Disclaimer: I don't own any of the original Harry Potter characters. Ren is my own creation, however. You must ask me before using him! Also, please don't sue me. I have very little money.
*
Harry, at least, was tired of Ren hugging him and everybody he knew (except Snape) from behind and whispering strange things into their ears. The strange, perverted third year boy had already glomped him alone two hundred sixty-eight times, which might have explained his less-than-pleased reaction when he reached two hundred sixty-nine.
A pair of arms clasped around his waist and a boy's voice whispered in his ear: "Harry-kun, let's go play 'Hide the disgusting object in peoples' underwear.' "
The fifth year celebrity shuddered at the thought and dropped the book he was trying to hide behind.
"LEAVE ME ALONE, YOU SICK, TWISTED, DISGUSTING PERVERT!" he screamed, earning himself a glare from Madam Pince.
The younger boy let go of his... 'friend' and backed away, looking hurt. "Why, Harry, I thought you liked me..."
"I'm not like that! I don't appreciate you... you... groping me! In fact, I don't think anybody does! And stop sneaking up to my dormitory at night! It's creepy!"
"You're not the only person to say that... Hermione tried to beat me to death with a heavy book."
"Just leave everybody alone! And stop hanging around in the Gryffindor common room! you're a Slytherin! Go hang out with THEM!"
"But Snape scares me..."
"I don't care! Just go away!"
Harry shut his eyes, blinking, and opened them to find Ren gone. He noticed a large, ominous shadow looming over him, so he turned around, to find a very angry Madam Pince.
"Be quiet or you're banned from the library!"
"Yes, ma'am!" he squeaked as he picked up a book and buried his face in it.
*
A few days later, Ren managed to get himself expelled for hugging Malfoy while Snape was nearby.
Owari!
Moral of this odd story: Ren's a pervert, and even Malfoy deserves better that to be pestered by him. He's lucky he didn't upset Neville, or else I'd- (This has been censored because there's too much violence in the world. Please forget this story, as it may give you nightmares.)