I've haven't been writing any stories lately, and here's why: I've been too busy playing Castlevania, SOTN. But I made something of it...
Vile6666 productions presents:
FINAL FANTASY 7
SYMPHONY OF THE NIGHT
It was many years after the banishment of Sephiroth. Peace finally exisisted for all. Little did they know that the tranquility would soon be broken. Cloud and Vincent enjoy drinks at a local bar. Suddenly a strange man walks it. He eyes the room, pauses, and sits next to the two men.
Mysterious Man: Are you Cloud and Vincent?
Cloud: Yeah.
Mysterious Man: My name is Adrian Farenheights Tepes.
Butthead: Huh huh huh, you said TP
Adrian: No, that's not how you pronounce it!
Cloud: How DO you pronounce it?
Adrian: Tepes.
Vincent: Oh!
Cloud: So, what do you want?
Adrian: Your world is in great danger.
Vincent: Not interested.
Adrian: But you must!
Cloud: Been there, done that.
Adrian: I'll give you a free sports watch.
Cloud: Count me in!
Vincent: Alright, Mr. Celsius! I'm in too.
Adrian: That's Farenheights.
Vincent: Kelvin?
Adrian: Just call me Alucard.
Cloud: Call me Ishmael.
Alucard: Just shut up and follow me.
Alucard leads Cloud and Vincent to a large rocky clearing.
Cloud: This is IT?
Alucard: Hmmm(looks at his watch) its late.
Cloud and Vincent walk a few feet away and whisper behind Alucard's back.
Cloud: This Celsius guy…
Alucard: Farenheights.
Cloud: Yeah, whatever. He just seems so…weird.
Vincent: He never shows any emotions.
Cloud: Like Ben Stein.
Vincent: Win Alucard's Money!
Alucard: Ah, here it comes.
Suddenly the sky opens up and a beam of menacing light shines down on the rocky surface. A huge castle materializes itself.
Cloud: Whoa!
Vincent takes a picture.
The castle finishes materializing. Except its upside down.
Alucard: Man! That's the second time this happened!
Voice from Above: Sorry!
The castle flips around the right way.
Alucard: This way.
As the three walk in, they are immediately attacked by skeletons, zombies, and undead warriors. Alucard fights them off. Cloud and Vincent just stand there.
Alucard: What are you guys doing? Help me here!
Cloud: We're waiting for our turn.
Alucard: You don't need to wait your turn! Just fight!
Cloud: Alright…
Cloud and Vincent fight the monsters. However, this being their first time fighting moving targets, they miss almost every shot.
Cloud: Man, why can't these battles be like real life, where everyone waits their turn and stands still!
Vincent: Yeah, this fighting is totally unrealistic!
The three fight their way through the castle.
Vincent: Man, I'm beat. Where's the beds in this place?
Alucard: This way.
Alucard takes them to a Save Point coffin.
Vincent: Alright! This place has EVERYTHING!
Vincent jumps into the coffin. Alucard pulls him out.
Alucard: I believe that's MY coffin.
Vincent: You had it last!
Alucard: You were sleeping for 4 years!
Vincent: Yeah, you were sleeping for 400 years!
Alucard: Yeah, but that's in vampire years.
Cloud: Just shut up and get to sleep.
The next morning, our adventures awake with vigor, ready to explore the vast new castle before them. Well, everyone except Vincent and Alucard, who couldn't stop arguing, and Cloud, who couldn't sleep because of the noise. But everyone else slept nicely!
Alucard: We're headed for the throne room. I think we can meet him there.
The three men fight their way to the throne room. No one is there.
Alucard: He should be here!
Cloud: Who?
Vincent: Hey, there's a note:
Gone ressurectin'
-Shaft
Cloud: Oh no! We're being attacked by Isaac Hayes!
Alucard: No, not THAT Shaft! The dark priest of Dracula!
Cloud: There's a difference?
Alucard: Hmm. I think I know where I can meet him.
The three men travel to the huge clock chamber.
Alucard: Now, I'll just use these Gold and Silver rings and…..damn
Cloud: What?
Alucard: I left them in my other cape! You guys stay right here, I'll be right back!
Cloud: This is bad. We're stuck in this huge castle, we don't understand this fighting system, and we have no clue what's going on.
Vincent: What can we do?
The two men think for a while.
Cloud: Go fish!
Vincent: Good idea!
They take out cards and start playing.
Meanwhile, at a local graveyard.
Shaft: You say that you found the body of Count Dracula, Igor?
Igor: That's 'I'gor.
Shaft: Whatever Igo…uh, 'I'gor.
'I'gor: Walk this way.
'I'gor walks hunched down a flight of stairs. Shaft follows him.
'I'gor: No, walk THIS way.
Shaft: I've seen that movie already.
Back in the castle…
Vincent: Go fish!
Cloud: Dammit!
Vincent: Say, where's that Celsius guy?
Alucard(from far away): FARENHEIGHTS!!!!
Cloud: Hey, someone's coming.
Shaft: Hahaha! Those fools know nothing!
Vincent: Quick, hide!
Shaft walks in, carrying Dracula's body. He commands a secret door to open, and jumps down through the opening.
Cloud(whispering): Lets follow him!
Cloud and Vincent follow Shaft, who is placing Dracula in front of an eye on the wall.
Shaft: Let the ressurection begin!
Lighting and fire blaze around the room. Beams of lights shoot out in all directions. Suddenly, the frankenstein monster appears, roaring.
Shaft: Not YOU! I'm ressurection Count Dracula.
Frankenstein Monster: Uhh….(falls down and dies)
Shaft: Alright, Dracula Ressurection, take 2!
The same lightning and fire shoot out, and this time the real Dracula Vlad Tepes appears.
Dracula: Dammit! I was just having the best dream of my life when…
Shaft: It worked!
Dracula: I never told you to ressurect me! Let a vampire have his sleep.
Vincent: Right on!
Cloud: Shhh!!!
Shaft: But I thought you would be pleased!
Dracula: You thought wrong!
Dracula fires a bolt of energy to Shaft, who falls down and dies.
Suddenly Alucard reappears.
Alucard: Guys! I've got the rings and…(looks around). Whoa. I'll just come back tommorow.
Cloud: Hey!
Alucard: Oh, you're here!
Vincent: You came to save us!
Alucard: Yeah…….that's…what I did….
Cloud: Dracula has been ressurected!
Alucard: Dracula…..stand back. This is MY problem.
Alucard: Vlad!
Dracula: Who is it?
Alucard: Adrian
Dracula: What kind of a son are you?
Alucard: What kind of a father are you?
Dracula: What could have broken us apart?
Alucard: It was by 11th birthday. I asked for a "Super" Mecharobolizard King, and you got me the "Regular" Mecharobolizard King. For that I'll never forgive you.
Dracula: The time for being spoiled is gone. I'm afraid that I'm going to have to kill you.
Alucard: You failed last time. What makes you think you'll win this time?
Dracula: The fortune cookie says so.
Alucard: No! I won't let this happen. I must kill you!
Cloud: Family problems…
Dracula and Alucard fight each other. Dracula appears to be winning.
Alucard: Guys, help me!
Cloud: What do we do!
Alucard: I don't know! Stick a stake in his heart!
Vincent grabs a nearby stake and hits Dracula's heart with it. Nothing happens.
Alucard(choking): You idiot(gasp)…use the POINTY side(gasp).
Vincent: Oh!
Vincent hits Dracula with the stake. Nothing happens.
Dracula: Ha! I've already learned THAT trick.
Cloud: Garlic!
Vincent: Good idea!
Vincent gets a clove of garlic and throws it at Dracula, who eats it.
Dracula: Yum!
Cloud: Nothing's working!
Alucard:…help…..me….
Vincent: What can we do?
Dracula: Ah! Don't say that word!
Cloud: What word?
Dracula: Stop it!
Vincent: What are you talking about?
Dracula: Ahhh!!!!
Cloud: What's his problem?
Draclula: No no noooo!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alucard: What are you guys doing?
Dracula: You bastards!
Dracula withers away and dies.
Cloud: Did we win?
Alucard: Looks like it.
Vincent: Where's our sports watch.
Alucard: Fine. Here.
The three men leave the castle, just as it fades into nothingness.
The End