Disclaimer: Voyager belongs to
Paramount. Simplicity is a wonderous thing.
Another Take on Dark Matter
By Manda (Mizuno Ami)
Dark matter inside them. She paused in brushing her short, auburn hair
and met her own eyes in the mirror. Janeway examined her image- solemn blue
eyes, circles deep beneath them- feeling as if she could see the dark matter
inside her body, if she stared hard enough at her reflection. Unconciously, she raised a hand to touch her
face, then deliberately lowered it and continued with her preparation for
sleep.
After a moment of donning her nightgown she stood at the mirror
again, leaning closer to wonder over
the dark circles and pale tinge of her cheeks. A sudden movement out of her
peripheral vision drew her attention away, and she pivoted toward the shadows
in a fluid motion of lavender silk.
"Chakotay." Surprise was the first emotion- anger at being caught in such a vulnerable
situation was the second. She easily
attributed the anger to the dark matter coursing through her veins, and pushed
it aside as best she could. There was no other way to be certain- and undue
hostility was the last thing she wanted in a situation such as their own.
"You weren't answering." He looked as surprised as she'd
felt- either at her state of dress or
the supressed fury- she wasn't certain.
One look, however, told her that he too was having trouble getting to
bed, and she allowed herself a moment to look out the viewport…things weren't
getting any better.
"I'm sorry." She was thinking of the nightmare- and the
wormholes. Little mouths which led to the Alpha Quadrant, all of which wanted to eat them alive—or
feed them to the wolves- she wasn't certain she wanted to find out, either way.
A fleet of cloaked warships awaited them, silent vultures hoping that the prey
would arrive already dead. "I was…it
was the dark matter, Chakotay. It's
affecting all of us, you know that."
"Of course I do!" He snapped, and she recoiled from
instinct. Not her own instinct—what was there was merely heightened by
adrenaline. She knew Chakotay was wise, and gentle- not the man whom she was
standing before, watching as he became so hostile and bitter. This wasn't her
Chakotay—it wasn't anyone elses, either.
And as she watched, he became aware, skin around his eyes softening as
he regarded her, posture relaxing. "I'm sorry, Kathryn."
"It's all right," She soothed, reaching to place a hand
on his arm. They stood, close proximity to one another comforting, somehow.
"The Doctor mentioned your headaches—"
"They're getting worse," She murmured, hand venturing to
her temples, fingers massaging in a futile effort. "The headaches, the
nightmares…"
"Nightmares?" His expression became increasingly
concerned as she retreated to the bed, hands folded within her lap, until she
felt the warmth on her cheeks which caused her fingers to stray—hot tears.
Amoment of vulnerablity…and she no longer cared about her helplessness as
Chakotay approached and sat beside her, surprise overtaking the worry as he
lifted his own fingers to wipe away the water.
"Dammit." She murmured, nearly spitting the word as they
sat there, as her headache intensified and anger increased to a slow boil. Her fist slung toward the bedspread in a
silent expression of the fear and frustration, and she raised her eyes as
Chakotay's own warm hand closed about hers before it struck. "What are you doing?"
"Holding you back," He replied, and for a moment she
found herself drawn into his eyes, his relaxed gaze serving a balm to her
wounded emotions. And they sat, until exhaustion became evident, and he lowered
her to the pillow before making his escape.
She slept for an
hour. And the chaos resumed, when she woke.
-Fin
