Title: All The World
Author: kateafur
Email: ksherry@luc.edu
Rating: strong PG-13 for a few swear words
Disclaimer: Me no own. I don't own Casablanca or "I've Got It Bad." I made up Soap Star! magazine, if it's real, then, I didn't do it on purpose.
Summary: "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." -Rick, Casablanca
Pairing: M/M
Spoilers: Up to Departure
Author's Notes: Well, the quote from Casablanca just popped into my head and this story is a result. I know, it's just another of those "Michael and Maria reunite after years apart, blah, blah…" fics, but, hey, give it a chance. It's not very angsty, rather sappy actually, but this is what my muse made me write. Feedback please!!
Six years ago, we broke up.
I don't know what happened. One minute we were close as ever, I chose her over going back to the home I'd been searching for my whole life. I couldn't comprehend even breathing without her. But things change. Our love, that never changed, but the circumstances changed.
See, Max had us on this crazy quest for his son. I backed him up, one hundred percent, how could I not? But, looking back, it all just seems so pointless. We never found his son, never found anything that really mattered. It seemed that all things alien in our life took off when the ship carrying Tess did. The only link remaining to our past was what we had before: strange powers, a couple of stones, the pod chamber, and a book detailing our "destinies" for all the good they'd done us so far.
But we didn't know that then.
We set off one summer, on the pretense of an extended road trip, just the three of us, Max, Isabel, and I. It was hard, very hard, leaving Maria behind. But I knew I was coming back, and I knew she would wait. So, everything looked okay.
The summer months slowly faded into the fall. We stopped home for a time. Senior year rolled by, things seemed to be perfect. Then, just weeks after graduation, Maxwell got a lead.
That's when I realized I had to let her go.
It hurt like hell. But it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. We cried together, made love for the last time, and held each other until dawn.
I told her it wasn't fair. She had these big plans to head off to LA and start her singing career. I couldn't promise her when or if I could be there. She never asked to come with me. I would have never let her.
Liz promised Max she'd wait. And she did.
But someone once told me if you love someone you have to let them go. I couldn't do that to her, make her wait, not when I couldn't promise I'd be back.
Our destinies were different. For the time being at least.
Max and Liz, they were bound right from the start. Maria and I, we never made grandeur declarations like that. We only promised each other the present. The present had run out.
So, that brings me back to where I am now. Sort of. See, Max's major lead turned out to be an eight-month long wild goose chase through the desert. When we hit the final dead end, we packed it up and went home to Roswell.
Home. Roswell.
The two weren't synonymous for me anymore.
Maria was gone. She had moved on. Now living in LA, working on her career, she had a new life. One that didn't include aliens.
I guess I'm not being totally honest here. She hadn't moved on. Not completely. I know that if I had shown up on her doorstep, like usual, begging for forgiveness, maybe I wouldn't be here now. Maybe I'd be wearing the scent of cypress oil and lavender instead of the stench of booze and smoke.
But that's not the case.
I spent the next couple years moving from one desert town to another, picking up odd jobs and being alone. I never strayed too far from Roswell, where life continued on as normal. Max and Liz were attending college together, sharing a cozy apartment. Is worked on building up her life again. I just missed Maria.
On my twenty-first birthday, I'd had enough. Which brings me, finally, to where I am today.
It had been on my mind all those years. What better place to escape to than Vegas? When I was finally legally able to take full advantage of Sin City, I was on the first plane out.
At first I thought maybe it would hold too many memories of her. Specifically, that cozy lounge where she sang and we shared that incredible final night of our little 'spring break.'
I ended up at said restaurant, The Diamond Lounge. True to my thoughts, the place just about killed me. Maria was all over the place. But somehow, I couldn't stay away. The owner, Janet, took pity on me and my rumpled self and offered me a job. I didn't have any real reason to say no.
Three years later, I'm head bartender.
It's a good gig. Great money. Pays the bills and then some. I'd say life is treating me pretty good right now.
But I'd be wrong.
Maria made me watch that black and white chick flick, Casablanca, once. It wasn't so bad. Point is, I hadn't even thought about that movie in years. But right now, on this hot night in Vegas, one line just echoes throughout my head:
"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine."
Because right now, Maria DeLuca, love of my life, the one that got away, is sauntering into The Diamond Lounge.
(End Part 1)
(Part 2)
I think I forgot how to breathe.
She's breathtaking. I haven't seen or talked to her in years. Not since that last amazing, heartbreaking night. I've heard a little about her through Max via Liz but only enough to assure myself she was okay. Nothing more.
I take in her petite body, her curves exactly the way I remember them. She's wearing this killer black dress that hugs and hangs in all the right places. Her hair is shorter than before, but still reaches her shoulders and falls in soft waves around her face. Her emerald eyes look bright in the soft light. And her lips. Oh lord. Those lips that I still fantasize about every night are all red and glossy.
I'm so stunned by her presence that I hardly notice the company she's with.
A man.
He's a pretty boy. Looks vaguely familiar for some reason. Only slightly taller than Maria with her, oh God, stiletto heels. He's built, but, I notice as I eye him up and down, I could take him out easily- without using my powers.
They look pretty happy. He's got this sort of smug smile on his face as he walks slightly behind her, his hand hovering near her back. Bastard. I picture that soft, creamy expanse of skin I used to know so well. Thinking of him contaminating that makes me want to puke.
She's smiling though.
I don't know. Maybe it's because I can perfectly visualize every look she's ever bestowed upon me, be it pissed, amused, turned on, or sad. But the smile she shares with him… it doesn't seem as bright. It's probably just the lighting. Look at her. She's happy. Right? And she deserves it.
"Oh my God, Michael!" A voice screeches at me from the right. I pull my gaze away from Maria and glance over at one of the waitresses, Amber. Amber's nice. Pretty too. We've made out a couple of times….
What? A guy has needs. Besides, that's all it was about. Getting a piece. We're basically just friends. Neither of us is looking for anything serious or even semi-serious. After all, the only object of my affections has just materialized in my bar.
"What's the deal, Amber?" I look back down at the bar, polishing the smooth surface with my rag. It's still early in the evening. Things won't pick up for another hour or so.
Amber smoothes a piece of chocolate brown hair behind her ear. Her eyes are twinkling with excitement. She leans closer to me, as if about to share some huge secret.
She raises a manicured finger towards the table Maria and Pretty Boy just occupied. Maria is facing away from me. Good. Maybe she'll never even see me. Or is that bad? I haven't decided yet.
"See? Look!" She looks like she's about to explode. What the hell is she talking about?
"What?"
She rolls her eyes at me. "Michael! That's Adam Wilkes!"
She waits for me to react. After I think about it for a second, I recognize his face from TV; he's some soap actor or something. I don't see the reason Amber's all excited though. We get lots of quasi-celebrities in here.
Maria is dating a celebrity. A guy thousands, even millions, of women lust over. He has money, class…everything. Oh God.
Amber fixes her makeup in the mirror behind the bar. "He's sitting at my table! Can you believe it? I hope I don't spill wine in his lap or something."
I can feel the jealousy creeping into my veins. Okay, I'll admit, for a brief moment there I had this vision of Maria catching my eye across the smoky dining room and running over to me, begging me to take her back. Now I have a damn bigheaded actor to deal with.
"So, uh, is she his girlfriend?" I try to act nonchalant as I gesture towards Maria again. Never mind the fact my heartbeat has just tripled in pace. I know that if anyone is up on celebrity gossip, it's Amber.
"Well, according to my sources…" She says that as if she had actual sources as opposed to gossip magazines and Entertainment Tonight. "Adam has been seen out and about with some un-named blonde. So, that must be her."
"Hm." I consider this. Well, at least they're not engaged or anything. I think Maxwell would've at least informed me of that. This is really not happening. I haven't seen Maria in six years. This can't be it. My big chance.
"Why? Do ya think she's hot?" Amber leers at me, clearly amused. She always comments on how I'm never interested in other chicks. Always telling me to get a life.
I shrug. Amber laughs and quickly hurries off to get their drink order. I shrink back into the shadow of the bar, deciding what to do.
I've been waiting for six long years to see this woman, the woman I am still so in love with I can't even enjoy looking at another girl without feeling a little guilty. I need a serious plan.
Amber returns, her face lit up like the damn fourth of July. "Adam totally checked me out!" She squeals. Fucking bastard. I send a death glare into his direction. Oh yeah, this scumbag is going down.
"So, what did the blonde order?"
(End Part 2)
(Part 3)
I lean back on the bar, praying to God that this has some effect on her. She could come back here and throw it into my face for all I care, but, please, let her say something.
Amber carries their drinks on a small tray. He ordered a martini; Maria ordered a white wine. In place of the wine, however, I came up with something of my own.
It was a thing I used to do for her. It started one day when we were bored at work. I mixed Maria up an Alien Blast drink as a joke. The drink is basically a Shirley Temple with green coloring. But in my version, I add a little Tabasco sauce to take some of the sweetness out of the drink. I always top it with three cherries especially for Maria. She would take them into her mouth, one by one, and whisper little things like "I love you." Or "Take me now." Depending on the mood.
I watch carefully for a reaction. I made the drink in a wine glass rather than a fountain glass, but I'm sure she'll get it. I even got Amber to say "an Alien Blast for the lady." For thirty bucks, of course.
Since Maria's back is to me, I see Adam Celebrity's reaction first. He looks up at Amber, rather annoyed and confused. After all, who's ever heard of an Alien Blast?
As Amber sets the drink down in front of Maria and makes her declaration, I notice Maria go completely still. After a moment, and a really puzzled look from Adam at her strange reaction, I see Maria question Amber who in turn points in my direction.
The world slows as Maria turns my way and locks into my gaze. I watch her face change from confused, to surprised, to excited, to scared, to basic shock all in one second. Her cherry lips form my name in awe. She slowly gets up from her chair. My pulse goes erratic when she strides intently in my direction.
At this point, I notice Pretty Boy's rather angry reaction to Maria's flight from the table. "Hon! Where are you going?" he commands of her. She doesn't pay any attention.
Amber, too, seems startled by this turn of events. She thought all this was just a joke to get the attention of some girl. Some girl, alright.
My thoughts that the bar would serve as a protective barrier between Maria and her reaction go out the window. I'm not really surprised when Maria charges right behind the bar.
"Michael!" The way she says my name brings a flood of emotions over me. She seems relieved, almost, and happy. Not upset or angry like I thought she might.
"Maria." I end up whispering her name into her hair as she wraps her arms around my waist, her head resting against my chest.
Suddenly, I'm home again.
I can't bring myself to let go. I nuzzle my face into her hair. It smells exactly the same…like wildflowers and oils and Maria. She's pressing her face gently into the crook of my neck and I remember how perfectly we've always fit together.
Why did I ever leave her? Why did I ever have to follow Max on that stupid ghost hunt into the desert?
I place my hand on the smooth skin of her back. I feel her body jump slightly towards mine at the contact. Then I realize what's happening.
Before I can stop it, we've connected. I can feel all the years of loneliness and longing pulsing into her as similar waves wash into me. I see sleepless nights staring at the stars, mindless strumming on her guitar, and the way she jumps every time the doorbell rings, hoping it's me.
Is this for real? Can we both want this, us, again after six years apart?
I slowly ease us apart when I realize we have an audience. Mr. Celebrity has made his way up to the bar and is currently glaring at us, waiting for an explanation. Amber, too, is looking on rather perplexed.
I look deep into Maria's green eyes, amazed at how I can still read them. 'Later,' she conveys to me. She turns towards the bar, ready to face her boyf- whatever. She still stays close to me, though, so I can feel her comforting presence.
"Um. Adam. This is my, uh, friend, Michael Guerin." She flashes Adam a gorgeous grin and grabs my hand, giving it a squeeze. I allow myself to smile, more because of the contact rather than the introduction. At least she didn't say "ex-boyfriend." While accurate, it probably would've killed me.
"Great to meet you, Mikey! Any friend of Maria's is a friend of mine! I'm Adam Wilkes, the boyfriend. " He oozes charm. I want to jack him in the face. He reaches across the bar to shake my hand. We make eye contact and the battle begins.
It's a thing with guys. I know Maria used to hate it when I had to give any guy who even so much as glanced in her direction evil, threatening looks but it's ingrained in our genes to mark our territory. 'Stand down, Alpha Male' she used to always say in this stern voice, teasing me.
But that was back then. This is serious. I give Celebrity my most menacing look, without being completely obvious. He returns the look- a sign he's up for the competition. I swear I can feel Maria roll her eyes with her back to me. We shake hands.
May the best man win.
Adam reaches over the bar and grabs Maria's hand, gently pulling her back towards his side of the bar. "Come on, darling, we'd better eat. We need to put an appearance in at the party before ten." He gives her a sickeningly sweet smile then glances up at me. "You understand."
I just snort. It pains me to watch Maria, the fighter, the independent, be pulled by this prick. Come on, baby. Don't let him take this moment from us. Maria glances at me, torn. A moment later, she makes her choice.
"Adam. Why don't we just eat at the bar? We'll get quicker service. Right, Michael?" She winks at me. There's the woman I know and love.
"Of course." I wink back, giving Adam a look- don't dare argue with her.
"Um. Well, eat at the bar?" He glances around the room, wondering if he'll be recognized. "I don't know…"
Pulling her hand from his and crossing her arms over her chest, Maria glares at him. I can almost sympathize with the poor bastard. Almost. "I'm eating at the bar, Adam. You can do whatever you like." With that she plops down at the bar stool in front of me and gives me an innocent look.
As Adam gives in and sits down next to her, I motion to Amber to bring the drinks over. As she rushes to comply, I pick up an order pad. "What'll it be?"
Adam launches into some spiel about filet mignon-blah-blah cooked blah-blah. Whatever. I write down 'steak- rare' and turn to Maria. She orders the exact meal she did over seven years ago. We smile at each other, remembering how magical that night had been, even if it had gotten off to a rocky start.
"So, Michael, how do you and Maria know each other?"
Maria and I just laugh.
(End Part 3)
(Part 4)
An hour later, things are still running smoothly. Two empty plates- actually make that one empty plate and one plate with a hardly touched bloody steak- sit on the bar before Maria and Adam.
Maria and I are laughing as we remember prom night, junior year in vivid detail. It was the last time we were all together and happy. Maria actually snorts as she details to me about how her and Liz broke into my apartment to go through my stuff.
Adam is none too amused.
I can't believe that after six years apart, we can pick up like this…like nothing's changed. I have to occupy my hands wiping down the bar to keep from brushing that stray piece of silky blonde hair back into place. I haven't laughed this much, even smiled this much, in years.
"Well, I hate to break up this happy reunion but we should really be going, Maria. " Adam makes a big show of checking his watch.
Maria's face falls. Her sad expression pulls at my heart. Does she really miss me that much? Like I miss her? I recall the amazing flashes I experienced earlier.
Only one way to find out.
As Adam is digging for his wallet, I make my escape. I can feel Maria's eyes on me as I practically run over to the piano. I whisper my request into Al's ear. He smiles at me, nodding for me to go ahead. I hop up onto the stage and grab the microphone.
I search Maria's face for a reaction and sure enough, a look of pure excitement washes over her features.
"Ladies and gentlemen, tonight you're in for a rare treat. She's my favorite singer, the voice of an angel. I may be biased, but I'm sure you'll all agree. Returning to this stage after over seven years, is the wonderful, breath-taking…Miss Margarita Salt!" The crowd applauds.
I watch Maria as she gracefully ascends to the stage, her face beaming with the smile I remember. She takes the microphone with confidence, after all she's a seasoned performer now…She turns to me, mouths 'thank you' and turns back to her audience. I see Adam fuming near the door.
The band starts up, playing the familiar opening notes of the song. Closing her eyes, Maria begins to belt out…
The poets say that all who love are blind
But I'm in love and I know what time it is
The Good Book says, "Go seek and ye shall find."
Well, I have sought and my what a climb it is
My life is just like the weather
It changes with the hours
When he's near I'm fair and warmer
When he's gone I'm cloudy with showers
In emotion, like the ocean it's either sink or swim
When a woman loves a man like I love him
Never treats me sweet and gentle the way he should
I got it bad and that ain't good
My poor heart is sentimental, not made of wood
I got it bad and that ain't good
But when the weekend's over and Monday rolls around
I end up like I start out, just cryin' my heart out
He don't love me like I love him, nobody could
I got it bad and that ain't good
Like a lonely weeping willow lost in the wood
I got it bad and that ain't good
And the things I tell my pillow, no woman should
I got it bad and that ain't good
The folks with good intentions tell me to save my tears
I'm glad I'm mad about him, I can't live without him
Lord above me, make him love me the way he should
I got it bad and that ain't good
As she sings the song, I remember all the times we had- good and bad. God, I miss her. I watch the emotion on her face. This was always a favorite song of hers to sing. It was kinda like our song, in a twisted way. She'd sing it to me and then I'd feel bad about ever being an asshole to her. It was never 'good' for her to love me, but she did. And I love her.
The audience is entranced; she's incredible. I warned them. Celebrity, too, looks enthralled. As the notes close on the song and Maria's voice fades out, the crowd erupts into applause. Opening her eyes for the first time, I watch a single tear glide down her soft cheek. She turns to me, smiling, sad, but smiling.
Like before, I walk slowly onto the stage. The crowd still cheers. Al, the piano man, is impressed. He gives me a thumbs up.
The rest happens in slow motion. As I near Maria, she opens her arms to me, tears still streaming. I can't help but feel a little choked up too. Have I mentioned I miss her? I pull her into my arms, not caring about Celebrity watching. I go to place a soft kiss on the top of her head, like I used to do, but as I move in she shifts her head and we end up lip to lip.
Time stops. I feel every nerve in my body, every cell, every particle respond to the contact. It's almost too much. She goes weak in my arms.
Then, suddenly, it's gone. It takes a minute to register; everything goes blank for a second. But Maria's gone. I look up to see Adam pulling her out of the restaurant, ranting and raving. I want to move, run after her, call out. I can't let her get away again.
She keeps looking back at me, panicked, worried, confused, scared. I feel my heart breaking. She disappears out of the door. Out of my life.
(End Part 4)
(EPILOUGE)
Soap Star! Sightings:
Las Vegas- Anybody who's anybody was at the Annual Soap and Sin Bash in Sin City this past week. Soap Star! has the dish on all the juicy 'behind-the-red- carpet' happenings in our exclusive feature article on page 32. However, we have an inside source who detailed a very spicy event further down the strip. Apparently, Adam Wilkes, hunky Dime Paris on Love Harbor, was unable to hold on to his girlfriend, up-and-coming singer, Maria DeLuca, at the swanky hotspot The Diamond Lounge. According to our source, the couple, who've been spotted together for about two months, arrived at the restaurant only to run into an old friend of DeLuca's, bartender Michael Guerin. The couple was then spotted dining at the bar (shock!) with poor Adam looking on as his girlfriend re-ignited her spark with Guerin. Later, Guerin gave a glowing introduction to the crowd as DeLuca took to the stage under the name "Margarita Salt" and gave a stunning rendition of the classic "I've Got It Bad (And That Ain't Good)." Guerin and DeLuca then shared an impromptu kiss après the performance! Look out, Adam! While Wilkes was able to leave with his latest arm candy, rumor has it the two are now splitsville. Hmm…we think Adam Wilkes needs to take a few lessons from his alter ego, the always-charming Paris. We don't think he'd ever let a girl be swept out from under him like that! Better luck next time!
"Oh my God! I can't believe they actually printed your name!" Maria drops the magazine square in my lap as she jumps up from the couch.
"My name? At least I wasn't referred to as 'arm candy'!" I pick up the gossip magazine and chuck it in the general direction of the trashcan. It lands with a loud 'thwap' about a foot short. Ah well. Maria stops at the sound and redirects her route towards the projectile.
"Hey! Don't toss that, paly! They called my performance 'stunning'!" She bends to pick up the magazine, her cute ass well displayed in a pair of cut-off sweatpants. She places the magazine gently on the counter as she enters the kitchen. I can hear her rifling through my cabinets.
I smile. I love watching her be all-domestic in my apartment. It's so natural, like we've picked up right where we left off. I know, I know, we've still gotta lot of shit to work though- it won't be completely easy re-adjusting to our lives together. After all, she lives in LA, I live here in Vegas- and that's just one of the easy problems. But I know we have something real here. We were meant to be together.
I reach for a stray black strappy shoe, obviously Maria's, left hazardously on the floor near the couch. I trace my finger gently along the twists of the leather. She was wearing these shoes that night. I smirk when I remember how that fateful night ended….
My world is falling apart, is all I can think as Maria disappears out the door. I ignore the questioning looks of the lounge patrons as I dejectedly walk back towards the bar. Damn. Damn. She's gone, you dumbass.
A few minutes later, or hours, I'm not sure, but I know I haven't moved from my original spot, I feel two small hands encircle me from behind. My heart starts beating again.
"C'mon, Spaceboy. Do you really think I'd choose some egotistical soap star over my very own alien?"
I lean back into her embrace. "Is it that easy?" I can't help but doubt this. As much as I feel in heaven right now with her coming back to me, choosing me, holding me, I can see the reality of the situation.
She moves to face me. Her hands travel up to cup my face; the familiarity of the gesture soothes me. "Is it that hard?" Her emerald eyes search mine, looking for an answer she already knows deep in her soul.
I think about it. Moving my own hands up to grip her waist, I know this is right.
Always the verbal one, she continues her thought. "Michael, I've missed you. I haven't been whole since you left. It hurt me, a lot, but maybe it was for the best. Now we know. I still love you. Tell me you don't love me."
She looks scared for a minute, like maybe I don't feel the same. I pull her body closer to mine and rest my head against hers. "Of course. Of course, I still love you. You're my everything." My words are whispered, my voice hoarse, out of practice in expressing emotions out loud.
Two tears slip down her cheek as she smiles. "I've waited for this for six years." She leans in to close the distance between us once and for all.
Me too, me too.
"Hello! Earth to Spaceboy!" Maria giggles aloud at that remark. I break out of my reverie to watch her sashay back into the living room, bowl of popcorn and video in hand. God, she's beautiful.
But she forgot something. "Um. Maria. Baby…" I whine the last word, hoping she'll catch on. She gives me a sly look. I raise my eyebrows in question. She glances down at the low cut white tank top she's wearing. Oh. I feel a grin form on my lips as my blood begins racing.
She walks over to me and, leaving the video and popcorn on the coffee table, plops down onto my lap. "Looking for something?" What a little vixen.
I practically growl as I spot the tiny bottle of Tabasco sauce tucked into her bra.
She gives me an evil smirk. I immediately clean the look off her face with a passionate kiss.
A few minutes later, when we finally come up for air, I triumphantly pour Tabasco sauce all over the popcorn.
Maria pouts. "Don't dump that over the whole bowl. You'll ruin it!"
"Whatcha gonna do about it?"
"Is that a challenge?" We stare each other down for a few seconds.
"Um- " My voice cracks a little, damn her, "So, what movie did you rent?"
She shrugs. "A classic. Which means you've probably never seen it."
"Try me."
"Casablanca."
Is she serious? "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." I give Maria a smug look.
She turns pink, the parallel dawning on her. I wait. Yup. Sure enough, a second later she pounces, smacking me with a nearby pillow. "Oh, you think you're so smart, Spaceboy!"
I grab her arm and pin her down onto the couch. "So. You chose me over the Celebrity Prick? It was the flashes, wasn't it? What other guy can send you flying through space with one kiss?" She's squirming under me and I'm holding back a laugh.
She finally gives in and lets out a giggle. "Oh, that was definitely it. The flashes. What about you? Couldn't find another girl who 'sings like an angel'?"
I turn dead serious on her. "Never."
The air turns intense between us. I can feel her heart steadily beating beneath me. Everything else is silent. She finally reaches a hand up and traces my jaw.
"Love you, Michael."
"Love you."
With that, Casablanca and the popcorn and Adam the Bastard are completely forgotten.
THE END
Author: kateafur
Email: ksherry@luc.edu
Rating: strong PG-13 for a few swear words
Disclaimer: Me no own. I don't own Casablanca or "I've Got It Bad." I made up Soap Star! magazine, if it's real, then, I didn't do it on purpose.
Summary: "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." -Rick, Casablanca
Pairing: M/M
Spoilers: Up to Departure
Author's Notes: Well, the quote from Casablanca just popped into my head and this story is a result. I know, it's just another of those "Michael and Maria reunite after years apart, blah, blah…" fics, but, hey, give it a chance. It's not very angsty, rather sappy actually, but this is what my muse made me write. Feedback please!!
Six years ago, we broke up.
I don't know what happened. One minute we were close as ever, I chose her over going back to the home I'd been searching for my whole life. I couldn't comprehend even breathing without her. But things change. Our love, that never changed, but the circumstances changed.
See, Max had us on this crazy quest for his son. I backed him up, one hundred percent, how could I not? But, looking back, it all just seems so pointless. We never found his son, never found anything that really mattered. It seemed that all things alien in our life took off when the ship carrying Tess did. The only link remaining to our past was what we had before: strange powers, a couple of stones, the pod chamber, and a book detailing our "destinies" for all the good they'd done us so far.
But we didn't know that then.
We set off one summer, on the pretense of an extended road trip, just the three of us, Max, Isabel, and I. It was hard, very hard, leaving Maria behind. But I knew I was coming back, and I knew she would wait. So, everything looked okay.
The summer months slowly faded into the fall. We stopped home for a time. Senior year rolled by, things seemed to be perfect. Then, just weeks after graduation, Maxwell got a lead.
That's when I realized I had to let her go.
It hurt like hell. But it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. We cried together, made love for the last time, and held each other until dawn.
I told her it wasn't fair. She had these big plans to head off to LA and start her singing career. I couldn't promise her when or if I could be there. She never asked to come with me. I would have never let her.
Liz promised Max she'd wait. And she did.
But someone once told me if you love someone you have to let them go. I couldn't do that to her, make her wait, not when I couldn't promise I'd be back.
Our destinies were different. For the time being at least.
Max and Liz, they were bound right from the start. Maria and I, we never made grandeur declarations like that. We only promised each other the present. The present had run out.
So, that brings me back to where I am now. Sort of. See, Max's major lead turned out to be an eight-month long wild goose chase through the desert. When we hit the final dead end, we packed it up and went home to Roswell.
Home. Roswell.
The two weren't synonymous for me anymore.
Maria was gone. She had moved on. Now living in LA, working on her career, she had a new life. One that didn't include aliens.
I guess I'm not being totally honest here. She hadn't moved on. Not completely. I know that if I had shown up on her doorstep, like usual, begging for forgiveness, maybe I wouldn't be here now. Maybe I'd be wearing the scent of cypress oil and lavender instead of the stench of booze and smoke.
But that's not the case.
I spent the next couple years moving from one desert town to another, picking up odd jobs and being alone. I never strayed too far from Roswell, where life continued on as normal. Max and Liz were attending college together, sharing a cozy apartment. Is worked on building up her life again. I just missed Maria.
On my twenty-first birthday, I'd had enough. Which brings me, finally, to where I am today.
It had been on my mind all those years. What better place to escape to than Vegas? When I was finally legally able to take full advantage of Sin City, I was on the first plane out.
At first I thought maybe it would hold too many memories of her. Specifically, that cozy lounge where she sang and we shared that incredible final night of our little 'spring break.'
I ended up at said restaurant, The Diamond Lounge. True to my thoughts, the place just about killed me. Maria was all over the place. But somehow, I couldn't stay away. The owner, Janet, took pity on me and my rumpled self and offered me a job. I didn't have any real reason to say no.
Three years later, I'm head bartender.
It's a good gig. Great money. Pays the bills and then some. I'd say life is treating me pretty good right now.
But I'd be wrong.
Maria made me watch that black and white chick flick, Casablanca, once. It wasn't so bad. Point is, I hadn't even thought about that movie in years. But right now, on this hot night in Vegas, one line just echoes throughout my head:
"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine."
Because right now, Maria DeLuca, love of my life, the one that got away, is sauntering into The Diamond Lounge.
(End Part 1)
(Part 2)
I think I forgot how to breathe.
She's breathtaking. I haven't seen or talked to her in years. Not since that last amazing, heartbreaking night. I've heard a little about her through Max via Liz but only enough to assure myself she was okay. Nothing more.
I take in her petite body, her curves exactly the way I remember them. She's wearing this killer black dress that hugs and hangs in all the right places. Her hair is shorter than before, but still reaches her shoulders and falls in soft waves around her face. Her emerald eyes look bright in the soft light. And her lips. Oh lord. Those lips that I still fantasize about every night are all red and glossy.
I'm so stunned by her presence that I hardly notice the company she's with.
A man.
He's a pretty boy. Looks vaguely familiar for some reason. Only slightly taller than Maria with her, oh God, stiletto heels. He's built, but, I notice as I eye him up and down, I could take him out easily- without using my powers.
They look pretty happy. He's got this sort of smug smile on his face as he walks slightly behind her, his hand hovering near her back. Bastard. I picture that soft, creamy expanse of skin I used to know so well. Thinking of him contaminating that makes me want to puke.
She's smiling though.
I don't know. Maybe it's because I can perfectly visualize every look she's ever bestowed upon me, be it pissed, amused, turned on, or sad. But the smile she shares with him… it doesn't seem as bright. It's probably just the lighting. Look at her. She's happy. Right? And she deserves it.
"Oh my God, Michael!" A voice screeches at me from the right. I pull my gaze away from Maria and glance over at one of the waitresses, Amber. Amber's nice. Pretty too. We've made out a couple of times….
What? A guy has needs. Besides, that's all it was about. Getting a piece. We're basically just friends. Neither of us is looking for anything serious or even semi-serious. After all, the only object of my affections has just materialized in my bar.
"What's the deal, Amber?" I look back down at the bar, polishing the smooth surface with my rag. It's still early in the evening. Things won't pick up for another hour or so.
Amber smoothes a piece of chocolate brown hair behind her ear. Her eyes are twinkling with excitement. She leans closer to me, as if about to share some huge secret.
She raises a manicured finger towards the table Maria and Pretty Boy just occupied. Maria is facing away from me. Good. Maybe she'll never even see me. Or is that bad? I haven't decided yet.
"See? Look!" She looks like she's about to explode. What the hell is she talking about?
"What?"
She rolls her eyes at me. "Michael! That's Adam Wilkes!"
She waits for me to react. After I think about it for a second, I recognize his face from TV; he's some soap actor or something. I don't see the reason Amber's all excited though. We get lots of quasi-celebrities in here.
Maria is dating a celebrity. A guy thousands, even millions, of women lust over. He has money, class…everything. Oh God.
Amber fixes her makeup in the mirror behind the bar. "He's sitting at my table! Can you believe it? I hope I don't spill wine in his lap or something."
I can feel the jealousy creeping into my veins. Okay, I'll admit, for a brief moment there I had this vision of Maria catching my eye across the smoky dining room and running over to me, begging me to take her back. Now I have a damn bigheaded actor to deal with.
"So, uh, is she his girlfriend?" I try to act nonchalant as I gesture towards Maria again. Never mind the fact my heartbeat has just tripled in pace. I know that if anyone is up on celebrity gossip, it's Amber.
"Well, according to my sources…" She says that as if she had actual sources as opposed to gossip magazines and Entertainment Tonight. "Adam has been seen out and about with some un-named blonde. So, that must be her."
"Hm." I consider this. Well, at least they're not engaged or anything. I think Maxwell would've at least informed me of that. This is really not happening. I haven't seen Maria in six years. This can't be it. My big chance.
"Why? Do ya think she's hot?" Amber leers at me, clearly amused. She always comments on how I'm never interested in other chicks. Always telling me to get a life.
I shrug. Amber laughs and quickly hurries off to get their drink order. I shrink back into the shadow of the bar, deciding what to do.
I've been waiting for six long years to see this woman, the woman I am still so in love with I can't even enjoy looking at another girl without feeling a little guilty. I need a serious plan.
Amber returns, her face lit up like the damn fourth of July. "Adam totally checked me out!" She squeals. Fucking bastard. I send a death glare into his direction. Oh yeah, this scumbag is going down.
"So, what did the blonde order?"
(End Part 2)
(Part 3)
I lean back on the bar, praying to God that this has some effect on her. She could come back here and throw it into my face for all I care, but, please, let her say something.
Amber carries their drinks on a small tray. He ordered a martini; Maria ordered a white wine. In place of the wine, however, I came up with something of my own.
It was a thing I used to do for her. It started one day when we were bored at work. I mixed Maria up an Alien Blast drink as a joke. The drink is basically a Shirley Temple with green coloring. But in my version, I add a little Tabasco sauce to take some of the sweetness out of the drink. I always top it with three cherries especially for Maria. She would take them into her mouth, one by one, and whisper little things like "I love you." Or "Take me now." Depending on the mood.
I watch carefully for a reaction. I made the drink in a wine glass rather than a fountain glass, but I'm sure she'll get it. I even got Amber to say "an Alien Blast for the lady." For thirty bucks, of course.
Since Maria's back is to me, I see Adam Celebrity's reaction first. He looks up at Amber, rather annoyed and confused. After all, who's ever heard of an Alien Blast?
As Amber sets the drink down in front of Maria and makes her declaration, I notice Maria go completely still. After a moment, and a really puzzled look from Adam at her strange reaction, I see Maria question Amber who in turn points in my direction.
The world slows as Maria turns my way and locks into my gaze. I watch her face change from confused, to surprised, to excited, to scared, to basic shock all in one second. Her cherry lips form my name in awe. She slowly gets up from her chair. My pulse goes erratic when she strides intently in my direction.
At this point, I notice Pretty Boy's rather angry reaction to Maria's flight from the table. "Hon! Where are you going?" he commands of her. She doesn't pay any attention.
Amber, too, seems startled by this turn of events. She thought all this was just a joke to get the attention of some girl. Some girl, alright.
My thoughts that the bar would serve as a protective barrier between Maria and her reaction go out the window. I'm not really surprised when Maria charges right behind the bar.
"Michael!" The way she says my name brings a flood of emotions over me. She seems relieved, almost, and happy. Not upset or angry like I thought she might.
"Maria." I end up whispering her name into her hair as she wraps her arms around my waist, her head resting against my chest.
Suddenly, I'm home again.
I can't bring myself to let go. I nuzzle my face into her hair. It smells exactly the same…like wildflowers and oils and Maria. She's pressing her face gently into the crook of my neck and I remember how perfectly we've always fit together.
Why did I ever leave her? Why did I ever have to follow Max on that stupid ghost hunt into the desert?
I place my hand on the smooth skin of her back. I feel her body jump slightly towards mine at the contact. Then I realize what's happening.
Before I can stop it, we've connected. I can feel all the years of loneliness and longing pulsing into her as similar waves wash into me. I see sleepless nights staring at the stars, mindless strumming on her guitar, and the way she jumps every time the doorbell rings, hoping it's me.
Is this for real? Can we both want this, us, again after six years apart?
I slowly ease us apart when I realize we have an audience. Mr. Celebrity has made his way up to the bar and is currently glaring at us, waiting for an explanation. Amber, too, is looking on rather perplexed.
I look deep into Maria's green eyes, amazed at how I can still read them. 'Later,' she conveys to me. She turns towards the bar, ready to face her boyf- whatever. She still stays close to me, though, so I can feel her comforting presence.
"Um. Adam. This is my, uh, friend, Michael Guerin." She flashes Adam a gorgeous grin and grabs my hand, giving it a squeeze. I allow myself to smile, more because of the contact rather than the introduction. At least she didn't say "ex-boyfriend." While accurate, it probably would've killed me.
"Great to meet you, Mikey! Any friend of Maria's is a friend of mine! I'm Adam Wilkes, the boyfriend. " He oozes charm. I want to jack him in the face. He reaches across the bar to shake my hand. We make eye contact and the battle begins.
It's a thing with guys. I know Maria used to hate it when I had to give any guy who even so much as glanced in her direction evil, threatening looks but it's ingrained in our genes to mark our territory. 'Stand down, Alpha Male' she used to always say in this stern voice, teasing me.
But that was back then. This is serious. I give Celebrity my most menacing look, without being completely obvious. He returns the look- a sign he's up for the competition. I swear I can feel Maria roll her eyes with her back to me. We shake hands.
May the best man win.
Adam reaches over the bar and grabs Maria's hand, gently pulling her back towards his side of the bar. "Come on, darling, we'd better eat. We need to put an appearance in at the party before ten." He gives her a sickeningly sweet smile then glances up at me. "You understand."
I just snort. It pains me to watch Maria, the fighter, the independent, be pulled by this prick. Come on, baby. Don't let him take this moment from us. Maria glances at me, torn. A moment later, she makes her choice.
"Adam. Why don't we just eat at the bar? We'll get quicker service. Right, Michael?" She winks at me. There's the woman I know and love.
"Of course." I wink back, giving Adam a look- don't dare argue with her.
"Um. Well, eat at the bar?" He glances around the room, wondering if he'll be recognized. "I don't know…"
Pulling her hand from his and crossing her arms over her chest, Maria glares at him. I can almost sympathize with the poor bastard. Almost. "I'm eating at the bar, Adam. You can do whatever you like." With that she plops down at the bar stool in front of me and gives me an innocent look.
As Adam gives in and sits down next to her, I motion to Amber to bring the drinks over. As she rushes to comply, I pick up an order pad. "What'll it be?"
Adam launches into some spiel about filet mignon-blah-blah cooked blah-blah. Whatever. I write down 'steak- rare' and turn to Maria. She orders the exact meal she did over seven years ago. We smile at each other, remembering how magical that night had been, even if it had gotten off to a rocky start.
"So, Michael, how do you and Maria know each other?"
Maria and I just laugh.
(End Part 3)
(Part 4)
An hour later, things are still running smoothly. Two empty plates- actually make that one empty plate and one plate with a hardly touched bloody steak- sit on the bar before Maria and Adam.
Maria and I are laughing as we remember prom night, junior year in vivid detail. It was the last time we were all together and happy. Maria actually snorts as she details to me about how her and Liz broke into my apartment to go through my stuff.
Adam is none too amused.
I can't believe that after six years apart, we can pick up like this…like nothing's changed. I have to occupy my hands wiping down the bar to keep from brushing that stray piece of silky blonde hair back into place. I haven't laughed this much, even smiled this much, in years.
"Well, I hate to break up this happy reunion but we should really be going, Maria. " Adam makes a big show of checking his watch.
Maria's face falls. Her sad expression pulls at my heart. Does she really miss me that much? Like I miss her? I recall the amazing flashes I experienced earlier.
Only one way to find out.
As Adam is digging for his wallet, I make my escape. I can feel Maria's eyes on me as I practically run over to the piano. I whisper my request into Al's ear. He smiles at me, nodding for me to go ahead. I hop up onto the stage and grab the microphone.
I search Maria's face for a reaction and sure enough, a look of pure excitement washes over her features.
"Ladies and gentlemen, tonight you're in for a rare treat. She's my favorite singer, the voice of an angel. I may be biased, but I'm sure you'll all agree. Returning to this stage after over seven years, is the wonderful, breath-taking…Miss Margarita Salt!" The crowd applauds.
I watch Maria as she gracefully ascends to the stage, her face beaming with the smile I remember. She takes the microphone with confidence, after all she's a seasoned performer now…She turns to me, mouths 'thank you' and turns back to her audience. I see Adam fuming near the door.
The band starts up, playing the familiar opening notes of the song. Closing her eyes, Maria begins to belt out…
The poets say that all who love are blind
But I'm in love and I know what time it is
The Good Book says, "Go seek and ye shall find."
Well, I have sought and my what a climb it is
My life is just like the weather
It changes with the hours
When he's near I'm fair and warmer
When he's gone I'm cloudy with showers
In emotion, like the ocean it's either sink or swim
When a woman loves a man like I love him
Never treats me sweet and gentle the way he should
I got it bad and that ain't good
My poor heart is sentimental, not made of wood
I got it bad and that ain't good
But when the weekend's over and Monday rolls around
I end up like I start out, just cryin' my heart out
He don't love me like I love him, nobody could
I got it bad and that ain't good
Like a lonely weeping willow lost in the wood
I got it bad and that ain't good
And the things I tell my pillow, no woman should
I got it bad and that ain't good
The folks with good intentions tell me to save my tears
I'm glad I'm mad about him, I can't live without him
Lord above me, make him love me the way he should
I got it bad and that ain't good
As she sings the song, I remember all the times we had- good and bad. God, I miss her. I watch the emotion on her face. This was always a favorite song of hers to sing. It was kinda like our song, in a twisted way. She'd sing it to me and then I'd feel bad about ever being an asshole to her. It was never 'good' for her to love me, but she did. And I love her.
The audience is entranced; she's incredible. I warned them. Celebrity, too, looks enthralled. As the notes close on the song and Maria's voice fades out, the crowd erupts into applause. Opening her eyes for the first time, I watch a single tear glide down her soft cheek. She turns to me, smiling, sad, but smiling.
Like before, I walk slowly onto the stage. The crowd still cheers. Al, the piano man, is impressed. He gives me a thumbs up.
The rest happens in slow motion. As I near Maria, she opens her arms to me, tears still streaming. I can't help but feel a little choked up too. Have I mentioned I miss her? I pull her into my arms, not caring about Celebrity watching. I go to place a soft kiss on the top of her head, like I used to do, but as I move in she shifts her head and we end up lip to lip.
Time stops. I feel every nerve in my body, every cell, every particle respond to the contact. It's almost too much. She goes weak in my arms.
Then, suddenly, it's gone. It takes a minute to register; everything goes blank for a second. But Maria's gone. I look up to see Adam pulling her out of the restaurant, ranting and raving. I want to move, run after her, call out. I can't let her get away again.
She keeps looking back at me, panicked, worried, confused, scared. I feel my heart breaking. She disappears out of the door. Out of my life.
(End Part 4)
(EPILOUGE)
Soap Star! Sightings:
Las Vegas- Anybody who's anybody was at the Annual Soap and Sin Bash in Sin City this past week. Soap Star! has the dish on all the juicy 'behind-the-red- carpet' happenings in our exclusive feature article on page 32. However, we have an inside source who detailed a very spicy event further down the strip. Apparently, Adam Wilkes, hunky Dime Paris on Love Harbor, was unable to hold on to his girlfriend, up-and-coming singer, Maria DeLuca, at the swanky hotspot The Diamond Lounge. According to our source, the couple, who've been spotted together for about two months, arrived at the restaurant only to run into an old friend of DeLuca's, bartender Michael Guerin. The couple was then spotted dining at the bar (shock!) with poor Adam looking on as his girlfriend re-ignited her spark with Guerin. Later, Guerin gave a glowing introduction to the crowd as DeLuca took to the stage under the name "Margarita Salt" and gave a stunning rendition of the classic "I've Got It Bad (And That Ain't Good)." Guerin and DeLuca then shared an impromptu kiss après the performance! Look out, Adam! While Wilkes was able to leave with his latest arm candy, rumor has it the two are now splitsville. Hmm…we think Adam Wilkes needs to take a few lessons from his alter ego, the always-charming Paris. We don't think he'd ever let a girl be swept out from under him like that! Better luck next time!
"Oh my God! I can't believe they actually printed your name!" Maria drops the magazine square in my lap as she jumps up from the couch.
"My name? At least I wasn't referred to as 'arm candy'!" I pick up the gossip magazine and chuck it in the general direction of the trashcan. It lands with a loud 'thwap' about a foot short. Ah well. Maria stops at the sound and redirects her route towards the projectile.
"Hey! Don't toss that, paly! They called my performance 'stunning'!" She bends to pick up the magazine, her cute ass well displayed in a pair of cut-off sweatpants. She places the magazine gently on the counter as she enters the kitchen. I can hear her rifling through my cabinets.
I smile. I love watching her be all-domestic in my apartment. It's so natural, like we've picked up right where we left off. I know, I know, we've still gotta lot of shit to work though- it won't be completely easy re-adjusting to our lives together. After all, she lives in LA, I live here in Vegas- and that's just one of the easy problems. But I know we have something real here. We were meant to be together.
I reach for a stray black strappy shoe, obviously Maria's, left hazardously on the floor near the couch. I trace my finger gently along the twists of the leather. She was wearing these shoes that night. I smirk when I remember how that fateful night ended….
My world is falling apart, is all I can think as Maria disappears out the door. I ignore the questioning looks of the lounge patrons as I dejectedly walk back towards the bar. Damn. Damn. She's gone, you dumbass.
A few minutes later, or hours, I'm not sure, but I know I haven't moved from my original spot, I feel two small hands encircle me from behind. My heart starts beating again.
"C'mon, Spaceboy. Do you really think I'd choose some egotistical soap star over my very own alien?"
I lean back into her embrace. "Is it that easy?" I can't help but doubt this. As much as I feel in heaven right now with her coming back to me, choosing me, holding me, I can see the reality of the situation.
She moves to face me. Her hands travel up to cup my face; the familiarity of the gesture soothes me. "Is it that hard?" Her emerald eyes search mine, looking for an answer she already knows deep in her soul.
I think about it. Moving my own hands up to grip her waist, I know this is right.
Always the verbal one, she continues her thought. "Michael, I've missed you. I haven't been whole since you left. It hurt me, a lot, but maybe it was for the best. Now we know. I still love you. Tell me you don't love me."
She looks scared for a minute, like maybe I don't feel the same. I pull her body closer to mine and rest my head against hers. "Of course. Of course, I still love you. You're my everything." My words are whispered, my voice hoarse, out of practice in expressing emotions out loud.
Two tears slip down her cheek as she smiles. "I've waited for this for six years." She leans in to close the distance between us once and for all.
Me too, me too.
"Hello! Earth to Spaceboy!" Maria giggles aloud at that remark. I break out of my reverie to watch her sashay back into the living room, bowl of popcorn and video in hand. God, she's beautiful.
But she forgot something. "Um. Maria. Baby…" I whine the last word, hoping she'll catch on. She gives me a sly look. I raise my eyebrows in question. She glances down at the low cut white tank top she's wearing. Oh. I feel a grin form on my lips as my blood begins racing.
She walks over to me and, leaving the video and popcorn on the coffee table, plops down onto my lap. "Looking for something?" What a little vixen.
I practically growl as I spot the tiny bottle of Tabasco sauce tucked into her bra.
She gives me an evil smirk. I immediately clean the look off her face with a passionate kiss.
A few minutes later, when we finally come up for air, I triumphantly pour Tabasco sauce all over the popcorn.
Maria pouts. "Don't dump that over the whole bowl. You'll ruin it!"
"Whatcha gonna do about it?"
"Is that a challenge?" We stare each other down for a few seconds.
"Um- " My voice cracks a little, damn her, "So, what movie did you rent?"
She shrugs. "A classic. Which means you've probably never seen it."
"Try me."
"Casablanca."
Is she serious? "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." I give Maria a smug look.
She turns pink, the parallel dawning on her. I wait. Yup. Sure enough, a second later she pounces, smacking me with a nearby pillow. "Oh, you think you're so smart, Spaceboy!"
I grab her arm and pin her down onto the couch. "So. You chose me over the Celebrity Prick? It was the flashes, wasn't it? What other guy can send you flying through space with one kiss?" She's squirming under me and I'm holding back a laugh.
She finally gives in and lets out a giggle. "Oh, that was definitely it. The flashes. What about you? Couldn't find another girl who 'sings like an angel'?"
I turn dead serious on her. "Never."
The air turns intense between us. I can feel her heart steadily beating beneath me. Everything else is silent. She finally reaches a hand up and traces my jaw.
"Love you, Michael."
"Love you."
With that, Casablanca and the popcorn and Adam the Bastard are completely forgotten.
THE END