Mood of this message:
I will always love Mooch.
An All Dogs to Heaven/101 Dalmatians parody.
(Sasha and Charlie enjoy few root beers over their past
victories.)
Charlie: Here's to Gabriel's Horn.
Sasha: And Christmas
'98.
(They clink their mugs together and drink down.)
Charlie: I'm glad
this place allows free eats now that Carface has gone.
Sasha: What about
Killer?
Charlie: Don't you remember?
(Charlie snaps his fingers. Killer
walks up with a platter.)
Charlie: He's our new busboy.
Killer: What can
I get you?
Charlie: One cheese-steak. We'll split it.
(Killer walks
off.)
Sasha: You're something else.
(The 2 dogs ready to kiss. They're
interrupted by a voice.)
Annabelle: Charlie.
Charlie: Oh, no. Not
tonight. Guardian angel business again?
Annabelle: Yes. But since you need
a break, I'm asking Sasha to participate in this assignment.
Sasha: We'll
meet in the junkyard. These walls have ears.
(Later, Sasha follows the aura
to the junkyard. Annabelle is reclining on the hood of a
Porsche.)
Annabelle: We have a problem at Dearly Farm, USA. A teenage pup
by the name of Mooch is heartbroken. His girlfriend, Cadpig, left him for
another guy of equal stature. I need you to get Cadpig and Mooch back
together.
Sasha: Sounds hard.
Annabelle: I know. So I'm giving you a
miracle collar.
(Sasha holds her front paws out. The collar appears
there.)
Annabelle: Get Cadpig to wear it, and her future will flash before
her eyes.
Sasha: That sounds even harder.
Annabelle: Good luck. Oh, I
almost forgot.
(Annabelle waves her paw over Sasha and she appears right in
Dearly Farm.)
Annabelle: Don't forget. Cadpig and Mooch need to see each
other again.
(She disappears.)
Sasha: Okay. Here goes.
(We see Cadpig
walking with El Diablo. Exactly where we left off.)
Cadpig: You know, the
Napoleon complex is cute, but there's always room to grow. Have you ever
considered elevator shoes?
(Sasha's in a tree. She picks an apple and aims
it above El Diablo.)
Sasha: Don't fail me now, Newton.
(She drops the
apple. It instead hits Cadpig on the head. She passes out.)
El Diablo: Are
you ok, Miss?
(He checks for a pulse.)
El Diablo: No, she's not dead.
Just unconscious.
(He runs off to get help. Sasha climbs down and makes the
switch. The miracle starts by waking Cadpig up.)
Cadpig: Elly?
El
Diablo: You're awake.
Cadpig: Where were we?
El Diablo: You thought I
should wear platform shoes.
(The couple continues to walk off.)
Sasha:
Now all I got to do is wait.
(She does. Night falls very quickly. Sasha
appears in the barn wearing her Ghost of Christmas Present costume. She then
wakes Cadpig up. She screams.)
Cadpig: Who are you?
Sasha: I'm your
guardian angel. I'm here to tell you El Diablo is wrong for you.
Cadpig: I
see. You're here because I left Mooch.
Sasha: Yes. And boy is he
heartbroken.
Cadpig: Wait. Is this going to be some "It's a Wonderful Life"
knock-off?
Sasha: Yes. Only this is a matter of love not suicide.
(The 2
dogs appear before Mooch, who's still crying.)
Sasha: Mooch was head over
heels for you when you beat him for his abuse to Rolly.
Cadpig: I felt the
same way when he gave me that smelly, old boot.
Sasha: He's been
lovey-dovey since you've been dating. And he still is.
Cadpig: It's my
fault he lost the match. El Diablo isn't a sucker for insightful
messages.
Sasha: Who is?
Cadpig: Nobody. Except me. I'm the only one
who's clarity-ridden and affirmational.
Sasha: But that's a good
thing.
Cadpig: How so?
(Sasha takes Cadpig to 2015. She and Mooch are
full-grown and they have 5 children.)
Cadpig: Wow! I'm a married
woman.
Sasha: And this dream can come true if you listen closely.
Adult
Cadpig: Moochie. Is dinner ready?
(Adult Mooch comes out. He brings out a
T-bone steak garnished with assorted fruit slices. It's already cut into 7
regions.)
Adult Mooch: Come and get it, kids.
(They grab their regions
and start gnawing away. The happy couple sits together. They rub
noses.)
Cadpig: Yes. That would be nice.
Sasha: Now to get you away from
El Diablo.
(Sasha transfers Cadpig to a parallel universe. El Diablo is
Cadpig's husband and the kids are beating each other up, tearing the house
apart, etc.)
Cadpig: Is this…
Sasha: No. But it will be if you don't
change sides.
(El Diablo is yelling at Cadpig and hitting her.)
Adult
Cadpig: (crying) Ouch! Stop it! Why are you doing this?
Adult El Diablo:
Because you're a jerk. You said all jerks need to be impounded like
oatmeal.
Adult Cadpig: That affirmation didn't apply to me.
Sasha: If
you stay with El Diablo, he'll always be abusive to you.
Cadpig: And Mooch
won't?
(Sasha nods.)
Cadpig: I need to see him.
Sasha: You'll have to
wait until morning. You need your sleep.
(Sasha snaps her fingers. Cadpig
appears back in the barn in present time.)
Cadpig: Whoa! What a
nightmare.
(Cadpig then recovers and goes back to sleep. The next day, she
goes to Mooch's pad.)
Cadpig: Mooch?
Mooch: What is it?
(Cadpig gives
Mooch a smelly, old boot.)
Mooch: (gasps) For me?
Cadpig: I'm just
making up to you. You already did the same thing for me when we first
met.
Mooch: So, you wanna go practice Yoga?
Cadpig: Sure,
Moochie.
(The 2 walk off together happily next to each other. Elsewhere,
Sasha returns to the Flea Bite Café.)
Charlie: How did it go?
Sasha:
Fine. They love each other again.
Charlie: Who loves who again?
Sasha:
Just a couple of farm denizens.
(Sasha winks at the camera as the iris
pulls out.)