Mixed Feelings Part Five


Mixed Feelings
Part Five
By: Laree McKenzie
Please send all comments to mackie@Phreaker.net

All right! So. I'm finally back! I'm so sorry that it took so long for me to get this part out but, here it is finally! Lol. If anyone cares!

It had been another exhausting day in a long line of them. Alone in his room, with nobody to fool with his unfailingly passive expression, Nakago let out a soft sigh. Walking over to his dresser after stowing away his heavy armor, he stared at himself intently on the mirror. The day had taken it's toll, he thought with a small smile. He scrunched his forehead up experimentally, searching for any unsightly lines that might have made it's appearance and seeing none, for the moment anyways, proceeded with his nightly rituals.

The Emperor was angry and when the Emperor was angry, he made everyone in the Palace suffer. It seemed as though the Imperial Fat Slob had gotten the news that the Suzaku Shichiseishi were lacking only one warrior as of this day, compared to the Seiryuu's two. They were missing Chiriko while the Seiryuu were searching for Ashitare and Miboshi, and of course, since he was the leader of the seishi, he had been the one to take all the heat.

Nakago had been very tempted to just blast the Emperor to hell as the man ranted and raved at him about his ineffectuality and his inability to complete such a simple task as finding two people. The thought that the Emperor would end up there sometime soon anyways had kept him from doing so but he had been so close! It would have been so easy for him to just get rid of the man, right then, right there. After all, the Lords of the Palace wouldn't have minded so much if the Emperor Shoukitei met a sudden demise. The man's extravagance was running the Empire to ruins, the peasants were unhappy and he was the one who controlled the country's military. Everything was set for his takeover so what was keeping him?

" I want him to suffer." Nakago said out loud to the empty room. Revenge wouldn't make his past any more pleasant than it had been when he looked back at it but it would make things feel so much easier. That man had wiped out a whole race of people, a way of living, a whole culture. Nothing would ever bring that back, nothing would ever make up for the abuse that he had suffered under the hands of the Emperor, but he could at least have his revenge. Eventually. He just had to bide his time.

As for now, he had to mollify the Emperor somehow. Indulge him and let him think that he was still very much in charge when for the past few months or so, it had been him running Kutou.

He wasn't overly worried about the Suzaku Menace, as Emperor Shoukitei referred to the situation. He didn't think the people of the Southern Empire posed much of a threat, especially not since they held one of the Seishi, Tamahome, and the Sacred Scroll .But he still had to devise some sort of ploy to appease the Emperor, though at the moment it seemed as though the scales were pretty much tipped to their favor.

It had been a stupid move on the Suzaku's part to allow Tamahome to come to Kutou as a hostage. What was one village when compared to the power that one could gain upon the summoning of the god? But then it was their misfortune that Suzaku just happened to be the patron of love. By now he had figured out that those people acted on their hearts. A stupid thing to do in a situation such as this.

Human emotions made you weak. Feelings such as love, pity and concern clouded your judgment, made you stupid and vulnerable. He had always managed to distance himself from everybody and anything, that had been what helped him rise to where he was now, so he was somewhat surprised by the way that, for the first time in years, somebody had managed to worm his way into his life.

He allowed this trail of his thoughts to peter off, not liking what it implicated. No. He was the same as always. Nothing in him had changed.

The sound of a flute drifted in from his open window. Amiboshi off again having one of his midnight concerts, Nakago thought, as he tried to work up the annoyance that he usually felt whenever the boy disturbed the nighttime peace with his incessant playing. He was unable to do so. Lately, he had come to actually like the comforting strains of the flute. It brought him some comfort, as it must also for the younger seishi.

Without thinking, not exactly knowing what he would do once in the company of the younger seishi, he followed the sound of the flute until he found Amiboshi, sitting on a grassy knoll by a group of willow trees that he had noticed was a favorite haunt of his whenever he wanted to go off for some solitude. He had been observing Amiboshi a lot lately... " Amiboshi? Do you really think it's wise to play your flute this late in the night when Tomo has been in such a bad mood all day?"

Startled from his music, Amiboshi let out a jarring note on his flute, his frown eventually turning into a hesitant smile when he saw who it was. Nakago couldn't remember the last time that anyone had smiled at him with true warmth. " Nakago-sama! What are you doing here?"

~**~

It wasn't true. It couldn't be true. There was no way in hell that that painted freak was right about this. He knew perfectly well that Tomo laughed at him because of his gullibility, but even he wasn't stupid enough to fall for such a stupid suggestion. " Does he think I'm a fucking spaz or something?!" Suboshi fumed, drop kicking his pillow, imagining it was a little Tomo that his foot made contact with instead of the soft, feather filled pillow. He proceeded to pace around his room, kicking the pillow around before him while cursing Tomo profusely under his breath. If his brother had been around, he would have told him off for using such foul language, Amiboshi was like that, always acting like some sort of mother hen, but the thing was that lately, his brother hadn't been around. " But it's not because of what that perverted freak thinks! "

There was a loud rapping on the door. " For the love of Seiryuu, Suboshi! I have to sleep. Even the perverted freak has to sleep! Will you give it a rest? You've been thumping around there for hours now! It's the middle of the night! If I have to electrocute you to within an inch of your life to get some quiet, I bloody well will!"

Letting out a loud cry of frustration, Suboshi leapt onto the fluffy white pillow and proceeded to stomp on it mercilessly. The door flew open, Soi stood there, bolts of raw energy crackling on her hands. " What is the matter with you? Have you finally lost your mind?!"

He jumped one more time on the pillow, before finally kicking it aside and glaring at Soi, his chest heaving with exertion.

" What's wrong, Suboshi?" Soi asked once more, her tone of voice softening slightly when he saw how worked up he was.

He didn't really think that Soi would want to hear about Tomo's suspicions. He would have loved to march over to that bastard right now and maybe cut him up a little, just enough to really hurt, but nothing fatal. He wasn't sure that Soi would be able to restrain herself though, when she heard about the things that that freak was saying. " It's nothing. I was just thinking about something is all, but it's really nothing. I'm just really worried about my brother is all." At least this was a half truth.

" Oh. Worried about Amiboshi, huh?" Soi bit her bottom lip, wondering how much the boy knew about his brother and what was going on. Of course the kid would know that there was something fishy going on, they were twins and they were extremely close after all, but she didn't think that Amiboshi really knew what it was that was bothering his brother. If he had, then he would probably had done something stupid by then, like try to attack that perverted Emperor. " Listen, about your brother, just try to be patient with him for a while. I know he hasn't been acting like himself lately at all but...He'll get over it. He will. I'm sure."

" But what is it that he needs to get over? Why won't he tell me anything anymore?"

Soi shrugged, backing towards the door to make her getaway. She really did need her sleep and she didn't think it was a good idea for the guy to find out about what was going on from her. " People change, Suboshi-chan. Good Night."

He scowled after her as she departed. He had the weird feeling that the others were keeping something very important from him. Something that would explain his brother's unusual behavior as of late. But what was it?

How was he supposed to sleep when he had all of this crap running through his mind? He already had enough trouble drifting off as it was ever since his brother had changed rooms, a fact that he had been mentioning a lot lately in attempt to make his brother feel guilty and now he had this to think about! Thinking had never been one of his fine points either!

He frowned as he was able to make out the faint strains of his brother's favorite song. So the guy was still awake. Dare he go and confront him about this or would he just sound stupid and succeed in embarrassing and angering his elder brother. He didn't need that. Things between the two of them were already strained enough as it was!

Soo...Basically, things can't get any worse than they are now! Suboshi told himself, frowning. And he really did need to find out the truth about Nakago and his brother! Was there really something going on between the two as Tomo had implied, or was it all a product of the man's twisted imagination? The only way he would find out was if he asked directly because he didn't think his brother would volunteer information any time soon, so it was either he ask him flat out right then or just spend a sleepless night of wondering...So, his curiosity getting the better of him, he decided to just go right out to the garden and confront his aniki.


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