away.
Turning his head towards her, his gaze rested on her petite features.
"Ohhh … m…my Buffy … I…I am s…so glad y…you could c…come"
It was clearly visible that it hurt him to talk.
"Shhh … Giles. You don't have to talk."
"B…Buffy I tri…tried to find y…you…"
"I know … I'm so sorry Giles … I didn't know that you were sick … if I had known then I would have…"
"Shhh … th…that's not im…im…important now"
"I couldn't stay Giles. After everything that happened … I couldn't stay. I thought a million times about coming back … but it was too painful."
"I un…understand"
"Ohhh God Giles … I've missed you … I love you"
"I l…love you t…too Buffy. Y…you are my d…d…daughter in my h…heart"
Buffy flung her body onto his but not in a rash manner … because she was sure that she would break him if she weren't careful. She gently hugged him and kissed his forehead.
Tears were pouring out of her eyes and making her breast heave with uncontrollable sobs.
Giles raised his hand and traced her face … it looked like it took all the strength in the world for him to do this.
Buffy nuzzled into his palm as he said…
"You h…have done me p…proud Buffy"
"Giles … you have made me proud too"
"I love y…you Buffy. L…live your l…life to the ful…fullest. No re…regrets. I h…have none"
"I regret not being here for you"
"Don't. J…just be th…there for them n…now please."
"I promise Dad"
She sobbed against his chest … she couldn't stand to see him in this much pain. She couldn't do anything to help him. Not even all the Slayer strength in the world would help her to save him.
She lifted her head slightly off of his chest and that was when she realised…
It wasn't moving anymore.
It was dormant.
Nothing.
Her eyes searched for his … for life in them.
Nothing.
They just stared at her with wide nothing-ness.
His hand was limp by her side.
Nothing.
Her chest hurt.
Her eyes hurt.
Her heart hurt.
He was gone.
Her Watcher was gone.
Her friend was gone.
Her Dad was gone.
*
You left me here
You walked away
You didn't look back
You kept going
I couldn't run
I couldn't feel
I couldn't move
I couldn't stay
So I packed my things
So I wrote them notes
So I didn't say goodbye
So I left them all here
*
~*~*~
TBC…
~Chikki~
B/A lover/shipper/believer for eternity!