Sam and Ivy are outside the Book Cafe.
"Hey, do you have any gum?" He asks.
"Oh? Yeah! Sure!"
Beth runs out, "Wait! Wait! Hi! Listen, Sam can I just talk to you for a second?"
"Oh but Beth, we're gonna be late for the movie." Ivy says.
A cab pulls up.
"Oh, there's a cab! Taxi!!" The cab stops and Beth opens the door, "Good timing, my God, huh? Here you go." She pushes Ivy in and closes the door.
"Yeah, we're, we're actually gonna walk 'cause it's right down the street." She says out of the cab window.
"Oh, down the street!! Go! Go!" Beth bangs on the cab's roof and it pulls away, "You didn't get the annulment?!!"
"I know."
"Sam?!"
"Well, I tried! But when I got to my lawyer's office all I could here was, 'Two divorces. Two divorces!' Look, I just don't want my tombstone to read, 'Sam Bennett, Two Divorces'." He explains.
"Don't be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say! It could say, 'Sam Bennett, Good at Marriage'! Mine's gonna say 'Elizabeth Wallace, Buried Alive'."
"So okay what? You're gonna be married to a woman who doesn't even know about it?!" She asks.
"Well, okay so, I don't have it all worked out quite yet. Just don't say anything to Ivy, please?"
"Ivy is one of my closest friends." Beth pauses, "Although, being the only one who knows anything about this does make me feel special. Okay!"
Ivy's cab backs up.
"Okay, stop-stop! Beth?!" She says.
"Hey Ivy!"
"What was that?!"
"Sorry, mix up. Hey, how was the movie?" Beth asks.
"I haven't seen it yet!"
"Well then you'd better hurry! Down the street! Go! Go!" She bangs on the roof again and of they go.
"Noooooooo!!"
~*~
Luis and Sheridan are cuddling on the couch.
"When we move in together, can I get a gumball machine?" He asks.
"Of course! Hank wouldn't let you have one?"
"No. When it comes to sweets, he's surprisingly strict." Luis explains.
"Hey, have you figured out a way to tell him you're moving out?" Sheridan asks.
"No, no, I keep trying. I can get out, 'Hank, I have to...', but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, '... Go to the bathroom.' He may think I'm sick."
"I really have to tell Ivy, but I... We just have to get it over with! The next time we see them we're just gonna tell them. Okay? That's it."
Hank enters, "Hey Sheridan!"
"Hi!"
He looks at Luis, "Hey man, you feeling any better?"
Luis answers him with some guttural sounds.
"Hank, we have something to tell you." Sheridan says.
"Oh my God! You're pregnant!" He gasps.
"No-o-o!" Luis looks at Sheridan, "No?" She nods no. "No-o-o! Look Hank, here's the thing, Sheridan and I have decided to live together, here. So, I'm gonna be moving out, man."
"Wow!" Hank starts tearing up, "Well, uh... Hey! I'm really happy for you guys! Congratulations!" He kisses Sheridan on the cheek, "See you later." He starts for the door on the verge of tears.
Sheridan stops him, "Wait! Hank! Hank! Are you okay?!"
He looks at Sheridan, "Okay! Look-look-look, uh, if you're gonna be moving in with him I feel it's my responsibility to tell you the truth about him! Okay? He's a terrible roommate! He uh, forget to umm... Oh-oh, he always, he always umm. Oh, who am I kidding! He's the best roommate ever!" He hugs Luis.
~*~
"Hey, do you have any gum?" He asks.
"Oh? Yeah! Sure!"
Beth runs out, "Wait! Wait! Hi! Listen, Sam can I just talk to you for a second?"
"Oh but Beth, we're gonna be late for the movie." Ivy says.
A cab pulls up.
"Oh, there's a cab! Taxi!!" The cab stops and Beth opens the door, "Good timing, my God, huh? Here you go." She pushes Ivy in and closes the door.
"Yeah, we're, we're actually gonna walk 'cause it's right down the street." She says out of the cab window.
"Oh, down the street!! Go! Go!" Beth bangs on the cab's roof and it pulls away, "You didn't get the annulment?!!"
"I know."
"Sam?!"
"Well, I tried! But when I got to my lawyer's office all I could here was, 'Two divorces. Two divorces!' Look, I just don't want my tombstone to read, 'Sam Bennett, Two Divorces'." He explains.
"Don't be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say! It could say, 'Sam Bennett, Good at Marriage'! Mine's gonna say 'Elizabeth Wallace, Buried Alive'."
"So okay what? You're gonna be married to a woman who doesn't even know about it?!" She asks.
"Well, okay so, I don't have it all worked out quite yet. Just don't say anything to Ivy, please?"
"Ivy is one of my closest friends." Beth pauses, "Although, being the only one who knows anything about this does make me feel special. Okay!"
Ivy's cab backs up.
"Okay, stop-stop! Beth?!" She says.
"Hey Ivy!"
"What was that?!"
"Sorry, mix up. Hey, how was the movie?" Beth asks.
"I haven't seen it yet!"
"Well then you'd better hurry! Down the street! Go! Go!" She bangs on the roof again and of they go.
"Noooooooo!!"
~*~
Luis and Sheridan are cuddling on the couch.
"When we move in together, can I get a gumball machine?" He asks.
"Of course! Hank wouldn't let you have one?"
"No. When it comes to sweets, he's surprisingly strict." Luis explains.
"Hey, have you figured out a way to tell him you're moving out?" Sheridan asks.
"No, no, I keep trying. I can get out, 'Hank, I have to...', but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, '... Go to the bathroom.' He may think I'm sick."
"I really have to tell Ivy, but I... We just have to get it over with! The next time we see them we're just gonna tell them. Okay? That's it."
Hank enters, "Hey Sheridan!"
"Hi!"
He looks at Luis, "Hey man, you feeling any better?"
Luis answers him with some guttural sounds.
"Hank, we have something to tell you." Sheridan says.
"Oh my God! You're pregnant!" He gasps.
"No-o-o!" Luis looks at Sheridan, "No?" She nods no. "No-o-o! Look Hank, here's the thing, Sheridan and I have decided to live together, here. So, I'm gonna be moving out, man."
"Wow!" Hank starts tearing up, "Well, uh... Hey! I'm really happy for you guys! Congratulations!" He kisses Sheridan on the cheek, "See you later." He starts for the door on the verge of tears.
Sheridan stops him, "Wait! Hank! Hank! Are you okay?!"
He looks at Sheridan, "Okay! Look-look-look, uh, if you're gonna be moving in with him I feel it's my responsibility to tell you the truth about him! Okay? He's a terrible roommate! He uh, forget to umm... Oh-oh, he always, he always umm. Oh, who am I kidding! He's the best roommate ever!" He hugs Luis.
~*~