Guess who's going to introduce this chapter? None other than....FILLERBUNNY!
Fillerbunny: *Shown with a gun in his mouth about to pull the trigger*
Oh no, none of that now! *author pulls away large shotgun to Bunny's dismay.*
F.B.: NO! I WAS SO CLOSE! WHY CAN'T YOU LET ME CEASE TO BE?
Because you're too funny and you have not served me to the fullest yet.
F.B.: *reaches for shotgun cartridge and begins to bang it against the side of his head, hoping it would have the same affect as being fired out of a barrel.*
Now that's just sad. *snatches away cartridge*
F.B.: I've been alive for 200 YEARS! WHY CAN'T I REST IN PEACE?
That's enough, Do your job! *kicks bunny in front of the audience.*
F.B.: Sigh... *happy smile instantly comes on his face* WHEEE TIME FOR FUN!....sigh *begins doing a happy jig*
Gotta love those jigs.
F.B.: WATCH AS I CLIMB THE ANDIES! *climbs Andies* BUNGEE JUMP OFF THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE! *bungee jumps* WRITE A STORY ABOUT ZIM! *begins to write the story, then takes the pen and jams it into his throat*
NOOO! I TOLD YOU ALREADY NONE OF THAT! *takes pen out of Bunny's neck and heals it up*
F.B.: Soooo close *begins to cry*
Ok, you've reached me. I'll let you die now.
F.B.: REALLY? *becomes very happy*
Sure. Here. *hands Filler Bunny two pills.*
F.B.: What are these?
Cyanide pills. They'll kill you instantly.
F.B.: YIPEE! *Downs the pills*
*snicker*
F.B.: What are you laughing at? *looks down to see he's still alive* WHY AREN'T I DYING??
I pulled a trick on you Mister Bunny. Those were two highly effective laxatives, the only way you're gonna die is on the stool! AAAHAHAHA!
F.B.: NOOO! *stomach begins to rumble and runs into the bathroom. Loud, deafening "stool" noises can be heard in the background.*
Well that was fun. Don't worry kids, even if he does die in there, we'll just regenerate him back to his old self.
F.B.: NOOOOOOOOO! *more "stool" noises. The wall next to him reads: "Call Jhonen Vasquez for a good time, he owns all this stuff."
Enjoy!
Chapter 13: DIB VS IRK.....IN MADISON SQUARE GARDEN*
*Last part is void.
"In the past week," The Irken reporter was stating off of the television screen which Zim was glued to. "there have been an unseemingly large number of explosions and what seem to be attacks being made on very large complexes and military bases throughout the area."
"Dib." Zim said in a low voice, Gir dancing behind him.
"These events seem to stem from the disappearance of Invader Ima, one of Irk's greatest invaders. Is there a connection to be found between these two occurences?"
"Yessss." Zim whispered with a smile on his face, nodding his head up and down waiting for the reporter to state the obvious.
"OF COURSE NOT! HAHAHAHAHAHA! THAT WOULD BE RIDICULOUS!" The reporter's camera crew could be heard laughing hysterically in the background as Zim picked up Gir and threw him through the screen.
"BLAST IT! AM I THE ONLY INVADER ON THE PLANET TO SEE DIB FOR WHAT HE TRULY IS?"
"I miss Ima." Gir said as he climbed out of what was left of the television. "I also miss bellbottoms.....DISCO FEVER!"
"Quiet Gir! I need complete silence to put two of my most ingenious plans into fruition."
"I like fruition, its comes in a can." As Gir stated the fact that he liked fruition, Zim continued to tinker on one of his two diabolical projects to help him bring down Dib. "Whatcha makin?"
"Funny you should ask Gir. With this last smelt of the blowtorch aaaannndddd...THERE!" Zim put down the large blowtorch with which he was molding *I like to say molding, its randy!* and marveled at his latest creation. "By the prickings of my thumb, I have made a major discovery."
"That thumb pricking hurts?" Gir asked.
"Well yes, that and that Dib must be hiding away with others races who are disguising themselves as Invaders or will meet them within the confines of this chapter, whatever works."
"......Ya lost me!" Gir cried out.
"What I need to do is disguise myself as an Irken Invader thereby getting access to the underground.....thingey!"
Gir's eyes flashed to red causing him to revert back to his smart side for a few seconds. "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard in my entire life."
"The robot's right dear." Zim's mother butted in. "Why disguise yourself as something you already are, and that costume is just horrible looking, it looks nothing like an Irken Invader. I've never seen an Invader who was purple before."
"I couldn't find any green....BUT NEVERTHELESS!"
"Nevertheless what?"
".....III WAAANNTT TOOO WEAR IT!" Zim said beginning a tantrum.
"Honey, I'm putting my hand down on this one."
"I'm gonna hold my breath until I die if I can't wear it!" Zim then took in a big grasp of air, expanded his cheeks and held his breath.
"ZIM! ZIM STOP IT! STOP IT!" Zim shook his head from side to side rebelliously. "I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME ZIM! YOU'RE NOT WEARING THAT THING!"
Zim's face began to turn a bright red as he continued to hold his breath.
"........"
"........"
"......ALL RIGHT YOU CAN WEAR THE HORRIBLE DISGUISE! JUST BREATH!" Zim let out a huge gasp of air and began to breath once more.
"Thank you mother for being mature for two seconds about this." Zim's mother sighed as she left the room, leaving Zim to try on the ridiculously hideous invader costume which was purple.
"That was silly!" Gir said with a smile, eyes blue once more.
"Yes it was, but now I will reveal the second part of my plan." Zim took off a large blanket which was covering his other master work. Gir looked at the contraption to see a long line of miniature planets stacked in a row.
"You're gonna chuck balls at him?"
"Of course not, that would ruin his social life. ZING!" Zim made a zing motion with his hands *if you do not know what this motion is it's one hand slapping against the other and sliding forward.* and held the position for a good minute or two. "But I jest."
"I digest!"
"Don't we all, Gir? But anyway, as you can see, I have created a device that is able to actually move the planets within the Irken Solar System. That's when I'll have him."
"Meeeaaannniiinnnggg?" Gir asked.
"Meaning that Irk is about to have a galactic equinox a few centuries early. HEHEHAHAHAHAHA!"
"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE......eguobots." The two laughed into the night.
"JESUS H CHRIST!" Dib cried out as he ducked and rolled outside of the large Irken building as it exploded into thousands of pieces. Pieces of shrapnel and parts of the building came raining down as Dib stood up and brushed off his jacket. "*whew* Another one bites the dust eh Dir?"
"........"
"HOLY CRAP DIR! YOU'RE STINKING DRUNK!" Dib pointed his finger of accusation at Dir who had obviously been caught in the blast.
"........"
"Well we'll have an intervention for you later but for now, thanks for using that ability I gave you to blow up buildings and such using some common everyday lamp shades and oxy cream. I never knew if you mixed those two together, placed them on a garbage can and threw that garbage can into a building, it would explode."
*Now, here's what really happened at this building and the number of other buildings that Dib has "taken out"*
15 minutes earlier......
"Dude it so doesn't make the building explode when you press it." One Irken guard said to another eyeing a big button which said 'SELF DESTRUCT BUTTON FOR BUILDING!'
"Oh yeah!" The other guard said in reply. "Well my dad says that it does, he knew this guy across the street who thought just like you and he ended up blowing up the building!"
"Aahh you're dad's full of it, I'm gonna press it!" Other Irken guard throws up his hands in defeat and watches as first guard hits the button making the building explode. *AND YES, THIS IS HOW IT HAPPENED WORD FOR WORD IN EVERY BUILDING!*
THE PRESENT.........
"Wow, that was weird." Dib thought to himself.
"YET INFORMATIVE!" Dir cried out in reply, Dib giving him the evil eye to keep the inanimate object quiet.
"Ok, so that makes 4 buildings in the last week. At this rate, I should be able to blow up Irk in about......1346 years. Excellent, it all goes according to plan." Dib quickly grabbed Dir and brought them both into the shadows as the Irken police showed up on the scene.
"Hey you." Dib spun around fast to see a small Irken standing behind him.
"OH CRAP! GET HIM DIR!" Dib threw the large garbage can at the Invader, causing the small green creature to be flipped around and knock into a nearby wall, teeth first.
"AAAAAAA! MO TOOTH!" The Irken cried as many of his teeth were now knocked out.
"EAT YOUR OWN BRAND OF JUSTICE......Irko..??..!" Dir sighed as Dib stood over the creature.
"I'M NOB AB IRKAN!" The Invader gummed out.
"What? I can't understand toothless people. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.... Get it? Cause you got no teeth."
The Invader held up his finger as to make Dib pause, took out a sheet of paper and a pen and began to write. Once he finished, he gave the paper to Dib to read.
"Let me see... 'I am not an Invader. I am part of the underground alliance in which Random was a part of. We are called: Preventers Of Oppresion and Persecution by Irken Eradicators. Otherwise known as Opperation P.O.O.P.I.E....?" The toothless alien in disguise nodded as Dib couldn't help but chuckle.
"POOPIE?" Dib asked as the small creature nodded. "Oh well, I've heard worse I guess."
"COB WIT MO!" The alien in disguise gummed out.
"What?"
"*sigh*" The alien then motioned to Dib to follow him and so he did.
"GIR!" Zim yelled out at the small robot. "PUT ON YOUR DISGUISE ALREADY!"
"Okee dokee!" Gir replied as he looked up at Zim in the horrible costume and began to put on his own Invader costume.
"Now remember Gir, I shall be known as Invader Purple and you shall be Invader Pink."
"Ohhhhh why do I have to be Invader Pink?" Gir said in a whiney tone.
"BECAUSE YOU'RE A...."
"Will you be out late then Zim?" His mother interrupting a very funny movie quote.
"Yes mother. I swear, must you be on me for everything?"
"Oh I guess Zim has grown up and doesn't need his mother anymore. Well I'm sorry mister as long as you live under my roof you have to follow my rules." Zim walked over to his mother and began to pour water into one of her openings. "AAAAAkkkkkk....French noodle ppaaassttrryyyy..."
"That should do it." Zim said dusting off his hands and watching his mother shut down. "I'll fix her up later, and then program her to make me some pop tarts."
"Mmmmmmmmm."
"Mmmmmm indeed Gir, mmmmmm indeed."
Dib and the member of P.O.O.P.I.E arrived at a large abandoned building. It was barely holding itself together and seemed to be a disaster waiting to happen.
"What are we doing here?" Dib asked.
The young alien stuck up his finger and pushed a small button on the front of the dismantled door. A trap door opened underneath the two and jettisoned them through a large tube. For several minutes, they fell and then finally...
"Welcome back G8&$*E)DMFHJDHKF.....Bob. I see that you were able to get the one Random kept mouthing off about. Good work." The alien who greeted the two said.
"THUD YOU." The toothless G8&$*E)DMFHJDHKF.....Bob tried to say.
"GOOD LORD! You've lost your teeth! Well you know how adamant we are on oral hygene soooooo..." The alien snapped his fingers as two large guards ran through the crowd and took the now screaming....ok lets just call him Bob all right I don't feel like typing all the letters. I GOT WAY IN OVER MY HEAD ALL RIGHT?..... Bob outside. Dib cringed in horror as he heard two gun shots in the distance.
"Ummmmmm I think I'll be going now."
"Nonsense, proper introductions are needed." The alien, who was obviously the leader of P.O.O.P.I.E, wrapped his tentacle around Dib's shoulder. He was a creature who was entirely made up of tentacles with a small little face on each one of his slimy appendages.
"Please don't touch me, you sicken me." Dib said as he carefully picked off one of the tentacles.
"Oh sorry. Anyway, my name is Sloppy Joe and I am the feared leader of our organization."
"......My name's Dib. You realize there's a sandwich named after you where I'm from?"
"Hmmmm Is this sandwich made of good things?"
"No. Actually its made of Pig ass and rat bits mixed together in a blender and poured in between two stale buns."
"...........Where are you from again?" Sloppy Joe took out a pad with the sentence 'World I need to Destroy' written on the top.
"Eart......MARS!"
"HEY!" A martian cried out as Dib tried to hide from his sight.
"Very well." Sloppy Joe finished writing down Mars and put away his notepad. "I have heard very good things about you Dib. If you would do us the honor and stay for our meeting, I'm sure you will see that we are coming ever closer to destroying Irk."
"Are you really?" Dib whispered into Joe's ear.
"......No ma'am." Joe whispered back sadly. "But anyway, please mingle with some of the other operatives here. Our meeting will begin soon."
"Fair enough." Dib said as Sloppy slithered away. Looking around the room, Dib found himself horrified by the appearance of many of the aliens which surrounded him. That is until he saw an unbelievably ravishing woman who looked human enough standing next to the food table. His jaw nearly dropped to the floor as he found the nerve to walk up to her. "Hey there baby, whats your sign?"
The ravishing alien looked down at Dib.
"I am Navelent and I have waded through the blood of my own people. My family's skulls were crushed in before my very eyes. My puppy's legs were broken off and his upper torso was used as if it were a car in a puppet show for amusement purposes. I had to kill my way out of an Irken firing squad using only some scotch tape and Bisquick. My visage is feared throughout the Irken empire and I plan to kill as many of those little green freaks as I possibly can. I SHALL KILL THEM ALL!"
"....... My name's Dib. I dress myself." Dib said confidently as he pushed his hair back with his hand and shot her a smile. Before Navelent could dispose of Dib, Sloppy Joe called the meeting to order.
"I call this meeting to order just like the author said I would, but before we start we must recite our oath!"
"Oath?" Dib questioned.
Every alien, save Dib that is, held up their toes which had poop colored rings on the end of them and held them up to what seemed to be a large toilet which shined a poopy light in the middle of the room.
"IN BRIGHTEST DAY!" All of the aliens yelled together. "IN BLACKEST NIGHT! NO IRKEN SHALL ESCAPE OUR SIGHT! LET THOSE WHO WORSHIP IRKEN'S MIGHT! BEWARE OUR POWER, POOPIE'S LIGHT!"
"...... That was the most retarded oath I've ever heard."
"What are you supposed to be?" A large guard asked the small mysterious figure on the outside of the meeting.
"I..." Zim took off his mysterious hood of mysterious mystery .....mystery. "am Invader Purple."
"I'm Pink!" Gir replied back.
End Chapter 13
OOOOOOOOOOO *cough* OOOOOOOOOOO! What does P.O.O.P.I.E have in store for Dib? Will Zim be granted entrance? Is Gir really worthy of the name Pink and what does that say about the way he swings? Why doesn't my girlfriend look like Navelent....*gets slapped over the head by GORGEOUS girlfriend* she looks BETTER....YEP!....SURE DOES!....QUESTION MARK!
Find this out and much more in.....
Chapter 14: KICK ZIM IN THE NARDS!
Peace!
Fillerbunny: *Shown with a gun in his mouth about to pull the trigger*
Oh no, none of that now! *author pulls away large shotgun to Bunny's dismay.*
F.B.: NO! I WAS SO CLOSE! WHY CAN'T YOU LET ME CEASE TO BE?
Because you're too funny and you have not served me to the fullest yet.
F.B.: *reaches for shotgun cartridge and begins to bang it against the side of his head, hoping it would have the same affect as being fired out of a barrel.*
Now that's just sad. *snatches away cartridge*
F.B.: I've been alive for 200 YEARS! WHY CAN'T I REST IN PEACE?
That's enough, Do your job! *kicks bunny in front of the audience.*
F.B.: Sigh... *happy smile instantly comes on his face* WHEEE TIME FOR FUN!....sigh *begins doing a happy jig*
Gotta love those jigs.
F.B.: WATCH AS I CLIMB THE ANDIES! *climbs Andies* BUNGEE JUMP OFF THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE! *bungee jumps* WRITE A STORY ABOUT ZIM! *begins to write the story, then takes the pen and jams it into his throat*
NOOO! I TOLD YOU ALREADY NONE OF THAT! *takes pen out of Bunny's neck and heals it up*
F.B.: Soooo close *begins to cry*
Ok, you've reached me. I'll let you die now.
F.B.: REALLY? *becomes very happy*
Sure. Here. *hands Filler Bunny two pills.*
F.B.: What are these?
Cyanide pills. They'll kill you instantly.
F.B.: YIPEE! *Downs the pills*
*snicker*
F.B.: What are you laughing at? *looks down to see he's still alive* WHY AREN'T I DYING??
I pulled a trick on you Mister Bunny. Those were two highly effective laxatives, the only way you're gonna die is on the stool! AAAHAHAHA!
F.B.: NOOO! *stomach begins to rumble and runs into the bathroom. Loud, deafening "stool" noises can be heard in the background.*
Well that was fun. Don't worry kids, even if he does die in there, we'll just regenerate him back to his old self.
F.B.: NOOOOOOOOO! *more "stool" noises. The wall next to him reads: "Call Jhonen Vasquez for a good time, he owns all this stuff."
Enjoy!
Chapter 13: DIB VS IRK.....IN MADISON SQUARE GARDEN*
*Last part is void.
"In the past week," The Irken reporter was stating off of the television screen which Zim was glued to. "there have been an unseemingly large number of explosions and what seem to be attacks being made on very large complexes and military bases throughout the area."
"Dib." Zim said in a low voice, Gir dancing behind him.
"These events seem to stem from the disappearance of Invader Ima, one of Irk's greatest invaders. Is there a connection to be found between these two occurences?"
"Yessss." Zim whispered with a smile on his face, nodding his head up and down waiting for the reporter to state the obvious.
"OF COURSE NOT! HAHAHAHAHAHA! THAT WOULD BE RIDICULOUS!" The reporter's camera crew could be heard laughing hysterically in the background as Zim picked up Gir and threw him through the screen.
"BLAST IT! AM I THE ONLY INVADER ON THE PLANET TO SEE DIB FOR WHAT HE TRULY IS?"
"I miss Ima." Gir said as he climbed out of what was left of the television. "I also miss bellbottoms.....DISCO FEVER!"
"Quiet Gir! I need complete silence to put two of my most ingenious plans into fruition."
"I like fruition, its comes in a can." As Gir stated the fact that he liked fruition, Zim continued to tinker on one of his two diabolical projects to help him bring down Dib. "Whatcha makin?"
"Funny you should ask Gir. With this last smelt of the blowtorch aaaannndddd...THERE!" Zim put down the large blowtorch with which he was molding *I like to say molding, its randy!* and marveled at his latest creation. "By the prickings of my thumb, I have made a major discovery."
"That thumb pricking hurts?" Gir asked.
"Well yes, that and that Dib must be hiding away with others races who are disguising themselves as Invaders or will meet them within the confines of this chapter, whatever works."
"......Ya lost me!" Gir cried out.
"What I need to do is disguise myself as an Irken Invader thereby getting access to the underground.....thingey!"
Gir's eyes flashed to red causing him to revert back to his smart side for a few seconds. "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard in my entire life."
"The robot's right dear." Zim's mother butted in. "Why disguise yourself as something you already are, and that costume is just horrible looking, it looks nothing like an Irken Invader. I've never seen an Invader who was purple before."
"I couldn't find any green....BUT NEVERTHELESS!"
"Nevertheless what?"
".....III WAAANNTT TOOO WEAR IT!" Zim said beginning a tantrum.
"Honey, I'm putting my hand down on this one."
"I'm gonna hold my breath until I die if I can't wear it!" Zim then took in a big grasp of air, expanded his cheeks and held his breath.
"ZIM! ZIM STOP IT! STOP IT!" Zim shook his head from side to side rebelliously. "I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME ZIM! YOU'RE NOT WEARING THAT THING!"
Zim's face began to turn a bright red as he continued to hold his breath.
"........"
"........"
"......ALL RIGHT YOU CAN WEAR THE HORRIBLE DISGUISE! JUST BREATH!" Zim let out a huge gasp of air and began to breath once more.
"Thank you mother for being mature for two seconds about this." Zim's mother sighed as she left the room, leaving Zim to try on the ridiculously hideous invader costume which was purple.
"That was silly!" Gir said with a smile, eyes blue once more.
"Yes it was, but now I will reveal the second part of my plan." Zim took off a large blanket which was covering his other master work. Gir looked at the contraption to see a long line of miniature planets stacked in a row.
"You're gonna chuck balls at him?"
"Of course not, that would ruin his social life. ZING!" Zim made a zing motion with his hands *if you do not know what this motion is it's one hand slapping against the other and sliding forward.* and held the position for a good minute or two. "But I jest."
"I digest!"
"Don't we all, Gir? But anyway, as you can see, I have created a device that is able to actually move the planets within the Irken Solar System. That's when I'll have him."
"Meeeaaannniiinnnggg?" Gir asked.
"Meaning that Irk is about to have a galactic equinox a few centuries early. HEHEHAHAHAHAHA!"
"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE......eguobots." The two laughed into the night.
"JESUS H CHRIST!" Dib cried out as he ducked and rolled outside of the large Irken building as it exploded into thousands of pieces. Pieces of shrapnel and parts of the building came raining down as Dib stood up and brushed off his jacket. "*whew* Another one bites the dust eh Dir?"
"........"
"HOLY CRAP DIR! YOU'RE STINKING DRUNK!" Dib pointed his finger of accusation at Dir who had obviously been caught in the blast.
"........"
"Well we'll have an intervention for you later but for now, thanks for using that ability I gave you to blow up buildings and such using some common everyday lamp shades and oxy cream. I never knew if you mixed those two together, placed them on a garbage can and threw that garbage can into a building, it would explode."
*Now, here's what really happened at this building and the number of other buildings that Dib has "taken out"*
15 minutes earlier......
"Dude it so doesn't make the building explode when you press it." One Irken guard said to another eyeing a big button which said 'SELF DESTRUCT BUTTON FOR BUILDING!'
"Oh yeah!" The other guard said in reply. "Well my dad says that it does, he knew this guy across the street who thought just like you and he ended up blowing up the building!"
"Aahh you're dad's full of it, I'm gonna press it!" Other Irken guard throws up his hands in defeat and watches as first guard hits the button making the building explode. *AND YES, THIS IS HOW IT HAPPENED WORD FOR WORD IN EVERY BUILDING!*
THE PRESENT.........
"Wow, that was weird." Dib thought to himself.
"YET INFORMATIVE!" Dir cried out in reply, Dib giving him the evil eye to keep the inanimate object quiet.
"Ok, so that makes 4 buildings in the last week. At this rate, I should be able to blow up Irk in about......1346 years. Excellent, it all goes according to plan." Dib quickly grabbed Dir and brought them both into the shadows as the Irken police showed up on the scene.
"Hey you." Dib spun around fast to see a small Irken standing behind him.
"OH CRAP! GET HIM DIR!" Dib threw the large garbage can at the Invader, causing the small green creature to be flipped around and knock into a nearby wall, teeth first.
"AAAAAAA! MO TOOTH!" The Irken cried as many of his teeth were now knocked out.
"EAT YOUR OWN BRAND OF JUSTICE......Irko..??..!" Dir sighed as Dib stood over the creature.
"I'M NOB AB IRKAN!" The Invader gummed out.
"What? I can't understand toothless people. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.... Get it? Cause you got no teeth."
The Invader held up his finger as to make Dib pause, took out a sheet of paper and a pen and began to write. Once he finished, he gave the paper to Dib to read.
"Let me see... 'I am not an Invader. I am part of the underground alliance in which Random was a part of. We are called: Preventers Of Oppresion and Persecution by Irken Eradicators. Otherwise known as Opperation P.O.O.P.I.E....?" The toothless alien in disguise nodded as Dib couldn't help but chuckle.
"POOPIE?" Dib asked as the small creature nodded. "Oh well, I've heard worse I guess."
"COB WIT MO!" The alien in disguise gummed out.
"What?"
"*sigh*" The alien then motioned to Dib to follow him and so he did.
"GIR!" Zim yelled out at the small robot. "PUT ON YOUR DISGUISE ALREADY!"
"Okee dokee!" Gir replied as he looked up at Zim in the horrible costume and began to put on his own Invader costume.
"Now remember Gir, I shall be known as Invader Purple and you shall be Invader Pink."
"Ohhhhh why do I have to be Invader Pink?" Gir said in a whiney tone.
"BECAUSE YOU'RE A...."
"Will you be out late then Zim?" His mother interrupting a very funny movie quote.
"Yes mother. I swear, must you be on me for everything?"
"Oh I guess Zim has grown up and doesn't need his mother anymore. Well I'm sorry mister as long as you live under my roof you have to follow my rules." Zim walked over to his mother and began to pour water into one of her openings. "AAAAAkkkkkk....French noodle ppaaassttrryyyy..."
"That should do it." Zim said dusting off his hands and watching his mother shut down. "I'll fix her up later, and then program her to make me some pop tarts."
"Mmmmmmmmm."
"Mmmmmm indeed Gir, mmmmmm indeed."
Dib and the member of P.O.O.P.I.E arrived at a large abandoned building. It was barely holding itself together and seemed to be a disaster waiting to happen.
"What are we doing here?" Dib asked.
The young alien stuck up his finger and pushed a small button on the front of the dismantled door. A trap door opened underneath the two and jettisoned them through a large tube. For several minutes, they fell and then finally...
"Welcome back G8&$*E)DMFHJDHKF.....Bob. I see that you were able to get the one Random kept mouthing off about. Good work." The alien who greeted the two said.
"THUD YOU." The toothless G8&$*E)DMFHJDHKF.....Bob tried to say.
"GOOD LORD! You've lost your teeth! Well you know how adamant we are on oral hygene soooooo..." The alien snapped his fingers as two large guards ran through the crowd and took the now screaming....ok lets just call him Bob all right I don't feel like typing all the letters. I GOT WAY IN OVER MY HEAD ALL RIGHT?..... Bob outside. Dib cringed in horror as he heard two gun shots in the distance.
"Ummmmmm I think I'll be going now."
"Nonsense, proper introductions are needed." The alien, who was obviously the leader of P.O.O.P.I.E, wrapped his tentacle around Dib's shoulder. He was a creature who was entirely made up of tentacles with a small little face on each one of his slimy appendages.
"Please don't touch me, you sicken me." Dib said as he carefully picked off one of the tentacles.
"Oh sorry. Anyway, my name is Sloppy Joe and I am the feared leader of our organization."
"......My name's Dib. You realize there's a sandwich named after you where I'm from?"
"Hmmmm Is this sandwich made of good things?"
"No. Actually its made of Pig ass and rat bits mixed together in a blender and poured in between two stale buns."
"...........Where are you from again?" Sloppy Joe took out a pad with the sentence 'World I need to Destroy' written on the top.
"Eart......MARS!"
"HEY!" A martian cried out as Dib tried to hide from his sight.
"Very well." Sloppy Joe finished writing down Mars and put away his notepad. "I have heard very good things about you Dib. If you would do us the honor and stay for our meeting, I'm sure you will see that we are coming ever closer to destroying Irk."
"Are you really?" Dib whispered into Joe's ear.
"......No ma'am." Joe whispered back sadly. "But anyway, please mingle with some of the other operatives here. Our meeting will begin soon."
"Fair enough." Dib said as Sloppy slithered away. Looking around the room, Dib found himself horrified by the appearance of many of the aliens which surrounded him. That is until he saw an unbelievably ravishing woman who looked human enough standing next to the food table. His jaw nearly dropped to the floor as he found the nerve to walk up to her. "Hey there baby, whats your sign?"
The ravishing alien looked down at Dib.
"I am Navelent and I have waded through the blood of my own people. My family's skulls were crushed in before my very eyes. My puppy's legs were broken off and his upper torso was used as if it were a car in a puppet show for amusement purposes. I had to kill my way out of an Irken firing squad using only some scotch tape and Bisquick. My visage is feared throughout the Irken empire and I plan to kill as many of those little green freaks as I possibly can. I SHALL KILL THEM ALL!"
"....... My name's Dib. I dress myself." Dib said confidently as he pushed his hair back with his hand and shot her a smile. Before Navelent could dispose of Dib, Sloppy Joe called the meeting to order.
"I call this meeting to order just like the author said I would, but before we start we must recite our oath!"
"Oath?" Dib questioned.
Every alien, save Dib that is, held up their toes which had poop colored rings on the end of them and held them up to what seemed to be a large toilet which shined a poopy light in the middle of the room.
"IN BRIGHTEST DAY!" All of the aliens yelled together. "IN BLACKEST NIGHT! NO IRKEN SHALL ESCAPE OUR SIGHT! LET THOSE WHO WORSHIP IRKEN'S MIGHT! BEWARE OUR POWER, POOPIE'S LIGHT!"
"...... That was the most retarded oath I've ever heard."
"What are you supposed to be?" A large guard asked the small mysterious figure on the outside of the meeting.
"I..." Zim took off his mysterious hood of mysterious mystery .....mystery. "am Invader Purple."
"I'm Pink!" Gir replied back.
End Chapter 13
OOOOOOOOOOO *cough* OOOOOOOOOOO! What does P.O.O.P.I.E have in store for Dib? Will Zim be granted entrance? Is Gir really worthy of the name Pink and what does that say about the way he swings? Why doesn't my girlfriend look like Navelent....*gets slapped over the head by GORGEOUS girlfriend* she looks BETTER....YEP!....SURE DOES!....QUESTION MARK!
Find this out and much more in.....
Chapter 14: KICK ZIM IN THE NARDS!
Peace!