Burning for You:
A Queen Amidala/Obi-Wan Romance
By obi's girl
Summary: While waiting for Obi-Wan, Amidala remembers her time with Obi-Wan, what he means to her and the consequences of loving a man she can't. Spoiler: Oh Yes. Episode 2 or 3, depending on what you think!
Disclaimer: The characters of Obi-Wan Kenobi, Queen Amidala, Anakin Skywalker & Palpatine (the s.o.b) don't belong to me but the almighty George Lucas. This was just an idea, inspired by one of my fanfiction authors, Theed. The poem Anakin is mine. It is original. Enjoy:)
We don't mean to hurt
But we do
No one ever thinks of consequences
What happens does,
No one can stop -
Not even our hearts
Amidala stared blankly at the city below as she waited for Obi-Wan to meet her. He was with the Jedi Council, thankfully without Anakin. She was glad because what she wanted to say to him Anakin couldn't hear. Over the past few months, Obi-Wan had been on Coruscant helping and assisting her in the Senate in Palpatine's place. Palpatine, the elected Chancellor was off on personal business and he asked her to fill in for him. Amidala didn't question what his "personal business" was but let him go. She called Obi-Wan asking him to assist her as a friend. He agreed. Now, he was talking to the Council regarding the Amidala's position in the Senate. She would be in there herself instead of having Obi-Wan speak for her but she was too preoccupied with a problem of the heart.
She was in love with Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. She didn't want to admit it to herself. After meeting for the first him, developing a crush on him and asking him to be in the Liberation Parade made matters more complicated. She had Anakin to consider another love that stole her heart. To him, she was his whole world and whole universe. Anakin was young but even then his heart burned for her as her heart burned for Obi-Wan.
Besides being a Jedi Master and older, was sensitive, caring and thoughtful. His Master sayings, as she called them, were small but with great meaning. He understood her. He understood that it wasn't easy for her sometimes to be a Senator and that all she wanted was to escape it all and be a girl. Note the reason for her alias Padmé Naberrie. He was sensitive. When she wanted to cry, he lent her his shoulder. He'd sit with her for hours even if she didn't say anything or just cry because she needed to. Obi-Wan was different and special. She didn't love him the way Anakin loved her. Unlike Anakin and his child hood crush on her, Obi-Wan didn't treat her like a prize. He treated her like a person with her own distinct personality and feelings. She loved him for that.
Amidala gazed at the chromotor. The Council Meeting had taken over an hour,
something that worried her.
She knew it was probably nothing. It was probably a mission briefing but she
needed to see him. Everything depended on this meeting hers' and Anakin's future.
She smiled, not able to believe a single man drew her future but it was true.
His feelings were what mattered. She needed to know if what she felt him, he
felt for her or some clue that he had felt something for her and it wasn't just
a dream.
He walked onto the balcony, smiling graciously at Amidala. He bowed before her, still smiling. She rolled her eyes, smiling back. "I'm not Royalty anymore, Obi-Wan. You don't have to bow before me,"
He stood straight, unable to suppress his grin. "I know your Highness. But even though you aren't, you're still Royalty to me."
Amidala blushed, playing with her bangs like a little girl. She scolded herself. She gazed at him. "How was the meeting? Did everything go well?"
The Jedi nodded yes. "I should hope so." But didn't elaborate something that eased her a bit. "Is something wrong?"
Amidala walked past him, brushing his shoulder slightly. "Obi-Wan, you know I am grateful to you for helping me these past few months. I know your services are probably better-suited elsewhere than chauffeuring a former Queen around..."
We can't help it
It's how we are
That will never change
And what will never change
Is how I feel about you
"Stop."
She looked at him dumbfounded.
"I'm not chauffeuring you around, my Queen. You are a dear friend and I care about you. I would do anything for you,"
She looked down, continuing what she was going to say. "And during that time period, we've been working very closely with each other. I value your impute and advice on matters and....I guess what I'm trying to say is - my heart has always belonged to one man but you changed that. You've made me question whether my love for Anakin is true and I have to ask you --- where does your heart lay Obi-Wan Kenobi?"
Obi-Wan gasped. He hoped the subject would never be brought up but it was and she deserved an answer. He stared into her brown eyes, "Where has it always been, my Queen?"
Angel
Amidala stepped closer to him, staring into his blue eyes. Her feelings - it wasn't one of a teenager crush but honest, emotional love and desire. He awakened something in her - something that was greater than Anakin. Obi-Wan started to lean towards her but remembered they were on the Jedi Balcony and that the Council was right around the corner and no doubt, heard what transpired between them. She frowned, furrowing her eyebrows.
"Is something wrong?" she whispered, caressing his cheek.
He didn't respond for a moment, staring off into the space. She asked him again. "Obi-Wan?"
The Jedi turned to her, smiling. "I'm sorry my Queen, but I'm afraid we have to move. We are not safe hear from prying ears and minds,"
She stepped back a bit, smiling less enthusiastically as before.
Thankfully, Anakin was in class when Obi-Wan and Amidala arrived at their apartment. They left the Balcony to be alone and away from the Jedi Council, but to be sure, he closed his mind to his Padawan, sending that he was in meditation. Amidala gazed around at the apartment as if she had never seen it before and was new, before lying her gaze on Obi-Wan. He smiled at her, pulling her towards her. She fell into his lap, bracing his neck with her arm.
He nodded stroking her cheeks, "You have no idea how long I've loved you."
"When did you know you loved me?"
Obi-Wan smiled pulling her hair down, "Before time. When I came here to speak with you, in recognition on liberation day. You looked more beautiful than the suns. As I was thinking that, as if on cue, sunshine poured through your windows, highlighting a halo around your head like an angel."
She blushed looking down again. Obi-Wan raised his hand, tilting her chin up, kissing her softly on the lips. Amidala fell short of breath feeling like she just woke up. His head fell down from her lips, drifting down her neck. Amidala whispered in his ear, "I always wanted you," It almost sounded like a cry to Obi-Wan. He smiled back at her. He always wanted her too but shunned her away because of Anakin. When she called him, asking only for his help, he couldn't say no. He could never say to her. Obi-Wan held her tighter, removing her white blouse with the Force. Amidala fell on the bed, ruffling her hair out of its bonds.
She smiled wickedly, "I always wanted to know what Jedi wore under those cloaks."
Obi-Wan lied down next to her supporting his head by his left arm. He smiled at her. "You have my permission to look,"
Amidala's face became silent. Her fingers undid his robe, belt and his shirt...
As Obi-Wan slept, Amidala could hardly believe the man lying next to her was the man she had been burning for her entire life. Obi-Wan was so beautiful. She smiled, thinking of her handmaidens. They all had crushes on him and it was no wander why. He was what many princess' dreamed of - the fantasy of a prince arriving on white stallion to rescue her from a witch or goblin. A witch or goblin didn't hold Amidala, but she did feel like Royalty.
Obi-Wan stirred, feeling her fingers brush his back. He turned over, smiling at her. "What were you thinking about?" he asked, stroking her hair.
She nodded, "My handmaiden's and their hearts." Amidala paused, "They dreamed about you, fantasized about you and here I am, living the fantasy. But fantasies are made to bring us hope and I can't crush their hope." He looked down, sensing the awkwardness in her voice. Amidala spoke, startling him. "Obi-Wan, before you knew who I really was - did you think I was a brat?"
The Jedi laughed, tightening his hold around. "You were Royalty, highness, but you weren't a brat."
"Humor me," she retorted.
Obi-Wan stared into her blue eyes. "You were you Amidala. Even in your
hidden form, you were still the
Queen. Qui-Gon recognized it. When we talked, sometimes he would complain to
me about a headstrong handmaiden that always seemed to have authority and regal
than the Queen or like the Queen."
She smiled, "You still didn't answer my question. Did you think I was a Royal brat?"
"You were a child then."
Amidala smiled at him menacingly, "And now? Do you still see me as a child?" she asked, snuggling against his neck for comfort.
Obi-Wan kissed her forehead. "You will always be my sweet Royal handmaiden. That's who I know and who I fell in love with," he paused, "I love who you are. I don't care if you're a Queen or Senator - I love the girl - the girl who is just discovering who she is,"
"I'll let the answer slip for now, because I don't want to annoy you,"
she joked, suddenly falling quiet.
Anakin. He never saw her as a girl - only a trophy to show off. Obi-Wan was
the first to see past her crown and love her for who she was and she loved him
for that. They were different people, but loved Obi-Wan that way. "Obi-Wan,
can I ask you a question?"
He snuggled closer, smelling her dark hair, "What is it handmaiden?" he whispered into her neck, tickling her with his sweet breath.
"On Tatoonie, did you know I was the Queen?"
"I didn't realize anything in the beginning but as Qui-Gon and kept contact, and as our feud drew to a close - I suspected something was off. Qui-Gon suspected as well but didn't say anything."
She frowned, "Why?"
He shrugged, "Our job was to protect you. I consider it..."
"A job?" Amidala completed, sitting up.
Kenobi nodded no, "A Privilege and an Honor." Sitting up to kiss her neck again.
Amidala smiled, "Well I consider it an Privilege and an Honor to be loved by you, Jedi Kenobi,"
Obi-Wan smiled, "As I also, highness. As I also,"
**
Anakin Skywalker walked casually into the main room, removing his cloak and settling it into the closet. He froze a minute, sensing a disturbance but ignored it as he made his way over to the kitchen to grab something to eat. As he opened the fridge, he froze again - only this time the feeling was more intense and somewhat familiar. He dropped what he was doing and quietly drifted across the room, towards Obi-Wan's room. As he neared, he heard giggles. Giggles? His Master wasn't alone. Anakin reached for the handle but got a strong feeling from the Force - a strong enough to feel what was happening beyond the door.
He felt around before feeling that "familiar presence", She lay next to him, giggling like a little girl and snuggling close, brushing her arms with his. Obi-Wan leaned down, kissing her shoulder and surprising her with a kiss on her mouth. Anakin frowned. He reached out with the Force, hoping he was wrong. She kissed him back, feeling down his back.
Anakin pulled back appalled by what he saw. Amidala - the love of his life
and Obi-Wan, his trusted friend and father - were together. He always thought
Amidala loved him, honestly loved him but obviously she didn't. She was toying
him around all along, playing with him like he was a boy and didn't know what
LOVE was. He clenched his fists. Anakin did know what love was. He loved Amidala
since the day he met her in
Watto's Shop. He moved away in disbelief. His Angel, his love, his Queen, his
Padmé didn't love him but his
Master.
~~
I had to leave.
You were my light
But
I cannot be yours anymore
For your heart belongs to another
**
Anakin pounded furiously on Palpatine's door. Tears were already rushing
down his cheeks before the
Senator even answered. The boy clenched his fists again as Palpatine answered.
He looked bewildered. Palpatine offered his hand on his shoulder, chauffeuring
him. Anakin sat down on his couch, still in shock over what he saw. He nodded
his head in disbelief.
"Anakin, what is it?" the man asked.
He looked up at him. The tears from his eyes strung but he didn't care. Nothing else could sting more than what he felt inside. A droplet rolled down his face and past his chin. "I've lost her." Was all he could say. The Senator nodded unsure what the boy was talking about.
"Anakin..." he began before realizing what he meant. Amidala. The Queen had betrayed him - why or how, he didn't care. Anakin was in his grasp. Still, his face looked soured to the boy though inside he was rejoicing. "I know you loved Amidala...but you have to think about this. She is much older than you are and she has responsibilities. She is after all, the former Queen of Naboo and a Senator of the Republic. She cannot risk her reputation for a Jedi Padawan. Being a Senator means so much to her. It means she can make a difference but in her own way,"
"Responsibilities to what?" he fumed, standing up. He raked his hands through his hair. Palpatine eyed him carefully. He was in great distress; spilling out everything before he even told him what Amidala did to him was more than just a fight or argument. It was something she did. Anakin continued, "How could she; how could Obi-Wan? I trusted them both and they betrayed me!"
Obi-Wan? The Jedi had something do with Anakin's distress. The Senator smiled a bit, standing up and taking Anakin by the shoulders, "Anakin, you must listen to me. The Queen has betrayed you; your Master has betrayed you..."
He nodded, "I felt more love and emotion coming from her than she ever
felt for me. It isn't a Mind Trick.
He loves her - they love each other."
"And that is why you must tell the Council about their affair. They will deal with Obi-Wan. He has acted irrationally and must face the consequences. Anakin?"
The boy faced him, "What about her? I don't want her to suffer for this. She doesn't deserve to,"
"But she must. She broke your heart, a heart than can never again be mended. Amidala toyed with your emotions and tossed them aside as if they were invisible. She MUST suffer for that." Anakin nodded. He was still in denial. His love for Amidala was strong, stronger than Palpatine imagined. "Anakin! She MUST suffer for what she has done to you."
He glared at him. Rage filled his blue eyes. Palpatine spoke again, "Do you know what you must do?"
The boy nodded, "I won't go to the Council." He paused, clenching
his hand eve harder, "I'll confront
Obi-Wan himself."
**
I can't be with you
No matter how hard
I want to be
**
Amidala kissed Obi-Wan one last time before she disappeared from his arms. She had been gone from her office at least a good 2-7 hours and the Captain was no doubt looking for her. He smiled at her, "Can you meet me in the Gardens tomorrow?"
She smiled back, "I don't know. I'll have to check my schedule but I'm sure I can fit you in, my love," and left.
Obi-Wan watched her leave. She was livelier than he had ever seen her before and it made him happy. He looked down, shutting the door. The Jedi turned but started suddenly as he noticed Anakin sitting on the couch. "Anakin, you nearly gave me a heart attack." He cried.
The boy smiled, "Who needs that?" standing up. He looked him straight in the eye, "So, how was your afternoon, Master? Sleep well?"
Kenobi frowned. He knew exactly what the boy was implying, "Anakin. You have to understand - we both care about you very much...."
"Spare me, Obi-Wan!" he retorted, "I was suspicious when Amidala asked you and only for you to assist her in the Senate. But let it go because I knew she loved me. However, since you two have become 'chummy' with each other - the Senate ordeal was probably a lie to be with each other night after night - in each others' arms."
"Anakin. I didn't plan on this. Amidala asked me for assistance and I complied. Jedi do not shun away help when it is needed. You know that,"
He growled, "But Masters' don't stab their Padawan's backs' either,"
Obi-Wan looked down, feeling ashamed for even trying to love Amidala. "You have every right to be mad with me, Anakin. But remember, before she even thought of you as a lover - she had a crush on me - a crush that turned into love over time,"
"And you think that justifies for what you did?" he asked, standing up to him. "No Obi-Wan. You were my friend and you betrayed me. I trusted you and you stole the one thing from me that gave me light. She was my Angel and you played on her emotions,"
"I did not!"
**
You don't belong to me
And
Perhaps you never did
I burn for you
But how can you
know that?
**
Anakin nodded, "You did. And because of that, I'm not longer your Padawan. You lost me Obi-Wan. You played with both our hearts and you lost me," storming out.
**
My Angel, my flame
I love you
But I can't stay anymore
So I say goodbye
Our paths are not one
Goodbye my Angel
I will miss you
~ Anakin ~
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