Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon(sadly),
however, I do own Yamato and Koushiro! ::attacked::
A/N: My first attempt at writing a Kenyako.
Though this coupling is my 4th favorite(straight pairing), I love the pairing,
and decided that I should write about their mixed emotions, which take place
after Ken is no longer the Kaizer.
To Win Your Heart
The
beads of sweat surrounded his brow as he stood there, his hair blowing in the
wind. His heart was beating so loudly in his chest, he was sure Wormmon could
hear it loud and clear. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he proceeded onward.
Where? He had no clue. His mind thirst for knowledge, his heart for truth.
"Ken-chan,
we've been wondering aimlessly for the past hour. What's wrong?" Wormmon
suddenly spoke. Ken shivered, then shook his head.
"My
heart and mind are empty. After everything that happened...I don't even have
hate in my heart. I'm nothing if I have nothing to contain within myself."
"That's
not true, Ken-chan."
"Yes,
it is, Wormmon! It is true! How can I be human if I don't have the emotions,
the knowledge, the true being of a human if I don't have those
qualities?!" Ken felt helpless.
"But
you're human to me. That's all that matters, right?" Wormmon's eyes
sparkled as he looked up at Ken. Ken looked back at him, his eyes glittering
with the tears that built up in them. He slowly nodded. "If you believe
it, then I guess that I should be glad at least one person thinks so."
They
fell silent, letting the wind whisper in their ears as they stood there,
watching the sun set. Ken sighed. "It's still hopeless."
"Why
do you think it's hopeless?"
"I'm
not good enough...I'm not good enough for the one person I want to be good
for."
"Ken-chan,
I'm sure your parents will still love you, even if you were to declare you were
going to rule the world and tied them up and let me use them as soccer
balls."
"I'm
talking about someone else! Not my family! And if you think they'll be used for
your leisure, think again!"
Wormmon
jumped at the harsh tone. "Sorry."
A
loud sigh escaped Ken's lips. "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at
you. Wormmon...I'm helplessly in love...pathetic for one my age, and especially
pathetic to think I could actually win this girl's heart when she hates me so
much."
"No
girl hates you. Why do you think they still have those secret cameras in the
bathroom...er, I mean..."
Ken
shot him a death glare. "Shut. Up."
Silence
followed once again, then, there was the loud chattering of voices not far from
them. Before he could react, Daisuke and the group popped up in front of him.
Ken froze as he stared at them, his mouth and eyes wide open, unsure if he
should run away, or stand there like an idiot.
"Keeeeeen!!!!"
Daisuke cried happily. Ken stood there as Daisuke ran over to him, flailing his
arms around. "I'm so happy you're here! You've decided to join us after
all!"
The
other four stood back, unsure if they should join Daisuke and be happy. Iori
and Miyako looked disgusted the most. Ken looked at them, and glanced at
Miyako's eyes, only to receive a dirty look back. In shame, he looked back at
the ground, turning red.
"We
really need your help in repairing this place, y'know?" Daisuke continued
to babble.
"We
don't need his help," Miyako blurted suddenly. "He'll probably
destroy the place while he's at it, like before."
Ken
couldn't say anything. "It wasn't his fault!" Daisuke fired back in
Ken's defense. "You and I know that just as well as everyone else!"
"That
doesn't mean that isn't his real nature."
"Well,
I guess it's your nature to judge people without giving them a second chance! I
know Ken is different!"
"You
keep at it like this and you'll be brainwashed for sure," Miyako muttered,
walking off. "Instead of standing here and trying to befriend our enemy,
I'm going home for dinner!"
"That's
right! I forgot about the time!" Iori said, running after her.
Daisuke
turned his direction to the silent Takeru and Hikari, his eyes pleading for
help. "You agree with me, right?"
"I'd
rather give it some time before I make a final decision," Takeru replied
without hesitating or stuttering. Daisuke knew that he wasn't holding back on
his true thoughts, and that Ken might actually have a second thought about Ken.
Hikari nodded in agreement with Takeru.
"I'm
grateful you want to be my friend and you stand up for me, but I think you
should get home now before your family starts worrying," Ken suddeny
spoke.
"What
about your family? Won't they be worried?" Hikari asked.
"My
family...does not know that I am even awake yet. But I think it would be best
if you went on ahead of me. I wouldn't want your families to wait at my
discretion."
All
three hesitated somewhat before leaving, Daisuke being the last to look back
and disappear behind a bush. "Miyako hates me...so much it hurts,"
Ken cried to Wormmon.
"Miyako-san
doesn't hate you...she just doesn't know if you can be trusted."
"She
does too hate me. Didn't you see the look she gave me!?"
"Uh...no."
Ken
wiped his yes and stormed off. "Some friend and help you are! You can't
make me feel any better!"
Wormmon
just stood there before reacting. "But everytime I try, you eat my head!
It won't be able to regenerate if you keep it up!"
***
"You
can't hate him forever."
"Yes,
we can!" Iori and Miyako said at the same time, glaring at Daisuke.
"I
would never give him a second chance!" Iori said coldly.
"That's
right! You saw what he did! Why would we trust him? He could turn on us while
our backs are turn and we're not expecting anything!" Miyako agreed.
Daisuke
was furious, lost and confused of how to convince them that Ken was a different
person. He was no longer the influence he was before, however, Iori and Miyako
were terribly stubborn in accepting this fact.
"You
should give him another chance...to prove that he's not who you think he
is!" Daisuke pointed out. However, the look Iori and Miyako gave him made
him feel helpless and know he could never change their opinion of Ken.
"Well, don't come begging me to give you guys second chances for
anything!"
They
watched him walk off. "If he think I'll give that guy a second chance,
he's outta his mind!" Iori snorted.
Miyako
stood there quietly. Inside her heart, she knew Ken was different, but in her
mind, she couldn't trust him.
***
The
next day in the Digiworld only made Ken feel queasy, not joyous or better.
Looking at what he created made him sick. Sick to his stomach. He wanted to
vomit until he couldn't anymore, but with an empty stomach, he had to bite his
tongue and walk on.
"This
isn't that bad," Wormmon cheerfully said, walking through the forest.
Ken
scoffed. "That's what you think. You didn't do this. I did. I have a right
to feel ashamed. No wonder Miyako hates me so much...I destroyed so much, and
hurt so many. I deserve what I get."
"Don't
be so hard on yourself, Ken-chan. I'm sure it's just a temporary side effect.
She'll get over it and you can ask her out on a date."
"Ask
who on a date?" a voice suddenly peeped.
Turning
around quickly, Ken saw Veemon and Daisuke standing behind them. He jumped,
startled. "H-How long have you been here?!"
"We
just happened to hear Wormmon say something about you asking some girl on a
date. Who's the girl?" Daisuke asked, his eyes full of curiosity.
"N-No
one. Don't worry about it," Ken mumbled, adverting his eyes to avoid
Daisuke's. He shuffled his feet, then turned around and walked on. "It's
nothing that important for you to worry about anyway."
"Is
it Hikari? Cause if it is, you better think twice! You'd meet ends with both
min and Taichi's fists!" Dai added a smack with his hands.
Ken
looked at him with a sour face. "I know better than to mess with Takeru's
girl. And you should, too."
"Takeru's?!
Who said they claimed each other? Certainly not me!"
"I
think you should get over it. She already shows a lot of affection towards him.
Get a hint." With that, Ken realized that what he was saying applied to
him as well. I'm only telling him what I should be telling myself. Why can't I
just get over Miyako? Why must I wallow in her anger, my pity and guilt and bow
before her to accept me? She should accept me as I am...yet, I'm doing so much
that isn't required to win her heart.
"Hey,
you're spacing out now." Daisuke waved a hand in his face. Ken looked at
him. "Sorry," he replied.
"You're
sorry about everything. Sometimes, I wonder if you'll get over the fact that we
don't hate you and quit apologizing for yourself."
Ken
stopped in his tracks, and Daisuke had to do his best to keep from running him
over from behind. "It's obvious a couple individuals do still hate me. I
don't blame them. I have to admit that you're so naive. I know you only mean
for the best, though."
The
silence left Ken knowing that Daisuke had nothing to say. Dai was speechless.
Then he began to utter,"K-Ken, I don't hold grudges. I believe everyone
deserves a second chance."
"All
except me. If you were one of the creatures I tortured, would you give me a
second chance?"
"If
my heart says so, then yes. You don't own the Crest of Kindness for nothing.
Ken, your heart is pure gold. But you're so vulnerable and it's not your
fault."
"I
know I'm vulnerable. It's because of my past...if I hadn't been so jealous of
my brother, maybe things wouldn't be like this."
"And
maybe you wouldn't have met us and had more friends. Cheer up, things happen
for the best!" Daisuke smiled.
Ken
only continued to frown. "Unless if it's in my case. I need time
alone."
Daisuke
only watched as Wormmon and Ken walked off. Veemon looked at him.
"Daisuke, will Ken ever forgive himself?"
"If
Iori and Miyako can ever forgive him...maybe. Until then, he can't because he
holds their hate on his shoulders as a sign of guilt."
a/n: Eep! o-o I finally finished the first
chapter! I think it's easy for me to put my place in Ken's shoes. Real easy,
and it makes my task of writing his thoughts and feelings such a breeze.
Probably cause I know what it's like to really, really like someone and not
know if they feel the same...^^;; (currently, I'm in that position...) Anyways,
please review! I hope you like it and more will eventually be posted! It does
draw on the lines of the 02 series, so it should seem a little familiar. whee~!
