by Donna
Disclaimer-Paramount owns all. I just do this for my own pleasure.
Dedication: To Lady Chakotay. If not for the your article about why people write fanfic, I never would have had the nerve to do this.
This is my version of what happens after Endgame. I know that a lot
of authors have tried to rewrite Endgame, but I really enjoyed the episode,
with two exceptions. I felt that it ended to abruptly, and of course, the
ridiculous pairing of Chakotay and Seven. Rather than change what had already
happened, I simply chose to tell the story of what happens after the end
of the episode. I hope you enjoy it.
End Of The Game
The Federation Starship Voyager sped on its way toward the blue jewel that hung in space before them. The blue jewel that was Earth. Captain Kathryn Janeway sat in her command chair sadly watching the viewscreen. Despite the fact that this was the culmination of seven years of hard work, her thoughts were anything but joyful.
After all these years, we finally make it home. Why do I feel so… empty?
Rising suddenly, she spoke to Commander Chakotay at the helm.
"Commander, I'll be in my Ready Room, working on my report for the Admiralty. Maintain course for Earth. You have the bridge."
"Aye, aye, Captain," came his quick reply.
The doors to her Ready Room swished closed behind her, as Janeway walked to her replicator.
"Coffee, black," she ordered. The requested drink appeared before her, she picked it up and took a deep breath, savoring the pungent aroma. "Well, at least I don't have to worry about where my next cup of this is coming from anymore."
Walking to her desk, she sat down and picked up a padd to begin her report but found herself unable to concentrate. Get a grip, Kathryn, she thought, as she began to rub her temples. You're just tired.That's all…just tired.
"Ha!" she snorted, "as if I believe that…."
You know what the problem really is… you just haven't got the guts to face it….
A hail from the Bridge conveniently allowed her to discontinue her uncomfortable line of thought.
"Bridge to Captain Janeway." Ensign Harry Kim's voice was so full of excitement that she had to smile.
"Janeway here," she replied, touching her commbadge.
"Captain, there's an incoming transmission from Starfleet Command."
"All right," she replied "route it here to my Ready Room."
"Aye, Captain." She could hear the disappointment in his voice, even over the commlink. With a sigh, she realized just how much he was hoping to hear from his parents.
The face of Admiral Paris appeared on the screen.
"Hello, again, Kathryn." The use of her first name surprised her.
"I assume this isn't an official call, Owen?"
"No, I just wanted to welcome you home and hopefully talk to my son."
"Well, I'm afraid that he's not available at the moment, it seems he's in sickbay meeting his new daughter."
"His daughter? When…how…?"
"Well, the when was about 20 minutes ago." She said laughing. "And the how… well, I think it's safe to say the usual methods were employed. The latest word from the Doctor is that mother and child are both doing fine. I can patch you through to sickbay if you would like to talk to them."
"Thank you, Kathryn, I would appreciate that."
After contacting sickbay and letting Tom know his father wanted to speak to him she once again began working on her report.
Two hours later her commbadge beeped.
"Bridge to Captain Janeway."
Kathryn jumped when she heard Chakotay's voice. Trying not to sound like she was uncomfortable talking to him, she replied quickly. "Janeway here, Commander."
"Captain, we're approaching Earth orbit." her First Officer informed her.
Sighing, she answered, "On my way, Commander." Well, it's show time, Kathryn. Let's get this over with.
Reluctantly, she rose from her chair and strode through the door, onto the bridge. As she made her way to her command chair the turbolift opened and out walked Lt. Tom Paris.
"Lt. Paris, you're supposed to be in sickbay with your family." Janeway's voice was tinged with surprise.
"Captain, you don't honestly believe that I would miss this for anything, do you?" he laughed, "Besides,
B'Elanna was terrified at the idea of Chakotay doing the driving."
"Very well, Mr. Paris, you have the conn," replied the Captain, trying not to laugh at the indignant look on the Commander's face as he crossed to take his seat next to her.
"Mr. Kim, open a shipwide channel please." the Captain asked the Communications Officer.
"Open, Captain."
"To all hands, in a few minutes we will be landing at the Presidio. To all of you who call Earth home, let me be the first to say, 'welcome home'. For those of you who will be continuing on to your own home worlds, let me wish you safe journey and assure you that transportation will be arranged for you as quickly as possible. I expect that the debriefing process for most of you will be short and you will be united with friends and family quickly." Kathryn paused for a moment before continuing, "I want you all to know that it has been both a pleasure and an honor to serve with each one of you. Despite the unorthodox means of our coming together, this crew has proven itself capable, time and again, of overcoming our differences and working together. During our years in the Delta Quadrant we made some new friends and faced a seemingly unending supply of enemies. Just surviving, from day to day, became a monumental task. Through it all, we became more than just the crew of a starship, lost years away from home. We became a family. I wish you all good luck in your future endeavors, and thank you, for being the very best crew any captain could ever hope to have. Now... let's go home. Janeway, out."
After glancing quickly around the bridge she said, "Lt. Paris, begin landing procedures, at your discretion."
"Aye, Captain." Paris answered quickly, trying to mask his nervousness. He realized that millions of people would probably see this landing, transmitted over and over on the news services. He had every intention of making it perfect.
He tapped his commbadge, "Paris to engineering, take the warp core off-line, vent all plasma from the nacelles and stand by to engage atmospheric thrusters." His fingers began to fly over the helm controls.
"Captain, I've plotted a descent course, where would you like to land?"
A small sad smile crept onto Janeway's lips, "Well, the Admiral told me you could see the Golden Gate Bridge from the Ready Room viewport. That sounds like the front lawn of Starfleet Headquarters to me, Mr. Paris."
"Yes, Ma'am!" Tom began calling out status reports as he continued the preparations to land. "Atmospheric controls at stand-by, landing mechanisms on-line, inertial dampeners at maximum." The ship began its descent into the atmosphere as clouds began to fill the main viewscreen. "We're on the glide trajectory. Altitude…100 kilometers. Speed…10,000 k.p.h." Voyager began to shake slightly, "20 kilometers to the landing site, we should be able to see something soon." As if on cue, the clouds dissipated away and the Pacific Ocean came into view. As Voyager sped above the ocean surface, the outline of a city became visible in the distance. As they neared, more and more of San Francisco began to take shape, to include, finally, the Golden Gate Bridge. Taking a deep breath, Tom made a decision. Altering Voyager's course slightly, he headed for the bridge. At the very last moment, the ship swooped down and sailed gracefully between the upright struts of the bridge.
With Starfleet in view, Tom began his final preparations. "Extending landing struts, preparing to release inertial dampeners." A few moments later, "landing struts down and locked."
Finally, a small bump as Voyager eased onto the land, "Disengaging engines, securing thruster exhaust."
He sighed, turned to the Captain and said, "We're down."
"Good work, Tom." Captain Janeway stood as she spoke to the jubilant helmsman. Chakotay stood also, to take his usual place beside her. She glanced quickly at him, slightly surprised, but silently thanking him with her eyes.
Looking forward again she spoke, "Ensign Kim, hail Starfleet Command."
"They're replying, Captain," Harry replied just seconds later.
"Put it on screen, Ensign."
Moments later the face of Admiral Paris appeared before them. Straightening slightly, Janeway spoke.
"Admiral Paris, Voyager has landed."
- * * * * *
They were meeting in the Briefing Room. Admirals' Paris and Necheyev had come aboard soon after Voyager had landed. Captain Janeway was the only other person present. The requested absence of the rest of the senior staff had made her apprehensive and as she listened, that changed to anger and outrage.
"What do you mean? I've never been sequestered during a debriefing before. Why are we being treated as if we're under arrest? This crew has been through hell for the last seven years, they should be treated like heroes, not criminals."
"Captain Janeway," Admiral Necheyev stressed her rank, "Starfleet Command is well aware of the accomplishments of you and your crew. You must understand that this is a totally unprecedented situation. No other ship has ever been to the Delta Quadrant and back and standard procedures will not suffice. You have among your crew several… shall we say… unknown quantities." Janeway's use of her infamous 'death glare' seemed to be having no effect on the Admiral. "A former Borg drone, several members of the Equinox crew, an inmate of the New Zealand Penal Colony and, of course, the Maquis members, that you were sent to arrest, but instead chose to integrate into your crew in several command positions." As the Admiral continued, Kathryn's anger quickly changed to the cold chill of fear. "These personnel, as well as yourself, will remain, in quarters, at Starfleet Headquarters, until such time as a decision is made as to your final disposition, with criminal charges being a possibility."
Admiral Paris rose and made his way to her side, "I'm truly sorry, Kathryn. I argued against this, but Starfleet Security won out. I'm afraid that right now, certain members of your crew are considered potential threats."
"To include your son and daughter-in-law?!" she snapped back at him. "This is ridiculous, every member of this crew risked his or her life on a daily basis to get Voyager home. For the past seven years they have worked together, as a 'Starfleet' crew, upholding and defending, sometimes with their lives, all the principles that Starfleet and the Federation hold dear. And now you want me to tell them that instead of being welcomed home as the heroes that they are, Starfleet considers them a threat to those very principles and is considering whether or not to throw them all in jail."
"Captain!" All heads in the room turned to face Necheyev. "How much you choose to tell your crew is immaterial to me. However, their cooperation will of course make this entire situation go much more smoothly..."
"...I assure you, Admiral," Janeway ignored the scowl that Necheyev sent her way, "my crew will, in all instances, conduct themselves as any Starfleet crew and assist you in every way they can. Even when they are being persecuted."
"See that they do, Captain." The Admiral rose to leave, turning just before reaching the door. "The members of your crew that began this mission with you, will be transported to Starfleet Headquarters, debriefed and released to their families beginning at 1500 hours, today. The rest of your crew and yourself will be escorted, by a security guard, at 0800 tomorrow morning. Please advise them not to leave the ship or communicate with anyone not on board. Good night, Captain and…'welcome home'."
- * * * * *
"… so you now know as much as I know. Admiral Necheyev made it clear that she, at least, believes that many of the crew should be considered criminals… to include me." Janeway sighed as she finished the briefing she had just given. She had informed them what was to happen and now she waited for their reactions. She didn't wait long.
Ensign Kim was the first to speak up. "Captain, I can't believe that Starfleet is doing this. It doesn't make sense. Commander Chakotay and the other Maquis aren't dangerous. Their just as much a part of this crew as I am. So are the Equinox crew. Why are they doing this?" The panic evident in his voice worried Janeway.
"Harry, its going to be all right." Chakotay tried to calm the agitated Ensign. " I was half expecting this to happen when we got back. After all, we are the reason that Voyager was in the Badlands. From Starfleets' point of view, if not for us none of this would have happened."
B'Elanna broke in, anger evident in her voice. "But we have been on Voyager for the past seven years, lost, just like the rest of the crew and we've done just as much, and lost just as many people, as they have. If we deserve to be punished for what we did in the Alpha Quadrant, then seven years in the Delta Quadrant should, at least, be considered 'time served'. And what about Tom… are they going to send him back to New Zealand? Surely his sentence has been served by now. Captain, we've worked together all this time, doesn't Starfleet count that for anything?"
Knowing that an angry Klingon was not what was needed right now, Janeway rose and moved to stand behind B'Elanna, placing her hands on her shoulders. "I understand everyone's concerns. I really don't know why this is happening any more than you do. Perhaps Starfleet is just being cautious, do to the recent war. But what ever happens I promise you this…not one member of this crew will go to prison… not former Maquis, Equinox or Borg. Is that understood?"
Each person nodded their understanding as Janeway moved around the room and continued. " I want the crew to be told only that they are to cooperate with Starfleet completely. Answer any and all questions truthfully, even if they think it will reflect badly on my command. I assure you that I can, and will, stand up for myself. My only concern is for the crew."
"Harry, you and Commander Tuvok were assigned to our original mission, so I don't expect you to be held as long as we are, but since you are part of the senior staff it may be longer than the rest of the crew. I want you to assure them all that they will be with their families soon." Janeway spoke softly to the distressed Ensign.
"Yes, ma'am." He replied quickly, much calmer.
"Commander Chakotay," she avoided looking directly at him as she spoke, "let the other former Maquis and the Equinox crew know when to be ready. Tell them not to worry, just to cooperate fully."
"Doctor, download your program into your mobile emitter and be prepared to disembark with us in the morning. Admiral Necheyev didn't mention you, but you are a member of this crew and as such I will insist that Starfleet treat you as one."
"Thank you, Captain." The doctor replied.
"Well, I think that about covers everything. Dismissed."
As the group began to exit, Janeway spoke softly,
"Commander Tuvok, if you would please stay a moment."
"Of course Captain." He turned to face her as the doors swished closed after the rest of the staff left the room. "Is there something you need my assistance with?"
"No, Tuvok. I just wanted to tell you that I have spoken with Admiral Paris. I'm sorry, but I had to let him know about your condition in order for him to allow your family to see you. A message has already been sent to T'pel and they should be here soon. I'm sure that you also realize that Starfleet is going to want a through debriefing from you in reference to your time spent with the Maquis aboard Chakotay's ship."
"I am aware that the information that I have in regards to Commander Chakotay's activities prior to his coming aboard Voyager will be of interest to Starfleet," Tuvok answered, "but I must point out that it is no longer relevant to the Commanders character. His service aboard this ship has proven that he is loyal, trustworthy and honest. In addition, his dedication to Starfleet and the Federation has been frequently established over the past seven years. It would be illogical to assume that he is the same person that you were sent to capture."
Kathryn had to keep from smiling after hearing the Vulcans words. "I'm sure Commander Chakotay would be gratified to hear you say that, Tuvok. Lets just hope that Starfleet agrees with you."
Raising an elegant eyebrow, he replied, "Indeed, Captain, indeed."
- * * * * *
"Captain Janeway, would you please come with me." She was escorted to a room with a long table and several chairs. The security guard motioned for her to take a seat then left her alone. Moments later the door opened again to reveal Admiral Paris.
"Admiral…" She rose from the chair when she saw him.
"…Kathryn," he interrupted quickly, "I don't have much time, but I thought you might like to know what was happening to your crew. First…the good news. The majority of them have been debriefed and released to join their families. The Equinox crewmembers have also been released. Starfleet Command has determined that the ultimate responsibility for the actions taken by them, was Captain Ransom's. They were simply following orders as required.
Starfleet Medical is very interested in the modifications made to your EMH", the Admiral sounded a bit surprised,"and I expect a long collaboration. Both Ensign Kim and Lt. Commander Tuvok have completed debriefing and are with their families. According to the Doctor, your security officer is expected to make a complete recovery. By the way, Ensign Kim's parents asked me to give you a message. It seems that they are anxious to meet you, and to say thank you for 'giving him a chance to command'? I assume that you understand all that."
Kathryn smiled, Harry's parents had every reason to be very proud of him. "As for Seven of Nine and Icheb," the Admiral continued, "they are still undergoing debriefing, but I'm confident that they too will be released. Seven has far to much tactical knowledge of the Borg for Starfleet to ignore and they don't want to take the chance of antagonizing her. Icheb might even be able to make it into the
next class at the academy..."
"…and the bad news?" she asked.
"It seems that Starfleet isn't ready to budge on its position about the Maquis or you." The Admiral continued. " They feel that the Maquis among your crew got off too easily. While they were out gallivanting around the Delta Quadrant, other members in this quadrant were being arrested and sent to penal colonies. Admiral Necheyev, and several others, feels that your group should receive the same treatment. As for you, once again Necheyev is leading the warparty to have you court-martialed. She wants you brought up on charges of violating the Prime Directive and treason."
"Treason! On what grounds?" Her voice began to rise.
"On the grounds that you allowed a known enemy of the Federation access to top secret weapons and tactical information of an Intrepid Class starship!" The Admiral was becoming agitated himself.
"Chakotay?!" She couldn't believe what she was hearing.
"Yes, Chakotay. Even assigning a Maquis as your Chief Engineer pales in comparison to the fact that you made that man your First Officer." He was practically yelling by now.
Janeway's voice matched his as she turned to face him, hands on her hips. "'That man' is the best First Officer that I have ever served with and if not for him, the successful melding of our two crews would never have been accomplished. He is personally responsible, in so many ways, for Voyager having made it home. Making him my First Officer was the best command decision I ever made in my entire career." Now she was angry and she didn't care who knew it.
Admiral Paris bit back the angry reply he was about to make. He knew that yelling would accomplish nothing, so he tried to regain his composure, "Let's just hope it isn't the last one of your career."
"I'm sorry, Owen," she sighed, attempting to rub away the beginnings of a headache, "I didn't mean to take it out on you. But if you had been out there, with us, you would understand. I had no one to turn to; we were alone 75 years from home… from Starfleet. It was years before we were even able to let you know that we were still alive. Try to imagine it… no Admiralty to fall back on… trying to make decisions on a daily basis that would determine if my crew lived or died and knowing all along that no matter what happened it was all my responsibility and mine alone."
She looked in his eyes and saw only understanding and compassion there.
He sighed. "Try not to worry, Kathryn. I'll do everything I can to help. Is there anything that you need?"
She laughed bitterly; "Just to be out of here…no…really…I'm fine. How are the others? Are Tom and B'Elanna together…? What about Miral, where is she…? Are the Maquis personnel being treated well…? Oh, Owen, I really hate not knowing what's going on!"
He chuckled at her impatience, "Just a minute, Kathryn! I can only answer one question at a time. Yes, Tom and B'Elanna have been allowed to stay together, and they have Miral with them. The Doctor has visited on several occasions and says that they are all doing fine...," he hesitated for a moment, "...Kathryn, about Tom. He really has grown up during these last seven years. Thank you, for giving me my son back."
She heard the gratitude in his voice and smiled. "Don't thank me, Owen. Tom did the growing up all on his own...well, he might have had some help from B'Elanna."
"Yes," he laughed, "she's quite a woman, my daughter-in-law, and she has given me a beautiful granddaughter..." For a moment he stood there lost in thought. "...Now, as I was saying about your crew. The Maquis crewmembers, they are all being treated as well as the Starfleet personnel. They haven't been allowed to see each other, but other than that, I don't believe there have been any complaints. I do want to commend you on your entire crews' behavior. They have cooperated fully, as good as any Starfleet crew I've ever seen. You have every right to be proud of them, Captain."
"Thank you, Admiral. I am proud of them, more than you can imagine." She spoke softly, almost afraid to ask the next question. "What about Commander Chakotay, how is he doing?"
The Admiral looked at her suspiciously, not quite sure what he was hearing in her voice. "He's doing just fine. He's already been questioned twice. He did request, a few times, to speak to Seven of Nine…she had asked the same thing too…" He was watching her closely as he spoke. "…but, so far, no contact has been allowed."
He moved toward her and placed his hand on her shoulders. "Kathryn, are you all right? I'm worried about you. Are you getting enough rest?"
She snorted, "Yes… rest is the least of my worries right now, Owen. I don't have much else to do but rest.
I'm just worried about my crew... we worked so hard to get here and now this is happening… how much longer, Owen?"
"They will probably begin questioning you in a few days. After that, hopefully, the members of the review board will realize that this whole thing is ridiculous, and you and your crew will be released. It won't be much longer, Kathryn."
As he spoke the doors opened to reveal the security guard once again waiting for her.
"Well, it looks as if my 'date' is here to escort me safely back to my quarters. Thank you, Admiral, for the pep talk and the information." She turned and headed out the door, into the corridor, followed closely by the guard.
- ** * * *
It's my own fault anyway. I pushed him away so often, it's no wonder that he found someone else. I gave him no encouragement, no hint as to how I really felt… but he must have known. All those years of flirting on the bridge… dinners in my quarters…all the touches. Now, I know that I touch everyone… but surely he notice that I touched him more? She was beginning to get angry, which, if truth were told, felt pretty good right now. Was he blind…? He had to understand that I couldn't say anything. After all, the ship and the crew had to come first. He, of all people, had to realize that a relationship was not possible. He had first hand experience... just look at what happened with Seska!
Now she was really angry! She slammed her coffee cup down as she yelled aloud, "So I really was alone all along!"
As hot coffee spilled over her and the desk, she immediately began to calm down. "Now, Kathryn, you know that's not true. It's not really his fault. In all those years you never gave him one reason for real hope. He had no idea that you daydreamed about him and the life you would have together, when you got home. Just because you knew you were in love with him, didn't mean he knew. Yes, he had made it clear on New Earth, and later, that he loved you. But even the strongest love wouldn't last long if it's not nurtured and encouraged to grow. He probably stopped loving you in self-defense. You can only stand to be hurt so many times before you no longer feel anything at all."
She muttered to herself as she cleaned the spilt coffee, "Great, now you're talking to yourself. That's the sign of a healthy mind." She needed to accept that Chakotay had moved on and try to be happy for him.
But try as she may, she still couldn't get past the part that hurt the most…Seven. Of all the people on the ship, why Seven? Even though she knew she had no right to, she felt betrayed on two fronts.
Kathryn was aware that many of the crew indulged in idle speculation about her relationship with the Commander. She even knew of Tom's betting pools… and their lack of activity of late. Was Seven completely unaware of this? Did she initiate the relationship with Chakotay, not knowing of the crews' suspicions? Or was it those suspicions that caught her interest? Did she…could she…have done this just to hurt her?
She sat on the couch, once again chastising herself. "There you go again, driving yourself crazy with questions that can't be answered. Just let it go, Kathryn. Whatever you may have hoped for, obviously is not going to happen. Be glad that at least someone ends up happy. Even if it isn't you…and stop talking to yourself!"
- * * * * *
"Captain Janeway, I'm glad to see you again. I came in first to explain to you what is going to happen today. A board of four Admirals, and Vice Admiral Cartwright, will question you in reference to the allegations against you. First of all, this is not a formal hearing. It is simply a questioning session to determine if there is enough justification to bring you up on charges."
When he saw the panicked look in her eyes he quickly added, "Which is not going to happen! Do you have any questions?"
She was quite for moment, trying to come to terms with what was happening. "Will any of my crew be here?" she finally asked.
"No, this is a closed session. But if it comes out the way I believe it will, you'll be seeing them all very soon. There is one other thing that you should know. All the Maquis have been released, with the exception of Chakotay…"
His comment startled her. "…What…why Chakotay?"
"He was their leader, he was ultimately responsible for what they did. I should also tell you that whatever is the outcome here will probably have an effect on his case. The feeling is that if no charges are brought against you then he will be free to go also." He placed his hands on her shoulders.
"The others will be coming in now. Just relax and answer any questions honestly. Good luck, Kathryn."
She attempted a small smile, "Thank you, Owen, for everything."
No sooner had she spoken, then the door opened again and four people filed in. She recognized Vice Admiral Cartwright and Admiral Necheyev. The other two Admirals were unknown to her. Admiral Paris joined the group at the table as they all sat. She remained standing, facing them.
"Captain Kathryn Janeway, this board is convened to determine if there is just cause to bring you to court-martial for your willful disregard of the Prime Directive during your time in the Delta Quadrant and the more serious offense of treason. Do you understand?" Vice Admiral Cartwright's words brought a cold thrill of fear down Kathryn's spine.
She answered with a clear and even voice. "Yes, I understand, Admiral."
"Please be seated, Captain. We will begin by addressing the matter of the Prime Directive. Do any of the board member have questions they wish to ask?"
Admiral Necheyev was of course more than willing to begin. "Captain Janeway, can you explain to us why, on so many occasions, you chose to ignore all the principles and policies that govern not only Starfleet, but the Federation itself? Starting with the unjustified interference in the local politics of the Kazon and Ocampa, resulting in the destruction of the Caretaker's array and the stranding of you in the Delta Quadrant. It seems to me, Captain that you exhibited an unacceptable level of interest in other cultures business. Time and again, you violated the Prime Directive and involved your ship in illegal activities. Not to mention, the numerous 'alliances' with societies that did not meet the requirement of being technologically equal with the Federation."
Taking a deep breath she tried to form an answer that would help them all to understand why she had done what she'd done. "Your absolutely right. I did all those things and more. You've seen my logs; I never tried to hide anything. And if I had been in the Alpha Quadrant, I would fully expect to be court-martialed…" This brought several startled looks from the table, to include Necheyev who was beginning to smile. "…But I was in the Delta Quadrant…"
"…Captain Janeway," Admiral Necheyev smile had faded and was replaced by a sneer, "if you think being in the Delta Quadrant absolves you of your responsibilities…"
"…No, on the contrary, it increased my responsibilities. To keep my crew and ship safe I had to use any and all methods available to me. Even if they went against all that I had learned at the academy. I had always stood by my belief in Starfleet and the Prime Directive. I couldn't conceive of any reason to violate those policies. Yet, there I was, right from the start, doing just that. Why…To save the Ocampa? That was certainly part of it. To maintain the balance of power in that sector? Definitely. The Kazon were bullies preying on weaker species. But mostly, because we were there. In the Delta Quadrant, on our own. No back up, no space stations for repairs when needed, no resupply depots, no Starfleet to ask for advice. In the Delta Quadrant the buck stopped at my desk and I learned quickly that it was no place for those unable or unwilling to protect themselves. Did I break the Prime Directive? Some may say I did, but I like to think simply that I bent it where it would do the most good."
The scowl on Admiral Necheyevs face indicated that she didn't exactly agree with her assesement.
"Captain Janeway, did you ever willingly trade Federation technology with less technologically advanced cultures?"
Admiral Paris' question surprised Janeway. "No, Admiral, I did not."
"Did you ever use Federation technology to force an unwilling culture to trade with you?"
She began to see what he was getting at. "No, Admiral, I did not."
"Thank you, Captain, that's all the questions I have."
Vice Admiral Cartwright spoke up next. "Now,Captain Janeway, as to the accusation of treason. Did you allow access to top secret Starfleet weapons and tactical information to unauthorized personnel?"
Janeway answered with confidence. " No Admiral, the only personnel to have access to that information were members of Voyager's crew, specifically, my senior staff."
"Liar!" Admiral Necheyev spoke with venom in her voice. "You all but handed over Voyager to known enemies of the Federation. Chakotay was an outlaw and a traitor! All he had to do, was mount a mutiny, and all that technology would have been at his disposal."
"But no mutiny ever occurred!" Janeway's voice was beginning to break.
"No thanks to you!" The Admiral practically spat the words out.
"Admiral Necheyev…!" Admiral Paris' voice was angry.
"…You're right!" A sudden hush fell over the room. "It was no thanks to me, but it was thanks to Commander Chakotay. The most loyal, honest and trustworthy man I have ever met. True, I didn't know that about him then, but I also knew I had no choice but to trust him." She took a deep breath to calm herself before she went on. "We were lost, 75,000 light years from home. I needed his crew to run Voyager, and I knew the only way to get them was with him. I suppose if I were to have followed Starfleet protocols, at that time, I would have found a M-class planet, settled down and destroyed my ship, so that none of the technology could be used by others. But I wasn't willing to settle for that. I made my crew a promise…that I would get them home. And I intended to do just that. During the seven years that it took to fulfill that promise, I insisted that Voyager be a Starfleet ship…with a Starfleet crew. Thanks to him, it always was. He convinced his people to adhere to the principles that I had insisted on. If not for him, the Maquis crew probably would have mutinied. But he knew what I knew, that if we were to have any chance in this new and extremely dangerous quadrant, we had to work together. So here we are seven years later, not two crews, Maquis and Starfleet…but one crew…Voyager's crew, a Starfleet crew. "
The room filled with silence. Vice Admiral Cartwright stared at Admiral Necheyev as if to ask if she was satisfied. When she said nothing more, he spoke to the room.
"Since there are no further questions for Captain Janeway, this board will retire to consider its decision.
Captain Janeway you are free to return to your quarters." The group at the table rose and left the room.
- * * * *
She waited in the room where she had been question yesterday for only a few minutes, when the board of Admirals joined her. As soon as they were seated, Vice Admiral Cartwright directed her to take a seat.
He spoke first, "Captain Janeway, may I first commend you on having an extraordinarily loyal crew. During the extensive debriefings we've conducted, all of them, to include the Maquis and the Equinox crew, steadfastly stood by you and all the decisions you made while in the Delta Quadrant. They didn't always like them, but they believed that you always did what was best for them and the ship."
"Thank you, Admiral, I am very proud of them. They are, as far as I'm concerned, the best crew in either quadrant." She stated proudly. "If not for them, Voyager, would never have lasted in the Delta Quadrant as long as we did."
The room was silent for a few moments before the Admiral spoke again.
"Captain Kathryn Janeway, this board has considered whether to hold you for court-martial on the charges of violating the Prime Directive and treason. We have questioned you and your crew and reviewed of all your tactical logs. After long discussion between members of this board, it has been determined that despite the fact that your methods and decisions were questionable, being in the Delta Quadrant required innovative and unorthodox tactics. It is therefore the decision of this board that no charges will be brought against you. You and all of your crew, still being held, are to be released immediately. And may I say, Captain Janeway, well done and welcome home."
Kathryn let out a breath that she didn't know she'd been holding. As the other members of the board left the room Admiral Paris was pulling her from her chair, into a quick embrace.
"You see, I told you everything would be all right," he said excitedly. "You might like to know that Commander Chakotay is being released as we speak."
She looked at him as she noted his use of Chakotay's rank.
He chuckled at her look. "Yes, all the former Maquis have been allowed to retain their rank and positions in Starfleet if they choose to."
As they spoke, the door opened to reveal the object of their discussion. Seeing the look in Kathryn's eyes, the Admiral excused himself and quickly left the room, leaving Kathryn and Chakotay alone.
For what seemed like forever the two just stared at each other, neither speaking, not knowing what to say.
Chakotay finally decided to begin.
"Well, Kathryn, you actually did it. You got all of us home, and kept your promises to the Maquis too."
"No, Chakotay…we got us home." She stepped close to him and placed her hands on his chest, a gesture that she had done many times before. She didn't miss his slight intake of breath at the movement, but she decided to keep her hands where they were. "I never would have been able to do all this, if not for you standing by me. The crew would have lost faith in me long ago, if not for you. So many times, when I had lost faith in myself and didn't have the nerve to face them, you were there, covering for me. I once told you, 'I couldn't imagine a day without you'. I meant it then and I still do. Neither Voyager, the crew or I would be here today, if not for you. Having you by my side meant more to me than you'll ever know. Thank you, Chakotay, for everything."
"Kathryn…" he was shocked to hear her words. He never realized she felt this way. He reached up to enclose her hands with his large ones. "Well, you're welcome of course. But I think you would have found a way to survive without me, if you had to. That's something you very good at, Kathryn, surviving. You were determined to get this crew home, and you did just that. It was that… determination, that… single-mindedness of yours that made the difference. This crew would have followed you to Hell and back, with or without me, if you had asked them."
She withdrew her hands from his. "And what about you, Chakotay," she asked quietly, "would you have followed me too, or would you have stayed with Seven?"
His shocked look told her that he was completely unaware that she knew of the relationship.
Quietly he asked, "How did you find out?"
A sad sort of smile graced her face, "The Admiral told me, in her attempt to convince me to go back to the transwarp hub. It seems that in her timeline, you and Seven eventually get married."
"Spirits, Kathryn, I'm so very sorry you had to find out like that," he whispered softly.
Gathering her dwindling courage, she looked him in the eye. "Why didn't you tell me? Why did I have to learn about it from someone else"
The stricken look on her face tore at Chakotay's heart. The last thing he ever intended was to cause her pain.
"Because I'm a coward."
"You, Chakotay? You're one of the bravest people I know."
"Not when it comes to you, Kathryn. I can't bear to see you hurt, especially when it's me doing the hurting."
"After all these years of me hurting you, I suppose I had it coming."
"No, don't ever think that. You always did what you believed you had to do. The ship and the crew always had to come first. Yes, it hurt me, but I know that it hurt you too."
She turned away, unable to look at him as she whispered her next question.
"Why Seven?"
The anguish in her voice brought tears to his eyes. Taking a deep breath he answered, "Because she asked."
Janeway whirled to face him, eyes sparking with suppressed anger and pain.
"She asked you? That's all it took, for her to ask you? You turn your back on us, go willingly into her arms just because she asked you?"
Chakotay's voice began to rise in anger.
"What do you mean 'turned my back on us'? There is no 'us' Kathryn, there never has been any 'us'. You made that perfectly clear. At least with Seven I always knew exactly where I stood. A situation that I never enjoyed with you. She hasn't learned how to control her emotions yet, so she was always bluntly honest with me."
Chakotay sighed to calm himself down.
"Kathryn, for years I have stood by you, waiting…never sure just how you felt. Some days I was convinced that you had real feelings for me, feelings that went beyond friendship. Other times I was just as sure that you didn't care if I was even your friend any more. Several times I tried to move on and forget what I felt, but it never worked, and I always let myself slip back into my old habit of standing by and waiting."
Taking a deep breath he continued, "When Seven told me about her 'research' and asked me if I would 'assist' her, I was surprised at first. After all, we never really got along socially. I thought about it for awhile and realized that I was flattered… I am human …and I'd spent so much time being pushed away by you that when a young, beautiful woman offered, my ego was definitely interested."
"I also understood that this would all be new to her… she would be falling in love for the first time, when everything is fresh and unspoiled by past experiences. That appealed to me and I believed that for a first relationship perhaps I could offer her something that someone younger might not be able to."
"We were finally able to speak to each other a few days ago. It seems that the past two weeks have given us a lot of time to think, Kathryn. We both agreed that the whole thing was a mistake. Seven was simply reacting to, what she thought, was the most logical choice she could make and not because of any real attraction to me personally. Neither of us is prepared to continue the relationship. At least she wasn't hurt by the experience and I think she may have learned a great deal about herself."
Chakotay fell silently, watching Janeway, trying to gauge her reaction to his 'confession'. Looking into her eyes, he found them bright with unshed tears. It hurt him deeply to realize that he had caused her all this pain. He turned to leave the room, believing that she would rather be alone right then. He was almost to the door when she spoke.
"Oh, Chakotay, what a mess we've made of our lives." He turned to see her standing there with tears falling softly down her cheeks. He couldn't remember ever having seen her cry. "All these years, all I dreamed of was making a life with you when we got home, it's what kept me sane. Yet here we are, finally home, and we seem farther apart than we ever were on Voyager. What are we going to do? Can we get past this, and stop hurting each other…or is this all there ever will be for us?"
He reached her in only three steps and enfolded her in his arms. She could feel his heart beating beneath her cheek. Being in his arms gave her a feeling of such peace.
"Oh, Chakotay, I love you. I'm so very sorry for the hell I put you through all these years…"
"…Hush, Kathryn. It's all behind us now." He held her face in his hands, so that he could look into her eyes. "I love you, and I plan on spending the rest of my life showing you just how much. Never again will you have reason to doubt my feelings."
Their lips meet for the first time. The kiss was full of all the suppressed longing and passion of seven years of waiting. Eager and hard, yet gentle and shy, reflecting a relationship still unsure of itself, but growing more confident by the minute. They broke the kiss only when breathing became a necessity. As they stood in each other's embrace, their frantic breath slowly calmed.
"You know, the crew is waiting to see you. They've having a party and I had to promise to make sure you attended." Chakotay told her.
"That seems pretty confident of them. What if I hadn't been released?" She smiled her crooked little half smile that he loved. He in turn produced those wicked dimples. "Failure was never an option. I believe that Starfleet would have had a full scale mutiny on their hands if you had been court-martialed."
She laughed as she took him by the arm and headed for the door. "Then by all means, lets go join our family."
Finis