Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing
_This is my first attempt at a funny type fic so don't flame I'm trying.
Mission R&R
Chapter 1 'Goodbye Civilization'
Relena felt her eyes sliding shut as he tried to pry them open and read her documents, but the words were blurring and doubling and util they disappeared when her heavy lids shut momentarily. Jerking Relena pulled herself awake and shook her head as she reached for her coffee. Taking a lengthy sip of the already cold beverage Relena winced and placed the cup back on the table. She needed something to wake her up and something quick.
"Relena?"
Relena ran her hands through her honey blond tresses trying to replace any misplaced hairs and slapped her cheeks smartly in an effort to make them appear rosy and her face appear awake. "Come in." Relena said clearing her throat as she spoke and pushed the sleep out of her eyes.
Milliardo Peacecraft opened the door and let himself in to the Vice Foreign minister's office. He quickly glanced over his over worked sister. Her eyes were heavy and bloodshot and dark circles showed under her deep aqua eyes stunting their usually dazzling appeal. "That's it." Milliardo mumbled. "You're going home. I don't care if the documents aren't finished yet. You can do it tomorrow."
Relena shook her head. "What are you talking about." She managed. "The meeting is at seven in the morning. I won't have to time to go over all of them and this is my only chance to prepare. I can sleep later."
"Relena I can tell you're tired. What time did you go to bed last night?" He questioned.
"Bed?" She said slowly letting a short laugh escape her lips. "I didn't exactly go to be, but I did sleep on my couch for about six hours."
"Six?" Milliardo asked.
"Okay maybe it was four." Relena cringed as she waited for the outburst that was sure to follow. Her brother was way too overprotective. He knew as well as she did that it was necessary for her to get these things done. There was no one else. She was surprised when it didn't come. Opening one eye she glanced at his face to see that he was surprisingly calm in fact there was a small smile on his face. Relena shifted uncomfortably under the gaze. Had he finally snapped?
"All right Relena I'll let you stay up here and finish. Just make sure you get some sleep tonight. You don't want to fall asleep in the middle of making your point." He smiled wider and put his hand on her cheek. "Now get back to work. Finish as soon a possible."
"O..okay." Relena stuttered shocked that he had given in so easily. "Thanks."
"Do you want me to get you another cup of coffee?" Milliardo asked as he opened the door.
"Huh?" Relena looked up her eyes glazed she had nearly dozed off again. "I uh sure." She passed the cup of cold liquid to him. "Make it black and strong."
She watched as her brother nodded and disappeared into the hallway. She cocked her head to the side as she thought for a moment. It seemed as if her brother finally realized what was important.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Heero was bent of his laptop typing furiously as he scanned the pages that came up and occasionally glancing at the notes to his side and marking something on them. A full pot of coffee sat to his side and beside it a full cup of the bitter black liquid. Not even ceasing from his work Heero continued to type with one hand as he picked up the cup and took a sip. Fortunately he had the rest of the night to finish theses reports and get the research on the new organization posing a threat against ENSUN to Une.
There just weren't enough hours in the day to suffice Heero Yuy. He had too much work to do and not enough time to do it in. In fact he had skipped sleep for the past two days pulling up everything he possibly could on the group and the few people he had gathered names on. He started and executed his own intelligence missions. In fact there was one going on tonight which he had connected himself to them by satellite. Each member of his team had an earpiece and he had a small picture in the corner of his screen to he could see what they saw.
Heero glanced at the picture and brought up a schematic map and surveyed it. "Yeah, I know where you're at just stay there until you see something. There's a change of guard every three hours and you have about two more to go. I planted some bugging devices around the area so they should start to talk when they come out. You should pick it up." Heero heard what the thought was a collective groan from his men but that couldn't be possible he only pushed them as hard as he pushed himself.
"Sir," One of his men asked he recognized it as Smith.
"What soldier?" Heero asked going back to his report and taking another sip of his coffee.
"Sir permission to speak freely sir."
"Granted." Heero stated evenly.
"Sir, I was wondering if we would be home tonight? Sir, we're tired we haven't had a full nights sleep in three weeks. My hair is turning gray and I'm only twenty years old!"
Heero frowned. "I've been up every night for a solid month." He told him, "And I expect from you the same endurance. When you get what we need you can leave."
"Sir…"
"That's enough." Heero said sourly and turned off the link for the moment so he wouldn't be able to hear what they were saying. It beeped when they had something important to say. Turning back to his report he glanced at the black screen and blinked. That was strange. The words on the laptop were blurring. Blinking Heero found that they continued to slide out of focus. Giving the machine a hard slap he waited for the confusion to clear, but it didn't. Finally shaking his head he found that it wasn't the computer but him that was making the screen blur. "Must be loosing my touch." Heero mumbled and reached for his cup of coffee again. It took him a minute to finally grasp the handle and bring the steaming drink to his lips.
Even as it slid down his throat the thought he felt it working. Heero gave a wayward smirk and turned back to his screen. He didn't even notice that his hand had stopped typing or the way his head was leaning downward. Before he knew it his head was lying on the keyboard of his laptop and he was breathing evenly his hair falling in his eyes. Heero didn't even realize he'd fallen asleep until he heard a loud beep in his earpiece. Blinking he shot straight up refusing to believe he had just fallen asleep on the job. Heero flipped the switch and caught the words of his soldier, Smith.
"Sir we got what we needed. We have a name of the leader of the group. The men were talking about it quite clearly."
Heero frowned. Could he had possible been asleep for two hours! "Uh…good job men go back to base. Get some rest."
"Yes sir, thank you sir." He heard in unison and flipped off his earpiece.
Maybe he was pushing himself too hard. Perhaps he should go to bed. Heero glance at his couch just a few feet from where he sat the cushions so inviting. Then he turned back to his unfinished report. True it wasn't officially due for a few days, but he could very well finish it today and then he reasoned I'll sleep. Ignoring his couch and his desire for sleep Heero turned back to his work and plunged in.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Next morning 7:15 am ~~~~~~~`
"I know this sounds strange." Zechs explained, "but I think this is the best way to make her relax. In fact I think it is the only way. The ESUN conference can last without her. I'll be there and so will Noin. I know for a fact that we won't need her."
Lady Une shook her head. "I know she's not officially a Preventer but I would really miss have her opinions on delicate issues. She knows most of the delegates better than they know themselves and using one of my best Preventer's to carry it out. I don't know."
"If she doesn't have a break soon she'll wear herself completely down." Zechs reasoned. "It will only be for a while and she'll thank me when it's over with. Trust me her work will improve after this."
"I'm still not sure. I mean you asking me to give up the help of one of my top agents. I don't know…" She was cut off by a knock on her door. She turned to Zechs giving him an apologetic look. "What is it?" She asked. She was surprised to see one of her Preventer base guards at the door.
"Hello Ma'am." He said taking his hat off. "Sir."
"What is it Markus. You thought were supposed to be on duty."
"I'm ma'am but we had Yuy's men on duty today."
"I imagine that would be an honor." Une said evenly. "They've scored higher than any unit."
"I'm sure they do when they're awake," Markus emphasized, "but I've run across five out of the ten sleeping at there posts and I haven't even been all the way around yet. Apparently Yuy had them on an op last night. They were there from seven in the evening till nearly five this morning. The night before he had them up training. I think they're exhausted and I'm not mocking General Yuy but his men can't take much more of this."
"Thank you for telling me. Have you told Heero yet."
"No I though I would tell you first. We can't have them falling asleep on the job anymore."
Une nodded. "I understand. Don't tell General Yuy about this and send them to bed. Call up the next team on the rotation and Yuy's men will keep watch tomorrow." Lady Une watched him leave and glanced at the report Heero had given her that very morning. Three days ahead of schedule. As she thought about it Heero had appeared a little run down. His eyes had been surrounded bay dark circles and his skin pale. The idea hit her like lightening. Why not kill two birds with one stone.
"Zechs I think I'm going to agree with you. If we want our agents in top condition we need them to at least take a break now and then and now that I think about it. I'll give you two Preventer's and possibly a third if you do one thing for me."
"What's that?" Zechs asked not liking the tone of her voice.
"I want you to take Yuy as well. His men need a break and by looking at him I'm guessing he needs on too."
Zechs only hesitated for a moment and smiled. "All right. I can make the arrangements I just need to know who the agents are."
Lady Une smiled. "Only the best to for the best. I'm giving you Hilde Schibeiker, Duo Maxwell and Trowa Barton on call. I figure this will work better if they know the agents."
"Perfect." Zechs mouthed. "I'll get on it right away and talk to the three about the situation."
~~~~~~~~~~~`
Duo couldn't help but laugh as Zechs told him the plan. "This is perfect!" Duo howled between fits of laughter. "I always thought they worked too much."
Hilde smiled beside him. "So how do we get them to agree to this?"
"You don't Zechs informed them. They would never would agree, but I have a plan and with your help we can pull it off." Zechs glanced at Trowa. "I'll need your help especially in Heero's case. He trusts you so he won't suspect a thing."
Trowa remained mostly stoic but he held a large amount of amusement in his eyes. "Got it." He replied.
"Hilde, you're responsible for Relena. You guys are friends so she won't think anything of it." Zechs continued.
"What about me." Duo called from his seat. "What do I do."
"You come with me to get everything ready for their arrival."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Relena couldn't believe she'd stayed up all night and on top of that had just attended a very trying very exhausting meeting with ESUN. Her body was so tired and ready to sleep, but she knew that there was still work to do and if she took a nap now she would never get up. Practically dragging herself down the hallway she made her way to her office and pulled open the door letting out an exhausted sigh as she did it. With the door shut behind her she leaned against it and closed her eyes. That was a bad idea immediately her mind began to wander and she didn't even know that she was falling sleep until she heard someone calling her.
"What?" She asked forcing her eyes opened and looking around the room. She saw Hilde sitting on the corner of her desk smiling.
"I though you'd fallen asleep while standing up." Hilde said dryly and smiled. "So how have you been?"
"Good." Relena lied and tried to straighten her composure as she made her way toward her desk and sank into hard chair she had sitting there. It was completely uncomfortable but managed to keep her awake when she was tired. "So what business brings you my way Hilde."
Hilde frowned. "Always have to have a reason. I was just coming by to say hi, and I brought you a cup of coffee."
Relena smiled appreciatively. "Thanks." She grabbed the cup and took a lengthy sip. "Mmmm what is this it tastes sort of vanilla like."
"Oh…just something I added." Hilde mused smiling.
"Well Hilde I hate to cut this visit sort, but I have a lot of work to do and not much time to do it in." She frowned. "It was nice to see you, but I don't have time to talk."
"That's all right. I understand. Just drink all our coffee so you don't fall asleep."
"I will." Relena assured and waved bye as she took another sip.
Hilde was working hard to suppress the giggles that were about to burst from her mouth as she shut the door behind her. Instead of leaving Hilde leaned against the door and smirked as she looked at her watch. "One…two…three…" Just as she finished three a loud thud reached her ears. Hilde turned the knob and peaked into the room to see the Vice Foreign minister sprawled across her desk he coffee cup over turned the remnants of the dark liquid spreading across her desk.
As she looked back out she caught sight of Trowa coming down the hall a cup of coffee in his hand. She smiled at him and waved him down until he was mere feet from her and whispered. "Mission R&R is under way."
Trowa smirked. "This cup has enough in it to knock out an army of Yuy's."
Hilde gave him thumbs up. "I hope you're right."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Heero walked into his office and pulled the door shut behind him. He couldn't find the slacker Maxwell anywhere and he needed Duo report on their last mission. Heero growled as he ran his hand down his weathered face and through his disheveled hair. He seemed if anything to be more grumpy than usual. In fact he had just found out that his men were sleeping instead of keeping watch. As soon as he finished his report he was going to have a word with them and with whoever authorized it.
Slumping into his chair, Heero flipped open his computer and stared at his report the words were doing that blurring think again. The sentences doubling and paragraphs blurring together in one jumbled mess of words.
"Hey Heero. Thought you might need a cup of coffee."
Heero looked up blinking slightly and saw Trowa carrying two cups of coffee step into his office. "Yeah." Heero said simply and reached for it not realizing the dependency he had developed for the bitter liquid. Taking a heavy gulp Heero grimaced. "Does this have vanilla in it?"
Trowa shook his head. "I don't think so, but it might. I got it out of the Preventer's lounge." He took a sip of his hiding his smile as he drank.
Heero took another long gulp and turned back to Trowa. "Have you seen Maxwell." Heero asked and blinked as Trowa doubled and blurred out of focus.
"No." Trowa replied evenly. "I haven't seen him in about three hours."
"Well we have a report…that…" Heero felt his head start to swim and he shook it. "I…" The words wouldn't come and immediately he knew what the vanilla taste in his coffee was, a sedative and by his reaction quite a bit. Before he could even warn Trowa he slumped forward landing on top of his laptop and slamming the lid shut.
"Too strong for you?" Trowa mused and pulled his handcuffs from his pocket and snapped them onto his friend's wrists. Pulling the radio from his side pocket he flipped it one. "Phase on complete, over."
It wasn't long before Duo's voice responded. "Things are ready here. Have both packages as the airport in one hour. Make sure the first is heavily restrained."
"Roger, over." Trowa flipped off the radio and picked up his friend flinging him over his shoulder.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Duo smiled as he watched the eyes was his two new captures eyes open. They were both tied to chair their mouths un gagged but secured none the less. They weren't going to be able to break free. He heard Hilde come into the room beside him and examine the pair.
"Don't you think that's a little excessive." Hilde asked as she scanned the room her eyes resting on Heero tied to the metal chair with chains his hands handcuffed. "I mean you only tied Relena with a rope."
"I know Heero the first thing he would do with ropes is break his way out of them. This way we get to explain the situation before either one of them has a chance to escape, or even try to escape."
"This is supposed to be a vacation." Hilde pointed out. "Not a prison."
"Any place with no fax machine is a prison to them." Duo laughed and silenced himself as he heard a groan reach his ears. "Look they're waking up."
Hilde rolled her eyes. "You're enjoying this way too much."
"I just want to help. Besides this is the first time I've had Heero at my mercy." Duo grinned as Heero opened his eyes. This was for his best friends good anyway. He knew the man worked too much and if he didn't watch it he was going to burn out as fast as Relena did. Both of them were in major need of some fun and Duo considered himself perfect for that job. Just as he was thinking about it Heero's annoyed voice reached him.
"What is this Maxwell?" He demanded and pulled against his restraints to no anvil.
Duo smiled. "Hey you're awake. I'll explain a soon as your companion wakes up."
Heero glanced to his side and saw Relena equally restrained and unconscious. "What is this Maxwell. I swear as soon as I get free…" Heero growled and pulled his arms outward but nothing budged.
"I guess you were right about those chains." Hilde mused.
Relena blinked. She heard someone talking had she fallen asleep again? The last thing she remembered was talking to Hilde and drinking that cup of coffee. She opened her eyes all the way and was about to rub the sleep out of them but realized she couldn't move. Her arms were restrained behind her back and she couldn't move her legs. Glancing in panic around her she saw she was in a large white room and to her shock Heero was beside her.
"What's going on?" Relena whispered to him. She hadn't yet noticed Hilde and Duo standing in front of them.
Heero turned to glance at Relena and frowned. "Ask Maxwell." He seethed and gestured to where Duo and Hilde were standing with rather smug expressions on his face.
Relena turned around confusion all over her face. "What…?"
Duo smiled. "Hey Ojousan you're awake. I guess we can explain now."
"This is your idea of a joke." Heero questioned. "I'm going to kill you."
"Actually this isn't my idea it's Zech's"
"Zechs?" Relena stated in disbelief
"Yep Relena. He as well as the rest of us think you two work too hard. You haven't sleep in days and you're going to burn yourselves out so Zechs and Lady Une arranged a little vacation for you."
"I have meetings." Relena sputtered. "ESUN has that big conference next week I don't even have my speech finished and what if something happens."
"What about the new threat. I'm just making progress." Heero growled. "I can't possibly take a vacation."
"Sorry." Hilde said speaking up for the first time. "You don't have a choice. There are no phones, no fax machines, no phones, no newspapers, or computers, and no television. You are on an island of the coast of…" Hilde paused an evil smiled gracing her pert lips. "Well you don't need to know that, but there is no way off. No boats or planes come in. We have enough supplies for three weeks." She paced in front of them like a warden informing her prisoners. "If you run you'll be caught, but other than that you can do whatever you want. There is a pool as well as a private beach. There is a small T.V but it only plays movies of which we have a wide selection. Try to enjoy yourselves."
"So don't think of us as your captures think of us as vacationing friends." Duo said grinning. "Now I'll let you guys go." Duo saw the way both young people were steaming with anger. Duo gulped. "Maybe I'll leave you guys tied up for a while."
So what do you think? I will continue this one if you want me too. I think it'll be fun.