(This…. is just really weird… very very strange... Anywho, I won't be able to make another chapter for 2 weeks 'cause I'm going out of the country, but if you'd like me to continue or just have C&C, please review and I'll see what I can do. ^_^)
In the meantime, Susaku no Miko's group was in a bit of a jam.
"C'mon, it's just for one night!" Miaka whined.
"NO! NOT A CHANCE, NO WAY, NOOOOO!" Tasuki growled stubbornly. "They can't see me like this, with my damned body changing sexes every fuckin' time it rains!"
Tamahome smirked. "Ah, c'mon Tasuki-ku… chan… Your mom'll be thrilled that she has another daughter. Although with your temper, it'll be hard to find you a man…" he snickered. "Maybe you and Nuriko could…"
"URUSAI! THERE'S ONLY ONE MAN FOR ME! A real man…" Nuriko swooned and turned to Hotohori, who was too busy with a mirror shop he'd found. 'I can't decide which one I want.' He thought sadly. 'They're all so beautiful…'
Tasuki turned bright red. "Why… you…." He growled and splashed Tamahome with the water from his canteen. "YOU DIRTY RAT! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TORTURING ME!?"
Tamahome squeaked indignantly and turned his back to the angry bandit as he went on saying how he was 'still a man despite his unfortunate circumstance'.
"Aw… koi…" Miaka whimpered and sprinkled a little bit of hot water from her thermos onto the rat.
"NO MIAKA, DO-… don't na no da." Chichiri yelled. Now there was a naked Tamahome in the middle of the marketplace. Tasuki was WRITHING in laughter. Miaka blushed and went to cover as much of him as she could.
"Thank you love." He muttered, blushing. Nuriko gave Tamahome his clothes and the seishi surrounded him as he quickly dressed. All except Tasuki, of course, who couldn't stop laughing.
"Will somebody stop him no da? We've got to get going if we're to make it to a safe resting area by nightfall na no da."
"Please." Tamahome said and gave a smart smile. "Allow me." He took his canteen and with a flick of the wrist opened it and poured it's contents all over the former bandit leader, who instantly stopped laughing and glared at him with unsurpassed anger.
"I hate you."
"I know you do, sugar." Tamahome said and raised the canteen to where the present Tasuki couldn't reach. "But if I buy you flowers, you'll still take me home with you, ne?"
"WE ARE NOT STAYING AT MY HOUSE!!! I DON'T CARE IF IT'S NEAR, SAFE, OR ANY OF THAT CRAP!!! I WON'T HAVE MY FAMILY SEE ME LIKE… LIKE THIS!!!" Tasuki growled and gestured to his rather large chest. "We're not going to stay there and that's final."
"SHUN'U-CHAAAAN!!!" Tasuki's mother cried and hugged Tasuki tightly. "MY BABY BOY, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!?"
The rest of the bishonen winced. This woman was HUGE, and Tasuki struggled greatly under her top-heavy girth.
"Oi, she's bigger than YOU are Chiriko-chan…" Tamahome whispered.
Chiriko blushed. "Tamahome-saaaan… I'd rather not talk about bust sizes at the moment." Miaka had taken him clothes shopping for his female form earlier, and he'd had his fill of embarrassment for the day. Eventually he'd be speaking to a shrink about the whole fiasco, but that's another story.
"M-om…" Tasuki gasped. "Can't… BREATHE…"
"My precious baby, my only son, mommy's missed you so much!" Tasuki's mother cried happily. "You have NO idea how worried I've been! My little boy, in such dangerous work!" Finally she released him and Tasuki's face returned to it's natural color.
"Missed you too mom." He muttered, catching his breath. "So where's Aidou? Lemme guess… she's still not married, ne? Mom, you'd better do something before she's an old maid…" he said, snickering. Then there was this strange whistling sound.
*CRACK!*
Tasuki lay face down on the ground, suffering from a log to the back of the head.
"Hn… old maid… I'll show him…" Aidou muttered and picked up the fallen bandit. "IT'S A DAMN GOOD THING YOU'RE HOME! YOU'RE GONNA BE WORKING IN THE FIELDS FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK!!!"
All the men groaned. This… was DEFINITELY Tasuki's sister.
"Itaiiiiii… what'd ya do that for Aidou…" Tasuki grumbled and rubbed his head. "Still sore about bein' a vir-"
Aidou hoisted another log above her head.
"A WHAT?"
"Uh… um.. a virtuous woman? Eh hehehe…"
*WHACK!*
The young woman then turned to her 'guests' and smiled sweetly. "Oh, hello! I'm Kou Aidou, please make yourselves at home! I'll be out with some tea in a minute." She turned her attention back to Tasuki, "C'mon you miserable deadbeat!" and dragged him back into the house while the rest of the seishi stared in terror.
Miaka smiled happily and took Tamahome's arm. "She seems nice."
Everyone sweatdropped, and they all went in.
"K'so…" Tasuki muttered and dragged the plow angrily. "I hate my sisters, I hate my curse and I hate my life!" He finished around nightfall, right before dinner.
"Shun'u-chan!!! Don't think you're coming in this house dripping like a little sweatball!" Tasuki's mother said cheerfully.
"Mom, can I please come inside an' take a bath or somethin' instead?" Tasuki asked hopefully.
"NO!"
Tasuki debated the thought of going hungry and sleeping under the stars versus the possibility of his mom finding out he's a woman.
"Mom, I'm not too hungry… I'll see ya in the morning…" Tasuki muttered and sat down sadly. 'Tonight's shrimp night… I love shrimp night.' He thought and whimpered. 'Well at least I still have my digni-'
"OI, BRO!!!" Aidou said and dumped a bucket of water over his head.
'Dignity…' Tasuki thought and ran quickly into the bathroom in the house, with Aidou right on his heels.
"O-OI OI!!! WHADDYA THINK YOU'RE DOING IN HERE!?" Tamahome yelled and Tasuki grabbed him quickly.
"Kiss me asshole!" he screamed shrilly.
"Na-NANI!? ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME YOU PSYCHO!?"
Tasuki pressed his lips to Tamahome who was fighting to get the crazy bandit off him.
"Oh… I'm sorry… I heard a scream and…" Aidou said blushing, thinking she'd interrupted her 'sister' and one of their guests. "Have you seen Shun'u around here?" Tamahome realized what was going on, probably faster than a main character should, and answered.
"Ano… no Shun'u said he was gonna take a bath…"
Aidou shrugged and left while Tasuki breathed a sigh of relief. Tamahome scowled.
"You stupid shit, why're you a girl!? An' why'd you let her get near you with water!? NEXT TIME YOU'RE KISSIN' MITSUKAKE!!" Tamahome said and the female Tasuki quickly soaked himself in hot water.
"OI! I DIDN'T WANNA DO IT!!! IF I DIDN'T SHE WOULDA SEEN MY FACE! THEN MY FAMILY WOULD KNOW THAT I'M A CHICK!!!" Tasuki yelled angrily. "YOU'RE LUCKY YOU JUST TURN INTA A RAT, BUT WE'RE ALL FREAKS NOW, AN' I DON'T WANT 'EM TO KNOW!!!"
"Then why didn't you shut the door?" Aidou said and looked Tasuki in the eyes. "Brother dearest."
"Oh shit."
Aidou smiled and pinched Tamahome's cheek. "Awww… is this my baby bro's new boyfriend? He's cuuuute."
"OI! WE AIN'T TOGETHER!"
"THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE!"
Aidou smirked. "So… what'll you give me to keep this under wraps?" The boys looked at each other, then looked back at Aidou.
"Anything." They both said and lowered their heads.
"Good."
After some deliberation, they managed to come to an agreement. Tamahome would finance a little shopping trip, and Tasuki… well Tasuki…
"Turn around… face me… face the side… bend over…" Aidou said and tugged at the dress. "I dunno… do you think this'll make me look fat? It makes YOU look fat… but then again, you were always on the chubby side, ne Shun'u-chan?"
Tasuki grumbled. "I hate you."
"Hm… yeah, this'll make my rear look too big. Try on the blue one again, and make sure you pull it all the way down, I wanna see if it'll accentuate my bosom."
"OI! I don't wanna hear about your fuckin' chest!" Tasuki replied angrily and changed quickly. "Are we almost done yet?"
"Of course not sweet, little Shun'u! We've still got to go bra shopping!" She cackled. Tasuki turned bright red. 'If any of the guys saw me like this…' he thought and twirled for his sister.
"I LOVE IT TASUKI-SAN! IT REALLY BRINGS OUT THE COLOR IN YOUR EYES!" Chiriko-chan yelled from across the room and waved at the blushing bandit. He, or rather SHE, ran up and gave Tasuki a big hug.
"Is there one in my size Tasuki-san?"
"Oh fuckin' crap…" Tasuki muttered and looked at Mitsukake, who was hefting a large column of clothes and jewelry. Miaka and Tamahome were snuggling behind them, and Chichiri was trying desperately to keep a straight face.
"You look... quite… lovely… Tasuki-kun no da!" Chichiri managed to sputter before breaking out into fits of laughter. Tasuki growled, and took the bras from Aidou's waiting hands.
After a few hours, and a cup of hot water, Aidou and the travelers went home for a much needed rest.
(TBC, no da.)